"What do you want?" Mrs. Hemmings growled she wrapped the robe she wore tighter around her body.
"I need to see Luke." I tried to push past her but she yanked me back outside.
"He's asleep." She scowled.
"No, he's not. Please let me in." I pleaded.
"I don't even know you." Mrs. Hemmings said harshly and shook her head.
"He does. Please let me in." I begged.
"I can't just let you in, I have no-"
"This is a life or death situation!" I yelled at her.
She stood there with a confused expression. "If this is your attempt to go have sex with my son-"
I grunted and just ran past her, I ignored her protests and charged upstairs.
I hurried to the bathroom door and banged with all my might.
"Luke!" I called through the door.
He didn't answer.
"Luke, its me. Maia." I yelled.
I knocked at the door loudly. Hoping this is not it.
Still no answer.
"Luke! Please." I pleaded.
Not a sound of response.
"Luke..." I breathed out.
I did not stop knocking.
Mrs. Hemmings appeared at my side and had an angry expression on her face. But it didn't matter.
I grabbed the door handle and jiggled it repeatedly.
It didn't budge.
I was already crying.
Past that.
I'm full on sobbing in front of Mrs. Hemmings, but it didn't matter.
"He's in there?" She asked quietly.
I nodded slowly.
"Luke. Please. Please. Come out." I whispered.
Nothing.
"Luke... please. please. please..." I repeated the word about twenty times before I aggressively kicked at the door. Startling Mrs. Hemmings.
"LUKE!" I yelled.
"Luke, please." I begged.
I was so scared right now.
What if I was actually too late?
What if he was actually gone.
I never got to say those three words to make him smile.
It wouldn't have been I love you.
No.
It would mean so much more.
But I said the first words that would mean something to the both of us.
"Luke..." I swallowed hard, "Let's start over." I whispered.
It wasn't that much important. But it was something I was willing to do.
I stood there next to the door. My hand still grasped the door handle and I chewed my nails on the other.
I knew I was wearing nail polish, but I was nervous.
I guess that it did calm me down, I wonder if it calms Luke down too.
I turned to look and Mrs. Hemmings, she still wore a confused expression.
Its like she didn't seem to care that much about the situation we're in. Like she doesn't believe me when I say that Luke was in there.
I cried. A lot.
Its been a few seconds and still nothing.
But as soon as the door opened slightly, I pushed it open all the way and jumped onto Luke.
He lifted my legs and wrapped them around his waist.
I cried into his shoulder and he did the same into mine.
I closed my eyes shut.
"Luke..." I whispered.
"Maia..." His voice was shaky.
"Let's start over."
He didn't respond, instead he rocked us back and forth.
My breathing was picking up past, I felt Luke's chest rise and fall with every deep breath he took and let out.
"I missed you." He mumbled.
"I love you." I blurted out.
"You do?" He croaked.
"Of course I do, you idiot." I sniffled.
I didn't mean the idiot part, I was just upset.
We just held each other. I tightened my arms around his neck, closing all the possible access between us.
This is real.
Luke was real.
I wasn't insane.
He's really here.
Here with me.
And here to stay.
"I love you too." He replied after a while.
Luke tightened his arms around me and silently wept into my shoulder.
"Don't you ever scare me like that." I muttered.
"I'm sorry." He croaked.
Luke slowly put me down so my feet touched the ground, but kept hugging me.
We rocked side to side, not letting go.
I held him closer, like if I didn't keep a strong grip, I'd lose him forever.
Luke pulled away and pressed our foreheads together.
I opened my eyes to meet his blue orbs. God, I missed them like crazy. they were just so mesmerizing.
But they were different. They weren't their electric blue, they were dull and gloomy.
I took notice that his skin was paler. He had dark circles and bags under his eyes. His eyes were red, puffy and bloodshot.
This is real.
He's real.
And hurt...
Luke raised a hand and cupped the side of my face. His thumb grazed over my tear-stained cheeks.
"You're really here, right?" He asked quietly.
I nodded and tried to at least force a smile, but my lips wouldn't leave its frown.
Luke's eyes shifted between my eyes and lips.
My eyes scanned over his features.
He was actually hurt.
Luke was upset without me?
Mrs. Hemmings cleared her throat behind me and I quickly pulled away from Luke, but he kept a grip on my hand, I liked how he didn't completely let go.
I turned around to face Mrs. Hemmings who had a disappointed expression on her face.
"Luke, is it true?" She hugged herself. "Were you really about to-"
"Mom...." Luke cut her off and shook his head. Clearly not wanting to have this conversation with me around.
I cocked an eyebrow at him and slowly walked further in the bathroom. Luke interlocked our fingers, so I wouldn't let go of him completely.
Luke and his mother were arguing but I was too distracted by the number of wine bottles that laid in front of the bathtub.
There was broken glass crystals everywhere. I assumed that the sound of shattering glass was because of the wine bottles he crushed on the floor.
My eyes traveled up to a broken, ceramic ashtray with ashes and a couple cigarette butts laying around it.
Next to the fragmented ashtray was an empty pack of cigarettes.
It wasn't long until I saw four pill bottles, all opened with a few pieces scattered on the tiled floor.
If a few pieces weren't lying around, the bottles would've been full, I didn't know how much he was going to take until he thought that it was enough. But I didn't know want to either.
"How arrogant could you be?" Mrs. Hemmings scolded. "Would you have considered how I felt about this?"
"I have, and I know that you'd hardly shed a tear if I ever left." Luke yelled back.
I flinched as his grasp on my hand grew less comforting and more stiff.
My gaze on the pills did not break, but I listened to what they said.
"I would care!" She defended.
"No, no you wouldn't." Luke countered back.
"Don't tell me that she's actually the reason why you didn't do it!" Mrs. Hemmings said coldly.
"What if I told you that she was?" Luke said, quieter than just a few seconds ago.
"Honey, no." I heard glass crack as she moved closer, "no offense but you're more than that." She whispered, almost like she didn't want me to hear her.
I didn't want to just stand here and listen to her. I pried Luke's hand off mine and walked out, I didn't respond to Luke's calls.
I was at the bottom of the stairs before I stopped moving.
What ever happened to starting all over?
I could hear Luke getting scolded at.
I heard him scream through tears.
I can only imagine how he must've felt.
You came to stop him and now you're just leaving?
Their yells were now incoherent to me. I couldn't make out what they were saying.
I heard a door slam shut. There was a long silence.
What is wrong with me?
How could I just leave him after thinking I was never going to leave his side.
I heard the creaking of the stairs and footsteps grow louder, I turned around to face Luke.
"You didn't leave?" He stopped halfway down the stairs. He twirled his pinky ring around his finger like he used to.
"How could I?" I shrugged and shook my head.
Luke made no effort to come closer so I did. I ran up the stairs and collapsed into his arms. He was stiff but soon slowly settled into the embrace, he rested his chin on top of my head. Engulfing me with the rest of his body.
"Mom took my pills away. She clearly doesn't trust me with them anymore." He chuckled.
The sound of his chuckle gave me shivers down my spine. It felt good to be with him again. He filled the empty void, I've been denying I still had, that existed in my heart.
"How do you do that?" I pulled away slightly and looked up and him, knitting my eyebrows in confusion.
"Do what?" He smirked.
"Do... this." I gestured towards him.
"I still don't know what you're talking about." He raised his eyebrow but the smirk stayed.
"Change from a sobbing mess on the bathroom floor to a less depressed and more happier state?"
His smirk dropped, he stared at me with a blank face so I couldn't read what he was thinking.
There he does it again, he changed his mood with the snap of a finger.
"Are you mad at me?" He asked, his eyes were glassy. I saw that tears still stained his cheeks.
"No." I groaned and nuzzled my face back into his chest.
"I'm sorry." He chuckled.
He did it again.
"For what?" I mumbled against his shirt that was damp with my tears.
"For... you know..." He struggled to find the words.
"For almost taking away one of possibly only two things I really cared about?" I said, putting it in a less depressing way.
"What's the second?" He asked.
"I'm still thinking."
Luke patted my messy hair down and stroked my back.
"Let's start over." He whispered in a raspy voice.
"Yeah."
We just stayed there, enjoying each other's presence, because that's the only thing that mattered right now.
I thought about the other times we were together, how we never thought that our friendship would change into something more, with a twist, and I remembered our first kiss.
"Luke?"
"Yeah?"
I looked up at him with a smirk, "You still owe me that date." I giggled.
Luke playfully rolled his eyes at me and pulled us back into an embrace. "Waters, shut up and hold me right now."
I giggled, because Luke could take me to the cemetery and call it a date and I wouldn't care, as long as I was with him.
"You're really here?"
"Luke, why wouldn't I be?" I groaned, not understanding why it was so hard to believe.
I know that its been months, but he acts as if we haven't seen each other for years.
"Because they're back."
"What are?" I asked, confused by his statement.
"My hallucinations, at least... that's what Janet called them."
"Janet?" I pulled away.
"My therapist." He mumbled.
It was now all falling into place.
Luke never showed up to his sessions, Janet always had to rearrange her plans. The squawking mother was Mrs. Hemmings. Janet gave him those pills. Its been months but he showed up only twice. Janet was growing hopeless with his case because he never got out of bed. He was the broken kid.
Luke was broken.
"Janet, as in Janet Daniels?" I raised an eyebrow at him.
"Yeah, why?"
"She's my dad's fiancée." I said quietly, soon realizing I gave out something else. I never told him that Mom left us.
"Fiancée?" He asked.
I nodded.
Luke gnawed on his lip ring. God, I missed how he did that, I guess he was resisting the urge of asking more.
We stared at each other. Eyes locked.
Luke soon broke the silence we fell in, "Can I kiss you?" His voice cracked at the end.
I looked at him, thinking if starting over meant starting our friendship over, or the love we developed for each other.
I ran my hands up his chest and locked my fingers at the back of his neck, entangling them in the ends of his hair.
I nodded and he slowly pulled me in for a nice, passionate kiss.
The cool of his lip ring tickled against my bottom lip, I didn't want to move too fast. I quickly pulled away and rested my forehead against his. I wanted more, but I couldn't.
With no objection, Luke just stared at me with a small smile tugging on his lips.
I looked at him... and, God, was he beautiful.
Not just beautiful on the outside, but on the inside too.
The way he thought of things and the way he viewed life amazed me.
He may be broken, but he was like a bird.
Caged by the owners and forced to sing.
He grew weak but wore the smile everyday just to hide it.
I love him.
He was strong yet wearing out.
He has viewed the world with smart eyes.
He spoke so beautifully about things in life.
But when the world turned their back on him for a mere second he turned dark and gray.
Creases appeared on his faces.
His smile changed into a frown.
His eyes lose their vibrant color.
His pink lips were chapped.
His skin grew paler.
His mind set free the dark side.
But when the world turns back around, he changed back.
I was the only one, other than his mom and friends, that has seen both sides of him.
The little bird sang its lungs out.
But only we have seen it weep and sob under the blanket thrown over the cage.
The beautiful bird broke its own wings.
Disabling its ability to escape.
It didn't want to try anymore.
It decided to just lie there, with a broken smile.
Waiting for the end to swallow it up and disappear.
Luke was a rare flower.
He was almost impossible to find.
He was strong and breathtaking but symbolized sadness.
He was a rare bird.
A rare flower.
And my favorite kind.
I love Luke.
-
LUKE IS HERE GUYS CRY WITH ME.
but sorry if you disliked how i changed the technique of writing slightly.
i just didn't want this book to stay not so meaningful. i wanted change.
the last part got cheesy but... oops? no double update today. sorry guys :(
2K reads :))
I LOVE YOU DUDES :-)
- mack <3