Another Broken Smile

49- Two for a day

Six Ten

Meghan stands there animatedly talking to Daniel's dad and another business man that I recognize from several of Meghan's parties as they all returned from the same flight.

Just like me, Daniel has come to pick his dad up from the airport. But he isn't alone.

His navy blue suit is ironed neatly. His red tie glazes the white office shirt that he wears, ready to mark his first impression. He stands there conversing with all of the high profile businessmen with a charming smile and making them feel that he belongs there. Among them.

There is a cluster of these high profile suits standing and smiling at each other and introducing their kids to one another. Daniel has his arm draped around the waist of a girl who seems to be our age. She looks beautiful and clever. She looks like one of the daughters of the businessmen with her sharp green eyes taking in the surroundings and her contagious laugh that never fails to crack everyone up. Her lively personality lights the room and she dazzles in the spotlight . Her raven black hair cascades down her shoulders putting my mousy brown hair tied in a messy bun to shame. Her white dress with a blazer seems to charm everyone while I stand in the corner with my half wet clothes from the previous night. She holds everyone's everlasting attention on herself and I don't blame anyone for their unfaltering attention to her, because she is someone who deserves that attention. She is that unattainable star in the spotlight that shines so bright that it blinds everyone around.

But her blinding presence burns something in me.

I hear the crack in my heart as it shatters on the floor again. 

Its pieces rolling to the floor in different directions making them difficult for me to catch hold of any of them.

It didn't hit me completely until now that ever since Daniel and I decided to reset our love and try again that a part of me knew it had already lost him and had never let him inside again. 

He had broken my walls down the first time and made me fall in love with him two years back but on the day I found out he cheated on me, my walls had crumbled to the floor. 

I stood in a tower with shattered bricks of what used to be a wall around me. 

So when Daniel kissed Sarah in his drunken stupor, that night in front of me, or when he didn't bother showing up at the hospital I was expecting our breakup. Letting him go, seemed impossible at first but then I realized, I wasn't scared of letting him go. 

I was scared of him becoming someone else's. 

I was scared of being left with nothing to be tethered to for, after all, my whole life that's what I'd been. 

I was my father's daughter, I was Meghan's unwanted stepdaughter, I was someone's friend, I was Daniel's girl. Sadly, I was never mine and now that I was the only one I had left, I was lost.

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Going to school the next day is a hell of a task to do. School finally reopened on the third of January after the winter break, and I groaned in annoyance as I got ready in the morning for a new semester.

New semester only brings in more books, more college applications and the dreading end of this year. We would be finishing high school this year and as much as I can't wait to get out, the real world scares me even more. I would finally have to decide on one college that I want to pursue in, move out of Meghan's house and finally live on my own terms. I would also turn the ripe age of eighteen this year just in the mid of July and then I could finally be free.