The Dragon Variation

Chapter Forty Four

P A N D O R A' S B O X

Draco Malfoy

I lost my self-control when she walked through those fucking doors. I wonder if what was it about her that drew me in? —Her fucking hair, the way it falls like black silk and that thinned smile and dotted freckles.

I fucking hated not knowing what exactly it was—she's always been in the back of my head. A picture of her—I'd imagine what she might have looked like once she grew up. Leaving behind her childish features—to be such a nightmare of beauty.

Pansy was the closest I could think of—black hair. That was it. That's all I had to go off of. I'd fuck Pansy and imagine her instead —piecing her together in my head. But I didn't know—did I—I guess. Black hair, tall, skinny, pale—No. Long black hair, shorter, toned, fair—thinned lips, rosy cheeks, a confident stride. No, she had freckles, I know she did, and tiny scar on her palm—blended into the crease lines that no one would know unless she told you it was there.

It made me so angry in the beginning that I couldn't for the life of me figure what it was about her. I wanted to rip her apart and examine her entire anatomy just to find a trace of familiarity. I hurt her. Only trying to get inside her head—to pick it apart. To see what she's hiding. But not even she knows what's she's hiding.

But I knew it—somewhere buried amongst my wreckage was her.

It's her. That's the girl who walked in after 8 years of not knowing or at least trying to remember—but for the life of me I couldn't. Until she confirmed it for me.

It all started coming back—that summer—last summer being tutored by my aunt in Occlumency—the —the Cruciatus curse started breaking parts of my mind.

I was breaking my mind trying to remember her.

And when she asked me to teach her to skim a stone—it turned a key and unlocked a vault in my mind and all my robbed memory were returned. From the day we met to the day she left—watching my father point his wand at me and took it all away. Thieving.

But she doesn't remember me.

She doesn't remember me at all. I taught her chess. I taught her to skim stones.
It was me and she doesn't remember.

I have her right in my arms, on my chest, in my bed. I'm kissing her. She's kissing me—but she doesn't recognise that she's kissing Draco Malfoy—the boy who grew up with her.

Only Lord knows where she went. But I found her. I found my Olli after 8 years of not knowing who the girl in her my head was—it's her I'm sure of it. It has to be.

So, now, I'm left with a hollow emptiness in my gut that she'll never remember me. I'll never be able to make her see that I did love her first. Before anyone. Before she loved herself. It was me who loved her before anyone else had to chance. And I got you back. And I decline and dismiss to ever let you go.