LABELLED: Tormentor || LRH

Part Two.

 Waking up, I felt someone messing with my hair I opened my eyes and saw my mother sitting beside me on my bed. I must have tired myself out by crying and looking at my phone. "You okay sweetie?" My mother asks me, I just look at her.

I shake my head at her, she sighs. "I'm sorry that was stupid of me to ask," she said in sympathy. She continued to run her fingers through my hair, I just let her. I couldn't tell her to stop not when it was slightly comforting.

"Where's my phone mum?" I ask her, she just looked at me. "Luke you don't need your phone dear," she said to me, I shook my head. I sat up, my mum's arm dropping to the bed because I moved. "I need it, mum," I say getting up off my bed and starting to look for it.

"Luke I think it will be best for you not to have it for a couple days," my mother said. I shook my head in disagreement. "No, you don't understand I need it," I say running my hand through my hair getting frustrated. "Luke you're  working yourself up again." I hear my mother say. I began looking through some of my drawers in my room searching for my phone, looking to see where my mum had hidden it. "I don't care, I need my phone Mum. I need to see her alright, I need my phone to do that" I say as I searched.

I felt her hands on either side of my shoulders. "Luke," my mother says in a calm and caring voice. I turned to look at her, she just looked at me in sympathy yet again, for the last two to three months I've seen the same look on her face. The look of sympathy. I don't need sympathy not when it was my fault.

"I think dear, not having your phone for a couple days will do you good. Look at you, you're making yourself upset and tormenting yourself by looking at the pictures" she said, I shook my head disagreeing. "I'm not tormenting myself," I say lying through my teeth. "Luke I'm your mother, I know when your lying and me and your brothers have seen you doing it too. You can't keep doing it, it's not going to help you it's going to make it worse. Yn's not going to come back"

"get out!" I raise my voice at her. My mother's face soon fell to the realisation of what she had just said. "Luke I didn't mean to say that" "just get out," I say shouting loudly and pointing to the door.

My mother nodded her head and walked to the door, "I didn't mean to upset you Luke but the sooner you realise she's not coming back the better dear, the quicker you can move on. Tormenting yourself isn't going to bring her back" My mother said before leaving my room. I ran to the door closing it shut and putting the lock on.

I couldn't believe my own mother said I should get over her. She's not coming back! That's not going to help me right now, it will make it worse. Not having my phone isn't going to help either. I needed to get out of the house and I looked towards the window and that's when I knew, the window was my way out of the house. I quickly put on my black converses and put one of my hoodies over my head and walked over to the window.

I found myself walking around the streets with my hoodie over my head and hands in my pockets. I didn't know where I was going specifically but my feet was taking me on a journey. I ended up at the park at one stage, I stood leaning against one of the trees watching some children who were playing on the swings. I and Yn did that, played on the swings together acting like the silly children we were inside. One of the memories we had together, one of the memories I now HAD left of her.

Seeing the children happily smiling and having no care in the word made me smile for a second at least their lives were great. The smile soon disappeared from my lips as everything came back to me. 

I left the park and started walking again, I walked past many different shops and found myself walking on the street, the street I had avoided for two to three months now. Her street, Yn's street. Not today, I was walking along it, taking each individual step till I stopped, stopping in front of her house.

The house that no longer belonged to her, the house where four people who were related to her lived but not yn she wasn't there. The house was a home but not anymore, it stopped being home the day yn didn't come back. It's not a family home anymore, a house where people are missing a loved one. I hadn't spoken to yn's parents or her cousin Sammy since she's been gone, I couldn't face them and I didn't even know what I would say to them, I'm sorry? How could I say that when I caused it!

I did what I thought was best and turned back around and continued to walk away from the house hoping to walk away unnoticed.

"Luke!" I heard the voice, the voice of the little girl belonging to Yn's little sister, Angie. I wanted to walk away, but I couldn't I turned back around and saw her running towards me. I just watched as she got closer to me, seeing her reminded me so much of her older sister.

"Luke I missed you," Angie said I leant down onto my knees and she came running into me, hugging me. I hugged her back. I closed my eyes to stop the tears, she reminded me so much of yn. She looked like her.

I opened my eyes and she looked at me, eyes full of concern. "Lukey why are you crying?" She asks battering her little eyelashes at me. " i-i" I couldn't find the words to say. "lukey doesn't cry!" She said as she looked at me. "I- I just missed you," I say to her. She smiled up at me. "I missed you and so did yn," she said happily. I looked down at her, she didn't understand at all what's happened, that made me feel ten times worse as it's my fault she doesn't have her older sister anymore. My fault I took her sister away.