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     "Here, I got that." Joe took the kettle out of Stephanie's hands, pouring the warm water into her tea mug as she watched him with her arms folded, irritated.

     "Thanks." She spoke through gritted teeth. Taking the mug as she turned towards the living room, Joe following close behind her.

     She went to sit down and he rushed to her side, his hands settling on her side. "Let me help you."

     Stephanie swatted him away. "God damn it Joe! I'm not helpless!"

      "I just wanted to help you Steph."

     "I don't need it." She sank down on the couch, propping her feet up on the coffee table. Her head fell back against the cushions, hoping to relax.

     "Why are you such in a bad mood?"

     "I'm not, I just don't need you hovering over me!"

     "Steph you just got out of the hospital."

       "And I'm out because I'm better, I didn't break a bone, I didn't have some disease, I'm fine."

     "No, you just lost a baby."  Stevie whipped her head up, glaring at him. "What?"

      "That wasn't necessary."

      "Steph I'm worried about you." He sat down next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, which she instantly pushed off. Joe sighed. "Baby you haven't said a single word about it ever since we left the clinic. I'm just worried you're not processing all this."

      "Joe I'm processing in my own way. And I'd really appreciate it if you didn't treat me like I'm going to break. I'm ok."

       "How?" He questioned.

      "Excuse me?"

      "Steph," he took her hand, and this time she didn't push him away. "I'm not handling this well."

       She looked at him shocked, furrowing her eyebrows. "You didn't want a baby Joe."

     "But knowing you were, it's got all these thoughts running through my head, what it would look like, it's first words. How are you handling this ok Steph? Because I'm breaking apart over here."

      She adverted her eyes, switching her gaze to her hands as she played with her rings, taking deep breaths. "We grieve in different ways." She spoke monotonously, her breath hitching as she held back her emotions back.

     "That's bullshit."

    Stephanie glared at him, yanking her hand away from his as she let her feet fall back to the carpet, standing up. "I'm done with this conversation."

        "You can't run away from this Stephanie!" He yelled after her as she walked towards the kitchen.

     She turned around, throwing her hands up exasperated. "What would you like me to do Joe?"

     "I want you to tell me how you feel!"

     "You want to know how I feel?" Tears welled up in her brown eyes, wether it was from her anger or sadness, she didn't know. "I'm fucking devastated me. I feel like there's this big gapping hole inside of me and I don't know why! I didn't want that baby, but it's killing me. You think I don't have those same questions?"  He looked down at his hands, hiding his own tears. "Every time I look at you all I can wonder is if they would've had your eyes, if it was a boy or girl, what we would name them." She was openly crying now, her voice hoarse as he looked back at her. "So I'm sorry if I don't want to talk about it, because I don't want to think about it. It hurts too much. God damn it!" She yelled at herself, frustratedly wiping her tears away. "How can talking about this out loud possibly help?" She looked at him, her eyes watering as he stood, taking her into her arms.

    "I don't know baby." He held her tight, his own tears falling into her hair as he rested his chin atop her head.

      Joe held her for however long she needed, letting her sob as he ran his hands up and down her arms soothingly. She pulled away, sniffling. "Where are you going?"

     "I have to get ready for work."

      "Not today." He pulled her back into his arms, kissing her temple. "You're calling in sick, and they can't say shit about it because you have a doctor's note, and you're going to lay in bed with me, or go out and wander around, or practice some of our songs. Whatever it is
you need to feel better."

     She didn't respond, burying her head into his chest. "Ok?" He questioned, only feeling her nod.

    "Ok."

    

       

       

     

       

      

     

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