"If it isn't love, why does it feel so good?"
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Hoseok's heart was breaking.
A piece of it broke off with every thing that happened, from his girlfriend's blank looks to her painful words.
Oh right, she's not his girlfriend anymore.
She was packing her clothes into suitcases, preparing to leave the apartment they shared.
Hoseok just couldn't comprehend, just couldn't believe this was actually happening.
Sure, they were getting into arguments more than ever and the slight animosity made the many typical activities in their lives very awkward.
But Hoseok didn't want this, he never saw this coming.
He slouched against the bedroom doorway, watching the person he adores so much, ready to leave him.
"Y/N please, this isn't necessary. Can we talk? We haven't even discussed this properly."
Y/N scoffed, aggressively folding clothes and chucking them into one of her suitcases.
"Yeah yeah, holding on to me just when I'm about to leave you. How romantic."
Her recent toxicity and Hoseok's fiery outbursts made their relationship hard to keep together.
Hoseok had never seen her act the way he has for the years that they've been together.
He didn't know why she would get snappy, or agitated or not bothered to spend time with him.
If he'd ask, she'd mock him and that irritated him.
Irritated him a lot.
So he knows that he's partly at fault to this (to Y/N, it's fully) but he can't believe that she would just walk out like this...
Throwing in the towel and leaving.
"Y/N I'm serious, stay and we can work things out. If you actually tell me what's wrong then we can fix it, can't we?"
Another scoff, another eye roll, another internal oh here we go again.
"I just don't... We aren't in love. I don't think I am anymore, I just don't. And let's be real, I doubt you still love me either."
She zipped closed the suitcase and got another, smaller one from under the bed, thankfully not as dusty as the former.
"Wait." He grabbed her arm firmly but not tight enough to hurt her.
"If it isn't love, why does it feel so good?"
Y/N groaned, her head tilting upwards so she could look at the ceiling in annoyance.
"Oh my days, it's called lust you—"
"No I'm not talking about sex. Why does it feel so good when I see you smile, see you laugh, see you deep in thought and see you spacing out? Why does it feel so good when we talk about the most random things and have the most deepest conversations? Why does it feel so good when you're the only one who understands me when no one else can? Why does it feel so good when you care for me like no other? Why does it feel so good, if it isn't love?"
Y/N was stunned, shocked, surprised.
She wasn't expecting those words at all and didn't know how to act in response.
Hoseok's heart cracked more and more, brittle pieces falling down to his feet, so fragile that they just won't stop falling.
Silence is sometimes worse than words.
"...Yeah... I get it, we haven't gotten along for past few weeks, probably a month now but have we actually sat down and talked? Instead of battling each other with words and dirty glances? Instead of letting the awkwardness suffocate us?" He continued, after the lengthy silence.
Y/N's eyes softened, guilt starting to surface as she slowly pulled her arm out from Hoseok's clutch.
She looked down at the floor, dejection and an oncoming headache to hurt her too.
Hoseok's pointer finger hooked around her chin, gently pushing her face upwards so that Hoseok could look into her eyes.
Guilt, sadness... but not the sparks of joy and warmth he used to always, always, see.
He knew that even if this caused her to stop for a moment, caused her to feel some sort of sympathy and think logically, they would still break up.
He wanted to know, when this all started.
Why this all started.
"...can't you tell me what's wrong with me at least?"
The End ♥️
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Notice: updates will be very irregular (and scarce) until after the middle of June due to exams. I hope you all are doing well and stay tuned! <333