𝙉𝙤 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢𝙞𝙣 ✰ 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙨𝙖 𝘼𝙨𝙝𝙡𝙚𝙮 (discontinued)

𝘼𝙘𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙙𝙧𝙪𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙣'𝙩 𝙫𝙚𝙜𝙖𝙣

        ❉ ✰Or do you not think so far  ahead?
  'Cause I been thinkin' 'bout forever ❉ ✰

Once we finished the crowd cheered for us. Individually shouting names. We waved then walked off stage. I was staring at my feet when I tripped. If felissa wasn't there I'm sure I would've broken something.

"You gotta pay more attention baby, I don't want you to break something" she suggested. I nodded and she put me back on my feet. We all sat down and drowned in the awkward silence. We all wondered about the future.

"Alright since no one is going to say it! I will! What are we supposed to do know? I mean we have built up such a great bond with Kai, iris, and Maggie. And long distance is a bitch" kaitlin admitted.

I looked at felissa who was avoiding my eye contact. I knew first hand that long distance doesn't work no matter how hard you try. Someone is either too far or not in it as much. I don't care how little or not enough time I've spent with her, I would trade it for anything.

"Felissa can I talk to you please" I asked her but my voice cracked. A look of Pain washed over her pretty face. "Yea um sure" she complied and took the hand I held out for her. We walked out of the back exit so we were alone.

"I wanna be honest with you..." I started. I was fighting two wars. One with my tears and one with my heart. I just felt like losing. "I don't know what to do. I don't wanna do long distance and then have to struggle to see you. I can't struggle anymore and you take that away, but not if your miles and miles away." I chocked up. The lump in my throat was too much for me. Small streaks came from my eyes and fell on the concrete I was staring at.

"Please don't cry, I hate it when you cry" she lifted my head with her finger and whipped away my tears. "We are gonna figure this out okay! We could Umm have designated calls and stuff like that! We can do it iris" she sounded so hopeful but I knew it wouldn't work. I knew all too well that this wouldn't work.

"It won't work felissa... long distance never works. It's not the same. I like to be able to lay on your stomach when ur sleeping, or to get piggy back rides when we feel like children. We can't do that in different states." I sobbed. "Iris" she started but I cut her off.

"No! No, this is my fault! Yea! It's my fault! I can't just have a crush on someone...I ALWAYS have to act on it! It's my fault for being happy! Maybe I didn't learn my lesson the last time, but I am now. Because this hurts more than anything else...and it's all my fault." I cried out. She pulled me into a bone crushing hug. I sobbed into her chest.

"It's not your fault, if anything it's ours." She said trying to pull me off of her a little. "Please, not now" I begged pulling her closer. If I let go then this is real. Then I will be losing something that just started.

"When are you leaving eve" she requested. "Kai and i's plane to San Francisco leaves at 7am tomorrow" I admitted in her chest. I could hear her heart stop then start again. I looked up and her and she was smiling.

"I just told her I'm leaving tomorrow and she's smiling" I thought to myself. I guess I looked annoyed because she started to explain herself. "We all are from the Bay Area" she cheered. "Wait- what" I was confused. I'm telling you my brain needs to speed tf up.

"We don't have to do long distance! We are in the same state, and city! Don't know how but we are" she exclaimed. My smile grew so big it started to hurt.

Her smile matched mine except my lips were on hers. The kiss grew passionate and heated but we broke it after awhile. I held her hand. "Let's go tell the others" I suggested. She agreed and we walked back into the he room.

"We have announcement- actually felissa has one...I don't do public speaking" I said giving everyone's attention from me to her. "Well umm iris and I aren't doing long distance....because...SHE LIVES IN BAY AREA" she squealed. Screams erupted from the room. Thank god everyone else left.

"I GET TO KEEP MY NEW BESTIE" Camille yelled getting up and hugging me. I hugged her back. Through all of her hair I saw Nicole and Kai smiling at each other. "God they are so cute" I thought. Once cam and I let go I was immediately brought into a hug from Naomi. It was shocking but I'm glad we are getting closer as friends.

"I'm glad I don't have to miss you as much as I would've" she whispered into my ear. "I'm glad too nomz" I whispered back. Once she let go we indulged in a group hug.

"This is nice and all but I gotta be up at like 5am and I don't do well when I don't get sleep" I admitted to the circle. They laughed and we all grabbed our things and walked out.

"IRIS" Angie called. "Yessss" I answered. She smiled maliciously and I knew exactly what she meant. I turned and crouched so she could get on my back. Once she was on I took off running.

"ONWARD TO NARNIA!" She yelled. "I swear they're high 90% of the time." Aniyah said to Maggie as we passed. I halted to a stop and turned to them. "Actually drugs aren't vegan sooo" Angie said in a mater a fact tone. I turned and kept going till we made it to the hotel building and I put her down.

We started walking in comfortable silence until i was legit dragged away. A hand on my mouth and everything. I was put against a wall. I rolled my eyes when I saw who it was. "Alexis...it's not that difficult to come up to me and ask to talk to me! Let's try that next time" I was annoyed.

"Sorry just thought this way was more fun" she laughed. I found nothing funny. "Would it have been funny if I decided elbow you in the throat and knee you in the stomach like I was taught." I asked. Her laugh faded into a cough. "Sorry ris, but I wanted to say bye since I can't come back to the bay, I gotta go stay with my dad for awhile" she mumbled.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I know you don't like it down there. I'll miss you lexis." I boosted and hugged her. "I'll miss you to Ris" she broke the hug. I walked to my room and waved bye before closing the door behind me.

I screamed. I fucking screamed. "WHATS WRONG? WHAT HAPPENED" felissa yelled searching for a problem. "Felissa baby, why are you in my room?" I tried to sound sweet. "Oh, I Umm wanted uhh" she was getting nerves. "You're adorable, I'll shower than we can cuddle" I instructed and her face lit up like the night sky. I grabbed some clothes and took a shower then completed my night routine.

I packed up all my toiletries that I wouldn't be using in the morning. I brung the bag out of the bathroom and set it by the door with the others. I looked over to see felissa actually awake. Shocker.

I got under the covers next to her and we watched charmed. It took some convincing but she finally gave in. We were about three episodes in when I heard heavy breathing. When I looked up from her chest she was fast asleep. I decided to finish the episode we were on then turn off the TV.

I turned everything off and pulled the covers up further. I used her body as a pillow while I slowly drifted to sleep.