YO! Just wanted you guys to know this is going to be a lonnggg chapter... lots of drama. So buckle up. Also be aware of time jumping back and forth because that will happen for this chapter and the next.
Enjoy! And don't forget to Vote! Comment! Share!
Ps. I literally ignored my project that's due tomorrow for this! And it's 3 am.. school is in 5 hours.
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I was surrounded by a never ending darkness that resembled the nighttime sky, but unlike the sky when the sun sinks down into the horizon, it didn't leave behind the glowing lights of the stars that always linger. It was just dark.
A darkness that had the strong presence of loneliness camouflaging into it, mixing the two so they they could form as one. Form into one deep, unsettling feeling that embedded itself inside me and even out, sticking to the surface of my skin, making me feel so very alone.
I was just sinking into the depths of it, unable to breath in as I opened my mouth, desperate to have oxygen pour into my burning lungs. I couldn't breath. I couldn't suck in any air although my entire body was begging on its knees for me to do so.
Where was I?
Was I detached from earth and put in space? Was I just a floating corpse who slowly suffocated at the lack of breathable oxygen in this light deprived void?
And suddenly this soundless pit of emptiness I wandered about was gone, a blaring siren ripped through the eerily quiet atmosphere, grasping me with two large hands and yanking me by the throat back into reality, and out of the protective darkness designed solely for the purpose of shielding me. However, the damage was indeed done, and the measures being taken to ensure that the further parts of my mind remain sane was pointless.
It didn't matter how short those few moments were, they were engraving itself in my mind and seeping into me, infecting me with a poisonous, ominous venom. Such a venom that had the power to make or break me, and it was up to me completely to decide just how much of an impact this would have on me.
But that wasn't exactly true, because not all of us can help how we feel, or change the way we process a tragedy. Life was life, humans are humans, and we will do just what we all eventually do, fall helplessly into the darkest parts of our mind.
"Hey! Are you ok? Ma'am, I need you to breathe."
That's when my eyes flew open, staring face to face at the middle aged medic whose warm touch heated up the area around my shoulder, alerting me that I was far from the darkness of space and instead in the darkness of Earth.
And the only reason my head grew light as a feather and why it felt like a noose was choking me, was all due to the fact I was in the midst of a full blown panic attack. The chills sweeping up my back and causing me to shake like a leaf in the wind wasn't because of the freezing air, it was because of the lost of control I had over my body to prevent myself from trembling.
God. Oh, God.
How could she do that? Why did she do that? There's so many other ways to get help. And Asher, the stranger who has the face of my brother, proved to be more dangerous and threatening than I've ever imagined. Goes to show how little I truly know about the ones I love, makes me wonder if Alice's secret is as eye-opening, and not in the good way.
"The girl jumped off this bridge and into the river? Let's go get a rescue team to search the water," A deep voice ordered, becoming mumbled as I felt my eyes droop shut without a say in the matter.
The siren blaring and the lights flashing blurred in the background, all sound seemed to quiet down, as if there was a knob for life being twisted around to lower the volume. And pretty soon, only one dysfunctional voice reached my ears before little black dots faded my sight black.
"Sadly, that isn't necessary, the girl landed on the rocks."
***
(Hours Earlier)
I stood in front of a two story brick building that was red, it was clear each year that passed left the bricks to do nothing but fade into a washed up red and crack apart. This building definitely had years on me and it did not age well, it appeared to be worn down by years of neglect and improper care.
I couldn't examine the building completely because of the lack of headlights shining, that was the only source of light around this isolated spot in the woods. There was more than a dozen cars parked and doubled the amount of people loitering around. Many of these individuals were leaning on the hoods of their cars, a cigarette or joint lit between their fingers, the tip glowing orange as they smoked.
I pried my attention off the beady-eyed people staring me down, deciding to settle my sight strictly upon Ricky's back as I trailed him. It felt as if one regular step for him was two long steps for me, or maybe he was just putting extra speed in walking because of how much I offended him. I didn't blame him at all. I too would be incredibly offended if someone thought the worst of me when I only had good intentions.
"Damn, shorty, come wrap those legs around me," a raspy voice crudely flirted, so I briskly walked pass the chunky guy.
Ricky said not to wander off and I definitely did not want to. At least I could trust him not to assault me, sexually of course. But did the perverted eyes on these grown men send me the same message? Nope.
A gust of chilly wind caressed the bare skin on my legs and swept up my skirt, not enough to flash anyone but enough to leave someone with a very imaginative mind to stir up lustful fantasies. I spared no time in pushing my navy skirt back into place and shielding away skin that didn't need to be expose.
A prolonged wolf whistle of interest broke out into the eerie night, my heart speed immediately went up at the unwanted attention that sought me out. Once again, I pushed my legs to work faster, hoping to avoid it all. That was until the end of my skirt was tugged, making me go into the direction I was pulled to, just so my skirt wouldn't go down.
I gasped as the person's frosty fingers skimmed over the back of my thigh, making my eyes fling out from their sockets in shock at such a bold move. When I was able to face the individual, I locked my sight upon the person's pitch-black eyes with voluminous lashes that seemed like they were salon made, and their slim long nose filled with freckles, and their full lips painted a blood red.
"Aren't you just the cutest thing I've ever seen around here," an older woman smirked, letting her hand drop from me. "Isn't that right, Devin?"
That's when I realized an arm draped over her shoulders, following that arm, I was met with a middle-aged white man that looked about her age. He had on a puffy blue jacket, blue ripped jeans that were covered in dirt, and boots that were scratched up.
The man set his sight upon my face, slowly dragging his eyes to my chest and then to my skirt, halting at the edge of it. "I'd love to see what's under that skirt of yours, child." He grins at the thought, stepping closer to me as he digs into his coat pocket.
I instinctively took a step back from what I perceived to be a threat, staring over to the location I last saw Ricky, but he disappeared from the spot. I guess he thought I was still trailing behind him like a lost kitten.
A thump sucked me out of my thoughts, I instantly brought my eyes to the source of the noise, finding a pack of cigarettes beside my feet. I stared up, feeling my face straining as I could detect their eyes already on me, which added layers of discomfort to stack on itself.
"Be a kind girl and bend over to get that," the man smiled provocatively, now only a feet away from my face.
"Don't worry, I'll promise to keep my hands to myself this time," the lady says, stepping closer to me as well.
I gulped, shaking my head side to side. I backed away from the two, eyeing them to see if they would approach me again and they tried, this time I wasn't going to stay in place. I slipped by them before the man's hand could slither under my skirt, which it made an attempt to do so, no shame at all for his appalling actions.
My shoes smacked against the dirt on the ground as I raced towards the building, and at that moment, I couldn't tell if I was running from danger or running to it.
Cruel laughter rang out from those individuals, and even from the others watching with no commentary. It was hard to process how they found a situation with a girl getting harassed by a older couple funny. It was completely embarrassing and awful in my view. But I guess since they weren't the victim and target of humiliation, they were more than fine assessing it as entertainment, as if I were just a funny show playing on their television.
"Oh, come on, doll! We were just playin', no need to run!"
I snaked around multiple people who formed into big groups, trying my best to slip by quickly without bumping into anyone. I'd managed to navigate through the sea of people just well, but as my luck proved time and time again, was I wasn't lucky, at least not recently. My shoulder accidentally collided with another, causing what the person held in their hand to be free of their grip, now able to know the effects of gravity as it soon would meet the solid ground.
Glass shattering into million of pieces met my hearing, causing me to cringe at what I just caused.
"So sorry," I muttered, squeezing by the little space provided for me to get through.
"Dumbass thot, my fucking drink!" A girl's fierce voice complained in pure aggravation, but I didn't stare back once.
I scurried by like a tiny mouse, popping out from the crowd and finally reaching the front of the building. It wasn't a gracious arrival, I was falling in point 5 seconds as my shoes rubbed together unexpectedly, resulting in me stumbling forward. I placed my hands in front of me to cushion my fall, realizing it was a mistake as my injured hand met impact.
Intolerable pain spread, pain that felt as if a knife was plunged into my hand in a savage manner, being twisted in every way possible to rip apart my delicate skin. The throb occurring just added to the fuel, making it feel like that same knife was being yanked out and stabbed back in, this happening in an endless, torturous loop.
I winced horribly at the pain, pushing myself up and heading towards the building once again. My round eyes roamed over the dangerous place, giving myself the quest of locating Ricky. Wow, I never thought I would ever go out of my way to find him.
Suddenly, a giant hand clamps down on my right shoulder, squeezing with an unpleasant amount of pressure as they turned me around. I locked my sight upon bone-chilling blue orbs, ones that were not amused at my disappearance in the slightest degree.
"I clearly told you not to fucking wander off when we got here, and you did just that. Do it again and I'll leave you here in a heartbeat to fend for yourself, and trust me when I say, you wouldn't be safe with the company of these people," Ricky scowled, his dark brows crunching as he glared down at me.
His wounding gaze had me dropping my eyes from his, which he did not like. He roughly shook my shoulder that he was still holding onto, making me jerk back and forth as I reconnected my sight with his, frowning uncomfortably. I whined out my disapproval like a bratty kid rebelling against their parent.
I was just physically assaulted by some old couple, I didn't need it from him too. However, his hand shot up to my face, gripping my chin with his index finger and thumb as he brung me closer to him.
"Damn it," he grunted in frustration. "I am not a fucking babysitter, do not act like a child. You're a teenage girl. Use your words and grow a backbone, because people will continue to step all over you if you don't," he criticizes me without mercy. "You're a doormat."
Hot anger still glimmered and crackled in his eyes like a dying fire, still able to defrost his customary icy stare I was accustomed to. I was more than positive that he was biting off my head for not what happened now, but what happened earlier. I had to apologize. I was going to ignore him lashing out and use my words to say sorry.
"I'm really sorry, Ricky. I never met to offend you," I sincerely apologized, using a delicate, mellow tone as I gave him unwavering eye contact.
My cold face nipped by the coolness of tonight faded away, the pleasurable warmth from Ricky's hand kept my chin from frosting. I guess there was irony somewhere in that. He's always so cold, detached, and distant but his touch is anything but that, it's warm and comfortable.
He squinted his observant eyes that roamed my face, pulling my chin up more. "Some words are meaningless without actions to back them up."
I furrowed my eyebrows at this, staring at him with evident confusion. Was my apology not enough? What kind of actions are going to prove I'm sorry in a situation like this?
He removed his index finger and thumb from my chin, stepping back to create a decent amount of space between us.
"Do refrain yourself from straying away again," he advised me, this time slowly pivoting on his feet and walking away at an impossible pace for me to lose.
Without giving it much thought, I made the choice to join him at his side. I could feel his eyes glance over, causing my skin to burn from his intense stare that could drill a hole through me. His lips never made an attempt to open in order to make a comment, only did he continue on without faltering his steps.
We approached the entrance, ceasing further movements as the buff security guard stepped in our way. The giant surpassed me in height, towering over me and even Ricky, in fact, the guy was taller than anyone here. His biceps were wider than my whole head, and it basically seemed as if he was a steroid on steroids.
"What's the password?" The guy's gruffly voice asked.
Ricky appeared annoyed as he narrowed his eyes, running his sight up and down the individual in a belittling manner. He took a step forward to the guy's chest, no hesitation about it, and turned his head up to match the guy's challenging stare.
"It's Ricky fucking Rodriguez," his frosty words shot out, an air of smoke exiting from his mouth due to the cold outdoors.
The guy sneers at his attitude, his upper lip curling up in disdain. "Not the fucking password."
"I don't have a clue to what dumb fuck hired your ass for me to pay your salary and not know who I am, but let me tell you how this is going to go down-" Ricky's deathly tone heightens the intensity of this confrontation around us, but another voice interjected halfway through his sentence, slicing through the tense atmosphere.
"Whoa, Whoa! Alright, don't mind this airhead," a chubby guy practically waddles from out the door, prominent gray hairs flying wildly from his head. "Little Ricky, it's been years since you last came here. I just assumed you would never come by and so I never informed any of the guards about you, my mistake."
The small man's eyes were a dirty brown as he stared up at Ricky, a kind smile forming on his lips. He seemed genuinely happy at Ricky's arrival.
"You thought I would never come back to the place I half own?" Ricky questioned the man's reasoning, not returning the kind smile being shown to him.
The small guy got the hint, his smile faltering before completely being wiped off his face. "Forgive me. When your father passed of cancer and left the gang in the hands of Issac... I know soon after he abandoned the position to marry his girlfriend and to leave behind the, ahem, conflicts between you, Noah, and Tamara, which ultimately led to the split of the Bashers. You made your own gang and moved headquarters to Boston, I just assumed you didn't want to stay in Bellton or have any part of it, including here."
Ricky's dad died of cancer? I thought Noah's friend said he died because guilt ate at him... I guess that was another way of putting it.
Despite me thinking it just wasn't humanly possible, Ricky's composure and facial features became even more cold, deadly cold.
"It wasn't my intention to prompt an answer from you that would discuss the past and my brother. Simply know I am here in Bellton for a purpose, and that's to take back what's mine. I've been here for a month and I don't plan on leaving this time."
It was actually sad when I thought about what the guy said. First, his uncle Giuseppe dies brutally by a drive by, then his dad passes away by cancer months later, next Noah and his then girlfriend leaves him, and then his own brother dumps him for a girl.... wow. I never really realized just how many people walked in and out his life. It must've been lonely and rough for a kid to deal with.
With that, Ricky collided his shoulder against the security guard's arm, walking pass him. I awkwardly scurried by, mumbling an excuse me as I did so.
"Wait... Tamara?" The guy questioned breathlessly, shock coating his voice.
I began to falter in my steps as I glanced back to catch a glimpse of the old man, watching as he analyzed each detail of my features.
"Pardon me, you have similar features to her."
Did I look like her? No one ever told me that.
Hmm.. but didn't Ricky say something like that too. Did I remind him of the girl he once loved and now hates?
"You remind me of a girl I use to know, a manipulative, conniving, puta of a girl."
I guess I did...
I noticed a bar where several adults and teens from my school were, mostly the kids associated in gangs, they had wads of cash in their hands. One man was throwing down money on the counter, sipping liquior that swished back and forth in his glass.
"I place 100 on Asher! Kid can pack a nasty punch," the man said.
The tall bartender with a white rag over his shoulder shook his head. "Too late to place bets now, but Tommy is making his own. Isn't that right, Tom?"
"Hell yeah I am. I'm betting that fellow called Christopher Sawyer is going to pull a dirty trick, probably gonna bring out a knife or something," Tommy guessed, his eyes caught in a spell that forbade him from tearing his sight away from whatever he was looking at.
I followed the path his eyes were glued to.
"I bet 100 he don't, Tommy. That Sawyer kid wants revenge for getting his jaw fractured last time but not murder revenge."
"Ooooo," multiple individuals shouted, the sound coming in every direction of the sea of people.
Asher and Sawyer?
I looked to the far right of this area, spotting a gigantic ring with two bloody and familiar faces. There in the center stood Asher, his eyebrow cut and dripping with blood and the same could be said about his busted lip, blood was flowing down that injury as he smeared it across his chin with the back of his hand. He was shirtless, leaving his built figure and six pack on display, and he had on baggy red shorts.
Sawyer, on the other hand, had dried blood staining the skin around his nose. As for his eyebrow piercing, it was tearing his skin apart and letting blood flow freely down his white skin. Unlike Asher, he had on a white tank top and blue baggy shorts.
And suddenly, it made sense now, why Asher wouldn't go into details about the fight he had with Sawyer and how he almost broke his jaw. He injured Sawyer that badly because there was no coaches present to stop it, there was no protection, or even rules. He was involved in underground fighting... why would he do something so reckless?
"You wanted to know the truth about the deal? Well, this is it," Ricky's hot breath blew against my ear as he talked.
And for the first time, I turned my head around and faced him, no fear attached to me as I did so. I stared dead into his eyes with a straight face, because right now, I couldn't begin to process how being exposed to the truth made me feel.
Asher... wow... Asher. He was a liar, a traitor, a hypocrite... I just couldn't believe it. He said he hated the gangs in Bellton, but here he was fighting in a ring for them to bet on him. Here he was, caught in a lie that he would've been so beyond angry if I did the same to him. He wanted my truths and honesty but he wasn't ready to exchange his.
Who was he? Who does he think I am that he could just easily look me directly in the eye and lie to my face? But I got the memo, he could lie to me whenever he pleased if it was convenient for him, I couldn't. Why the double standard?
My face heated up, probably shifting to a pinkish red as my eyes watered, not because I was sad or hurt... I mean, I was a little hurt. However, these burning tears devouring my sight as I watch the two boys circling each other was because of the humiliation and irritation bubbling inside my chest.
I guess Ricky was right, people really did see me as a baby who needed to be sheltered. Asher definitely saw me that way, why else wouldn't he tell the truth when I presented multiple opportunities for him to do so... multiple opportunities. I balled up my uninjured hand.
Gosh, so many chances. So many times he could've prevented all of this if he just would've looked me in the eye and told me the truth.
"Asher fights here at the ring and controls this business along with an old manager who used to run this place. He brings in lower level gangs to bet on fights, buy the drugs I distribute out, drink their miserable lives away, and most importantly, he prevents those gangs from ever threatening to become my or Noah's competition. This place brings in a lot of money to make everyone satisfied, and I don't have to do any of the dirty work," Ricky explains. "And in exchange, Asher receives a generous pay and remains untouchable, this including you and your family, to my gang and the Mortes. That's the deal."
Ah, so all he has to do is sell drugs illegally, serve drinks illegally because half these people were teens, and set or be involve in fights that have no supervision and lets anything happen. Absolutely wonderful, my darker self exclaims in false positivity.
Just how far could a fight go here? Death or seriously injured?
I find my eyes zeroing in on Sawyer's fist flying though the air, attempting to meet Asher's jaw before he dodged the attack.
"Just like I said, I can take you even with a broken hand!" Asher taunted his opponent, his brown, damp hair sticking to his sweaty forehead.
I barely heard what Sawyer snapped back with as the crowd grew more wild, Asher was now the one approaching his opponent, preparing to make an attack. He quickly stepped forward, using his good right hand in attempt to deliver an uppercut. His gloveless hand never collided underneath the chin of Sawyer, he was a hair away from completing the process when Sawyer stumbled backwards and avoided the sure to be knock out.
It appeared that whatever blow succeeded in withdrawing blood from Sawyer's nose was now having its affect, his eyes were blinking tightly, as if he was having a hard time keeping them open or focusing. Asher seemed unfazed, but that lasted for a short time before the next attack came for him. Sawyer had both his fists up high, using his good hand to strike as he put his whole body into the punch aimed at Asher's face, and easily did my brother bring his head back to miss the impact, however that wasn't Sawyer's true intentions. Before anyone could predict it, his body was much more closer to Asher's, which is why he was able to snatch my brother's injured hand and twist it in the wrong direction.
"You slimy motherfucker!" Asher bellowed out his displeasure, taken off guard by the attack.
The pain of his not fully healed hand contorted his face. All the emotions swirling in his eyes and showcasing from his face was revealed to all, gone was the tough mask that was replaced with a transparent one. And in one swift motion, Sawyer crashed his forehead to Asher's, successfully head-butting his opponent.
Asher's eyes glazed over instantly at impact, his head whipped backwards at the force as he staggered back. Sawyer wasn't affected in the slightest at the move that could've harmed him in the process, in fact, he was more energized at the upper hand he had. Before time allowed Asher to regain his composure, Sawyer jabbed my brother's throat with a solid fist.
And I swear, the same time Asher had his breath punched from him, I forgot how to breath. The function of my lungs halted and the air around me went into every other thrilled soul at the turn of events, but not me. People jumped with excitement, eyes filled with wild desire for blood as the anticipation grew.
Asher's good hand went to his throat as he gasped for air, his slim fingers rubbing along his Adam's apple. His stomach was violently contracting at the same time his chest was shaking fiercely, his lips parted open as if he was going to yell but it was just a desperate move to try and obtain air he couldn't get. He harshly dropped to his knees, his face burning red, not a trace of his normal skin tone showed through as his eyes glistened with the tears that came naturally.
"End him, Christopher!"
"Come on, Asher! Stand the fuck up!"
"Break his other hand!"
"Kill him!"
I whipped my head to guy beside me, the one known as Tommy was shooting up from the stool he occupied.
"Let's make this interesting," he smiled, a lightbulb shining above his head as he hits the guy he made a bet with.
"Interesting how?" The other man said.
"Like this."
The man pulled a small switchblade from his pants pocket, his conniving smile widening as he showed his friend. "Sometimes you gotta give things a little push for it to happen."
What the what was he planning?
The man swung back his hand before propelling it forward, letting the weapon in his grasp fly out and soar through the smokey air. The switchblade landed in the ring, right next to Sawyer's foot and his itching need to avenge himself.
"Kill him! Kill him! Kill him!" Tommy chanted with a sick grin, his fist up high and shaking.
I stared at him with my eyes pried open the widest it could be. What was wrong with him? What was wrong with the people joining in!? I know a mortified expression flashed through my features as I observed the people screaming, all of them wanting my brother's blood for their entertainment. What kind of sick people thought someone losing their life was fun to watch?
"Oh, my God! Oh, my God," my shaky voice squeaked out, panic tightening my chest.
Was no one going to stop this? I couldn't stomach the thought of seeing someone's light drain from their eyes, let alone watch that happen to my brother. If no one was going to put a stop to this, I would!
I shot out of my stiff stance, ready to put my foot down and drag Asher away from that slimy snake out for his blood. But I should've known my pretty little self wasn't going anywhere, Ricky's forgotten presence was no more as he wrapped a forbidding arm around my waist.
"Rule number one, no interrupting fights. Rule number two, you must place a bet before a fight begins. Rule number three, no clean cops," Ricky restrains me in a secure hold, but that didn't deter me.
Asher was a liar, not someone who deserved to be stabbed to death.
"Get off of me," I grunted. "Let me go!" I whined, effortlessly being slammed against his hard chest as he subdued me completely.
My feeble attempts were futile to the strength he used to keep me in place, but I kept wiggling and fighting back. I let my unwrapped fingers go to his warm hand that was grabbing my hip, letting my nails sink into his skin as I scratched him hard. A growl escaped from deep within his throat as he felt my attempt to be freed of him, and he wasn't too happy at my little trick.
His hand sprung onto my throat as I yelped, unfamiliar with this kind of contact. My whole body went rigid as I stopped scratching him, feeling his fingers add slight pressure around my windpipe.
"I like nails clawing at my back, not my hand. And as much as I like a girl who puts up a fight, now is not the time to grow a backbone with me, Anna. Just watch, Asher hasn't fought here for years to die like this," he assures me, his voice rather hoarse while he talks against my ear.
I bite my bottom lip, having to take Ricky for his word as I stare back up to the ring, but I instantly regretted it. Sawyer was swinging the knife around, trying to swipe the blade across Asher's chest, but he couldn't as my brother's heaving body was now up and ready to defend himself.
"Let's play dirty, son of a bitch!" Asher's throaty voice hollered throughout.
Moments after, his foot was on its way to introduce itself to Sawyer's right knee. Even though the crowd of people made it hard to hear a thing, the snapping noise of Sawyer's bones breaking had put the loud chatter to shame.
"FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER!" He screamed with a high-pitched sound, discarding the knife as he fell to cup his knee that had a bone protruding out.
A breath of relief found its way out my mouth, all was done. Asher was safe. There was no need to worry my head off, right? WRONG! Asher made the decision not to end it there, with his enemy on the floor defeated, instead he grabbed the black switchblade and the crowd went insane. People started to bang their fists on the bar counter, others raising their glasses in glee at what to come.
"Kill him! Kill him! Kill him!" The sea of spectators chanted once more, this time for my brother.
What? What? What!? And suddenly, I felt my heart flop to the floor as my stomach dropped, the feeling that I could just barf filled me. A transformation of what my brother could really be like was unraveling before me. The knife in his hand tightened and I just felt myself close my eyes, sighing as I did. It was this that he was hiding from me, and I just knew he didn't want me to see this, but I opened my eyes, struggling to accept what the cold truth had in store for me.
It was like a noose was tied around my neck, tightened to the point where I struggled to breath but enough to ensure that I did, ensure that I suffered before taking the big leap into all things nasty and vile, into all things destructive enough to sully and tarnish anything pure in sight. And as I saw that knife plunge into his opponent's side, I practically saw the foot of death kick my stool from my feet, leaving me to dangle in the air as all I knew came to an dark end.
Those bright baby blues used to twinkle and stare into the depths of my eyes with a childish naiveness when we were younger, now as teens they stare at me with a fierce need to protect and at the world with an adamant need to defend himself against all things unholy. But right now? Now they were a dull baby blue, the twinkle in his eyes diminished long ago as he glared directly at Sawyer with a murderous face.
There's just some lines you cross and can never come back from. This was it for me and him.
Blood rained down Sawyer's shirt, a circle of red forming on his white tank top. His jaw practically smacked down to the floor in shock, unable to do anything but stare dumbfounded as he brought his shaky hand to his wound.
"Trash like you deserve to die," Asher said, at least that's what I read from his lips.
He held Sawyer up by the shoulder, preventing him from falling over as he yanked the knife out of his side, tediously sliding the bloody blade down his chest, tearing open his opponent skin in the process. Then, in slow motion, I saw him pressing the blade against Sawyer's neck, slowly sinking the tip through his flesh.
I just couldn't keep the scream in, horrified to what he may do. "ASHER!" I shrieked, my volume higher than any other individual urging this barbaric act to go on further.
It was like my voice traveled solely to his ears as he turned his head a beat after, his eyes swimming through the sea of blood thirsty sharks. I made an attempt to step forward, but I forgot Ricky's arm was around me and he didn't make a single move to loosen his grip.
"Let him come to you, no need to go up there," Ricky reasons in his deep voice.
Asher dropped the knife in his bloody hand as he lets go of Sawyer's fainting body, causing the teenager to fall over, breathing rapidly in and out.
"And the winner is Asher Saint, or shall I say the merciless Saint. A true fighter til the end!" A guy's voice boomed through a speaker.
He slithered his body out of the ropes surrounding the ring, blood smeared on his stomach and bruised hands. He darted into the ecstatic crowd, his sight set on me until it shifted to Ricky. I could see his left eye twitch the way it did when he tried to repress his anger, but he had no right being mad at me. None.
I blinked once for less than a second, reopening them to find Asher's cut eyebrow and busted lip intensely staring at me, anger and shock forming together as one. His eyes scanned me top to bottom, finding my injured hand wrapped and Ricky's arm sliding off my waist.
Questions among questions arose in his mind, I could tell as he struggled to find the right one to ask.
"What happened to your...? How much did you...? Why is he...? Why the hell are you here?" He focused, snatching my arm in his bloody hand.
I was harshly pulled like a rag doll away from Ricky. My throat constricted at his touch, and my mind couldn't help but replay the moment he plunged the knife into Sawyer's side.
"No! Don't touch me!" I scowled, recoiling at the contact. "And don't you dare look at me like I just did something wrong," my voice wobbled uncontrollably, making me bite down against my teeth.
The people next to us turned their heads in our direction, interest filling their eyes at the drama.. more entertainment I suppose. My hands started to tremble as I took in more rapid breaths. I said it before and I'll say it again, I don't like confrontations and my body agrees.
His eyes turned hard, prying off of me even though it seemed like he had more to say on the matter.
"What the hell is this, Ricky? I'm in the ring fighting, running this place and doing my part better than ever before. Maybe last week and the one before weren't so great but that's on you," he lifted his hand. "Should've thought about profits then. But I'm back, more better, and bring in more money than this place ever seen. Why did you have to bring her here, huh? To scare me to do the shit I'm already doing?" Asher snaps, his chest rising and falling as his eyes darken with bitter hatred.
Ricky took a threatening step forward, his head inches from my brother's as they stared in a standoff, both face to face.
"Remember that I own this place and let you manage here because of the deal. I hold the power in here as much as I do outside, don't forget that or eles we'll have a problem. Although, the thought of seeing you with two broken hands does amuse me," Ricky's dark voice stated. "Now take your drama to the back, quarrling out here won't be good for business."
Asher's nostrils flared as he inhaled deeply, exhaling moments later in a rather harsh way, relunctantly stepping back from the person he knew pulled the strings in his world. He wasted no time snatching me by the elbow while never breaking his eye contact with Ricky, that was until the point he turned towards the bar.
He shoved a few people out of the way as we went into a hall located behind the bar, we came to a stop at a wooden door that was dented, as if someone kicked it. He slammed it open and shoved me in with his tainted, red hands.
"What happened? What did he do to you? Did he hurt your hand? I had no idea he would go after you because of me. That fucking dick," Asher growled, balling his fists and grinding his teeth.
I narrowed my eyes at his behaviors that made me back into the wall. This closet was not spacious and I felt like I could smell the blood drying to his skin. My breathing wasn't going back to normal as my ragged breaths continued as the seconds ticked away, he was too close, too angry. This aggression radiating off him was different, more vile and destructive, and it was no doubt cause of this place and the people in it.
Who was this kid who had the appearance of my brother?
"I asked him about the deal and he said he'll show me what it was.." I whispered at first. "I can't believe it. Who-who are you!?" I blurted in serious questioning, my voice growing in volume.
"You asked him to bring you here? Are you fucking stupid?! I told you about the deal! Why would you-"
"You lied to me! You didn't tell me about the deal! And maybe if you weren't lying to me, Asher, I wouldn't have been looking for the truth!" I now shouted, digging my fingers in my hair and tugging at the strands, stress hitting me like a truck.
I thought back to the knife digging into Sawyer's flesh, and that caused my tears to finally burst through the dam of my eyes. My face was flashing with heat.
"Y-you stabbed him. You were... oh, my god, you were gonna k-kill him!" I yelled, tears tumbling down my cheeks as I paced in this small area. "Am I crazy?" I said, pointing at myself. "Are you!? Tell me... tell me, you weren't actually attempting to murder him. Please?"
"See," he starts off, a sense of being right filling in the air. "I knew you couldn't possibly handle this shit. We don't live in a fairy land world, Anna, this is one of the darkest parts of life where you don't belong! I didn't tell you the truth to avoid this, ok? I was trying to protect you. Haven't you ever heard that fucking curiosity killed the cat?" He justifies himself, purposely not answering what I really asked him.
"Protect me or protect yourself? And how are you even protecting me by keeping me in the dark!" I countered, a salty tear making my mouth go bitter.
"Of course to protect you! And keep you in the dark? No. I was keeping you in the light, away from this dark shit, ok? This is the dark shit!" He fumed, pinching the bridge of his nose, which ultimately smeared blood onto it.
I grimaced at the sight. "Then answer me this, were you or were you not going to kill him before I said anything? I get that maybe you can try to justify doing all these illegal things to protect me, mom, and Dad from the gangs by fighting here... but I never heard Ricky say you had to kill anyone!" I coughed out, my itchy throat doing me no good, along with my rapid breaths.
"What?" He asked like I just said something crazy. "He was coming at me with a knife! What was I suppose to do?!"
I instantly replied, "Get the knife out of his hands, and you did, but you took the unnecessary step further to use it on him! You're no better! And part of me feels like you're slipping around my question because the answer is yes," my voice cracked. "And because it's a yes, it means you probably did that before... killed someone, right?" The coolness of my tears left cold streaks down my face, running pass my nose and dripping off my chin.
"Don't look at me like that. You think these people in here are making the world a better place and in a fight to end world's suffering? I never hurt anyone if they weren't trying to hurt me-"
"You took people's lives away. You're a murderer," I began to shake tremendously, every muscle in my body uncontrollably flexed and shook as this truth smothered me. "Just look at you, you're covered in blood. Who are you? Because you're not my brother, you may have his appearance, but you're not my twin. He would never, ever do such a horrible thing."
I sniffled, using my sleeve to wipe my runny nose. The anger twisting in Asher's hard exterior blew away at the impact of my words, shifting his steely blue eyes to soft vulnerable ones. And never in my 17 years of life did I see fear ever cross them like I did now. There was the true nature of his deceitfulness.
"Annalise, I am still your brother. Ok, j-just hear me ou-" he began to string up words, in the midst of rambling as I interjected.
I felt like vomiting, each deep breath I took had my stomach contracting horribly and my chest building with pressure.
"No, the time for you to talk is over. It's my turn now!" My unstable voice raised higher than I've ever let it be before.
"You're one giant hypocrite," I gritted through my grinding teeth, my lips pulling back into a pout despite my protest. "You relentlessly told me to stay away from Ricky and Noah, their gangs, their people. That-that they were dangerous, killers, drug sellers, always passing judgement upon them, but you're no different. You have blood on your hands! You have drugs flowing through here! And you are just as, or even more, dangerous as the people you've been staring down your nose at!"
"A-and n-news flash, you're worse than the gang members in the Mortes and Imperishables, because you run this place for both Noah and Ricky, doing their dirty work just like their members. You're affiliated with them, and you're technically a member of both their gangs if you think about it," I laughed insanely, my shoulders jerking back and forth.
How did he not see this before?
Maybe his brain got knocked out of him? He surely doesn't have one, nor is he using one, My darker inner self resurfaced to the light.
"Guess what, Asher? You never actually helped me, all you did was hurt me each and every time you lied to me when I did nothing but tell you all my truths! And instead of admitting your faults and apologizing for your actions, like a decent person would, you stand here in front of me trying to justify yourself. You say you were protecting me when all you actually did was hurt me, your own sister, just because you couldn't find the strength to tell me the truth about what you really do, who you surround yourself with, but most importantly, who you really are. Because you know I'd never accept it, and you know the only reason why I or our family would need protecting is because of the decisions you made, with people you knew to be lethal, corrupted individuals. This is the road you brung yourself down, and it took me with you and you can't deny it."
I gasped for air, squeezing my eyes shut as I refused to look at him and speak my mind. I knew what I said wasn't censored at all, and I hated the thought of seeing his already crumbling composure become completely destroyed because of me. But part of me had the desire to scold my own self, feeling terrible for heedlessly throwing my words out without consideration for how he felt. But how about how I felt? Did people even consider that?
Ricky was right. I had to speak up. I didn't want to be a doormat any longer. I didn't want people deciding what I should or should not know. I didn't want to be seen as the child who needed protecting by people I care about. And I didn't want to remain quiet anymore when someone was giving me half of what I'm willing to give them. Trust works both ways. Honesty works both ways. Communication works both ways.
This was it. Asher kept pushing me towards the edge, and eventually I was going to fall or I was going to jump. I'm pretty sure I did a combination of both.