The Demon Wolf

Chapter 45

Sebastian had no idea what had gone through his head. All he could remember was his mate's plea to sleep with him. And the pain in his heart

There had been nothing remarkable about that evening, nothing out of the ordinary except going home and finding his mate packing his belongings. And then they slept together.

As stupid as it sounded, it had happened .

It happened and Sebastian cannot understand anything anymore. Just a day ago he thought that he could only love Kevin but now. He felt as if he could anything and everything for Stefan. Just to make his pain stop. Just to see him smile again.

All this time, all these years Stefan stood by him and Sebastian took everything for granted. The thought made him overwhelmed with guilt. There was a time, very early into their Bonding, where he did think about Stefan, he came to care for him. Even if he said that it meant nothing to him - it had been important to him for a long time. It was only natural to remember everything. He spent years taking comfort in his mate, in the closeness and safety, and the relief it offered. Even these past few months he used to get these phantom sensations of their time together, used to see flashing images of what Stefan looked like gasping and on the verge of being undone. It was something he thought of fondly though, nothing he actively reminisced but he always felt that Stefan will be with him forever. And he choose to believe it and continued hurting his mate.

He took Stefan's warmth as permanent and choose to continue loving Kevin. To be honest there was never a percent of possibility that Kevin would look at him. But he continued to hold onto the painful feelings and left Stefan to realise his infedilious thoughts.

But he was actually a bit surprised how little effort it took to cast Stefan aside and dwell mentally on this aspect of his relationship with Kevin that had never even existed in first place.

Then again falling in love with Kevin was like nothing like realising his mate's pain.

It felt like being struck by lightning burning him, painfully, overwhelming and suffocating.

Sebastian had resigned himself to this bond of convenience when he fell for Kevin, something he dreaded and abhorred in equal measure.

What he got instead was a Stefan. Kevin's little brother. Someone he had known since he was child. Stefan was everything that someone desired in a mate. And he left it all to run after a fruitless love.

And it will forever be his greatest regret that he apparently took it all for granted. And atlast Stefan choose to let go. He had already seen it coming. Hadn't he? And no one else was to blame but him.

With a sigh he looks down at the stack of papers in front of him and reads about the new recruits in his team. Stefan had handed them to him this morning. Stefan had apparently asked him to look at them and decide where to appoint them. They were foxes and coyotes from the allied Packs. Meant for adjoining the security forces.

Goddess, there are still hours of the work left and his desk is all but buried under paperwork. A day before he would have thrown them away thinking only about the coup. But now he couldn't do it. Stefan was so involved with the settlement and with the Demon. If the coup were to happen he would be crushed.

But as he much as his guilt ate him, he couldn't do anything. Couldn't save everyone. But he wanted to do something. Anything for Stefan to be happy again. He even wanted Stefan with him and even the clusterfuck their relationship has become.

Their relationship, even in its early stages, hasn't been this strained, this was his doing. And its completely understandable that Stefan wants to leave him but it hurts all the same.