I've Got It Under Control

four

Jules was quite helpless at this point. Parents worried, school pestering where she is, and now the police. Your life will never be the same, Jules. To be honest, what is keeping you alive?

A young man's voice knocked on the white wooden door. Pleading her to come out, or he will be forced to break down the door. There was an overwhelming silence, Jules was unconscious and once they enter Jules's cave, they will realise the depth of the situation. Wake up Jules, quickly you don't have much time.

The hinges gave in, the door frame was as though it was never there and the door was now in pieces and it lay across the floor, like a red carpet. I've got a gut feeling this isn't going to end well. The eating disorder is the real killing curse. A harsh gasp left the mother's mouth, she was in shock at the state of the room, the state her only daughter was in. I believe they thought she was asleep, she wasn't, as the officer shook her terribly thin body, his eyes widened, he waited for her chest to rise; it was the longest seconds of his life. Jules, Jules, Jules, this isn't going to end well for you my dear.

Her mother was freaking out, screaming, begging her daughter to open her eyes. A faint flicker of Jules's eyelashes spread hope across the room. As she opened her heavy eyes, two blurry silhouettes towered over her. She panicked, pushing the nearest person away, attempting to let out a cry for help, but nothing left her mouth, she was too weak, she was helpless. The police officer signalled on his radio for an ambulance, while Jules attempting to force open her eyes, trying to sit up and convince them she was fine. But believe me, she was far from fine. However that same persistent fainting and nausea spell trickled over her, and she was forced to lay back down. Space was dragged into her vision, tiny stars floating around in circles.

"Shhhh you are so fucking loud." Jules groaned out to her mother as she lightly tapped her finger on her dry lips. It was like Jules was drunk or high, maybe even both. Jules let out a sinister giggle, why you might ask, I don't think anyone really knows.

"Juliana? Have you taken something?" The police officer interrogated her.

"No, obviously not. And let's not call me Juliana. Please and thanks." She said completely out of her mind. She wasn't thinking straight. She was in a haze of her own mind, she felt fuzzy inside, slurring her words as she drifted in and out of consciousness.

"Possible overdose," the police officer informed the people over the radio. Her mother cried out, saying it's not like her daughter to do this. She couldn't have. No, she hadn't, but if you did your job properly you would realise your daughter was struggling with mental health so badly, that she would rather kill herself than be here another day.

The colour and the light in Jules's life had gone, replaced by monochrome grey. She thought back to the happy and warm moments that now feel cold and empty, just as if dark and monstrous clouds had settled over them.

You should have seen the mother's horrid face. She seemed more concerned about apologising to the officer about the mess of the room, the mess of her sick daughter; than Jules's own health. Well done mum, nice one. Caring more for your reputation than the actual problem at hand. Your dying daughter. Conversations were being thrown around from the police officer and the person on the end of the radio, not good ones may I add.

Seems as if you are going to be ending up in the last place you wanted to be.

Sirens filled Jules's ears. Sobs of desperate parents. Flashing red and blue lights sent Jules into a frenzy. This time she screamed, she shouted at the top of her lungs. Trying to break free of the tight grip which held her down. Her fists were clenched to the point that her fingernails dug and drew blood. She threw her head back, kicking her legs as she was wheeled away on a stretcher. Everything went black. Jules couldn't remember how she got on the stretcher, nor the ambulance ride to the dreaded hospital. But as she was rushed into the ER, the stretch and squeak of the blue gloves that were being quickly placed on the doctor's hands, alerted her to her surroundings.

A strong scent of rubbing alcohol, male aftershave, and latex wafted past her nose. The distant sound of waiting patients and busy doctors and nurses gave a cramped feel. Jules's mother stroked her head, a strong grip wrapped around her skinny arm restricted any sudden movements. Time to freak out Jules.

She shook her arms violently, yelling for help, as multiple people at a time hush her; and told her she was as going to be alright. She didn't listen. As Jules screeched, spat and scratched at the restrainers; her eyesight was still blurry and she was now placed in a room. While she was poked and prodded at, being told that she will be fine, that she needs to calm down.

You are embarrassing yourself, Jules. Just look at you, squirming around like a bug. While people look at you in awe, like an animal at the zoo. Needles were being attempted to be injected but failed, bright red blood flowed down her arm. She was still resisting, and no one could get the job done while she was acting like this. A doctor put his hands on both shoulders, she could no longer move the top half of her body, and streams of tears soaked Jules's face. She was hurting, scared and confused about what was happening. Chaos piled up in the room, it was overwhelming for Jules, as she gripped onto the doctor's arms, squeezing tightly acting as her only reassurance. The doctor ordered something, but her ears were ringing too loudly she couldn't make out what. Jules's eyes began to roll back, while she was desperately trying to stay awake. Darkness filled her head once more, silence and a little bit of peace would do her some good.

The doctors began to assess her, take her blood pressure, her limited blood and order endless amounts of testing. She was in a bad place. The doctors looked concerned at the skinny body that was failing her. Her organs were damaged, her heart beating far too slow, everything in her was dying, she was dying. The doctors rummage around her, trying to give her fluids and nutrients quickly, they attempt to fulfil her bodies demands and desperately try to save her. But she didn't want to be saved. They need to stop. She doesn't want this. She doesn't want any of this. Jules was ready to go, she prepared herself, I can only imagine the scene when she wakes up. Jules will not be happy.

Good luck with that. I wish you the very best.