The Perfect Submissive

Chapter 14

Jasmine

Perfect.

That explained my night , it was absolutely perfect being in the arms of Alexander. He was carful and soothing , I felt at ease with him beside me last night and when I woke up this morning I was greeted with my two boys making breakfast.

It was heart warming seeing how Alexander and Elijah got along together I was happy that they both built a relationship of their own without my doing. Alexander is a really nice man and theres no doubt in my mind that he's genuine to get to know Elijah, it's not because of me he wants to do it himself and I'm not going to stop that.

"This is so good baby where did you learn to make pancakes from?!" I ask Eli , I loved seeing his smile when I complimented him on anything he did.

"Daddy taught me!" He exclaimed proudly.

Eric. I missed him sometimes but than I know that it was best , if I didn't leave I wouldn't know what to expect being with him. I'd have to look out for any and everybody that has bad blood with Alonzo and having Elijah I couldn't put that risk on my baby.

From the corner of my eye I could see how tense Alexander got , he didn't let it show to much but I could tell the way his eyes roamed around his plate that he didn't touch anymore as if he didn't have an appetite anymore. If I'm not mistaken he looked to be sad.

"Ale-"

"Excuse me" he gave a fake smile as he stood quickly from his seat and went upstairs. I could see a hint of sadness in his eyes and something else I couldn't quite pin point.

"Hey baby why don't you go in the living room and watch some cartoons while I go clean up" I say to him , he waste no time jumping from his seat and heading to the living room.

Once I heard the silly sounds from the cartoons and lack of Elijah's footsteps I headed upstairs to see what was wrong with Alexander.

I knocked on his bedroom door softly expecting not to get an answer right away but to my surprise he opened on the first knock. He stood there waiting for me to say something but I didn't say anything , I couldn't say anything when I don't even really know what to say to him about something like this. So I did the only thing I thought of at the moment. I kissed him.

It was gentle and passionate , I loved every second of our lips together moving in a perfect sync. I pulled back but his hands were still circled around my waist.

"You look sad" I held his face in my hands.

"I'm not sad it's just- Well I- it's stupid" he removes his hands and walks into his room. I step inside and shut the door while he sits in the edge of his bed.

"It's not stupid I want to know" I kneeled beside him and looked up into his gorgeous eyes , man he was a real catch. He stayed silent for a while but than he closed his eyes and took a deep breathe.

"I'm never going to be as good with Elijah as his father" he said , I was taken a back from his confession because I didn't even know he was trying to compare to Eric. That's just crazy.

"Of course you aren't. Eric is his father and he admires him but your a very great man and he adores you also, I don't think anyone will be able to take Eric's place as Elijah's dad" I told him honestly.

"Right. So it really doesn't matter if I try because I will never be good enough is what your saying"

"No I never said that! I was trying to say that Eric is his dad who he has known his whole life your just-"

"Some guy who likes his mother and is nothing more"

"No I'm not saying that Alexander I'm saying-"

"You still love him don't you" I couldn't stand that he was doing this to me , what the hell has gotten him to act this way. Was it my words? Did I explain it to him the way I wanted to?

"Stop that! I didn't say any of that don't put words into my mouth" I told him , I was getting very frustrated and when I get frustrated things go into an very unexpected turn.

"It's like you said jasmine , I can't compare to him because he's the one you love and not me. I'm just wasting your time with all of this you want him back" all of the things he said were hitting me hard , my chest hurt and I couldn't control my breathing.

I felt as if the air was being knocked out of me with every word he said. Damn I hated when this happens , I can't control myself.

"Please stop Alexander" tears fall down my cheeks and I bow my head in shame , I never wanted to upset him or seem as if I still loved Eric.

"Why are you crying? Is it because you now realize that your love for him is more than me!"

I couldn't take this anymore before I do something I regret I stood up and started for the door in a hurry.

"I'm sorry that I bothered you I shouldn't have come here I'm sorry Mr.Newman" my breathing was increasing and I had to get my voice from shaking to much. I didn't want him seeing me like this he's going to think I'm some naive freak , I can't be here.

I ran downstairs not bothering to change from my bed clothes and got Eli from the living room. I put his shoes on fast and left out the door, I didn't know where I was going yet , maybe to a park, anywhere was better than being here and expressing my true self in front of him. He can't know.

I shouldn't have agreed to dating him , I knew this was only going to end up with me being the freak I was and I couldn't have that slipping.
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Woah that escalated quickly😐