The intercom wakes me with a loud ding, making me check my surroundings with a small panic because I previously forgot that I am on a plane back to America.
"Please fasten your seatbelts, we are ready for descent." I hear Peter say over the speakers.
I rub my eyes, trying to wake up and be alert when we land. It was probably not a good idea I basically slept for the whole plane ride because it's 5:30 pm in America and I might have trouble sleeping tonight. I might have to go on a run later to tire myself out.
We land safely and I turn back on my phone, expecting a text from Brian and hoping for one from Harry. My heart is slowly broken when I get no new messages. I was at least expecting Brian to say something once he talked to Mary. Maybe he'll call me tomorrow to speak about it.
As I exit the plane, I am greeted by my old driver, Margaret. I immediately start sprinting towards her open arms and bring her into a hug.
"My love!" She hugs me tightly.
All of the emotions from the past week come flooding out. I let myself release a sob and tears roll down my face as Margaret holds me. She rubs my back for a while, while the flight crew packs my bags in the car.
"Let's go, honey. Your father wants you home as soon as possible."
I nod and get into the front passenger seat of the car. As soon as I was old enough to sit in the front seat, Margaret let me. My dad was never fond of my being very close to her, feeling as though, I believe, I replaced my mother with her.
That is not the case at all. She was a motherly figure to me even when my mom was alive.
On the way back to the house, Margaret and I caught up on our lives. I found out she now has five grandchildren as opposed to the two she had when I first left. She brags about her one, Mary, who is around 6 years old and is very smart. I'm sure she got that from her grandmother. Margaret is incredibly intelligent and actually has a master's degree in English. She was a professor at a college for a lot of years. My mom actually had her for a class and when she retired offered her the job as a driver for us. For some reason, I still don't know but I'm determined to find out, she said yes.
"I don't want to go in." I tell Margaret as we idle outside the house after driving through the gate and up the driveway.
She shrugs, "I can sit here for a while, we're good on gas. One thing though, your dad knows you're here because we opened the gate."
"I just need a few more minutes."
Margaret shrugs, silently telling me to take as much time as I need.
After five minutes of complete silence, there's a knock on my window. Margaret and I both jump about ten feet in the air.
Immediately, I roll my window down.
"Morgan, dad wants you inside." Thomas, my middle brother, says and waits a few seconds. "Now."
This snaps me out of my thoughts of what my dad has to say to me and I quickly get out of the car, taking my bags out and making my way to the front door.
Before I walk in, I take a good look at the place. It's a lot bigger than I remember it. The tan bottom and brick top, going up and making peaks. The porch and extension to my right. The house only gets bigger as you go to the back. I admire the bushes that stay green for the entire year.
Taking a deep breath and preparing for what's about to happen, I open the door. As soon as the door is open, I am greeted by a young boy who looks almost exactly like my brothers and father. "Hey, you're the lady in the pictures."
I give him a curious look, "Uh yeah, I used to live here. I'm your dad's sister."
"Not, not here, the other pictures. The pictures my dad had."
"Oh in your house. Well, that's because I'm your aunt, Morgan. I haven't been around since you've been alive."
"No, the pictures are in-" He tries to continue, kind of sounding annoyed that I wasn't understanding that was the case.
"Stephen." My dad interrupts, Stephen, I guess his name is. "Please go with Charlie, I have to talk to Morgan."
The boy immediately runs away towards Charlie's room. Poor kid. My question is whose kid is that. No one told me any of my brothers had a child. I would guess it's Greg, my oldest brother's kid. Him and I were never close so it makes sense I wouldn't know about this mile stone in his life.
"That's messed up." Instead of a verbal response, my dad just raises and eyebrow at me. "One of my brothers named their son Stephen Stevens. That kid is going to hate that when he's older."
My dad takes a deep breath and then silently tells me to follow him. We walk to the kitchen without a word being uttered. He hands me a cup of hot chocolate while he has what I assume is coffee.
"His last name isn't Stevens."
"So which one of them got married and took the other person's last name?"
"None of them." My dad takes a sip out of his mug, waiting for me to ask my next question.
"Dad, the kid looks just like you and all three of your sons, you cannot tell me that child is not related to us." I continue trying to figure out what he's saying.
"I never said that."
I take a minute to collect my thoughts. "There's no way." I say in disbelief. "He was taken from me before I even knew he was a boy." I'm now looking at my hands, taking deep breaths trying not to lose my mind. The past five years have been spent trying to block this out of my mind. When I was 17 I got pregnant and by the time the baby was born, the court had ruled sole custody to my ex-boyfriend whose family had paid off the judges.
"Morgan, I know it's hard-" my dad reaches for my hand, squeezing it when he gets a hold of it.
"It's not hard, it's impossible! Eric got him and left. The court thought he was better fit to take care of my child!"
"I know, sweetheart, I know. However, Eric has ended up in jail and the court overturned their ruling. For the sake of Stephen. They now believe you are fit."
I run my hand over my head, grabbing at my pony tail, yanking the end in frustration. "So what I'm getting out of this is that because I had a good life and job in England and the court stopped getting their payment from the Johnson's, they finally pick who was actually more fit to be a parent."
"That and Stephen's father is in prison now for running a crack house with your son living in it."
"What?! I'm gonna kill him. He put our son in a fucking crack house?!"
My dad grabs my wrist before I can stand up and rush out of the house. "Morgan, it's not worth it. Eric is not worth it."
"But my son is. He did not deserve to go through that. I cannot believe after paying off the judge to make him sole parent, even before our child was born, he would do this!"
Suddenly, I feel less angry about having to leave England and come home. Now all of my rage is put into ex-boyfriend and his life.
Getting up and walking around the kitchen island, my dad wrapped me in his arms. He gives me a kiss on the side of my head while tears stream down my face. "I shouldn't have left. I should have fought harder, let you get the really expensive lawyers but I didn't."
"Hey, hey," He tries to shush my crying by petting my head. "It's okay, sweetheart. There was nothing you could have done that would have the ruling changed. Their family is too powerful. Always has been and always will be."
A few minutes go by, my dad and I just in the kitchen.
Taking a deep breath in and closing my eyes briefly. "I need to go formally meet him then, as his mom I guess."
"Maybe go take a shower and cool off first."
"You saying I stink, dad?"
He laughs and shakes his head. "No, but you do smell like plane." He gets up, grabs his cup and leaves the kitchen.
This makes me get up and go to my room where my bags have already been placed.
I pick up my phone and see that it is already 8pm, that conversation taking much longer than I would have liked. This also means that if I were to call Brian, I wouldn't be able to reach him because it is a work night and it is 1am.
I do as my dad said, for the first time since I was 16 years old, and take a shower. He was right, I needed to cool down in the shower and get ready to introduce myself. I'm not sure what I am even going to say to Stephen.
Before I can overthink this and make it more complicated for myself I get out of the shower and throw on some sweat pants and a tee shirt.
When walking down the stairs, I pause for a moment and take in my house. I have always admired the house, being so big and elegant. However, as I got older, the house seemed to feel more and more like a prison.
Shaking those negative thoughts away, I step into the living room. First, I spot my dad and Charlie sitting and talking in hushed tones. Then, I realize Stephen isn't there.
"Sorry, sweets, it's past 9:30 so he's in bed. You can talk to him after he gets out of school tomorrow afternoon."
My shoulders slump immediately. I was finally excited about something in this house for the first time in what feels like a decade, but I took too long in the shower. "It's okay, that's probably better anyway, I can sleep on everything."
Both my dad and Charlie nod. "All of us have work tomorrow so you're by yourself all day. Will you be okay."
I nod and give my dad a smile. "Yeah I'll be fine. I get to go explore and see what you've done with the place in the past five years."
"And after you're done speaking with your son, we need to talk."
My heart rate accelerates. This was inevitable, we have to talk about the elephant in the room at some point and unfortunately that will be tomorrow. I'm not sure if I'm ready to speak to my dad about England and everything that happened, but I will be forced to.
Before I could say anything that might anger my dad before bed, I head back upstairs and lay down on my childhood bed and take a moment to look around my room. It's like a time capsule. Big Time Rush and Jonas Brothers posters everywhere as well as photos of my friends and family.
I fall asleep with no trouble, contrary to what I thought earlier. I am emotionally drained and need energy tomorrow to have the biggest two talks of my life up until this point.
This is what I pictured as Morgan's family's house: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/172-Cedar-St-East-Hampton-NY-11937/59549538_zpid/?
Also I was supposed to be seeing Louis in concert yesterday, so I'm sad bc that didn't happen obviously. :(
Anyway, thanks for reading and let me know what you think!
xx Courtney