You know how you see someone in a certain light and that's how you see them forever? And then they do one thing. One little thing, and it changes you forever.
I guess you could say we'd been having problems for a long time. But neither of us wanted to admit it. It's just...when you're in love, it doesn't matter.
But then, the little fights start to add up. The nights you spend crying start to outnumber the days that you're happy.
You try to convince yourself that you're happy. And you are.
But you're also exhausted.
You think, 'This is nothing, we're just having a little fight. We can get through this.'
And you do.
But then there's another fight. And another. And another.
Suddenly it's all fights.
'Where does it end?', you think to yourself, wrapped up in your softest blanket. Your fingers ache as you hold onto something that reminds you of him. Something that reminds you of days when you really were happy. When you weren't always fighting. You hold as tightly as you can for the fear that if you let go, it's over.
How can you be happy without him? You were at your happiest with him and he still makes you happy. You don't want to go back to a life without him. You don't know how to live life without him anymore. You can get over it. Its just this little thing.
Right?
You love him.
But then you don't.