Spencer hugged you tightly as you told him about your past. He sat and listened.
He alternated between playing with your hair and slowly rubbing your back. When you finished talking you were crying. You nuzzled your head deeper into his chest.
"I'm so weak..." you mumbled. Spencer shook his head.
"No you're not y/n. You're the strongest person I know. You didn't let your past stop you from achieving the best possible life for you in the now. You took those moments and turned them around and turned it to something good, the FBI. You made a better life for yourself. You didn't let your past dictate your present. You're so incredibly strong y/n."
If you weren't already crying that would've got you. He had a way with words and it honestly helped you. You felt like you pushed off this weight you had been carrying for so long.
"Hey." He lightly shook you. You moved your head to face him. This was the first time you looked at him in the past hours you had been laying on him. You were down. He lifted your head by your chin and whispered,
"I love you."
He softly kissed you. His touch made you feel safe.
"That special someone was Clarke?" He hinted at your necklace. You shook your head and cried again.
"Hey hey what's wrong? Should I not of brung her up?" He didn't mean to upset you.
"It's not that. It's just I haven't called her in months. What kind of friend am I? I practically ghosted my best friend."
"No you didn't. She must know how difficult your job is. She understands. Look, why don't you call her tomorrow, when you're sober? I'll call us in sick and we'll spend the whole day together, if you want of course."
That sounded nice. A day to recollect yourself. After your outburst at the bar you definitely didn't want to see the team anytime soon.
"Come on, lets go to sleep." He suggested.
You got up first and looked at the clock on the wall. 3:28am. Damn. You talked for that long?
He grabbed your hand and walked to the bedroom.
"You can shower if you want, there's a towel in there and I can give you some clothes to wear."
A shower couldn't hurt. Maybe the hot water could wash off the embarrassment and alcohol that still lingered through you.
You ended up being in there for 45 minutes. You mainly spent the time crying. Spencer was waiting in the bedroom reading a book. He didn't want you to fall asleep alone.
You changed into his purple boxers and sweater before walking out.
"Sorry I took so long. I couldn't get the water temperature right." You lied. He knew that wasn't the issue but he didn't want to question you about it. You were pretty emotional.
You got into his bed and faced away from him. He closed his book and turned the lamp off. He moved closer to you and wrapped an arm around your waist.
You cried again before finally drifting off. Spencer listened the whole time as you silently wept. He listened to your breathing and when he knew you were asleep he muttered,
"You'll get through this. I'll help you."