Metanoia: A Change of Heart

Chapter XXVIII ~ Thonia

Ten Ways on How to Move On

#1. Cool down

Emotions can blind one's decision and ideas. Take a short time locking yourself in a close room and consider what happened and what you've done wrong as well. Close your eyes and ease the pain. Remove the hatred and fear of losing him/her.

#2. Crying is not prohibited, but highly recommended.

Crying flushes your feelings and releases unwanted burden, sometimes. It's okay to cry, just be sure to wipe the tears later and smile. As what the song stated, "There's always a rainbow after the rain."

#3. Get the proper closure.

Stop talking about him/her, but it doesn't necessarily means you can't talk to him/her.

Conversation is a powerful tool to make things better. What if the tragic ending you thought is just the conflict, the climax of your happily ever after? God is a talented author who makes a lot of plot twists.

#4. Acceptance Part 1

After step number three, you'll get one of the two answers; either you will continue to the resolution, or get the denoument.

But if it was the latter way, ACCEPT. Accept and accept even if it's painful and seemed surreal. The only way to move to the next step is acceptance.

#5. Keep in a box.

Thoughts are usually more painful than the real and physical pain. You shouldn't hurt yourself. Start imagining more beautiful things.

Yes, you can't erase him/her in your mind but atleast you can store the past memories in a box and keep it in the farthest corner of your mind. (Be mindful of Step #1 and #2.)

#6. Don't plant two graves

A wise man once said that if you plot revenge, plant two graves. One for the person you want to give vengeance and the other for yourself. Plotting revenge can make matters worse. It can ruin more of you and can change your perceptions.

It is also a violation to the previous steps. If ever you thought about it, repeat from step #4.

#7. No rebound!

Same with step #6, it will only make matters worse. Why will you involve another innocent life in your pain? It takes time, always takes time to heal, sometimes, longer than we expected.

Stop abusing other people's kindness to the point where you're just playing with their feelings and end up hurting them and yourself.

#8. Try and try.

Try and try but not to the ideal 'success'. You might think the success you're aiming for is different from the success talking about in this list.

The success here is the freedom of one's heart, of one's mind. You can repeat the steps as much as you like but don't be stuck in this stage. You have to consider that there are still next.

Try and try until you succeed!

#9. Acceptance part two

If you tried and still no resolution, you better think twice. Maybe it was time to stop. Sometimes, the only way to move on is to think there will be a better story with someone else, the one with the happy ending.

Just trust and believe. As I've said, God makes a lot of plot twists. The person for you might already be in the process of meeting you. At the right place, in the right time.

#10. Start now

Not tomorrow, not the other day. NOW. Right after you read this, you have to start. The first step is usually the hardest in every journey. Just have faith. Pray that you will succeed.

Choose to start now! Don't waste time crying or sitting in the corner. There's nothing wrong with crying but don't cry so much or else it will lose its value. (ref. Step #2) Wipe the tears and stand up!