✓ laundry boy | yang jungwon

49: page three

i slowly close the journal once again, taking a break since i couldn't handle the tight feeling in my chest.

if i continued to read more, i bet it would worsen because of how much i was yearning for him.

i put my hand against my heart as i stared off the distance. my hair flew with the wind in rhythm.

i forced a smile on my face, hoping it'd magically make me happy.

it didn't work, of course.

the sky was dark enough for me to see the stars slowly showing up one by one.

if you did leave me, are you up there now?

i didn't want to believe it, but if so,

you looked very beautiful.

you're the only light i see right now.

i still don't want to think you're gone...

maybe you'll call me weird again, but i'll keep relying on hope, jungwon.

hope, will bring us our next time's.

★

jungwon to hisano
-three-

i got in a fight with one of my doctors here.

i don't think i should tell you why.

i mean, it's too soon, isn't it?

ah, whatever. i guess i'll just tell you.

they asked me if i could accept, taking the heart of someone else's.

they didn't exactlyyy say that, but they asked me,

"if you decide to refuse, we'll give it to someone who's been waiting their whole life for it."

how do they expect me to say yes after that?

nothing seems to work for me. i don't think we'll get out of this peacefully either way.

i'll write down some of my memories, of you and i.

if i can.

the things i felt, and wanted.

the stuff i was waiting to experience.

i'm sorry if it's long.

i felt myself laughing, as if he was actually speaking to me. these tears couldn't be stopped no matter what, huh?

yang jungwon, you make me cry.

how am i supposed to prepare myself for this?

how was i supposed to prepare myself for all of this?

i wish i knew earlier.

i remember when i kissed you underwater.

that felt weird, didn't it?

i bet you wondered if friends could do those kinds of things.

and i'll tell you now, friends don't.

and friends don't usually marry each other...

i don't think we could've made that promise possible in the first place.