Two Of A Kind || Lee Heeseung

54 ¦ Leave Me Alone

My mother offered the next morning that I could stay home, but I refused because I felt that would give Heeseung and Jay their satisfaction of having won. 

So that Wednesday, I struggled to get out of bed. I felt like instead of my flu, I now had a new depressing weight on my shoulders and when I looked in the mirror, I almost recoiled. 

Although I had fallen asleep quickly because crying makes you so tired, I had deep dark circles under my eyes and my face was red. So I slapped a whole load of concealer on my face, but even that had a hard time hiding my exhaustion. 

My mother was already at work, and since I couldn't very well go with Heeseung, I had arranged the previous evening for Riki to pick me up. He came a little early to avoid a possible run-in with Heeseung, and I couldn't express my gratitude enough for his news.

"How are you?" Riki asked anxiously as he drove off, and I tried a weak smile, which failed miserably. I therefore contented myself with just a smile. Riki gave me a look from the side, but I avoided him. 

"Hey," he put a hand on my knee,"You know it would be okay if you weren't okay too, right?" I nodded again, tears welling up in my eyes. Again... I would have loved to slap myself for crying. 

I took one deep breath before speaking. "Yeah, I know, but I think I need to deal with this on my own for a bit before I can really talk about it." My voice trembled. "After letting it all out yesterday, I need some time first." Riki nodded beside me. 

We had almost arrived at the school. "Sooo-" He exclaimed emphatically cheerful and changed the subject "Are you ready for school?" I groaned "Don't give me that, maybe I should have stayed home after all, but the idea of him-" I broke off when I realized I was drifting in the wrong direction again. 

Riki acted unconcerned. "What subjects do you have today?" "Preferably none at all." "Not a single one you're looking forward to?" "Well, yes. Literature is just fine." But then I remembered something and laughed bitterly, "But I got that together with Heeseung." 

Riki's worried look didn't escape me. I appreciated him trying to distract me, but my mind just automatically drifted back to him. I didn't even want to, but I couldn't help it either. And when we pulled into the parking lot and Heeseung was already leaning against the wall with Jay and the other guys, I finally lost my cool and the atmosphere around me changed abruptly. 

Heeseung's car had still been parked in front of the garage when we left, but the motorcycle next to him, explained the situation. As Riki pulled up further back, even though the front parking spaces were all empty, we stayed in the car for a moment. 

Nervously, I chewed on my lower lip and stared out the windshield. "Do you think... I mean do you think..." I started, then broke off. "You mean do I think he likes you after all?" I nodded. 

Riki unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned over to me "Clara, I do think Heeseung liked you. I don't know how far that affection went, but it's clear he doesn't care about you as much as he claims. However, I can't tell you why he acted that way and why he threw those things at you. I don't understand it, but if he doesn't want you, then he doesn't deserve you." He looked serious.