Rupaul's Drag Race- queen oneshots

Im so fucking sorry// shalaska

Aaron rolled over in bed and opened his eyes, the sunlight shone through the window and slightly blinded him in his early morning haze. He could hear the shower in the other room run, this made a small smile grace his face at the thought of his partner. As he pushed himself into a sitting position he felt a small shoot of happiness, his fiancé was home today, he had been away working for the past 6 months and it was a huge relief to have him back. With a stretch and yawn Aaron reaches over to his bedside cabinet to get his morning pill, he had just gotten over a chest infection and this was his last day on antibiotics. When he opened the drawer his to grab the small container his eyes landed on a piece of shiny card at the very back. His hand shakes as he reaches out and takes the slightly crinkled photo, it was one of him in drag along with miss Alaska thunderfuck, his eyes glazed over as he looked at the pair of them, they looked so happy. The pills lay in he drawer, forgotten about at the moment as he stares at the oh so bitter sweetly familiar face he used to call home, why wasn't it him? Why did it have to be Justin?
Aaron's chest felt heavy with a mixture of guilt and sadness "I-I'm sorry lasky...Justin... I'm so fucking sorry" he whispered, a tear streaking down his pale cheek. He couldn't believe it was 7 years already, 7 whole goddamn years... it wasn't fair. "It should have been me that night... I was the dumb fuck that got us in that mess so I should have been the one to pay the repercussions" he continued to speak to the photo of his ex lover, he sniffles slightly as he remembers that night. "It was a stupid thing to do, I don't know why I thought it was okay to drink and drive... I know it was irresponsible and I know i shouldn't have driven with you in the fucking car, I should have listened to you when you begged me to stop, to slow down" his grasp on the picture was tight, as if holding on to the picture could somehow have been enough to hold him there with him. "I knew it was a mistake from the start, before you got into the car with me, before you begged me to stop... before you went flying through my windshield... I knew it was stupid and I'm so fucking sorry Justin... I caused your family so much pain, when they got the phone call, when they came to see you and... and when they had to turn off the life support. I know how much pain I caused them but I'm still so selfish and I was trapped in my own flurry of self hate and misery, the day of your funeral when they told me I wasn't welcome was the day I hit my all time low, I wouldn't leave the house, I wouldn't sleep or eat but I guess you saw all that... Jinkx was the one who snapped me out of it, I'm so grateful for her, every single day she would come up and make me have at least two meals a day and shower at least twice a week...." a teardrop fell onto the photo in his hands. "One day she reached her limit and she made me realise something, you died because of me and my dumb habits, my addictions... she helped me realise that i couldn't live like that. Through your death and her encouragement I managed to quit drinking and any drugs I took cold turkey and I really did feel better for it. I was still me but I made less dumb choices, I'm just sad it took you leaving me for me to realise that. Um.... everyday I feel so guilty, not only for killing you...." he paused for a moment after he said that, taking a deep, shaky breath. "But I moved on... I've moved on and everyday it fucking hurts to know that you can't live this life with me, I love my life right now but I can't help but to feel that I should have lived it with you. Not that I don't love who I'm with because god knows I love him so much but there's always a sense of wonder ya know...." Aaron's eyes closed as he hugged the photo to his chest for a minute, trying to send his love through the veil in hopes Justin will feel it and know. He slid the photo into the drawer and quickly took a pill, he wiped his tears and let out a small sigh. The sound of running feet sounded and Aaron smiled, his bedroom door was flung open "DADDY!" His daughter cheered, she leapt onto the bed and hugged him, she was only five and idolised her dads, she always loved Aaron's spooky stories though. He hugged the young girl to him "hey kiddo, you're up early!" His daughter gave him a gap tooth grin, freckles were dotted on her nose. "Daddy said we could go to the zoo today!" Her excited voice made Aaron's heart warm, he loved the life he had. "That's great pumpkin!" He leaned into her ear and whispered. "We don't need to go to the monkeys, your daddy already is one" he teases, she laughs. "Im tellinnngg" Aaron chuckled and tickled her sides causing her to squeal with laughter. In all the carry on he hadn't heard the shower stop, he looked up as his partner walked in fully clothes after getting ready in their bathroom. "What's all the hilarity?" He asked, leaning down and hugging their daughter. "Daddy called you a monkey" she said, sticking her tongue out at Aaron. "Well Jessica... Jessica said you smell" he lied playfully, heir daughter gasped. "Pants on fire!" The parents laughed "okay honey, go pick out what you want to wear and daddy will come dress you in a minute" Aaron said, Jessica smiled and ran off. The two men fell into a silence, Aaron was pulled into a side hug "I know it's always hard on his anniversary... are you okay?" Aaron didn't know how to answer this question, well he did: no, but he didn't want to say that, instead he shrugged. "We'll get through this"
He smiled at the whispered words "I love you jerrick.... I really do..." the black haired out of drag drag queen pulled back and smiled "I love ya too needles"

A/N- MKAYYY GUYS HEY! Idk if you like the ending were sharon and Jinkx end up together but idk, if not then you can always imagine it was someone of your choice😂 anyways, I have a chapter I'm in the midst of writing, an aja request so I will have that up soon enough❤️