⋰˚☆ Red Carpet
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⋰˚☆ Performance
Intro, Gotta Go + VCR, Dance Break, Snapping
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⋰˚☆
Fai performed a fourteen-minute segment for her MMA performance, it was the longest she had ever performed in an award show and she was even happier knowing that she opened the show.
After Fai completed her performance, she quickly got changed back to her red carpet dress and went to the artist area, where all the artists were seated to watch the show. The area was split into two sections, the section Fai was assigned was with her label mates. BTS were sat in the front row and Fai had to share the second row with TxT. However, at the moment, BTS were not sat on their seats as they went backstage since they received yet an other award.
They were over an hour into the award show, at that time Fai had already won best dance award for the female category, TxT won rookie male artist of the year and the group performed as well. Fai couldn't have been any more proud of them, especially after the performance they gave.
"Noona it's cold, can you share your blanket with us?" Taehyun asked.
"Please." Soobin pouted, Fai rose her eyebrow at Soobin, she wasn't into the aegyo.
"I'm sat on the edge, I don't think my blanket will be able to spread over all of you." Fai said.
"Come sit in the middle, I'll sacrifice my seat for you," Huening Kai dramatically said, standing up. Fai stood up and the two of them quickly switched seats.
"Noona," Beomgyu spoke up, "I'm still cold, do you have any heat packs?"
"I only have one and it's for me to use," Fai muttered.
"Sharing is caring you know."
"Do I look like your mom? Go get one yourself!"
Beomgyu huffed, Yeonjun shook his head at Fai, "Tsk tsk tsk, he's going to get really sulky now."
Fai shrugged, "Don't really care to be honest."
Tonight there were only two things that Fai cared about, one being her performance which went incredibly well, the other being a certain Daesang she had her eye on. Song of The Year, Gotta Go has charted incredibly well the past year especially on Melon, not dropping below the top 20 since its release in January and being the most listened to idol song of 2019.
"I'm sorry, but the six of you are needed backstage." The producer told the six.
Fai and the TxT members stood up and followed the producers backstage, Fai and TxT individually had to film a thank you video for 1theK. The process was long and Fai found it ridiculous if anyone she should be thanking the people who voted for the award, not a random distribution company. Afterwards, Fai had to go get touchups, Fai's hair had gotten a bit messy and they needed to reapply Fai's lip products. After the touchups, Fai had to film a small portion for her Behind which would be uploaded to her channel.
After Fai was done, she made sure to get 12 heat packs and walked back to the stage to watch the rest of the show.
"Fai-yah!" Someone called.
Fai stopped in her tracks waiting for her senior to catch up to her, "Hey, Oppa."
"You performed well today Fai," Taehyung smiled.
"Thank you!" Fai smiled back to him as the two continued to walk back to the stage. "Do you think Mamamoo finished performing."
"Yes they did, were you waiting for them?"
Fai sighed, "I really wanted to see them."
Taehyung caressed Fai's hair, "You'll be able to see them at Mama."
"I know but...I was anticipating them."
"Fuck, that sucks."
"I know. But you're right, overall there are more opportunities to see them and I can just watch it online later."
"That's right, think more positively." Taehyung nodded, "Now about your performance, you did well but..."
Taehyung went giving Fai some feedback, both positive and negative. Fai appreciated the feedback a lot, she begs for criticism as she wants to know exactly what she needs to work on. The two went up the stairs and walked over to their seats. Fai stood in front of the BTS members and handed them 7 heat packs.
"Woahh!"Jin exclaimed, "You're an angel sent from god. I was just about to go back and get some heat packs. Thank you so much."
"Thanks, Fai!" Yoongi smiled.
she went back to her seat in between the TXT, handing the 5 others heat-packs. Taehyun spoke up, "Noona, blanket please."
Fai sighed and spread her blanket between the fix other guys.
"Fai, we ran out of conditioner in the dorm. Can we borrow yours?" Yeonjun asked.
"You guys take too much advantage of us being neighbours."
Soobin spoke up, "You eat all of our food, the least you can do is give us your conditioner."
"Okay fine whatever. Now stop complaining and asking for stuff, someone is about to perform."
They all sat in silence, watching Jannabi perform. Fai really enjoyed Janabbi's music, but having a group play with drums gave Fai a headache. The performance ended after ten minutes and it was time for a well-needed ad break.
"Fai," Soobin called out, "Stop thinking, you look like you're frying your brain."
"Are you aware of the concept of law of attraction?" Fai asked the five males, "I'm trying to manifest something, if I think about it so much then it'll happen."
Jin, sat in front of them, started to laugh and turned around, "Does it actually work?"
"I don't know, but we'll see today."
"Ugh," Jimin pinched Fai's cheek, "You're so cute."
Yoongi turned around, "What is it that you're trying to attract?"
"I'm not supposed to tell you," Fai shook her head, "If you tell people your wishes then they'll never come true, a lesson to all of you."
"Woah," Namjoon clapped, "Life lessons with Fai."
"I'm so moving, I know." Fai jokingly said causing everyone to laugh.
The award show went on and on for a while, more awards were given, Fai won the Top 10 award as she was ranked within the top 10 artists listened to on Melon and more performances occured. Fai and her label mates had to go back and forth backstage in order to give interviews and take pictures. There was almost an hour left of the award show, curfew already past meaning the underage idols had to leave.
Fai, was now sat in the back row alone as Soobin and Yeonjun were still backstage.
Jimin turned around looking at Fai, "Do you want me to pull a chair so you can sit next to us?"
"No," Fai quickly answered, she didn't want to make a scene and mess up the producer's seating chart, "It's okay. Don't worry about it."
Jungkook stood up and went to sit next to Fai. Jungkook turned his head, facing Fai so that the audience would not see what he would say, "May I tell you something?"
"Sure," Fai nodded.
"I like your dress, you look really pretty today."
Fai let out a small laugh, "What....That was really random, I didn't expect for you to say that."
"I mean it."
Fai nodded, "Woahhh you're so brave Oppa. But, thank you, I appreciate it."
Jungkook smiled, "So what is it you were trying to manifest?"
Fai rose her eyebrow, jokingly saying, "Yeah nice try buddy. I won't tell you."
"Come on," Jungkook nudged Fai, "You can tell me."
"Nope, but you'll know when it happens."
"I'm sorry for interrupting," A producer said, "But, Fai-ssi, may I ask you to go sit next to the two Itzy girls? We need to give them more camera time."
Fai nodded and she was lead to sit next to them, to the left of Lia. The three of them sat in an awkward silence, Fai and Lia were friends once upon a time but they had trouble with staying in contact with each other. The last time Fai actually spoke to anyone in Itzy was in end of June because they promoted at the same time and Fai had bubble tea sent to them. The reality is, Fai had sent messages to Lia, however, the replies took days and they were dry so Fai decided that it wouldn't be worth it.
"Umm," Fai spoke up getting both of their attention, "You performed well and congrats on your rookie of the year award."
"Thank you," Yeji smiled.
"You performed well too," Lia said, Fai gave them a respectful nod and turned back to watch the rest of the show.
Fai wanted to go run into a wall, her speaking made the atmosphere even more awkward. Fai looked around the dome and locked eyes with Jungkook. Jungkook gave Fai a smile and shot her a thumbs up.
The second Yeonjun and Soobin returned to their seats, Fai rushed and sat next to them. The show was slowly coming to a close, all that had to happen was BTS' performance and the daesang announcements. BTS' performance was incredible, to put it shortly.
'Woahhh, they get real horses while I get an animated dragon. This is what happens when you're the biggest boy group in the world.' Fai thought to herself.
Everything happened so quickly, soon enough it was time to announce the daesangs and the first one was Song of the Year.
"And the Song of The Year daesang goes to," Lee Jehoon took a pause to add some suspense, "BTS, congratulations."
Fai's heart shattered, she wanted to break down right at the spot, but all she could do is stand up, clap and smile for her seniors. If there was anything on earth that she wanted, was a Song of The Year daesang for the song she had written.
BTS went on to win all three daesangs of the night, Fai was happy for them truthfully. The group just made history and deservingly so. But at the same time, Fai wanted to make history too.
The award show ended, all the artists went on stage to thank all the fans for attending. Afterwards, they were allowed to go back to their dressing rooms to end off the night.
Fai rushed to the bathroom and threw up, a symptom of her anxiety and in addition her disappointment. After Fai left the bathroom, she drank water and was told she had to start filming. Fai kept a smile on as she was filming her final thoughts for the Behind video the company was filming for her channel. As soon as the camera switched off, Fai started to tear up.
"Oh Fai! Please don't cry, you'll ruin your makeup," Fai's makeup stylist, Wheein, said.
"I don't care, just take it off." Fai started to cry.
Her makeup and hairstylists started to remove Fai's makeup and fixed her hair to a neat ponytail. Fai left to the changing area and changed into a shirt and skinny jeans. Doing all that, while crying.
She sat on the couch and her manager, Jinyoung, sat next to her, patting her back. "Tell me what you're feeling."
"I really wanted to win Song of The Year," Fai sobbed, "And I thought I would. I won nothing today."
"Don't say that, you won Top 10 and best choreography. You did win something tonight."
"I'm going home a loser." Fai cried even harder, "I tried my hardest this year, my song has charted well consistently this year despite I had a terrible scandal. This isn't to say that BTS didn't try their hardest or they don't deserve the award. I just thought maybe I would win it considering my song is the highest-charting idol song of the year."
"I know and you're allowed to feel like this," Jinyoung rubbed Fai's back, "As you've said, you charted incredibly well and that's what people will remember."
"That's not true, no one will remember me tonight. BTS made history, but I wanted to make history too."
"There are still other award shows you have the possibility of winning on. Don't worry Fai."
Fai grabbed a tissue and blew her nose, "I want to go home."
"Alright, the staff and I need to get some things done. I'll take you home in around half an hour." Jinyoung stood up, the staff gave Fai space. Eventually, Fai did stop crying, but she still felt down.
"Hey," A voice spoke up, around fifteen minutes after Fai was left alone. Fai looked up seeing Jungkook stand at the door of her dressing room. Jungkook walked over and sat next to Fai, "Are you okay?"
Fai nodded, "Perky."
"Liar."
"Yeah, you're right."
"Are you going to the after-party?" Jungkook asked.
Fai shook her head, "Are you?"
"The other members are going, but I decided not to."
"Why not? You should go celebrate with them."
"My heart isn't really feeling it," Jungkook shrugged, "How are you getting home tonight?"
"Manager."
"Do you want to go eat chicken and have some beer?"
"Maybe next time, I think I'm going to hang out with Mark."
"Mmm, alright. I'll get going then. I'll see you tomorrow at the company or something."
"Alright." Fai nodded, she reached out unlocking her phone and dialled Mark's phone, "Hey."
"Hey," Mark said through the phone.
"I just got done, did you see my performance?"
"Yeah I did, I switched the show off after you finished performing though. I hope you called to share good news."
"I didn't win."
"Oh fuck. Baby, it's okay."
Fai blinked not wanting her tears to fall out, "What're you doing? I want to spend time with you."
"Um, I'm with Nagyong right now. Let's hang out tomorrow night."
Fai's heart dropped, "Oh, okay."
"Yeah, but-."
Fai quickly cut Mark off, "Listen, I have to go now."
"Okay, text me. I love you."
"Alright," Fai ended the call. Fai picked up her bag trying to rush out of the door. She called out to Jinyoung, "Oppa, you don't have to take me home tonight. I'm going out."
"Be safe then," Jinyoung yelled as Fai got out of the door.
Fai peaked through all the heads, backstage was filled with staff and it didn't help that Jungkook's hair was black, just like every single male out there. It didn't take long for Fai to spot Jungkook, she speed walked and tapped Jungkook's arm.
Jungkook turned around and smiled once he saw Fai, "Hey."
"Is the chicken and beer offer still on the table?" Fai asked.
"Of course it is. My car is parked in the garage here."
"Okay cool!"
"Do you want me to carry your bag?" Fai nodded and Jungkook took Fai's bag, "Since I'm driving, I'm not going to drink beer, but I'll get you a can and we can get the chicken and park somewhere to eat in my car. How does that sound?
"I'm trying not to drink anymore."
"Oh okay.. Tell me what you want to do and we'll do it."
"Mini pancakes and ice cream would be nice."
"Sounds like a plan."
They continued to walk together through the packed area, soon enough they were in the car on their way to go get some dessert. It didn't take long for them to get the dessert and park somewhere.
Aside from the soft music playing, the car was silent. Fai spoke up, "Do you want to know what I was hoping for?"
"Only if you feel comfortable."
"Song of the year."
"I could tell," Jungkook said, "You were good at hiding your feelings, but I saw right through you."
"Can I be honest with you?"
"Of course you can."
"The worst part is, I'm jealous of you for winning it."
Jungkook's eyes widened, that was the last thing he expected Fai to say and he didn't know how to feel about it. He didn't want Fai to be jealous of an award he received, but it was inevitable as he knew she deserved it, "I-"
Fai cut Jungkook off, "Please don't say anything about it."
"Okay."
"I don't want you to feel bad for me or feel bad about the awards you've won tonight. You've won it fair and square and you deserve to feel proud. My heart, it stings, but I've accepted it."
"If I were in your position, I'd be furious. I don't understand how you could be in the same car as me."
"I can't be mad at you because you deserve it, at an international level Boy With Luv did way better than Gotta Go."
"You're a good person Fai, I can't believe you think that way."
"I cried all my negative feelings out." Fai shrugged, "Can I tell you something else?"
"Yeah."
"Out of all the seniors I've met, you've become my favourite."
"What?" Jungkook eyes brightened, "Seriously?" How come?"
"Because...You don't treat me like a younger sister that you'll do anything for to take care of. You treat me like a person you like talking to," Fai spoke truthfully, "But Oppa, you can't tell anyone."
"No way! Do you really expect me to stay silent about it?"
"Yes."
"Wait so does that mean you use the AirPods case I bought you."
"No, that's weird. I don't want to take out my AirPods and have your face staring back at me. Ew."
"Did you just describe my visuals as ew?"
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⋰˚☆ Social Media
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⋰˚☆ Aya's Thoughts
there's a lot of things that happened in this chapter lmao, so what do you think?
how do you feel?
mark & fai may or may not have an argument next chapter, idk 👀
anyways, any requests?