Chapter Seventeen
For a second I can’t speak, and Adam says, ‘Hello? You there?’
‘Y-yes, sorry. Erm… this is a bit awkward.’ I can hear music in the background. ‘C-can you.. I mean, can you talk privately?’
‘Of course, I’ll just patch you through to my office.’ Adam sounds intrigued. I hear a hold tone for a few seconds then his voice again, much clearer and silence in the background. ‘All good. So what can I do for you?’
‘Please don’t hang up when I say this.’
‘What’s going on?’
‘My name’s Cheryl’ I take a deep breath. ‘I’m a friend of your sisters.’
Adam doesn’t answer, but I can hear him breathing. I decide to stay quiet, let him process it. ‘You’re a friend of Kimberley?’
‘Yes.’
‘Is she alright?’
‘Well…’ oh God, why am I doing this over the phone? ‘Well that’s why I’m calling.’
‘Where is Kimberley?’
‘Shes—she’s in Los Angeles.’
‘Excuse me? Los Angeles? Kimberley?!’
‘Yes, she came here with me.’
‘Is that where you’re calling from?’
‘Yes.’
‘Is this a joke?’
‘Of course not! Adam… can I call you Adam?’
‘Sure. What’s going on? How did Kimberley end up in LA?’
‘She came here with me a few days ago now. Shes… she’s in the hospital.’
Adam goes quiet again, for a very long time. ‘Are you still there?’ I ask quietly.
‘I’m here.’
‘D-did you hear me?’
‘I heard you. What happened?’
‘I’m not really very sure. She went into… diabetic shock.’
‘Oh Jesus. Oh my God.’ Adam gasps. ‘How could she be so stupid? She wasn’t taking her medicine, why?!’
‘She was taking it. I think she ran out. Look, I… I know what happened between you two. Kimberley told me.’
‘She did?’
‘Yeah. Look I know how you must—well, I don’t but... oh God I wish I didn’t have to do this over the phone…’
‘Tell me. Please.’
‘Kimberley’s in a coma.’
Adam is quiet for a few seconds, then his tone changes, becomes unexpectedly business-like. ‘Can I ask where exactly you are calling from? I’m getting the next available flight to Los Angeles and I need to know where to go.’
I let out a huge breath I didn’t know I was holding. ‘Really? Seriously?’
‘Of course. She’s my baby sister.’ His voice cracks and he clears his throat. ‘Who exactly are you? How did you meet Kimberley?’
‘That’s a really long story, Adam. I think that should wait until we meet face to face. I’ll give you my number, you can call me or text with flight details and I’ll arrange for a car to pick you up at the airport and bring you straight to where I live.’
Deciding I should tell him exactly who I am before he sees me I add, ‘I’m Cheryl Cole, by the way.’
‘…You’ve got to be joking me now.’
‘I’m afraid not.’
‘Cheryl Cole? How did Cheryl Cole meet my sister? And end up in Los Angeles with her?’
‘Like I said, long story.’
‘Right… here, I’ll give you my mobile number… I’ll let you know when I’m boarding. I’m coming as quick as I can, Ms Cole.’
‘You don’t know how glad I am to hear that.’ I sigh.
‘Did Kimberley tell you to contact me?’
‘No. She… she doesn’t know I have at all. She’ll probably kill me if – when she wakes up. She… she thinks you hate her.’
Adam doesn’t respond to that. Instead he says, ‘I’ll let you know when I’m boarding then.’
‘Thank you. I’ll have someone waiting for you when you land.’
‘Ms Cole?’
‘What?’
‘Thank you for getting in touch.’ He says, and he hangs up.
**
I go back to the hospital, elated by the conversation with Adam. ‘He’s coming.’ I say to Sarah when I burst into the room.
‘Who is?’
‘I called Kimberley’s brother. He’s actually coming. I knew he cared, I knew it.’
‘Well why wouldn’t he?’
I realise Sarah doesn’t know anything about Kimberley’s fallout with her family. ‘Never mind. The point is he’s coming.’ I lean over Kimberley and grasp her hand. ‘Did you hear that?’ I whisper to her, stroking her hair. ‘I’m sorry I went behind your back babe, but I did it for you, and your brother’s coming. Kimba?’ I lean right up to her ear. ‘Adam’s coming, Kimberley.’ I kiss her forehead and sit down, still holding her hand. ‘Has anything happened?’ I ask Sarah, not looking away from her pale face. ‘While I’ve been gone?’
‘Nope. Doctor came in for another look but said nothing had changed.’
‘Did he say anything else?’
‘I asked him when she’d wake up… but he didn’t answer me.’
‘She will wake up. She has to.’
‘Cheryl…’
‘You can go home if you want.’ I tell Sarah. ‘I’m gonna stay here until I get a call from Mark.’
‘Mark, your chauffeur?’
‘Yeah, he’s picking Adam up at the airport when he lands, so when he tells me he’s met him, I’ll go home to… talk to him, before I bring him here.’
‘I’ll stick around.’ Sarah says softly. ‘That way I can be here with Kimberley when you go and meet her brother, she won’t be alone then.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Course I am. I’ll go and call Tommy.’
‘Sarah… you’re amazing.’
‘I know.’ Sarah grins. ‘Seriously though… the poor kid. I know her brothers coming but… isn’t there anyone else?’
‘No… I don’t think so.’
‘What about her mother? Her father?’
‘Her dad died.’ I tell her sadly. Sarah’s face dropped and she looked at Kimberley, shaking her head sympathetically.
‘What about her mum?’
‘It’s a long story.’ I sigh, looking back at Kimberley’s lifeless form. ‘A really long story.’
‘Maybe you can both tell me someday soon.’
‘Yeah… maybe.’
**
I fall asleep beside Kimberley after several hours, and Sarah waked me up, shaking me roughly. ‘Chez! Wake up, quick.’
I sit up and look straight to the bed. But Kimberley hasn’t moved, hasn’t changed, nothing. Exhaling sharply I turn to Sarah, kneeling next to me. ‘What?’
‘Your phone rang, I had to leg it out of here to answer it, it was that Adam guy. He said he was boarding.’
‘You spoke to him?’
‘Yeah… it was really awkward, but he just said to tell you he was boarding. So not much longer, and he’ll be here.’
I stretch and roll my aching neck back and forth. ‘That’s good, that’s really good. I’ll call Mark and let him know roughly what time to be there…’
‘Cheryl, when did you last eat something?’
‘Err…’ I think back, and as if letting me know its been too long, my stomach growls loudly. ‘I’m not sure.’
‘Jesus, Cheryl.’
‘I just haven’t been hungry! It must’ve been the night before all this happened… we didn’t eat in the morning then… I spent the rest of the day looking for her when she ran out.’
‘Why did she even leave?’
‘She found out about Andrew, and we had a fight.’
‘Why would knowing about Andrew lead to you arguing, and her running away? I don’t get it.’
‘Like I said. It’s a long story.’
‘Did she hurt you?’ Sarah says abruptly.
For a second, I can’t answer, the image of Kimberley drawing back her fist, her face twisted with rage, flashes through my mind. ‘No, of course she didn’t.’
‘Why don’t I believe you?’
‘She didn’t, I promise.’
‘Alright. Come on, we’ll go and get something to eat.’
‘I’m not--’
‘Cheryl, don’t argue with me please.’
**
Sarah practically forcefeeds me some crap from the hospital canteen, then I go straight back to Kimberley. I fall asleep beside her again, and again Sarah shakes me awake. ‘Cheryl? Sorry doll, but I reckon you should head home now. Get ready to meet big brother, yeah?’
‘Why what time is it?’
‘About ten hours since he called to say he was boarding.’
‘Sh*t… thanks, Sarah.’ I stand up and glance down at Kimberley. I haven’t let go of her hand in hours.
‘Chez?’ Sarah puts a hand on my shoulder. ‘I won’t leave her, I promise.’
I lean over and kiss Kimberley’s forehead. It’s a bit cold. ‘I’ll be back really soon.’ I whisper to her. ‘Try and be awake for us, yeah?’
‘Good luck.’ Sarah calls as I leave the room. I give her a wave and head for the car.
**
When I arrive home, it’s getting dark. I let myself in and put the kettle on, rubbing my eyes. I haven’t slept properly since the night before we fought, only catching bits of sleep while sat with Kimberley.
I sit on the couch, fidgeting, letting the tea I made go cold. I start to nod off, then I see a flash of headlights and jump up, running to the door. I wait there, watching a man climb out of the front seat and grab a gym bag out of the back, then shake hands with my driver Mark and make his way to the door. He slows down when he sees me. As he comes into the light the first thing I notice is how much he looks like Kimberley. The same eyes, the same face shape, features, only her lips are fuller than his. ‘Ms Cole? Oh my God it actually is you.’
I can’t help smiling. I hold my hand out and Adam takes it. ‘It’s good to meet you in person, and please call me Cheryl. Come in, come straight through.’
Adam follows me through to the kitchen. ‘Can I get you anything to drink? Are you hungry?’
‘A coffee would be brilliant, thank you.’
I set about making the coffee, and he sits in one of the chairs at the kitchen table. He looks utterly exhausted. I place the drink in front of him and sit facing him. ‘How was your flight?’
‘Long. Too long.’ He runs a hand through his dark hair and looks at me. ‘What can you tell me about my sister? Have you seen her today?’
‘Of course. I was with her up until about an hour ago.’
‘And what’s she like?’
I have no idea how to answer that. But Adam saves me from answering. ‘It’s ok. Maybe I don’t want to know… yet. I just want to see her.’
‘I’ll take you to her, whenever you want, just say the word.’
‘Not yet. I was…I was hoping we could talk…’
‘Of course, anything you want to know…’
‘Kimberley… she isn’t alone, is she?’
‘No, she’s not. My friend Sarah, she’s with her right now.’ I lean closer, wait until Adam meets my eyes. ‘I wouldn’t have left her by herself.’
He nods slowly, takes a gulp of coffee. ‘How on earth did Kimberley end up in LA? It seems so bizarre to me.’
I can’t help myself. It just comes out. ‘Maybe if you’d bothered to find her or get in touch with her in all this time, she wouldn’t have got here in the first place.’
Adam runs his hand through his hair again. ‘There are things you--’
‘What? Don’t understand? Maybe not, but Kimberley told me what happened to make her leave.’
‘What exactly did she tell you?’
‘That she unknowingly had an affair with your fiancé, and that you and her mother turned your backs on her without letting her explain, or defend herself.’
Adam glares at me, clutching the coffee mug between both his hands. ‘How do you think I feel about that now?’ he whispers.
‘Well, I hope you feel f*cking horrible, to be truthful.’
‘Who are you anyway, to tell me what you think of me? All you know about me is what Kimberley’s told you.’
‘True. And up until she told me why she left her home and her family and her life, I thought you were a nice guy.’
‘You can’t stand there, you with your silver spoon up your arse, telling me what you think and how you think I should feel.’
‘Don’t you dare start that.’ I stand up, furious. ‘You don’t know a single thing about me, Adam.’
He seems to wilt. His shoulders hunch and he bows his head. ‘You’re right.’
‘Anyway…’ I sigh, sitting back down. ‘I shouldn’t be talking to you like that. The point is, you’re here.’
‘Where did you meet Kimberley? I thought you were from Newcastle.’
‘I am, I think the accent speaks for itself! I met her there, that’s where she was when I found her.’
‘Found her? What do you mean?’
Oh Sh*t… I decide on the spot to tell Adam straight, get it out of the way. ‘Ok…Adam, this might shock you.’
‘What?’
‘When I met Kimberley, she was addicted to heroin.’
Adam looks like he didn’t hear me. He blinks in confusion. ‘Excuse me? Did you just – oh my God.’
‘She’s fine now.’ I hurriedly tell him. ‘She got through it, she beat it, when I met her she was a mess, and she wouldn’t talk to me about anything, but she beat it and she really opened up and… she’s such an amazing person.’
Adam just stares at the table. He takes another long gulp of coffee. ‘Heroin.’ He says, more to himself than to me. ‘Jesus Christ. Kimberley? Heroin?!’ He buries his face in his hands. ‘This is all my fault.’
For a second I am inclined to agree with him. All he had to do was hear his sister out. She never would have run away if he’d just listened to her. But I go around the table and awkwardly put a hand on his shoulder. ‘It’s ok now.’ I tell him. ‘You’re here. Despite everything she believed, you’re here and when she wakes up she’ll be so happy to see you.’
Adam stands up abruptly and, unexpectedly, he hugs me tightly. ‘Thank you.’ He says thickly into my shoulder. ‘You took her in. You took care of her. My God, when I think what could’ve happened to her if you hadn’t been there…’ he pulls away, awkward. ‘I would’ve thought… because of your brother…’
‘What about it?’ I snap.
‘Well, he was the same wasn’t he? A drug addict? I saw it in papers...’
‘He was. But not the same. Andrew was… very different. And the papers don;t tell you everything.’ Deciding to change the subject, I tell him something else. ‘I never told Kimberley about Andrew.’
‘What?’
‘She… she found out by herself. I don’t know why she was doing it but she found an article about him on the internet, and she went mental. We fought, she ran off… I found her on the beach, and she was already very sick. That’s how I came to call the ambulance.’
‘She didn’t have insulin with her.’
‘She did. It was in her bag. I always wondered what was in that bag that she didn’t want me to see… but they were all used, she had none left.’
‘Stupid, stupid girl.’ Adam whispers to himself. ‘Why? If she’d told you before, this wouldn’t have happened, she could’ve got more.’
‘She’ll be ok.’ I tell him. Though the unbelievable, suffocating fear, the tiny part of my brain that keeps telling me she might not be nags at me. ‘She’ll wake up. Are you… are you ready to go and see her?’
‘I don’t think so, but… yes, let’s go.’
‘Are you sure?’
Adam drains his coffee and stretches. ‘I need to tell her… I’m sorry. Even if she can’t hear me.’
**
On the way back to hospital in the car, we are silent. Adam stares out of the window. I can’t imagine what he must be thinking, feeling. ‘I should probably warn you…’ I say slowly. ‘My friend Sarah… that’s Sarah Harding. The singer. You know of her?’
‘Yeah, I know of her. Half of the girls who do karaoke in the bar sing either her songs or yours.’ He smiles. ‘She’s with Kimberley now?’
‘Yes, they only met a couple of times but they got on well.’
‘I’m glad my sister met someone like you.’ He says sincerely. I smile to myself.
‘I’m glad I met her too. Might be fair to say the circumstances could’ve been better… but we’ve become very close.’
‘You know what, it’s always made me angry, reading rubbish stories about celebrities.’ He says, looking out of the window again. ‘I’ll never believe a bad word written about you.’
‘Wow, thanks.’
‘Listen… can I tell you something?’
‘Sure.’
‘You know… what Kimberley told you. About me and Jen. We were engaged.’
‘Yes, I knew that.’
‘I found out not long after Kimberley disappeared… Jen’s pregnant with my child.’
I don’t say anything, too shocked to answer. ‘It makes things complicated.’ He continues. ‘Very complicated.’
‘I don’t really know what to say.’ I tell him honestly.
‘That’s okay. It’s just… when Kimberley wakes up…’ I can’t help notices he places a determined emphasis on the word ‘when’, ‘I don’t really know how I’ll tell her.’
‘Well, you can worry about that when you come to it.’ I tell him, pulling into the hospital car park. I get out and pay for parking, then turn around, realising Adam hasn’t got out of the car. I open his door. I’m not in the mood for this. I need to see Kimberley, too. ‘Hey, big brother.’ I say loudly. He jumps a bit and looks at me. I fold my arms. ‘Your sister needs you. Lock the doors when you’re ready.’ I throw my car keys into his lap and stride into the hospital. He’ll come in when he’s ready.
