A fairytale without name (Rose and Marco)

Chapter 17

Rose

Of course it wasn't okay. Of course I thought he wanted more. Of course I created the perfect scenario in my head when he told me that he wanted to kiss me. I felt so mad at myself for watching him leave and calling his name after him. Even more furious when I burst into tears.

Watching the night sky of New York, sitting on the chair in my balcony cross legged, enveloped in a cloud of smoke I made the decision to stop crying over spilt milk. There was no use in mourning for something I never had. Determined, empowered and sure for myself, I went to bed. Tomorrow was the day I turned my thoughts into actions.

Waking up earlier than usual, I started my day trying to decide what I should do first. The decisions I made last night were all about me. And that was the plan. Thinking more about me, my wants and needs would bring the result I was hoping for.

I left the apartment before I had the chance to back down. I avoided my usual café, not for fear of meeting him but because I didn't feel like drinking the coffee he had paid for me anymore. Walking around the neighborhood, I spotted another small coffee place. I had never paid attention to it before but it would do. I ordered, giving the cashier my name and waited by the window. It was a sunny day today but the rain from last night affected the temperature.

Grabbing the hot cup of coffee, buttoning my jacket, I headed to a table outside. I was the only one out, so I chose the one at the furthest corner. On second thought I turned towards a more central one and placed my things on it. Change, I reminded myself.

No book for me today. I was currently working on subtitling a series so no "homework" needed. I played with my new phone instead. I reactivated my social media accounts, which were no longer in use and I downloaded some new apps, which were popular at the time. There it was. Change.

An email notification caught my attention. It was an invitation from the ATA, the American Translation Association. There was a conference in Minneapolis. I had never been invited to anything similar before and I felt proud that someone had noticed my work. I wasn't even a member, how had they found me? Dismissing the negative thoughts, I sent an affirmative reply and made plans for my time there. The conference was to be held in three-week's time and I had to get ready.

Getting ready meant shopping for professional clothing and some accessories. I guess my backpack and converse weren't good enough for a place like that.

Next on my list was a visit to Teresa. Seeing her feeling better made me so happy. I once again apologized for running away from the gym that night and when Stefano appeared, I told him that I was going to quit training with him. He had helped me more than I could have ever asked for, but I was done with it.

I learnt many things from Stefano. Not just about fighting but generally about life. He was always so kind with me. And whenever he was strict and pushed me to my limits, I knew he meant well. Both of them were sad that I was giving up on boxing, but I reassured them that this was not going to change our personal relationship. They will always be the closest thing to relatives I have in New York.

On my way home, I picked up some groceries and even bought a bouquet of flowers. My apartment needed something fresh and colorful. My mood was easily influenced, but today I was focused on the task at hand. Smile and don't think about anything else.

Back at my apartment I worked a little, tidied up my already clean space and finally relaxed on the couch with a glass of wine. I know that was so not me. But in the spirit of changing I resisted the urge of drinking a glass of gin. Instead I opened one of the bottles resting on my kitchen since the last time my parents visited me.

My parents shared a mutual passion for wine drinking. They would always try to find unique bottles, different tastes and had been on numerous wine testing trips. I never went along. But I must admit that this wine tasted divine.