Haunted.

28. The Lucky One

<<I just hope yall don't hate me after this one>>

And they tell you that you're lucky.

But you're so confused

Cause you don't feel pretty, you just feel used.
And all the young things line up to take your place.

Another name goes up in lights.

You wonder if you'll make it out alive.

Harry's eyes were plastered on her, she was so different from when he had met her. Her eyes had more experience, more depth, more wisdom, he even said. Music was over for him, he knew it. The number of lives he'd affected in a bad way kept him up at night. He knew damn well he hadn't been a nice person the last few years of his life... but he hoped that deep inside him there was still a caring and kind man.

There were times when Taylor crossed his mind... when he remembered that girl, because back then... she was a girl, and how he genuinely fucked her life up. At first, it was devastating for him... he saw her so fragile, so kind, so innocent, it tore him apart to see her image all messed up in the news.

He would think of ways things could've happened... it was useless, he knew. But that didn't stop him from thinking about it.  He could've told her since the very beginning the plans their companies had for both of them, maybe she could've played with it better... though he knew she would never accept to be false back then, he would also think of telling her the truth and talking it through... Harry wasn't sure if that would hurt her even more or help her. Either way, he knew now that the Harry that did that was lost, broken and hurt. He was a dick and he could say it out loud for everyone to hear, he knew he was.

But as time passed, he had time to think about his life and the way he was living it, deciding to change it. Thinking back, he knew he never really loved her... how could he if he wasn't the real him back then, if what he showed her was false, if she didn't know what happened in his mind, in his heart. He was sure that he cared for her and god, he really did appreciate her, and admired her so much. But didn't love her, how could he if what she had fallen in love with was a lie?

That came into realization time after she started publishing songs again. For her... it might be love, but it was not real. He was sure that what she had felt was the rush of the first love, the one that keeps you on your nerves, the one that makes you fly and feels like fire in your veins. The love everyone experiences at first, the one that hurts you the most. Harry knew everyone has that one.

 But Taylor was older now, so was Harry. She loved music and she lived for it whileHarry had gotten used to using all his money to become a better person, as he likes to call it when he uses it to donate or create different associations for different causes. 

She, as a person, didn't really trouble him no more. It was the way things ended that made him uneasy, the fact that she didn't know the truth and lives with a different idea of what happened. He knew he had to talk to her and clear everything up, he needed that and he knew she deserved that.

>><<

This is a short one but rn I'm working on the next one!