Chasing the Void (Magnates Series #3)

Kabanata 35

Kabanata 35

I was definitely bothered that I can't sleep a blink all night. Hindi ko man masyadong maintindihan kung tungkol saan ang pinag-uusapan nila pero ang malaman na malaki ang posibilidad na tungkol iyon sa gabing iyon ay hindi mawala sa isipan ko.

The explosion was truly not accidental. Something happened and they know what caused it. 

It was like a missing piece that would make me achieve what I was aiming for. Something that would give me peace of mind. The truth that I've been longing for.

I want to know. I badly want to.

Mabilis na lumipas ang isang Linggo na bumalik na ulit ako sa opisina ni Draisen. I was cleaning his office like I was used to. And I tried hard not to act differently after hearing what he and Captain Burgos talked about. 

"Ano? Masarap?" natatawang tanong ko nang kumain na kami ng tanghalian.

"It's delicious," he nodded.

"Grabe lang talaga 'yong privilege kapag girlfriend mo. Hindi ka na ilap sa pagbibigay ng compliment." may panunuya sa tono ko. "Hinay lang, masyado ka namang patay na patay sa'kin."

"Think what you want."

Natawa ako sa sinabi niya. I kept my playful expression while we were eating. Napadako ang tingin ko sa kanya, sinusubukang basahin siya. 

I was eager to find out about the truth that I want to straightforwardly ask him.

But him acting normally like nothing happened made me have doubts. Na kaya niyang umakto ng ganito kahit na may kung ano siyang tinatago sa akin. I won't be prejudiced since I've done that a lot of times before.

But now I'm aware that...it hurts. 

Hindi niya sinasabi sa akin at mukhang wala siyang balak. 

For some reason, I was having second thoughts if what we have is real or he's only putting up an act. Pero sa mga pinapakita niya ngayon, hindi ko maitatanggi na sobrang naniniwala akong totoo 'to.

Na totoong mahal namin ang isa't isa. 

Kung hindi, sobrang bilib ako sa galing niya kung gano'n. He went to this extent just to go with his plans? But who am I kidding? I know him as the intelligent magnate who has unlimited ways to keep everything under control. 

"Hindi ka pa matutulog?" 

Natigil ako sa pag-iisip nang biglang sumulpot si Chelsea na mukhang kakauwi lang. Nasa may veranda ako at nakatitig sa kawalan. 

"Umiinom ka?" tumabi siya sa akin. Kumuha siya ng isang lata ng beer na binili ko kanina para saluhan ako. "May problema?"

"Tingin mo meron?"

"You don't drink for nothing." 

I chuckled. "Bawal magbago? Baka nagcrave lang ako ng beer ngayong gabi."

I know that was such a lame excuse especially now that my chuckle sounded so force. Hindi na lang siya nagsalita at tumingin din sa kawalan habang sumisimsim ng alak. Everything was quiet and peaceful. No one dared to talk.

And her being like this, I know she's not forcing me to talk. But the silence is urging me to somehow be open. Huminga ako ng malalim at inubos ang nasa lata ko.

"I messed up," I started. 

"Hmm?"

"The plan...I completely messed up."

Hindi siya nagsalita kaya muli akong bumuntong hininga. Alam niya na mas lalo akong mapapakwento kapag tatahimik siya. I grabbed another can and opened it.