CUT

Bonus Chapter

Leslie 

Cole is gonna die. 

No he's not going to die. 

Yes he is.

My mom is going to be so upset. She already lost my sister and my dad... she can't lose Cole too.

Hanna was only ten. She was only ten! 

Concentrate Leslie... Don't let your mind go wild. Not now, not in this crisis. 

I slap my hands on my face and I start pushing my palms into my eyes. What's wrong with me? 

Why did I have to be born with ADHD? I can't deal with it... I can't even concentrate on my dying brother. I'm such a terrible person!

I feel tears threatening to come out of my eyes. No no no!  

I can't cry. I cry way too much, I have to do something. 

Suddenly, Sabrina comes running into the waiting room of the hospital. Her eyes are red and her face is extremely poor. 

"Sabrina?" I ask, expectantly. 

"I let him go," She says. Sabrina walks over to me and gives me a hug. "I'll miss you." 

Before I can say anything she's running out of the hospital. 

No not Sabrina! She loves him, he loves her! She can't just leave. I sit down and put my hands on my head. If Sabrina leaves then... 

"...I mean she's just beautiful you have to see her..." I turn to hear the voice of a man walking into the waiting room. His face is flushed red and he seems to have been crying. But he had the biggest smile. He's talking into a cell phone. "I can't believe I took part in giving birth to such a beautiful baby." 

Babies. I wonder how Red is doing, she's definitely a beautiful baby. She's always smiling and giggling. She reminds me of when...

Leslie! Concentrate! 

I snap up and heave a breath. I need to think about Cole. 

Cole. Cole. Cole. 

He's my brother, he's been there for me all my life. I love him and I don't want him to die. 

Tears start flowing from my eyes and I can't stop myself from crying this time. 

"Leslie." A voice says. 

I wipe my eyes and I look up and my eyes widen at what I see. 

"Carson!" I exclaim, standing up and wrapping my arms around him. "Where have you been? We've called you so many times, I left you like ten messages!" 

Carson puts one of his hands on my hair and whispers, "I'm sorry." 

"It's okay," I say pulling away. "But we need to find the front desk lady and ask her if you can see Cole." I turn around frantically trying to remember what to do. 

"Wait, Leslie," Carson pulls my arm.

"No, Carson you don't understand! He's in critical condition and- um- where's my mom? I need to find my mom. She's probably in the bathroom, where's the bathroom?" I frantically blunder out my words. 

Carson turns me towards him and he puts both hands on my face. "Leslie, concentrate. Listen to me. I need to talk to you." 

I stare at him. "Okay." I say. 

Carson leads me to the chairs and has us sit down. "I know about Cole, your mom just called. But before I talk about him, I need to tell you something first." 

I stare and I nod slowly, not trusting myself to talk. 

"I've been a jerk lately," He says. 

"Oh Carson! That doesn't matter now, you were just grumpy! Cole and I will forgive you-" 

Carson puts a hand on my mouth, shutting me up. "No, Leslie. I need to tell you why," He starts. "Ever since you started dating that guy... i've been jealous?" 

"Jealous?" I ask confused. "Have I not been spending enough time with you Carson? I'm sorry, let's go to the movies or something together," I pause. "No wait... Cole oh yeah Cole's sick. I can't go anywhere. You need to see Cole, Carson. He'll be so happy to see you."

"Leslie, this is important," Carson says. "I need your full concentration. Don't say anything till i'm done." 

I nod. 

"I was jealous Leslie, because I didn't want you going out with him," Carson says. I raise my eyebrows, but refrain from saying anything. "I don't want you going out with anyone Leslie. Cause... I think you should be with me." 

He stares at me and I take it as a sign I can speak. 

"I am with you Carson," I say. "I'll always be with you, you're my best friend. Is it really that bad if I date?" 

"You don't understand," He starts. "I-" 

"Leslie, Carson," I turn to see my mom standing there looking as sad as ever. "I'm so glad you're here Carson. Come with me and i'll go get you registered so you can see Cole." 

My mom is already taking Carson hand and pulling him away. 

I sit there, and I try to concentrate. Carson was trying to tell me something, and like always I don't understand. I barely ever understand anything. I'm just too slow, they might as well put me in a mental hospital. At least when i'm there i'll be restricted and I won't have to disapoint people with my stupidity. 

I sit here for an hour with jumbled thoughts. One thought leads to another and I lose my meaning. I see Carson re-enter the waiting room and walk towards me with a thoughtful look on his face. 

"Did you see Cole?" I ask. He nods, but doesn't say anything.

"Um..." I start. "I'm sorry I didn't understand, i'm hopeless." 

Carson turns to me and stares at me for a while. I shy away from his gaze. 

And then he kisses me. 

When he pulls away he continues to stare. "Do you understand now?" He asks. 

As the puzzle pieces come together in my mind I nod yes. 

"I understand." I say. 

He takes my hand. "You don't always have to concentrate. If you can't do it, then... just let go." 

"Okay, I will." I say. 

And then I kiss him.