Chapter 7
Isang tingin ko pa lang kay Samantha Sariet, alam kong hindi na niya ako gusto.
Just like her mother, Samantha is very stylish and very pretty. She's the type of girl that Denise and Shanna would approve of. Mas maikling palda, maikling buhok na bumagay sa maliit at suplada niyang mukha, at sagana ang hinaharap. For a high school girl like her, she looks very mature.
"Samantha, introduce yourself to the class..." ang adviser namin na ngiting-ngiti habang pinagmamasdan ang bagong kaklase.
She glanced at us with her bored eyes, heaved a sigh and then nodded.
"My name is Samantha Sariet. 16. I'm from Manila."
A hush of excited whispers filled the room. My girl classmates are looking at her with envy while my male classmates are surely crushing on her right now.
Hindi pa rin natatanggal ang pagkagulat sa mukha ko. I don't have any idea what she's doing here. Parang kahapon lang ay nakita ko siyang dumalo sa aming Halloween costume party at ngayon ay biglang kaklase ko na siya. It's all so sudden.
"And your parents?" udyok naman ng adviser namin. I glanced at her again, suddenly interested. I wonder how she'd introduce her mother, Valerie?
"My mom is Valerie Sariet. She's the chief strategist of some agricultural company. My father is dead."
Oh.
Despite the negative aura that she's radiating, I can't help but feel sorry for her. So that explains the absence of her father during the party. Wala na pala ang kaniyang ama. Somehow, I'm still very lucky that both my parents are at home, tending to my needs and being there for me.
"Kilala mo?"
Napalingon ako kay Jess nang kinalabit niya ako. I could tell that she's also scrutinizing the new classmate, Samantha. Maliit na ngiti lang ang inalay ko sa kaniya.
"Not really. Her mother works for us."
"Eh di trabahante niyo pala?"
Napalingon sa amin ang lalaking nakaupo sa harapan, pati na rin ang babaeng katabi niya. Mabilis akong nag-iwas ng tingin, bahagyang nahiya sa natamong hindi inaasahang atensyon mula sa kanila.
"H-Hindi naman siguro ganun, Jess. Nanay niya lang ang nagtatrabaho sa amin..."
"Ah..." aniya na labas sa ilong. She eyed as Samantha was instructed to occupy the seat at the front row. I noticed that she's wearing the velvet YSL mini backpack and a Jimmy choo golden bracelet wraps her slender arm. It made me think of how much her mother earns to sustain what could be a lavish lifestyle of Samantha.
Napaisip din ako... kung biglang nandito si Samantha sa private school na pinapasukan ko, ibig din bang sabihin na nandito rin si Steve?
I shivered at the thought. To be honest, I'm not comfortable of the way Steve looks at me. He introduced himself briefly during the party and the arrogant smirk plastered on his lips is both annoying and uncomfortable. Samantha doesn't seem interested in me, unlike her brother who keeps on making lewd remarks every time I bump into him at the hacienda.
Inignora ko nalang ang mga iniisip at mas pinagtuunan ng pansin ang mga takdang-aralin na kailangan naming ipasa.
By lunchtime, all the boys in our classroom adore Samantha Sariet. She's pretty, witty, and tall. No one wouldn't like her. She's like the mini version of her mother, Valerie.
Blake is out of the town again. Sinundo ako ng driver namin pauwi. Tahimik na nakamasid lang ako sa labas hanggang sa marating namin ang mansion.
I murmured a silent thanks to him and climbed out of the vehicle. When I entered the mansion, I saw my mother busy picking out a new dress, with her personal stylist, Bliss, by her side.
"Nandito ka na pala, Anna." Mother leaned closer to give me a quick kiss on the cheeks. "Nagpadala ang Dad mo ng mga damit na pagpipilian natin para sa engagement party ng panganay na anak ng mga Montealegre. Go check out the dresses in your room."
I nodded, happy to see the glow in my mother's face again. Hindi ko na sila naririnig na nag-aaway ni Dad. Maybe it's a good thing. Seeing her happy and back to picking out dresses again makes my heart warm.
I didn't bother mentioning to her that Valerie's children are attending the same school as mine. I figured she doesn't need to know it. Mabagal akong nagpunta patungo sa kwarto ko. When I opened the door, I saw several dresses laid gently on top of my bed.
Inilapag ko ang bag sa katabing table at nilapitan ang mga damit na nakalatag sa kama. Dad even included a box of chocolates and some flowers. A ghost of smile touched my lips but it quickly faded when I saw the exact same YSL mini backpack and the Jimmy Choo bracelet.
I picked it up and examined it closely. Biglang sumikip ang dibdib ko nang mapagtantong ito rin ang parehong suot ni Samantha. I'm sixteen but I'm no fool. I don't think it's a coincidence that Samantha is wearing the same designer stuff that Dad gave to me, given his questionable relationship with Valerie.
Bigla akong nawalan ng gana na um-attend sa nasabing party. Namuo ang mga luha ko sa mata. Suddenly, I wanted Blake to be here. He would know what to tell me and know what to do when I am this sad.
I bit my lower lip and glanced at my phone. Why don't I call him? It's half past four. His important meetings would usually take place in the morning and in the afternoon, he's either in his hotel room resting or preparing for an evening meeting.
Nagdadalawang isip pa ako kung tatawag ako o hindi. Kinakabahan kasi ako. I don't know why I should even feel so nervous about one phone call. Blake is Blake. He wouldn't mind it. And I just wanted to hear his voice really bad. I wanted him to comfort me, even when he's miles away from me.
Taking a deep breath, I dialed his number and went to the window. Pinagmasdan ko si Baste na tahimik na dinidiligan ang mga halaman at bulaklak sa hardin. From a distance, I could see his father yelling some instructions. He just nodded and continued watering the plants, oblivious of my staring.
I could feel the muscles in my stomach twisting into knots as the phone kept ringing. I was just about to give up and end the call when I heard the line connect.
"Hey, Blake—"
"Sino 'to?"
Nanlamig ako ng makarinig ng hindi pamilyar na boses ng babae. I stared at nothing, shocked for a few moments, as I tried to absorb what I just heard.
"I-I'm sorry..." I stammered. "Must have been a wrong number."
"You're looking for Blake?" she queried in her regal voice.
My lips trembled. Ipinikit ko nang mariin ang mga mata. A sharp wave of pain hit my chest, making it harder to breath.
"Uhm..."
"Just a minute. He's still in the shower."
My mouth went dry. I could hear other muffled voices in the background before I finally got to hear Blake's voice.
"Anna—"
Hindi ko na siya pinatapos sa pagsasalita. I immediately ended the call. I clutched my throbbing chest and fought the tears welling up in my eyes. Muntik na akong mapatalon nang maramdaman ko ang pag-vibrate ng cellphone ko. I saw him calling.
Fighting for composure, I calmly declined the call and decided to turn off my phone. Ibinalik ko ito sa bag at ibinagsak ang sarili sa kama. I stared at the ceiling blankly, my lips trembling and my heart aching.
"Anna, why aren't you getting ready for the party?"
Nagmamadali akong bumaba dala-dala ang bag ko. I shoved in my pink tights and my ballerina shoes inside. I just decided that I don't want to go to that party, meet or talk with anyone, or risk the chances of seeing Valerie and her children again.
"Hindi po ako sasama sa party, Mama."
Mother looks shocked. Inilapag niya ang hawak na Valentino dress at nilapitan ako. I could see the worry in her eyes.
"Why? Where are you going?"
"Sa studio po." I murmured.
She blinked and stared at me, still trying to process what I'm saying. "You don't want to go to the party?"
Nanghihina akong umiling.
"But hija, your father sent all these lovely dresses to try on. Are you sure you really don't want to go?"
"Sa susunod nalang po."
My mother, understanding and elegant as she is, calmly nodded.
"Okay. If that's what you want. Hindi naman kita pipiliting pumunta kung ayaw mo talaga."
I nodded, happy that she could understand me, unlike my father who's starting to lose grip on his only daughter.
"Basta't sasamahan ka ni Baste at magpapahatid ka sa driver. Ayokong ikaw lang mag-isa ang pupunta doon."
I wanted to protest but decided to close my mouth. Hindi na ako nakipagtalo pa kay Mama at um-oo nalang. She called Baste to come with me. Tahimik naman siyang tumango at sumunod sa akin palabas.
I was so lost in my own thoughts that I haven't talked to him the entire drive to the ballet studio. Tahimik lang ako sa backseat habang siya naman ay kaswal na nakikipag-usap sa aming driver.
Since I don't have an official class today, I am required to pay for the use of the studio. Masaya naman ako dahil walang ibang tao kundi ako lang. I ordered the driver and Baste to grab some drinks. It might take a while before I'm ready to go home.
Changing into my pink tights and shoes, I stepped in the cold, dusty studio. There are life-sized mirrors everywhere and every move I make, I could see my small, slim body.
In a graceful manner that both my ballet teacher and my mother has taught me since I was still a kid, I pulled myself higher and stretched my arms, reaching as far as I can as I waited for the music I could only hear inside of my head.
When the first beat of music started to play, I moved my body aggressively. I am angry at the world for taking advantage of me and angry at myself for letting things happen. The only men in my life, Papa and Blake, have both disappointed me. I trusted them so much but they ended up choosing another girl over me.
Tears welled in my eyes as I continued to dance. Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko. I could feel the anger running through my veins, swimming in my head, and bursting down my chest. I danced and danced till I could feel my legs shaking, my feet throbbing, and my arms trembling in exhaustion.
Words keep on failing me from the very start. There's nothing I would say or write that could justify how I really feel. No one can really reach out to me. But with dancing... with dancing, I feel like I have the world in my hands. The determined look, the elegant curve of my body, the raised toes, and the sharp flick of the wrists, it all says something. I have never been able to expressed myself better than dancing.
Unfortunately, only few can understand my language.
Pagod na pagod ako nang maupo sa sahig. I weakly reached for my bag and my bottled water that I took in three long gulps. Isinandal ko ang ulo sa salamin at tumingala. At least, for a few minutes, I couldn't think of anything but dancing. I could feel my confidence boosting, especially that I know I am without an audience.
"Anna?"
Muntik na akong mapatalon nang marinig ko ang boses ni Baste. I turned to him with wide eyes. Nakasilip lang siya mula sa siwang ng pinto, nag-aalangan ang mga mata.
"Ayos ka lang ba?"
Kinalma ko muna ang sarili bago ko siya sinagot. "Ayos lang ako, Baste. Ba't mo natanong?"
"Nag-aalala lang ako sa iyo. Kanina ka pa kasi tahimik."
I bit my lower lip. I don't really want to talk to anyone right now but I don't have the heart to tell him. Instead, I offered him a small smile.
"Okay lang ako. Walang dapat ipag-alala."
Tumango siya at dahan-dahang isinara ang pinto. When I was alone again, I heaved a sigh of relief. Inubos ko na ang dalang tubig at nagligpit.
Medyo magaan na ang pakiramdam ko habang pauwi kami. Kinakausap ko na rin si Baste, pati ang driver na bakas rin ang pag-aalala sa akin. I smiled at the two of them and assured them that I am fine.
Nang dumating ako sa mansion ay yun na lamang ang gulat ko nang makita ang matangkad na bulto na naghihintay sa labas. I ordered the driver to drop me off outside the gate. Dali-dali akong bumaba ng sasakyan. Blake is leaning against his car, staring at the ground, and looks very problematic.
"Blake?"
Nag-angat siya ng tingin. I could see the fatigue in his eyes. Bumuntong-hininga si Blake at nilapitan ako.
"Anong ginagawa mo dito? Diba nasa Manila ka?"
"I drove all the way here since you're not answering my calls."
My eyes widened in surprise. "Anong..."
"I called your mother. Ang sabi niya ay hindi ka rin daw dumalo sa engagement party ni Peter Montealegre."
Hindi ako nakasagot kaagad.
"Anna, yung narinig mo kanina—"
I quickly put up a palm to stop him from saying whatever he wants to say. Mapait na ngiti ang inialay ko sa kaniya.
"It's okay. Hindi mo naman kailangang magpaliwanag, Blake, eh."
"No. You completely misunderstood it. I was with my college friends after the meeting. It was Claire who answered your call."
I nodded. "Ah, okay. Sige, pasok na ako."
"Anna... please?"
Nanginig ako sa narinig na lambing at panunuyo sa boses niya. He reached for my hand and stared straight into my eyes.
"Really, Blake. It's okay. It's not like you're my boyfriend or anything..."
Nakita ko kaagad ang pag-rehistro ng galit sa kaniyang mga mata. But Blake is the kind of man who spent most of his years controlling his temper, so it quickly vanished. When he spoke again, he is calmer. But I could hear the edges of danger in his voice.
"Damn it, Anna. What do you want me to do?"
I stared at him with wide, doe-like eyes. I don't even know what I want to do. And why is he acting as if he's at my disposal? The thought both pleased and confused me.
"Nothing."
"Eh bakit hindi mo sinasagot ang mga tawag ko? You're acting like you're mad. And if I am so boastful, I would say that... that you're jealous."
Uminit ang mga pisngi ko sa sinabi niya. Nag-iwas ako ng tingin. I am so afraid that if he would stare straight into my eyes, he would know what I am feeling right now.
"If you don't like my friends, just say so. I will stay away from them."
"I don't ever want to be a toxic friend, Blake. Ayokong iwanan mo sila para sa akin. Besides, I am not your only friend. You shouldn't adjust."
"Yes, I know. I just don't want to upset you."
Suddenly, the weight that has been crushing me all day has been lifted from my shoulders. I stared at him, wondering why Blake Sobreval, a very wealthy bachelor and an intelligent man who can get any woman he wants, wouldn't want to upset a 16-year old girl like me.
Tumango ako nang marahan. "I'm sorry I acted that way. It's the first time a girl answered your phone and I just didn't know... what to react."
I should be used to it by now. I've been bullied by Blake's girlfriends before. Some of them went far to threatening that I should stay away from him or I'll be doomed. Ilang beses ko nang iniwasan si Blake noon, sa kadahilanang ang mga nobya niya ay ayaw sa akin. Kinakausap ko lang siya kapag nababalitaan kong hiwalay na sila ng mga nobya niya.
"Gabi na, Anna. Pumasok ka na." untag niya sa akin pagkalipas ng ilang minutong pagtititigan.
I nodded and gave him a small smile. Sinulyapan ko ang nakabukas pa rin na gate at nahuli si Baste na nanunuod pala sa amin. He quickly averted his gaze and walked away when I saw him watching us. Puzzled, I turned back to Blake.
"Okay..."
"Good night, Anna."
"Good night, Blake."
He nodded and gestured towards the waiting gate. Nag-alangan pa ako kung tuluyan nang papasok o hindi. In the end, I dragged myself inside.
"Anna?"
I turned to him. With the moon behind him, he stood very tall and very mysterious. The soft glow of the moon slanted across his face. Half of his aristocratic features were hidden from the shadows, and half glowed with strong masculinity with his dark eyes gazing at me.
I am no photographer but I suddenly had the urge to grab some camera and just take a picture of him, standing so strong and handsome and seducing. Nakasiksik ang isang kamay sa loob ng bulsa at ang sunog ng kaniyang mga titig ay bahagyang nagpanginig sa mga tuhod ko.
"Nothing..." he shook his head and murmured a curse under his breath. Confused, I continued staring at him.
"I-It's nothing... really. Good night, Anna."
I slowly nodded. Naghintayan pa kaming dalawa pero wala na akong nakuha pa sa kaniya. Defeated, I made a small wave and rushed inside the mansion before I could say anything that I know I would regret in the morning.