Hurt Me No Longer (Sequel to "Bully Me No More")

14

*ROC*

I waited impatiently for Rain's dad to show up and I felt a huge wave of relief when I saw him dragging a suitcase.

"August!" He greeted me.

"Hi Mr.Meely."

"Oh no son, not now, Call me Chris."

I smiled at him. "Ok...Chris."

"Atta boy" He said, patting my back.

"Ready to go?" I asked.

"Mhmm."

The traffic to get home was awful and we found ourselves making small talk.

"How is Rain? You two ok? Last time she visited she was upset at you. Why?"

I gripped the steering wheel tighter, hoping he wouldn't notice. I took a deep breath and then loosened my grip.

"No offense sir, but that was personal."

"No no, I get it. No marriage is perfect right!?" He laughed.

"That's right sir."

But most marriages don't include alcohol abuse, physical abuse, and random periods of separation.

"So is she big?" He asked.

I snapped out of my trip down memory lane and came back to reality.

"I'm sorry...what?"

"Rain. Is she big? Her stomach."

I smiled, imagining Rain rubbing her large baby bump.

"Mhhm. Big and beautiful." I smiled to myself.

"That's great to hear. Ya know she was pretty broken after her miscarriage."

I flinched at his words, staring hard at the car in front of us in hopes that it would move.

"No. We never really talk about it, it hurts us both."

"Damn. I'm sorry. But Rain...it was like she was gone, her smiles were painful to see, her laughs were all forced. She had this gloomy look in her eyes for months, she must have been going through a lot."

Yeah...like being pushed down stairs, being slapped, and kicked in her stomach by the man who supposedly loved her.

"Mhhm. I'm sure."

"I'm sorry. I can see this topic bothers you."

I bit my bottom lip and nodded. "Yeah a little."

The rest of the long, painful drive he was quiet and the radio was the only source of noise in the car. When he walked into our bedroom Rain literally ran to him.

"Daddy!" she exclaimed.

"Hi princess!"

They hugged tightly and tears formed in her eyes.

"I'm ganna just go start lunch."

She nodded awkwardly while they were still hugging and I ran down stairs to season the shrimp. While it fried in the pan I sat at the dinning table with my head down. The way that Chris was describing Rain in the car...was just awful to imagine. I'm sure it all wasn't her feelings about the miscarriage, it must have also been mixed with the feelings of me physically abusing her and neglecting her emotionally.

I was so excited for our baby girl, I needed to have her, I needed something that was mine that I could look at and know that I never hurt it, or took it forgranted like I did with Rain. I knew Rain was happy, and thankful that her pregnancy was on the right track, but I knew it couldn't compare to the happiness I felt. The baby was my new start, her birth was ganna be god telling me "Here. I know you screwed up, but here's a second chance because I know you can do it."

I started to think about Justin and how part of me...deep down inside had wished Rain did sleep with him. The kiss upset me, but it was just a stab in the back, if they slept together it would 've been the twisting of the knife. I deserved that. I deserved that kind of pain, everytime I promised Rain I wouldn't drink was a stab in HER back, but each time I broke that promise must have been like a 360 twist.

"Roc!" Rain yelled, sucking me back into the real world.

I looked at where she was pointing to see the shrimp on fire. I grabbed our fire extinguisher and put out the fire, seeing the small black clumps left in the frying pan.

Rain laughed. "My dad left to get me pickles. What the hell were you doing?"

I stared at the burnt shrimp and shook my head. "I don't know." I mumbled. "I don't know."

I felt her eyes on me, but I didn't wanna meet her gaze. She opened the back door to let out the smoke and grabbed my hand, leading me to the living room. She sat next to me on a couch and I still tried to avoid eye contact. I felt the stinging sensation of my building tears. Rain grabbed my chin and turned my head, forcing me to look at her.

"Baby. What's wrong?" She asked.

"Why. Why didn't you sleep with Justin?"

She sighed. "We already went over this. Because I love you Roc, I'm having your baby, and I'm your wife."

I couldn't think of anything to say so I stayed quiet.

"Kiss me." She said in a demanding tone.

"Huh?" I felt disoriented.

"If you love me then kiss me."

"Are you serious?"

"Serious as a heart attack."

I leaned forward and put my palm on her cheek.

"I love you more than air." I whispered.

I felt electricity when our lips touched, I stroked her face gently while her fingers played in my hair. By far it was the best kiss we ever shared. She pulled away giggling.

"C'mon, help me cook some more shrimp."

"Ok...hold on."

"What's wrong?"

I kissed her again, more rushed and passionate.

"I needed to do that."

She smiled from ear to ear as she brushed her bangs from her face and looked down. I still knew how to make her get shy, just like in High school.

"Oh, ok." She mumbled.

We held hands on our way back to the kitchen, where we made more shrimp without any need for the fire extinguisher.