Chapter 15

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Disclaimer: small mention of suicidal thoughts. Its like one sentence, but if you get triggered by that stuff you should be careful with proceeding.

And I added that song cause- *Sance fangirl panic*

Lance's POV

"Stupid! Stupid stupid stupid! How could you be so flipping stupid!" I yell at myself when Sage walks out of ear shot.

I plop down on the edge of the rock, and plant my head in my hands.

"Stupid stupid stupid...now Sage will never want to talk to me again! She'll never even look at me! Oh boy great going Lance! You just ruined your entire future with the girl of your dreams because you made a move on her too early! I'm just the smoothest man on the planet, aren't I?" I scold myself. I let out a long sigh. I'm so stupid.

I look up at the fading meteor shower. The few streaks of light reflecting in my eyes. God Sage had looked so beautiful under the peak of the event. How her eyes shone in the dark. And how it seemed her hair glowed under the moonlight.

"Um...I know Renate and V have been talking about you...I don't know if you guys are real but...it wont hurt to try." I mumble to myself, looking up into the heavens. I run one hand threw my hair and huff out a breath.

"Hey um...the three goddesses...? Is that like the term you guys like or...anyway, I not religious. I never have been. My mom never let us leave the house for church. I don't if you guys are real. I don't know if it's just talk. But I've never felt 'close' to God. But...for some reason...I feel a presence. When I look up into the sky I mean. Like someone there. Watching me. And then I feel something inside me when I plant my feet on the ground. Like an energy flowing through my from the grass. And when I fly over the ocean I feel an almost comfort. Like a safety blanket. Someone keeping me safe. And I've only ever felt this when I woke up in the plane crash." I say loudly to the empty sky.

"I don't know if this is you guys or just...how Eladea works. I don't know if it's you guys or everyone feels this. Maybe its just normal here. But I cant help feeling that...I have a purpose. And that's why I'm being protected. That's why though everything we have been through, I always end up the least hurt. And...I think I understand what I'm supposed to do. I'm supposed to be there for Sage.

"The others, they bring things to the table. Renate with his experience and fi fighting skills, V with his flight and his fire and his stinger, Sage with her leadership and bravery. But what do I contribute? Sarcastic jokes? There's no reason for me to be here yet I am. So I believe I'm supposed to help Sage. Encourage her, push her, be behind her, be her shoulder to cry on. I know this. I feel this every time I look up into the sky, or touch the ground or watch the waves. But I need help. I don't know what to do. How to be the the person Sage needs me to be." At this point I'm ranting.

"Do I tell her I love her?" At this my voice breaks and tears spring into my eyes. I don't know why. Maybe its because I'm finally admitting it. Maybe its because I don't know what the hell I'm doing. "Do I just be there? Do I help her in leading? Please...goddesses please for the love of all things help me." I plead.

I sit there, frozen for the next few minutes. Head tilted up towards the star filled sky, hands gripping the edge of the rock, tears streaming down my cheeks. But nothing happens. No messenger is sent down from the heavens. No message shows itself through connecting the stars. No secret advice sounds out through the rustling of trees. No glowing manta ray that is the reincarnation of my dead grandmother lights up the ocean and shows me the way towards my destiny.

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