"Baby.." Alex whispered making me wake up
"Yes?" I asked confused and I looked at him just to see him sleeping
I chuckled and removed his hand from my stomach and got up but suddenly fell back as my legs were completely numb. I giggled and threw Alex's shirt over me as I stood up slowly and walked over to one of my luggages. I grabbed the small white container and walked back to the bed.
I took 2 pils and swallowed them and turned around to see that Alex was staring at me.
"Morning" I smiled but Alex was still focused on the small box in my hands and I quickly covered it
"What's that?" Alex asked and I widened my eyes
"N..Nothing" I lied
"For fucks sake just tell me!" Alex said and I sighed
"Antidepressants.." I whispered and looked down at my thighs
"What?" Alex asked quietly
"An..Alex.. I'm.."
"God Becca!" Alex sighed and quickly hugged me from behind
"I'm sorry" I said quietly
"Shh.. It's ok... Just come here baby" Alex said quietly and patted on his part of the bed
I lied down next to him and we were both staring in each other's eyes.
"I fucked it up badly, didn't I?" Alex sighed and I shook my head
"No,no.. Don't blame yourself Al"
"They aren't good for you baby" Alex whispered and I nodded, moving myself as I sat on the edge of the bed now
"Oh but heroin is better, right?" I snapped at him and Alex moved his gaze to the white silky duvet
"You don't know how-"
"Oh I don't know how you felt? Alex, I almost died using that!" I shouted
"I was seventeen.." I said quietly before I started crying
"Carmen.." Alex whispered and I nodded
"Alex I can't lose you just because you are fucking stupid!" I said and walked over to the big window wall
"I'll stop.. I promise" Alex whispered from behind me and I turned to look at him
I silvered my hands around his waist and hugged him tightly. He didn't hesitated to place his hands around my back.
"I hate you Alex" I whispered and looked up at him
"If you hate me, then why are your hands around my waist?" Alex asked and I rolled my eyes
"But I hate you too" Alex whispered back, smiling softly
"Why?" I asked
"Because you love me" Alex smiled
"There's no one else for me Alex" I whispered and I moved my hands around his neck, pulling him in a kiss
"We are a mess" Alex chuckled and pulled away from the kiss
"I don't hate you, but I hate the way I love you so much" I groaned and placed my forehead against his chest
"I love you more than life" Alex said as he pecked my head
"You shouldn't love anything more than life" I said biting my bottom lip
