I saw the world a couple times, tried to cure the ache with absence
But that hole was still a hole and my mind kept playing tricks on me
Feeling older every day, took everything I had to not crash and burn
~ Asking Alexandria, Alone in a Room
Avril's POV
"This will be the first time I've seen them perform since they joined the record label." I turn my head slightly to look at Erik's aunt, Rosannie.
She is a bit shorter than me, even with her ageing hair piled high in an elegant bun.
"Really?" I was quite shocked to hear her saying it, from what Erik told me they were rather close.
"They never performed in Chicago once they signed, I think they were hoping to keep Samantha from her old crowd by doing so. Usually, I would drive or fly out to them depending on where they were."
"He talks very highly of you." I smile at her, being around her is calming and soothing.
She gives off both a motherly vibe and a nursing vibe.
I felt like if I had any problems I could entrust them to her, something I was never able to do back in Boston.
"I would hope so, he has my name on him." Rosannie scoffs and shakes her head, "I told him no tattoos and what does he do as soon as he turns sixteen, gets my name inked on him like that will make everything better."
"He does love his ink." I laugh as I watch the band walk away with Erik's chest full of art on display.
He turns to look at the two of us sitting in lawn chairs behind the stage.
Pretty sure they are for the band but their asses aren't in them.
"What are you two laughing about?" he asks with a raised eyebrow.
"You," I answer cheekily.
"Oh great, Mum, don't embarrass me." He says as he walks over, "I'm fucking serious."
"Leave your Mom alone, she was telling me about your first tattoo and I made a comment about the rest of your tattoos." I roll eyes at Erik's behaviour, "calm down she hasn't told any awkward teenage stories yet."
"He has a ton of those." Rosannie chimes in.
"Mum." Erik gives her a pointed look, "I am thirty, that means we can skip those."
"I'm married to an old man." I cringe causing Erik to roll his eyes at me, "c'mon Erik I am bonding with my mother-in-law."
"Fine." He mumbles before giving each of us a kiss on the cheek and heading back to the stage.
I turn to look at Rosannie, "I am sorry that we never got to meet and you couldn't be at the wedding, everything just happened so fast."
"You don't need to apologize, I am just happy that you both are happy. Never apologize for loving someone no matter the time you've spent together, love knows no time."
I smile at her words because they are so true, looking back at my last relationship, we were together ten years and never once did I feel like I do when I am around Erik.
"He's an amazing guy. He's so supportive and understanding, I truly didn't think any of this would have happened when I agreed back in October." I tell her truthfully, she deserves to know just how amazing her son is especially with how his life started out with his biological mother.
"I'm happy to hear that, I always worried about the two of them. The odds were always stacked against them, both having a family history of addiction and a single mother who was never home. I still worry even though they are both grown." I can hear the anger in Rosannie's voice as she speaks.
"I can't imagine the pressure that was on you." I grab her hand with mine and squeeze.
If there is something I learned from Erik it's that simple gestures can bring a world of comfort.
She smiles down at my hand, "I was so happy the day they were discovered, and that the money and the hours they spent were finally going to pay off. The five of them worked their asses off to pay for this dream so to finally see them on stage with a crowd of adoring fans feels like a weight can be lifted off my chest."
She doesn't bring up the fact her own daughter isn't here on the stage with her bandmates.
"How is Samantha?" I ask with caution.
I have barely heard anything about her in the last few months.
Erik hasn't directly talked to her since Christmas as far as I know and anything he does know has come from Rosannie.
"She said she was coming today but I haven't seen her or gotten a text from her."
"None of us knew that."
"I'm not surprised, I'm worried about her even though she seems to be doing better. I feel like each phone call is either going to say she's had a relapse or worse and I know it's going to happen one of these days. I've seen so many people in the same boat as her die in the ER as we try to reverse the effects of alcohol."
I sit there in silence, unsure of what to say to Rosannie; she is already grieving her daughter.
I pull her into a side hug.
"Thank you, Avril." She returns our awkwardly situated hug, but the feeling doesn't convey the awkwardness; instead it feels like a mother's hug, as cheesy as that sounds.
A sense of warmth, acceptance, and hope surrounds me and I only hope that Rosannie feels it too.
"We should head up before they come looking for us and force us on stage." I unravel myself from her embrace and stand up, offering my hand to her.
"They wouldn't."
"Oh they would and they have." I laugh as I lead my mother-in-law up the steps to the back of the stage where she will be able to watch for the first time in five years.
"Was it Lucas? That sounds like something he would do."
"I think it was." I stop off to the side so that we can see the crowd, but they can't see us, "are you ready?"
"I'm ready to see my babies fulfil their dream." Rosannie grabs ahold of my hand as the boys begin to play their hearts out like they do in every show.
Rosannie knows every word to their music and is singing right along; she even knows some of Kyle's moves and is copying him.
She brings a whole new energy to the rather energetic bunch.
You would never think she just came off a twelve-hour shift at the hospital and only powered nap this morning.
"So is that it?" Rosannie asks as the band leaves the stage and we follow closely behind so the stage crew can start to pack this stage up.
"No, they have one more band on the main stage, do you want to go watch them or are you all rocked out?" Erik asks his aunt as we head to the bus.
"I could watch one more band."
We change our direction and head for the main stage to see Silverstein.
"Kyle and Devon, have you been in touch with your parents a lot?" Rosannie asks as she falls in step with them.
"Yeah, we called them yesterday and talked with them." Devon answers as Kyle chugs a can of Monster tour water.
"How are they liking Hawaii?"
"Good, they are still upset that they missed the tour, but they had already booked the vacation back in September and weren't able to change the dates."
Lucas looks down at his feet as they talk about their family and parents who accept them.
"Lucas, I brought you some homemade chocolate chip cookies and some other snacks. Erik was telling me about how much you were complaining that you hadn't had any of my baking in a while." Rosannie pulls him into a hug as we stop towards the outskirts of the crowd, "my baby boy, how I've missed baking for you."
I smile at the two of them, I am happy to see Lucas getting the motherly attention he deserves.
What I have learned throughout the day is that Rosannie is a mom to all four of these boys and at one point or another they had been living with her when things got tough at home.
She has become a safe space.
"You better share those twat." Kyle comments from beside them.
"Fuck off shortie."
"Oh my boys, I've missed you all so much."
Erik wraps his arms around my waist and rests his chin on my shoulder as we wait for Silverstein to take the stage.
"Hello Chicago, I hope everyone had a great day! We have a special guest here to sing their new song, many of you know her as a former member of Fallen Angels, Scarlett!" A tour employee says as they take the middle stage.
"What the actual fuck?" Erik asks and I can hear the rest of the band in an uproar.
"What the fuck is she doing?"
"When did she start writing music?"
"This is bullshit, I thought she was done with music?"
I look at Rosannie to see her reaction but she is as shocked as the rest of us.
"Thank you to Warped Tour for letting me perform on such short notice. I am going to be performing my new single that will be coming out in the next few weeks. I wrote it after I had relapsed again and I was starting another therapy session with people just like me. I wrote this for the ones struggling like me, no matter what their demons are." Scarlett's hair is cut short and is bleach blonde, no more colours.
She's handed a guitar and a chair where she sits down, and starts to strum away to her new single, "I've been away, a little while, sometimes I just can't help myself/when my mind's running wild, I seem to lose grip on reality."
Looking at Erik, I can see his jaw is set into place and that he's trying to control his breathing.
"She didn't fucking write that song, I did."
Edited by GirlReader133