Night Changes

40

Harrys teeth ground together, his eyes locked on me. His touch on my arms remained gentle, and yet, his face was hard. I could tell he was fighting with himself to stay calm, probably for the same reasons I had decided to be blatantly honest with him about the fact we had run into Ryan at the bar. Better to start off fresh, honest, and without secrets, than to start a whole new problem.

No one said anything for a long while, with me and Harry watching each other, and Niall and Louis standing back awkwardly. Finally, Louis spoke up.

“Ni, lets go back to the bar.”

“Da fuck?” Niall said, and I could tell he was looking at Louis like he was insane.

“Lets go back to a bar, find you a bird.” Louis said, before stepping around Harry and I to unlock his apartment door. Once it was open, granting us access, he quickly returned to Niall and started pushing him towards the elevator.

“Don’t you have to work tomorrow?” Niall asked, confused.

“Yeah, but my boss wont notice. Hes a prat, anyway.” Louis said, stepping into the elevator and disappearing with Niall as the doors closed.

Once alone in the hall with Harry, I felt increasingly aware of him. The tension now radiating off his body, whereas before he had been reserved and gentle. This conversation was supposed to be about us working everything out. About moving on and passed all our issues.  He had to remember how to balance his work life and his personal life, and I had to learn to mold the two versions of my Harry together. The work Harry that was still foreign to me, and the personal Harry, who I knew inside and out.

But with Nialls rather unclassy revelation, I had a feeling that part of the conversation was going to be preceded with one we had already had. And that one, hadnt exactly gone well the first time.

Sighing, I reached down, taking Harrys hand in mine.  Squeezing it tightly, I tired to get him to focus.

“Come in here,” I said, moving to pull him along with me. He resisted, and when I turned, I watched as he reached down and picked up the bag and flowers from the floor, before allowing me to pull him into Louis’ apartment.

Closing the door behind me, I lead him over to the living room. He silently set the bag of food and flowers on the table, before sitting down slowly.

I joined him, feeling nervous the longer he was quiet. Harry was not a quiet person when he was upset. So the longer we went without him saying anything, the more anxious and unsure I became.

Taking in his face, I tried to get a feeling for what he was thinking.

His face was a strange mixture of frustration and anger. His lips were pulled tight, his brow furrowed. His eyes were staring ahead, and yet, it seemed as if they were not really seeing anything. His posture was stiff, but yet, I could tell he was trying to keep himself calm.

When several moments passed with neither of us saying anything, I realized I was going to have to speak first.