All for You (Harry Styles Fanfiction)

Chapter 34

Addison's P.O.V ~


Eight days.


That's how long it's been since the last time I spoke or saw Harry, which was the day I left to go back home. There has been no contact between the two of us for almost two weeks.

Nothing.

Eight days has felt like eight years. I barely make it through each day without breaking down and crying. I've closed myself off from others, I only leave my room when I'm forced to like when I have to go to school or when my mum forces me to eat.

The first day was one of the hardest. After I came home from the airport, I immediately went to my room and sat in my bed for hours just staring at my phone waiting for Harry to call me. Every time my phone would go off, I would run to it and see if it was Harry. It never was. I spent the rest of the day cooped up in my room, ignoring my mum when she tried to come into my room and ignoring Natalie's texts and calls. I didn't eat that first day, I just had a couple bottles of water and a handful of peanut M&M's.

The second day was my first day back at school since everyone found out about Harry and I. I woke up ten minutes before I had to leave and threw on a sweatshirt and skinny jeans, not bothering with my hair or makeup. I checked my phone and saw ten texts from Natalie, two from Liam, and one from Niall. Still nothing from Harry. I had a mini break down before I eventually collected myself and headed off to school. I grabbed a banana so my mum would shut up about me not eating before I for in my car and drove to school. I saw Natalie as I was walking to first and she tried to talk to me, but I quickly walked the other way. I went through the day like a zombie, only speaking when I was spoken to and zoning out every other time. By the time lunch came around, I literally felt sick to my stomach so I called my mum and told her I was coming home since I wasn't feeling well. I managed to avoid Natalie all day so I didn't have to deal with her questions about Harry. I went home and crawled into bed, making sure to hold onto my phone just in case Harry called. I don't recall ever leaving my room that day.

The third day was the worst day. The moment I woke up, I felt pain in every fiber of my body. I could barely get up, so I decided not to go to school. I managed to convince my mum to call the school and verify my absence before she pestered me about eating yet again.

"You know you have to eat Ad. It's not healthy." She told me.

"Yeah." I muttered as I pulled the covers further over my head.

She gave up and left for a work meeting, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I stared at Harry's contact name for hours, contemplating whether or not to call him. I stared at his contact picture, which was one of us at the movie premiere smiling at each other, completely oblivious to the fact that people were taking pictures. I smiled at the memory, the first time I smiled since I got home. But my smile quickly faded as time went on without a phone call or a text message. The third day was the first day I went on Twitter in a while, and I was welcomed with plenty of tweets asking if Harry and I were still together or if we broke up. I clicked on Harry's profile and saw that he tweeted a couple things, none of which I knew the meaning of. Well, I guess his phone worked. I spent the whole day crying and sleeping. At one point, I got up and started throwing anything I could find against the wall. What happened was a blur, but I do remember tip-toeing over broken glass to go lay back in my bed.

My mum came home that night and walked into my room. To avoid an argument, I pretended that I was sleeping as she swept up the glass on my floor, muttering a couple curse words as she did so. She also left me a plate of food that I didn't touch, since I knew I would end up throwing it back up later. Natalie called about five times that day, all of which I continued to ignore. Eventually she gave up and left me in peace. At around midnight, I started to think about Harry. His brown hair, his emerald green eyes, the way his dimples became visible when he was actually smiling, the way he would squeeze my hand whenever he felt that I was scared or uncomfortable. Everything came rushing back, and again I broke down. I curled up into a ball on my bed and rocked back and forth as I cried my eyes out. Eventually, I ended up passing out with an insane headache.

The fourth day was better than the third, but not by much. Again I decided not to go to school because I knew I wouldn't make it through the day without crying or being stared out. People probably know something's up since I almost never miss any school. There was still nothing from Harry, and I started to slowly give up on the hope that he would come to his senses and call me. But I knew I could call him, but I didn't in fear of him not answering like he did when he left for the X-Factor. This whole ordeal started to feel like a replay for me, since this is how I acted when Harry left three years ago. But this time was worse, since I fell for him harder than I did before and I was actually stupid enough to think he wouldn't do this to me again.

The fourth day was the first day I left my bedroom. I went downstairs and sat down in the living room to watch TV for a while. I found a marathon of Law & Order and settled on that to get my mind off of my situation and focus on ones that were worse than mine. That was also the first day I ate an actual meal. I found a turkey sandwich in the fridge and managed to eat it without throwing it back up. I sat and watched t.v. for about an hour or so before the doorbell rang. The hopeless girl inside of me thought it would be Harry, who finally realized that he was wrong and missed me. But instead it was Natalie.

"Why haven't you been answering my texts or calls?" She asked angrily as I opened the door, but quickly shut her mouth as she noticed my appearance.

I haven't been able to sleep through the night so I have lovely looking bags under my eyes. I can't remember the last time I took a shower so my hair was greasy and I probably smelled terrible. I haven't put an ounce of makeup on since I came back and I've started to break out because of all the stress.

"Holy shit Ad.. You look uh, different." Natalie stuttered as she tried to phrase her thoughts other than saying "you look fucked up."

"Yeah. Do you want to come in?" I asked her and she quickly nodded before walking past me and into my house.

"When was the last time you left your house Addison?" Nat asked as she looked around my house.

"Since Monday." I said quietly and received a look of concern from Natalie. I know she hated seeing me like this, especially since she's seen me like this before when Harry left.

Natalie stayed for an hour before her mum started asking where she was, so she left. She tried to get me to talk about Harry and about how I was feeling but all that would do was make me feel even worse, even more worthless. She also tried to convince me to come back to school but I refused, I was in no state to make it through a whole day of school. I spent the rest of the day with my headphones in my ears as I laid in my bed.

The fifth day was another bad one, but not as bad as the third. I had to restrain myself multiple times to keep myself from calling or texting Harry, until I finally caved and dialed his number. The phone didn't ring at all, instead it went straight to voicemail.

It's Harry. You know what to do, his taped voicemail message boomed and I felt a pain go through me after hearing his voice for the first time in five days.

"Uh, um hi." I squeaked out as I tried to put a sentence together.

"I just uh.. I wanted to call and see how you're doing.. How the tour's going and how the lads are doing.." I started off, but then all the anger I've had built up inside me decided to make its way to the surface.

"You can't just do this to me again, abandon me. You promised me you wouldn't leave and.. and now look! I'm a wreck without you Harry! I miss you more than anything and God knows what the hell you're doing. You probably don't even care." I said before I realized this was a terrible, horrible idea.

"Bye Harry." I choked out and quickly pressed the end button before I threw my phone across my bed.

That's when I broke my one day clean of crying and broke down on my bed.

The sixth day was the first day I took a shower in almost a week. It felt good to feel clean instead of a dirty wreck. I washed my hair and body multiple times before I got out and changed into a clean pair of clothes. The sixth day was also the day I decided to go back to school. I had to surround myself with other people, to hear about their problems so I could stop thinking about my own.

I could feel everyone staring at me as I walked around school for the first time since the beginning of the week. They probably knew, they probably read some stupid article online saying some bullshit lie like I cheated on Harry or he cheated on me. I ignored their stares and whispers and continued with my day, thankfully making it through the whole day without any major melt downs. Natalie invited herself to come to my house after school, so she helped me catch up on everything I missed and we did some of our homework together before she had to leave so she could have dinner with her family. My mum had a late night work meeting today, so I heated up a frozen dinner meal and settled with that. I managed not to go on Twitter that day, so instead I finished my homework and went to bed early so I could try to get some sleep.

I woke up early in the morning on the seventh morning in a sweat. I had another nightmare, the same one I had the day I left Harry to come back home. This one seemed more real, like he was right in front of me and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't reach him. Thankfully it was the weekend, so I didn't have to worry about school. All I had to worry about was not being a hot mess all day. It was the first day I saw my mum for more than five minutes, and she offered to take me to the mall to do some shopping but I declined. Someone would probably end up recognizing me and would make a scene, probably ask about Harry as well. I barely made it through a whole day of school, I doubt I would be able to answer questions about Harry without breaking down. So instead I spent the day catching up on all the assignments I missed so I wouldn't be so behind. Towards the end of the day, I had the urge to call Harry so I did. I had no idea what I would say if he answered, so I prepared for the worst. But I didn't have to worry about that since it went straight to voicemail again. This time I didn't leave a message, I already left one embarrassing one and he doesn't need to hear another one. By the end of the seventh day, I was pretty convinced things were over between Harry and I. He would have at least sent me a text if he truly wanted us to work, but obviously he didn't. Instead of crying or breaking things and screaming, I ate ice cream and watched stupid soap operas before I eventually fell asleep on the sofa.

The eighth day was the best out of the rest, probably because I finally accepted that things were over and I had to move on like I did last time. But that's harder than it sounds. I actually got ready on the eighth day: shower, makeup, clean clothes. The whole deal. I ate a decent breakfast and held a conversation with my mum before she went to work again. I felt like things were as close to normal as they could possibly get, considering the circumstances. I smiled that day and laughed for the first time in over a week, and it felt good.

But not as good as it would feel if Harry was here.

*****

Harry's P.O.V ~

Eight days.

Eight days since Addison left and the last time I spoke to her. Probably the longest eight days of my life. I wanted to call her the second I knew she would have gotten home, but something in me told me not to, told me it was too soon.

And eventually "too soon" turned into "too late."

The first day was shit. I stayed in my hotel room, pacing back and forth just waiting for her to text me or call me or fuck, anything. I just wanted to hear her voice, even if she was yelling at me. My hand was still fucked up and now it was starting to hurt like hell. I took aspirin to help with the pain and it helped my hand, but not my heart. We had a show that night and I managed to make it through with my bum hand, even though it got annoying after a while. Towards the end of the show, I looked out to the crowd and saw the faces of fans that were screaming our names and crying as we sang. When the show ended, we got back to our dressing room and the first thing I did was punch the closest wall to me with my good hand after I realized the one person that I wanted in the crowd wasn't there. The lads had to hold me back so I wouldn't try to break anything else, but one punch was all I needed that day.

The second day I stayed in my room the whole time. We didn't have any shows or interviews, so while the lads went out I laid in my bed all day. I sent out a couple tweets so the fans wouldn't get suspicious, but I still saw some people asking if Addison and I were still together or if something happened. Some of their theories were so far from the truth, like one of us was unfaithful which was insane. I quickly got off the site and continued to lay in my bed and stare at the ceiling all day. Liam came in once and asked if I wanted to go out with them, but I said no. I wasn't in any mood to pretend that I was alright when I'm really not. At one point, I grabbed my phone and started to text Addison.

Hey.. I just wanted to make sure you landed ok.

I was about to hit send, when I thought about it and she would probably get mad that I text her and didn't call so I quickly erased the words and put my phone far enough away from me so that I wouldn't be tempted to do that again.

It's too soon, I kept telling myself.

The third day was fucking terrible. That was probably my worst day. I woke up that morning with a pit in my stomach and my hand was hurting more than usual. I took a couple aspirin and ignored the lads before I went back into my room. Instead of laying down, I started pacing back and forth as thoughts of Addison ran through my mind. Her big brown eyes, the way she laughs at my stupid jokes, the small dimple that appears on her cheek when she's genuinely smiling, the way she pulls her hair behind her ear like it's nothing. I miss fucking everything about her, and I doubt she even misses me at all. I was angry, angrier than I've been in a while. I looked over at the brand new mirror they put in my room and without thinking, I walked over to it and punched it with my good hand. The glass fell to my feet and I stood there frozen in place as blood dripped from my hand. I heard my door fly open and four sets of footsteps run over to me as their voices were muffled and I couldn't understand what they were saying. They somehow got me to sit on the edge of my bed as Liam cursed and yelled at someone to get the first aid kit.

"For fuck's sake Harry, just call her already." I heard him say as he started to take the shards of glass out of my hand. That was when I lost it. I started crying like a fucking baby and I tried to get up so I could take my anger and frustration out on something, but Liam and Niall managed to hold me down as I cried my fucking eyes out. Louis came back with the first aid kit and the lads fixed my hand and wrapped it up so it matched the other one.

"You're lucky you don't have to get fucking stitches mate." Zayn muttered under his breath before he pat my back and left with the others. I continued to cry and I couldn't stop fucking crying. I thought about calling Addison, so I grabbed my phone and stared at it before I felt another rush of adrenaline and I chucked my phone at the wall, causing it to break and shatter on the floor. There goes the idea of calling.

The fourth day was spent on the tour bus since we were moving on to the next city that's on our list. I barely woke up by the time we had to go, so I threw on a clean pair of clothes and got my shit together so I wouldn't be so late. I walked out of the hotel with the lads with my sunglasses on so no one could see the dark bags under my eyes due to barely sleeping an hour the night before. All of us got on the bus and I immediately jumped into my bunk and put my headphones in so I could drown everyone and everything out. I just wanted to go one minute without Addison's face popping into my head or her laugh ringing through my mind. Since I broke my phone, I haven't had the chance to buy another one. The whole day I kept thinking, what if she's calling me right now? What if she finally text me? But I knew deep down she wasn't, so I spent that day worrying and ignoring everyone else.

We arrived to the next city early in the morning on the fifth day so all of us were pretty tired and annoyed already. This hotel wasn't as big as the others, so we had to pair up to share a room. Zayn volunteered to stay with me, probably so someone could watch me and make sure I don't do anything stupid. Niall, Liam and Louis took the three bed hotel room. I guessed they drew straws before, and Zayn got the short one. Zayn and I picked our beds and quickly said goodnight once we got settled in since we had shit to do later today, including an interview and a show that night. It would be the first interview since Addison left, and I knew they would ask about her. I just had to prepare myself so I wouldn't flip out like I've been doing lately.

I woke up a couple hours later to Zayn shaking my shoulder and telling me to wake up or he'll pour cold water on me, so I immediately got up and threw on clean clothes before I joined the others who were waiting for me in the hallway. We left the hotel and were on our way to this interview that I wasn't looking forward to. Once we got there, they prepped us so we didn't look so tired and we sat down in the chairs they provided as we waited for the interviewer. The interviewer came in a couple minutes later and she was a nice looking blonde, but I didn't really care. She started off by asking the basics, like how the tour is going and what we miss about home. The ones we get asked all the time. But then she moved on to the girlfriend questions. She asked Liam about Natalie, and of course he was vague about it since they aren't "official." She then asked Louis and Zayn about Perrie and Eleanor before she got around to me.

"So how are you and Addison, Harry? There have been some rumors flying around about you two lately." She said.

"We're fine." I said and tried my best to smile.

"Really? Well it seems like-" She started to say but I cut her off.

"I said we're fine." I said more coldly, earning an elbow to the side from Liam. The girl's smile fell before she plastered on a fake one and didn't ask me anymore questions.

We left the interview and the lads yelled at me for being rude, but again I didn't care. From the interview we went straight to the arena so we could prepare for the show and do soundcheck and meet and greets. I managed to get through the pre show shit without yelling at anyone or punching anything so I counted it as a success. Then came the show. I actually had a fun time on stage, I usually do. It helped me get my mind off of Addison for a couple hours and actually have a decent time with the lads. But once the show was over, I went back to feeling like shit. Once we got back to the hotel, I quickly got into my bed and tried to fall asleep.

The sixth day was the first day I woke up feeling refreshed. I managed to sleep through the night without any nightmares or Addison popping into my head. We had another show that night so we spent the majority of the day prepping and messing around like we usually do so that day was pretty much a blur.

I remember the seventh day, since it was our day off so we did whatever we wanted to do. So I decided to get out of the hotel and go out, so I dragged Niall to a bar nearby. I spent the majority of the day drinking and playing pool, trying to get my mind off of Addison. It was getting dark outside and Niall really wanted to leave, and I was about to go with him when I heard a girl scream my name from behind me. I turned around to see a tall blonde girl with blue-green eyes coming over to me with open arms.

Cara Delevingne.

We hooked up a couple times, but we were more friends than anything else.

"Hey Cara." I said as she pulled me into a hug.

"Hey stranger. What are you doing here?" She asked as she waved to Niall.

"We have a couple shows here. What about you?"

"Visiting family." She smiled before she offered to buy us a drink. Niall refused but I agreed, so Niall went back to the car after I reassured him I would find my own way back to the hotel.

"So how have you been?" She asked me as the bartender brought us our drinks.

"Hanging in there. You?" I asked as I chugged the small drink.

"Better than you have apparently." She joked and I couldn't help but laugh.

I spent a couple hours there with Cara drinking, and soon enough I was pretty hammered and had no clue what the fuck I was doing.

I woke up on the eighth morning with a pounding headache and I smelled like alcohol. I sat up and noticed my surroundings, realizing I wasn't in my hotel room. I looked down and saw that I was only in my boxers and my other clothes were on the floor next to me. Where the hell was I? I got up from the bed and didn't bother putting any more clothing on as I wandered around the house. I found the kitchen and saw a blonde sitting at the table drinking a cup of coffee and reading a magazine. Cara? Oh shit, shit, shit, shit, I thought to myself as I slowly walked over to her and tried to remember what happened last night.

"Oh look, you're awake." Cara smiled up at me.

"Uh, yeah. I'm awake." I said cautiously as I crossed my arms to try to cover myself.

"Did uh.. did anything happen last night?" I asked, terrified of the answer. Cara looked up at me with a confused look before she realized what I was asking and started to laugh.

"Oh God no! You were so drunk off your ass that I couldn't let you go off by yourself. So I brought you here. So no, nothing happened Harry." She reassured me. Thank God. That was the last thing I needed on top of everything else.

"I know you love her too much to do that to her, Harry." Cara added. I just nodded and went back into the bedroom to change back into my clothes before I went back into the kitchen.

"Can I use your phone? Mine kind of.. broke." I asked her. Cara nodded and handed me her cell phone and I called Louis.

"Hello?" Louis asked, sounding like he just woke up.

"Hey, it's Harry. Look, I'm at Cara's place and-" I started to say but Louis cut me off.

"Cara's?! Harry what the fuck were you thinking?!" He yelled, thinking the worst.

"Shut up Louis! Nothing happened! I was just drunk and she let me crash here. But I don't know how to get back to the hotel so can you come and get me? I'll text you the address." I told him.

"Fine. I'll be there soon." Louis said before he hung up. I immediately text him the address and he showed up about ten minutes later. I thanked Cara for being so nice and walked out the front door to be met by a handful of paparazzi who were snapping a million pictures.

"Why did you spend the night at Cara's, Harry?"

"Did you sleep with her?"

"Did you cheat on Addison?"

I tried my best to resist the urge to punch all of them as I climbed into the car with Louis. He didn't say anything about halfway through the ride until he finally broke the silence.

"You know she won't believe you, you know that right?" He asked, referring to Addison when she sees the pictures of me leaving Cara's.

"I know, I know." I muttered and pushed my hair out of my face.

This was just the cherry on top of the hell sundae that's been my week.

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AN: I know this chapter is depressing.. I'm sorry! But I hope you liked it :)

Comment what you think Addison's reaction will be when she finds the pictures of Harry leaving Cara's!

Please comment & vote!

Next update on Wednesday!