Beauty and the Punk [Phan au]

Chapter 25

"So you guys are together now?" "Yah." Was all I really said. I was Skyping Adam and PJ and Zoe. It was Saturday and Dan went to practice and I was avoiding all my 'friends'.

"You are going to get fat eating a lot of that ice cream. And you're lactose intolerant you're going to have a stomach ache." I rolled my eyes. "Ok mom." "Cut Phil some slack guys. There is obviously something wrong." PJ said. I bit my lip. "Am I really a whore?"

They looked at each other and laugh. "Why do you care? What has this Dan done with our Philly? Don't believe what other people say. You sleep around a lot so what? And it's not like you cheat. When you date someone you don't sleep around. Who cares?" "Adam is right. You are not a whore. A bit slutty from time to time but people are just jealous because they don't have enough balls to sleep around that much. Heck I don't have the balls to sleep around that much."

I shrug and smile. "Thanks for the comforting words guys. Always appreciate your helpful suggestions." The door opened and walked in a very sweaty Dan. "Oh oops, bad time?" I giggled. "No. What do you want?" "I wanted to take a shower and then lay down with you but I'm tired after practice and after I shower all I want to sleep."

"I didn't need an explanation damn. Take a shower, you're starting to stink up my room." "Ok." He said derply and then went into my bathroom. "Dan?" "Yah." "As long as we continue to talk in French we can still talk about him behind his back." I giggled.

Dan came out to me and stripped. "I don't know what you're doing. I don't get hard easily as you do." He stuck his tongue at me. "I don't like when you talk french. Are you talking about me?" "Yes." I giggled.

He scoffed. He was fully stripped down and I couldn't help but admire his amazingly fit body. "I see you checking me out." "Yah because you have a nice body and I'm gay. Get your ass in the shower." "Bossy. I like it." "I'm never going to dominate you so get over that thought now."

"Yah yah." He mumbled as he walked into my bathroom again. "I'll call you guys tomorrow." "Alright Phil. Love you!" "Love you too." I shut the laptop and stood up. I threw away the ice cream carton and straightened my hair a bit. I didn't care how I looked, it just felt weird when some hairs were in places they shouldn't.

I went to the bathroom and leaned against the wall. "Well are you going to join me?" "I feel gross." "That's what the shower is for." "Yah but I don't want you to touch me because I feel gross." He rolled his eyes. "Get your pretty little ass in here or I'll carry you in here." I rolled my eyes.

I stripped of my hoodie, shivering as the cold air hit my heated body, and then my lounge pants. I stepped into the shower, shutting the glass doors behind me. Dan smiled. "So how was practice?" "Hard. Though for someone extremely lazy as I am, I'm still one of the best players."

Dan was a boxer, I recently found out. I told him that that was possibly one of the straightest sports he could've played. He laughed it off of course. I honestly didn't mind what he played, he was incredibly strong and fit and that was more than ok.

I ran my hands across his toned chest and over his arms. I knew he was staring at me, but I didn't feel, for once, self conscious under his gaze. Usually he made me feel of all the flaws that I had when I was with him because I wanted to be perfect for him.

"What you thinking about babe?" "Nothing of significance, just about how I have so many flaws." "You seriously need to stop putting yourself down. I see the faint scars on your wrists and hips and scattered here and there on your thighs. You are beautiful and I do love you. You are very important to me Phil."

I smile, not being able to stop the smile and my heart pumping faster. "Thank you." "You're welcome. Now come on, giggle. I like hearing that." He pinched my sides and I squealed and giggled, jumping away from him.

Soon enough everyone found out that Dan and I were dating and in this town everyone knew that the Howell boy was dating the French intruder.

And as much as I loved dating Dan, it didn't feel very sincere. It was giggling and kissing and having sex, it wasn't the relationship that I wanted. All my friends ship us and tell us that we are perfect for each other but the longer we go out, the weirder it feels.

I miss Brendan in a way. I only thought about sex because you don't know what you want until it's gone. Brendan and I had deep long talks, Adam and I have deep long talks. Dan and I have deep long make out sessions, and yah, kissing him was great but that's what one night stands are for.

"So are you going to break up with him?" I was in Danni's room, my head dangling off the bed. I needed someone to talk to and she's the only one who cares and is actually available. "I don't know. I want to talk to him, but I like him so much I'm scared. I don't want to break up with him."

"Well I know this is my brother we are talking about but if you aren't happy, you do what you need to be happy. I think you should talk to him." "But how?" "Tell him that you don't like how things are going. Like say you love him and things are great but you don't feel like it's a real relationship. Just say basically what you said to me."

I sigh. "Alright. I'll go do that." I stood up, dizzily as all the blood rushed back down. "Good luck." I laugh out loud. "What is this? The Hunger Games?" She shrugs.

I leave the room and go down the hall to Dans. I knock on the door. "Come in?" I open it slightly and Dan looks up at me. He was just in bed, staring at the ceiling. Existential crisis.

"Hey babe." "Hi." I trudge into the room, shutting the door softly. "What's the matter?" "Nothing anymore. I'll talk you later about it." "No lets talk about it now." "But you're in a crisis. I don't want to drag anything down on you." "It's ok. It was a small one. I'm fine."

I sigh, sitting across from Dan. "What's up? You're sad." I shrug. "I just want to talk to you about something because I feel like we don't talk much." "What do you want to talk about?" "The fact that we don't talk much. Like how this relationship doesn't feel like a very sincere one. I like you a lot and of course kissing you and having sex with you is great but I just kind hoping for a more, I don't know, just more than a one night stand everyday."

It was silent, almost too silent for too long. "I don't know what to say to that. Like I get what you mean but I'm sorry that it feels that way. I'm not a really good person when it comes to talking and sharing thoughts and I'm sorry." "I want to know you Dan. I may be some fucker but in relationships it's different. And especially with you, I like you a lot and I want an actual relationship."

He bit his lip. "I'm sorry. I was just trying to make you happy." "And you do. I'm telling you the truth you do. I just want a more serious thing with you, ok? Don't stress that much about it, you don't have to pretend, let's just not base this relationship on sex."

He nodded and I smiled. I laid on top of him, in between his legs. His arms went around my waist and I kissed him softly. We kissed but they were sweet, soft and short pecks. I giggled and his hands traveled up my sides.

"I love you Phil. You are my everything. When you are with me my heart beats faster." "Don't be sappy." "It's true. It does." He places my hand on his chest and I giggled, it actually is beating at a bit faster speed.

We did actually spend the night hanging out. We played video games while I laid on his chest and then we just talked, about absolutely nothing, but it was one of the first nights that we've fallen asleep together without making out or having sex first. And waking up on his chest with his arms tightly wrapped around my waist made my heart warm and I fell for Dan even more