Rewinding Time (Narry)

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Guess who's on Spring Break? That's right haha! Since I've been neglecting my stories, I'm trying to get as much writing done as possible before school is back up again. Fun fact: I'm vacationing with my cousins for the first half of break; of course, this means, I'm currently sitting in a pitched black hotel room, writing fanfiction LOL. Definitely living the life here. 

Sending hugs and kisses (virally, of course) your way! I hope you guys all have a fantastic day and thank you, as always, for reading and supporting!

⌛ ⌛ ⌛

❝HARRY❞

It had been several days now since Niall and Zayn had disappeared right in front of my eyes; I had spent the first couple of days trying to make sense of what had happened.

The third day hit me the hardest; that was the unsettling day when their disappearance was confirmed. I became an utter mess. Tables were turned, curtains were torn, books were shredded, and my chest felt like it had been ripped open. I wanted to see Niall. I needed to see Niall.

The past few nights were spent restlessly; as if spending my days thinking about him wasn't enough, my nights were spent in the same exact way. Whenever my mind would finally allow my body to rest, my dreams were dominated by him as well—all of which that often ended up consisting of him falling into a pit of endless darkness to uncertain death. It was a never-ending cycle, one that was neither pleasant nor desirable. 

It bothered me greatly because I didn't want to spend my every waking moment thinking about him. On the day that Niall had run away and gone missing, I had done some heavy reflections on how I truly felt about him.

The experiences we shared, from every kiss and every touch. He made me feel like nobody else ever could; for the first time in my life, I understood what it was like to yearn for someone who was just out of reach. Not having him here caused some sort of aching, one that I could not simply shake off. At least when he was here, he was in my presence and aware of my existence. At least I was a part of his life.

Not knowing where he was or what he was doing killed me. Even more so, by the time I finally realized how much I liked him, how much I actually loved him, it was much too late.

I rested my head against the windowsill and sighed. My eyes were sore and tired from all of the crying I had done over the past couple of days; I was always relatively good at hiding my emotions, but losing Niall was just too much. There were simply some things that I could just not hide.  

He was the only one who had been able to break down my walls; he had filled up that vacant space with his empty promises of forever. Now that he was gone, it was almost as if my entire castle had crumbled and there was nothing I could do about it.

He had become my cornerstone, a part of the very foundation that I had built the new me upon. He was the one who insisted I be more caring and open to those around me. Unfortunately, he was also the one who single-handedly proved why my prior ways were much more operative.

Time and time again I had let people in; time and time again, they had left, leaving a hole in my heart as well as they went on their way.

Despite of that, I knew that I was in the wrong when it came to Niall. I always took him for granted; I figured that he would always be by my side so I mistreated him. I only ever thought about myself. If only I had not pushed him over the edge.

I pressed my fingers to my lips and began tugging my bottom lip subconsciously as I glanced out the window at the looming grey, gloomy clouds above. Since the night that Niall and Zayn disappeared, it had been raining nonstop; it was no longer cold enough to snow, but that didn't stop the sky from crying. As if my mood wasn't already absolutely miserable to begin with, it was almost as if the whole entire world was mocking every ounce of my existence.