The Prince (Harry Styles)

Chapter 30

I was awoken around three in the morning to the sirens whirring outside my window. Without a thought, I jumped out of bed grabbed a blanket, slid my slippers on my feet and rushed to my patient guard who quickly ushered me to a hiding place. Gemma was already in there when I got there. 

Numb. I felt numb. A life without Harry was numb.

I lay down on the bench that was chained to the wall and wrapped my large blanket around my body. I could feel Gemma's brown eyes looking at me worriedly. I didn't like the looks I was getting from everyone, but I had to push them away. There was nothing else but to push them away. The numbness did that for me. 

"Em, you okay?"

"Yeah," I breathed rested my head against my arm. I pulled the brown blanket tighter around my body and closed my eyes. 

The pain of living without Harry was beginning to tighten as time drew on. I couldn't begin to explain how much I missed his company and his constant protecting of me. I missed his smile and his everything. I missed how he comforted me in these situations. I missed my best friend.

It's been five weeks of this pain. Five weeks without hearing his laugh, his voice. Five weeks without feeling his touch against my warm skin, his kisses on my skin. I missed him so much. The pain keeps me awake at night. Rest was difficult as I was consumed with worry ninety-nine percent of my time. His safety was what I worried about. 

"Are you sleeping?" Gemma asked after a while of silence. The only noise that was heard was the sirens outside of the door.

"No," I said not bothering to move to look at her.

"I get you miss Harry, but moping about won't help," she said. "He'll be back sooner than you think."

"What makes you say that?"

"This time of year moves faster than the rest," Gemma shrugged. "He'll be home before you know it."

"Not soon enough," I breathed. "He's my best friend, Gemma. I have a right to miss him. He's more than just my boyfriend if that's what you want to call him."

"I thought I was your best friend?"

"It's complicated Gemma. I do enjoy talking with you, but I tell Harry everything. There isn't anything I keep from him. He knows everything about me," I sat up and placed my back against the wall. My legs folded up to my chest. 

"He does?"

"Except my birthday," I shrugged. "I never celebrated my birthday before so I didn't feel the need to tell anyone."

"It's still a horrible thing to know he left on your birthday. You cried on your birthday," she said wrapping her own blanket tightly around her shoulders. "You didn't get your birthday sex."

"I'm technically not supposed to be having sex," I snapped with a whisper. "If your parents were to find out, I would be publically shamed from ever being with your brother or any other man out there left for me. I'd be left for dead. A disgrace to my family."

"Harry would never let that happen," Gemma said.

"But he has no control over that. He can move on from it, I can't. If we can manage to keep this a secret until we get married, I am good," I said and looked at Gemma. "I can't imagine spending my life with anyone else but him."

"I know," she nodded. "You guys got lucky."

"We did," I smiled. "If it weren't for my mother I would never have met him."

"Thank God for mums," she laughed. "Are you going to visit your mum anytime soon?"

"I was going to today, actually," I sighed. "Clearly not."