HΣIШΔ

i seriously want to punch this bitch

"okay, look alive. meet our newest addition to the e-class faculty," karasuma states from the front of the classroom, looking like he'd rather be anywhere else than here. especially being that close to the shit-fest that is some whore fawning and throwing herself all over the monster that is our teacher.

"my name is miss irina jelavitch! nice to meet you all!" the bimbo says in false excitement.

if it weren't for me being raised in a crime infested city and around bipolar idiots throughout my childhood, i probably never would've realized that she was faking it. i'll probably end up looking her up, anyways. i prefer knowing everything i can about those around me, rather than being in the dark.

damn. i think i just realized how much izaya really has rubbed off on me.

my classmates, meanwhile, were talking amongst themselves about how weird this all was. that all started with a comment about how hot this bimbo is, which i can't deny, but still. disgusting.

the things' face went bright pink at all the attention. if he were human, he'd most likely have a major boner right now. what a fucking pervert.

the way she complimented him was completely sickening. even i, who's downright alien when it comes to romance and what women like in men, can tell that those qualities are not the type of thing that a regular, sane woman would look for in a man. it's just her way of getting him to let his guard down. she's a fucking assassin.

later, we were all outside, but while i was sitting down near the class as they played, they all were playing basically hot potato but they were hitting a ball with the octopus's face on it.

weird, but go off.

i looked back towards the building, seeing two windows open, and smirked as i saw the bimbo frowning.

her mask will come down soon enough.

looking back at my phone, i smirked when i saw the information i needed pop up. row upon row of information about the first rate assassin irina jelavitch popped up. most of the data was about how good at infiltration and seduction she was, but that was a given. i need more depth, but then i'd have to dig deeper, and i'm not in the mood for that kind of shit.

i heard the shouting get louder before i moved my head slightly to the side, barely being missed by the ball going straight past my face.

the damn ball almost hit me.

"oh my god, heiwajima-san! are you alright?" one of them, isogai i think, worriedly asked, and i sighed in annoyance.

"i'm perfectly fine, but try and keep the damn ball in the circle. you really don't want to see me get angry," i respond, not bothering to look up at him, but he apologizes and gets the ball back before going back to the circle.

i don't know how much longer i can put up with all this bullshit.

i glance up when i hear the obnoxiously fake voice call out for the octopus, putting my phone away as i boredly watch the exchange. she's so fake that it's almost funny, though it's more annoying than comedic. i hate people like her. fake motherfuckers always get hurt in the end, whether they like it or not.

his face turns pink again as she presses her boobs closer together to sway him, and he flies off at her whim for coffee.

what a slut.

the bell goes off and i stand up, stretching my arms out above me, and my back pops as i do. isogai asks the slut a question, to which she answers by being an annoying bitch and taking out a cigarette and lighting it, her voice taking on a dull tone.

so she's decided to drop the mask, eh? about fucking time.

everyone else seems shocked at the personality change, though, and i roll my eyes. are they seriously so fucking oblivious that they can't tell when someone's lying right in their face?

"heh. so what's your game, miss jelabitch?" karma taunts, smirking, and she turns to yell at him, "no nicknames!"

"we got ourselves a real pro here. just a word of warning from those who've been playing the odds, you're not gonna kill the octopus without help."

he's at least right about that. as much as i hate to a admit it, he's probably the smartest one here.

"please, sweetheart. you're a bunch of saplings. adults have their own way of doing things, take note. speaking of which, you're shiota nagisa, right?" the bitch says condescendingly, and i want nothing more than to punch the living daylights out of this motherfucking, whore ass slut who has nothing better to do with her time than try to look down on students that really have no choice but to be here.

she walks over to the blue haired boy, cups his face, and leans in to kiss his poor, innocent lips.

oh my fucking god, this poor, poor boy.

"his poor virgin lips just got tainted by her whore ass mouth," i say, and karma, who has moved close to my right side, laughs at my words, nodding as he does.

after she's done ruining his innocence, she holds his head up against her breasts, ya know, like a whore, and tells him to basically hand over all his information on the octopus.

"she ruins his innocence and demands that he give her information? wow, this slut really does think she's better than everyone. she can't even do basic observation work if she's asking a kid to give her his data. what a freeloading bitch," i say, knowing she can hear me, and she turns to me in a rage.

i just smirk as she growls at me.

"you brat! i'm more skilled than all of you combined! i could have your head on a stick right now if i wanted to!" she yells, but i just cackle at her words.

"wow, i'm so scared."

"shut up!"

three of her lackeys come towards us, and i glare in disgust as she says that she can substitute one of them for a kiss if a girl has information.

"with all offense, your bitches are ugly as fuck."

as the "pro assassins" all glare and she yells at me again, karma continues to laugh hysterically at everything i'm saying. i'm not even being funny, i'm just being the truthful little bitch that i am.

———

look, if my brother has to pay my tuition fee for this goddamn prep school, i'd at least like to get the effort of a teacher trying to teach me shit that i won't care about.

at least with the octopus, i can tune in whenever i want and he'll still be lecturing and i can say that my brothers' money isn't completely going to waste.

but she's not even fucking teaching us, and that makes me mad.

shizuo has always cared more about my own education than i have, and he said that if i wanted to, he'd go into debt just to have me go to college. but now, i'm just wasting my time with this bitch, and i want to punch her for, like, the twelfth time since i've "met" the woman.

money doesn't fucking grow on trees.

my classmates have finally had enough of her shit as well, it seems, because they start calling her a bitch too, using the nickname karma coined.

that's not going anywhere anytime soon.