as much as i wanted to drop everything and move back to california, i knew it was impossible. i still had two months left on the lease of my apartment, and who even knows what would happen between kian and i. i could drop everything in new york, move to california, only to have kian and i not work out. this whole idea seemed disastrous.
i hadn't told anyone about what i was thinking though. i just didn't want to seem like the bad guy. i ran back into kian's arms and confessed my undying love for him, and now i don't want to do anything about it. the whole scenario gave me anxiety.
i pulled into kian's driveway, completely ready to explain everything to him on a whim with no preparation at all. i had no idea what to say, and it made me nervous. i left grayson with jc for the time being, and planned on grabbing him later.
i rang his doorbell, and it opened immediately. kian kissed my lips briefly, pulling me into the house. i hadn't kissed him in so long, and it felt great to be with him again. he didn't pull away, and i didn't either. it just felt so familiar, like home.
next thing i know, i was pulling him upstairs into the same familiar bedroom we once shared. i pushed the door shut with my foot, laying my back onto the bed. the same comforter lined the top of the bed.
when i finally realized what had happened, we were both naked and out of breath. it never dawned on me that having sex with my ex boyfriend was a bad idea. what made it even worse, is that the whole reason i came was to talk to him.
"alli, i missed you so much. not just this way, but in every way possible," he mumbled, planting a kiss on my shoulder. i blushed at his words, but i also sighed.
"kian, i'm going back to new york soon. i came over here to tell you, but this happened. as much as i want to get back to how we were two years ago, i can't just leave everything i have in new york. my lease isn't over for another two months," i rambled. he sighed.
"how about we make a deal, okay? when your lease is over, you will legitimately put thought into moving back to california. and if you decide against it, you can stay in new york. but you will always have a place in california at this house, okay?" i nodded, resting my head on his shoulder.
"while jc has grayson, wanna go for round two? i mean, i am leaving for new york in like a day, might as well make the most of it," i shrugged. he smirked, leaning down to kiss me again.
"i really like the way you think, al," he mumbled inbetween kisses.
//
the next day, i stood at my terminal at the airport with kian and jc by my side. i didn't think that it would be this hard to leave them behind. i did it once, i figured i would be able to do it again. i was so wrong, and it made me reconsider leaving at all.
the second they called grayson and i's flight, i couldn't hold it in anymore. tears streamed down my face as i grabbed grayson and our carry on into my arms. kian kissed me one last time, and jc hugged me tightly before i got onto the plane.
i sat grayson in the seat next to me, and buckled his seatbelt. it felt like my whole world was crashing down. kian and i aren't even together. it shouldn't hurt this bad, but it does. because i know that it was always him, and it will always be him.
"mommy, how come you're crying? are you okay?" grayson asked, grabbing the end of my shirt. i wiped my tears before turning to face him.
"i'm okay, i just miss daddy a little bit," i smiled. he nodded, snuggling as close to me as possible. i still had a few more minutes, so i went on my phone to distract me. it did nothing to help.
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"you were crying at the airport, when they finally closed the plane door. i can barely hold it all inside. torn in two, and i know i shouldn't tell you but i just can't stop thinking of you." just so you know, i cried too. i never thought i would see you again, get to hold you again, let alone kiss you again. i might be a stupid teenager, but the smartest decision i ever made was being with you. i will not stop until you are in my arms again, forever. #KianandAlliForeva 😉😍❤️
i can honestly say that kian was the greatest thing in my life. there was no doubt that i wanted to be with him again. i was positive that i was going to move to california when my lease was up. kian missed out on two years, and there was no way he was missing anymore.
//
thanks for 1.9k reads!! i have some stories in my drafts, but idk which one to continue writing, so if you want to hear and tell me your opinion, comment below!! xxx
