The girl talked a lot but I listened to every word. She is super cute like a small child telling story after story. I was a little surprised that she would continue to talk to me instead of the literal idols sitting in front of us.
I'm glad she did most of the talking because I'm dead tired. When I checked the time, it was well past midnight.
I basically chased the girl and myself away since they need their rest. I offered the girl if she wanted to stay the night since my home is so close. She refuses with a flustered face but I eventually won with convincing. I wouldn't want a woman walking back home alone in the dark. I would never forgive myself if something happened to her.
I showed her to the guest room and headed to bed myself. She had to go in for work and I had the day off.
For once, I was lazing around, doing absolutely nothing. I quite enjoyed it. I surfed the internet, watching a few BTS videos. I got sucked in way too easily and hours felt like minutes. Then I watched a few Stray Kids videos.
I was essentially making fun of Felix the entire time. He thinks he's so cool, and most people see it but I definitely don't. I did feel more reassured, watching their videos of them interacting with one another. I'm glad Felix found his family. I decided to text him.
Thing #2
Me
-You better not forget about me!
I send him that with no context. I laugh a little as I imagine his confused or irritated state when he gets this message.
I then watch other groups. NCT, Seventeen, Twice, Red Velvet, Big Bang, Monsta X, ONEUS, Super Junior, anything that popped up. It was just one video after the other. I didn't need to watch comedians when I could just watch them.
I froze when the Blackpink stuff started to pop up. I take a deep breath and click on a video. I can't run away forever. And besides, I wanna see Jisoo. So I begin watching, Jisoo seems like the mother of the group. Jennie acts just like she did when we were friends. I don't really feel much anymore when I see her. I just feel tired.
I focus more on the other three. Lisa is super cool and energetic. Rose is very level headed but cute at the same time.
I wonder if I'll run into them in the future...
Probably not, maybe Jisoo but probably not Jennie. That ship has sailed long ago.
But who knows. Never say never.
Two weeks passes and I haven't heard much from BTS. They're too busy with interviews and never catching a break. I did go see Felix the one day with four other people in his group.
The rest were busy with something.
The girl I invited to the concert keeps on talking to me and inviting me to do things with her. She's super sweet so I obviously agree. She introduces me to her friends and they're nice too. And I finally learnt her name, Solar.
I was busy editing another video when my phone lights up.
"Open the door" I see a text. I check the name. I drop everything and quickly head down to open up for him.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" I ask with a smile as I open the door for him to pass.
"I came bearing gifts" Namjoon says as he holds up two iced-coffees.
"That's not what I asked" I say with a tired smile. He hugs me and I hug back.
"I missed you" he whispers into my ear. I pat his back.
"Yip yip. Come in" I say as he releases me from the hug. He hums in agreement with his dimpled smile.
"Tell me all about your girl" I say with a smug smirk. We were sitting on my couch, sipping the drinks he got us.
He already explained that he was done for the day. He just came back from an interview so he still has a bit of makeup on his face. He says he's taking a quick break.
"Yeah, about that-" he starts off sheepishly while rubbing his neck. He pauses as he looks at my expecting eyes.
"It's not gonna work out" he tells me straight in the eyes.
"Why not?" I ask as my smile falls into a small frown, turning serious.
"She's a nice girl but she's not the one I like" he says politely. My face pales. That means I set him up with some random girl.
"I am so sorry. I honestly thought it was her. I was just trying to help you" I beg for forgiveness, feeling incredibly guilty.
"It's all good" he says gently as he slowly lifts up my head. I look him in the face to see his dimpled smile. I melt into a smile. I tackle him in a hug.
"I'm so glad to have a friend like you" I breathe into the hug. It's silent until he speaks again.
"...Listen" he starts with a gulp. I sit back and look at him. His cheeks are flushed and he seems to be shaking while looking down.
"Are you ok?" I ask as I put a hand on his cheek.
"I-I" Namjoon stutters as he looks me in the eyes.
"I-I can't do it" he says as he grabs his stuff and leaves.
"Wait-do what?" I chase after him, grabbing a hold of his arm. His back faces me. He doesn't turn around to face me.
"Please stay. We can talk it out" I say. Why does he want to leave so suddenly? Did I do something wrong?
Silence fills the air. He doesn't move.
"...Is it something I did wrong?" I ask, breaking the silence.
"Please say something" I grow even more quiet with each word.
"Please stay" I breathe out.
I don't want him to leave me. I can't let go of his limp arm but my grip loosens. I feel weak.
He seems hurt. I don't want him to leave like this. I don't want him to feel this way. I want-no-need him to be happy so that I can be happy.
"What's wrong? You can tell me anything. You know that, right?" I ask with a tilt of my head. Why is he being so strange today? But it hurts me to see him like this.
He turns around with wide glossy eyes.
"Hey" I gently say. With my remaining strength, I cup my hand in one of his cheeks. I can't seem weak-especially not now.
"What's wrong?" I say with a gentle smile.
"Do you really think that I belong with that woman?" Namjoon finally speaks. I couldn't hide the shock on my face but melt into a smile.
"You really don't have to be with her. I was just hasty. I've been selfish with your love life" I say, swiping away the single teardrop that managed to escape his eye.
"You really don't have to worry about it" I say with a smile.
He engulfs me in a hug. He buries his head into my shoulder as I rub slow circles around his back. He put all his weight on me and I really had to hold my ground not to fall over.
"...I'm sorry but I can't think of any other way" he suddenly says after a bit of silence. I was about to ask what he was going to apologize for but then he lifts his head off my shoulder and stares me deep into my eyes. The lights shine from the side and I can see the beautiful man in front of me clearly. I felt my heart beating. His face inches closer and closer to mine until our noses were touching.
"Ca-can I kiss you?" He asks with a bit of haze in his eyes. I nodded ever so slightly. His lips slowly closes the distance to mine until I feel them against mine. This kiss felt different from Yoongi's kiss. It was a lot more gentle this time and I actually registered what was happening and it felt like this was the best thing to do at that moment.
He holds my waist as the kiss deepens. My hands were loosely hung around his neck, enjoying the moment. I pull away before we go to far. My cheeks were flushed, as well as his. We just stare into each other's eyes.
He pecks my forehead and holds onto me for longer. He rests his head on top of my head. My face was buried into his chest. My arms were loosely hanging by my sides. Did that just happen?!
"Just so that I make it clear...I like you" he says on top of my head. I feel my face growing hotter.
"I've felt like this for a long time" he carries on then sighs.
"But you never seem to notice" he says as he squeezes me a little tighter. Again, my ignorance has hurt people.
"Sorry" I quietly let out.
"It's not your fault" he simply says with a sigh.
"Thanks for the kiss" Namjoon says with his dimpled smile as he looks me in my face.
"I know you need to sort stuff out so don't worry about an answer" Namjoon says with his gleeful smile, ruffling my hair a little.
"What is with all this touching hair things" I say with a frown, shoving his arm off me. He just laughs.
"But thanks."
Then my phone makes a lot of noise. I am pretty sure I set it to silent.
"Don't answer that" Namjoon says suddenly.
"Well...I was going to ignore it but now I'm definitely going to answer it" I say with a cheeky smile. I dive for my phone. I didn't get there in time as Namjoon captures my waist.
"Yo!" I yell as I struggle out of his grip. I laugh at his face in victory as he frowns. I run for my phone with Namjoon on my tail. He keeps chasing me as I look on my phone. Luckily, I know the layout of my house like the back of my hand.
I hear Namjoon bumping into everything in his way. I check my phone to see a bunch of texts from Jungkook. At first, he was looking for Namjoon then the later texts says that he was here. I stop running and Namjoon almost runs into me.
"Give me that" Namjoon says as he yanks my phone from my hands.
"Sure" I say with a cheeky smile and leave.
"Stay right here" I say by the door and leave to open the door for Jungkook.
"Yeah, he's in here" I say as I open the door to my apartment, greetings already put aside.
"Why're you here?" Namjoon asks the second Jungkook sets foot in my home.
"Looking for you. Seokjin sent me" Jungkook says.
"You could've just called me. I'm busy right now" Namjoon says with a tight smile.
"Clearly" Jungkook says with a smirk.
"And we already tried calling you. Check your phone dude" Jungkook says and Namjoon fishes his phone out of his pocket.
"Oh..." is all Namjoon says. I snicker a little.
"Why are you looking for me?" Namjoon asks.
"As I said, Seokjin's looking for you. He just made me do the dirty work" Jungkook says as he chews his cheek.
"Did he bribe you with food?" I say with a cheeky smile, smile hiding behind my hand.
"Well duh" Jungkook says as if it's the most obvious thing.
"My man" I say as I hold up my hand.
"Yeah!" Jungkook says with a smile as we high five each other.
"Please don't encourage him" Namjoon says with a sigh.
"Let's go" Namjoon says as he smacks Jungkook's head.
"Hey! What was that for?" Jungkook says with a huge frown.
"Needed to slap some sense into you" Namjoon says with a cheeky smile.
(I do not own the video.)