There's been such a dramatic drop in active voters and commenters, super sad! But I appreciate you guys for staying :)
sorry for spelling errors this chap is way too long to proof read as I've got to go out
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The walk down to the beach was kind of tense. Luca was obviously a bit fatigued, and wasn't in the best of moods.
It also felt even more like we were being babysat. Mainly because Luca was older and less friendlier than Aaron.
The others kept on looking at their phones, apart from Nate and I because mine was broken, and Aaron had his.
Nate eventually slowed down and walked next to me making me grit my teeth awkwardly.
"Um, I'm sorry by the way." He said quietly and I forced myself to look at him.
"About....what?" I asked stiffly.
"I was being a bit manipulative by making you drink all that alcohol. I mean, it would have been my fault if you had drowned so, yeah, my bad." He apologised and I raised a brow at him.
"Apology accepted I guess, although I'm not that sure I would have drowned."
"Are you kidding me? That's why I said we shouldn't go outside. Do you know how many drunk people drown every year? A lot. You should really thank Aaron, he saved your life." He ranted and I made a face.
"Uhh, well, that's comforting."
"I mean, I totally would have tried save you, but I would have just drowned as well, so I couldn't help, sorry." He excused and I scoffed and shook my head at him.
"Well, I appreciate the thought."
"I mean, there was one point he surfaced without you because he couldn't find you in the dark. And I was like 'shit I'm a murderer', but then he found you. Lucky really." He continued and I made an even more disturbed face.
"Uhh, okay."
"Like shit man, I was scared even though I was completely out of it, don't know how Alex and Aaron must have felt."
"Okay Nate I get it."
"Damn, imagine if we couldn't find you and then your body just washed up in the mor-"
"Nate." I huffed at him and he started laughing.
Luca sighed. "Aaron obviously can't look after you all very well." He commented with a frown and I glared at him.
"Your opinion on 'looking after' is actually 'imprisonment' so you can't say anything. Besides, none of us are minors anymore it's not his responsibility to control what we do. Most of us take responsibility for our own actions instead of looking for someone else to blame like you." I fired and he looked taken aback.
The only sound was footsteps and gulls for a few moments.
"Hangovers amirite?" Alex eventually commented and I sighed as we reached the wall of the port.
I stayed standing angrily with my arms crossed on the wall while the others made their way down onto the beach.
Shit, I am moodier than usual.
I watched Luca just lean with his arms crossed against a boulder, while the others started climbing over the large rocks and small ledges.
"Fuck! Asshole!" Hunter's voice sounded from around a rock, and Alex squeeked a moment later after the sound of something splatting.
"No going in the water!" Luca called after them, and sighed.
I jumped down from the wall and then slowly made my way along the beach while watching him.
He seemed to contrast against the younger brothers a lot, and I failed to believe age was the only reason for that. He probably won't age well with the rate he's going.
His almost curly blonde hair moved restlessly in the seaside wind as he stared ahead of him with a worried expression.
He looked like he was grieving, wearing a black coat and a solemn face, and I felt a flush of cold guilt travel up my chest.
I hate the way I feel about him. I want to hate him. I want to never look back.
But here I find myself leaning next to him, wanting to pardon him of everything he's done and go back to the way things were.
Ugh, I'm so pathetically desperate for affection.
He didn't say anything as he almost glared at the sea, but I could tell he knew I was there by the way his head tilted towards me.
I blushed at my inability to speak before staring at the sand with furrowed brows.
What do I even say.
"I'm sorry." He eventually spoke up, and I felt my heart pound in my chest.
You're stronger than this.
"It's going to take a lot more than that." I forced myself to say calmly, and his pale eyes turned to look at me completely.
I feel like I haven't seen his face in years.
He opened his mouth then sighed, and frowned. "I..." Another sharp exhale. "I thought, that it was the right thing to do."
It could have been, I can't imagine what would have happened otherwise.
They would all have left, I'd live with my father. And what he had done to me would still be a secret. Maybe he would have done it again.
Maybe I would have ran away, lived on the streets. Maybe I would have ended it.
"I wonder," I spoke after a few moments of silence, staring at the rocks. "That maybe, I had decided to hate you in that moment, because I needed someone to blame. Someone I wasn't scared to blame like...Matias. Someone I could punish and get some power back from." I pondered, and his green eyes flickered between my own, searching, hoping.
"Maybe I am a hypocrite for pushing you away. But, I also started doing that for a reason."
His expression tightened, listening intently.
"I was attracted to your kindness, and your strength. But deep down I knew from the start why I was really pushed towards you, and when I realised we'd gotten too close it scared me." I took in a deep breath. "You remind me a lot, of someone I used to know. In the end, it's because you care more, and you want to protect me. But the way you held me back, and isolated me from everyone, it reminded me of..." I let out a sharp breath, and stared at the sand.
"...of Finn." He finished the sentence for me and I snapped my head up to look at him. He looked disturbed, almost horrified, but he didn't get angry, just gulped and put his head down.
"I know I try to control too much, I get scared, if things don't go my way. But I didn't mean...to treat you like you were a possession or anything."
"No, I understand, you weren't aiming to be manipulative. But, you stole my passport and forged my signature Luca. You know that's wrong don't you?"
"Yes. I knew it was wrong when I did it. I knew you'd hate me. But I didn't want you to suffer. And I wanted... justice. I didn't want him to get away with it."
I sighed and stared at the waves. I didn't know what to say.
He huffed when I didn't say anything and stared at his lap. His eyes were tired, stressed, and I couldn't even imagine what a smile would look like on him anymore.
He is always so worried, and stressed. I wish he would just take some weight off of his shoulders, just for a little bit. I want to stop his suffering, I want him to feel better.
I couldn't ignore the feeling I had when I looked at him, how I knew I was pleased he was here.
But I couldn't ignore how dangerous this affection could be. And I definitely couldn't ignore the fact he wasn't the only one I felt this way towards.
I let that thought go. I didn't want to contemplate who or how many people I held feelings for. I couldn't. I couldn't face it yet.
"I forgive you, Luca." I said despite myself, and he looked up at me.
He wasn't stupid, he stared for a while, calculating my sincerity, before seemingly concluding I was sincere, enough at least, and sighing with a smile.
"I hope you forgive me completely one day." He said, and I opened my mouth to protest, before just smiling at him.
I looked down when I felt his hand over mine, then let him entwine our fingers. He smiled at me before lifting our hands up and kissing the back of my hand making me blush.
I forced myself to stand up and pull away from him, before walking over to the others.
"Holy fuck..." Was the only thing I could say when Alex turned to face me. He was completely covered in wet sand.
"Hunter did it. They're having a fight." Caleb explained, with a single splat mark on his chest.
"Who with? Alex?"
I jumped when a sand ball came zooming past me then struggled to look for the culprit. Nate was using a rock for cover with a determined expression on his face.
"Umm."
"Take this asshole!" Hunter suddenly appeared from behind a ledge with an old sun-bleached bucket, and threw the contents at Nate.
"Dickhead!" He complained before running and tackling him.
"Fuck you!" Hunter huffed before getting a chunk of sand in his mouth.
"Uh, they're a bit passionate for a sandball fight, aren't they?" I wondered in concern and Alex sighed.
"I don't know, they're fighting about something, these days you lose track."
Hunter hit Nate round the side of the head with the empty bucket and I hissed.
"Uhh, guys, maybe tone it down a little?" I suggested but it fell on deaf ears.
"What's your fucking problem asshole!" Nate shouted before shoving more sand at his face while straddling him.
"Get off of me! You know exactly what my problem is! Or would you like me to tell everyone!"
"Not that idiot, I mean what's your problem mentally you fuckin dimwit!!" He called before getting shoved off.
Hunter crawled ontop of him and was about to slap him before making an odd choking noise when he was tugged upwards by his coat collar.
Luca lifted him off of him and looked between them.
"What the hell are you two doing?"
"He started it!" Nate exclaimed while nursing his sore cheek.
Luca released Hunter from his grip and he sighed angrily before storming passed me.
I frowned before offering Nate my hand.
"You were antagonizing him a lot to be honest." Alex defended as I lifted him up.
"He's threatening me!" Nate huffed and I frowned at him before gasping when I was slapped right in the face with wet sand.
"Hunter! That's very dangerous!" Luca growled as I wiped it off.
"Oops, missed, I guess." He said and I glared at him.
"Right." I growled before reaching down and scooping up a handful of sand.
"Riley, don't you dare!!" Luca warned before I hurled the ball towards Hunter's face. There was a massive thwacking sound as it hit him on the forehead, and I grit my teeth in concern as he fell back on his arse.
"Jesus..." He exclaimed, blinking a little before glaring at me.
"No, stop!" Luca stood in the way as Hunter gathered more sand up and suddenly got pummeled by sand in the back of the head.
I gasped and my jaw dropped before I looked back to see Nate with wide eyes.
"Uh, I, oops. Sorry." He mumbled in fear and I turned around to see Luca glaring at him.
Caleb starting stepping backwards and Alex chuckled awkwardly.
"Luca, seriously, it was an acci- OOF." He doubled over after being hit in the stomach and I blinked in confusion.
I yelped after being hit in the neck moments later, and cringed as I felt it travel down my shirt.
"No, help!" Hunter ran behind a rock in panic as Luca followed him with a sandball in his hand.
Holy shit.
I snickered before gathering up more sand and running after them.
---
Aaron stared at us with a blank expression as we all stood in the entrance way.
"I..." He started, then sighed and went silent.
"What...What happened?" He asked, and Luca pointed at Hunter.
"He started it."
Aaron just blinked, utterly bewildered. He stared at his older brother in a state of shocked confusion.
"I don't understand." He eventually said, with a look of pain on his face.
"Well Luca obviously can't look after us all very well." I threw Luca's earlier comment back at him and Alex sniggered.
"I'll clean it up, don't worry." Luca reassured him before passing him.
I smiled at him as everyone dispersed and went for their rooms.
"Sorry."
I became confused at his reaction when he just went slightly red and avoided eye contact.
"Well, as long as no one is hurt." He said while staring at the wall.
"Are you okay?"
He mumbled something incoherent and then coughed awkwardly before suddenly leaving.
I've never seen someone so confused before, unless there's something else going on?
Okay...
I shrugged it off before climbing the ladder into my room.
Nate was in their cursing to himself and looking angry.
"He's got some nerve." He eventually said as I took my sand covered clothes off and I looked at him in confusion.
"Who?"
"Hunter!" He said, and I rolled my eyes.
"Oh, that."
"He's blackmailing me!" He said and I gave him a sceptical look.
"Threatening to expose your porn stash is he." I teased as I dusted the sand off of my chest and he scoffed.
"I wish!"
I paused and stared at him.
"Then what?"
"What do you think?"
"How would I know."
"Think." He persisted and I took a few moments before turning round and trying to find some tracksuit bottoms.
"Oh."
"Yeah." He huffed dramatically.
"He wouldn't, he's bluffing." I reassured him, trying to act normal.
Wow okay now I feel like I did something real bad.
Where the fuck is my jumper?
This room is too small!!
"Well I'm not apologizing!" He ranted then when silent. "You're avoiding me." He stated after a few moments.
"Am I?" I responded while still searching for my top.
"Do you hate me?"
"What? No."
"You certainly didn't seem like you hated me last night." He carried on and I bit my lip.
"Sush."
"Are we going to pretend it didn't happen?"
"Yes." I said bluntly. "We were wasted."
"Alcohol doesn't make the desire appear it has to be there in the first place."
"Nate can you wait till I've got changed before we talk about this?"
"No because you'll leave."
"You got me." I quickly slipped on my jumper before standing up.
He stood up as well and I tensed. We just stared at eachother in silence and I eventually clicked my tongue.
"K...well, bye." I said before stepping to leave but he suddenly grabbed my jumper and pulled my face towards his.
"O-okay..." I turned away from him slightly as he frowned at me.
"Are you playing games with me?"
"No..."
"Then why are you being so indecisive?"
"Uh, about what?"
"I know you kissed Hunter once." He stated and I made a face.
"Oh. Okay."
"He waved it in my face a few hours ago, are you going out?"
"Umm, nope. This is really awkward could you perhaps-"
"Do you like him?"
"I mean he's alright..."
He opened his mouth to say something then seemingly changed his mind.
"Okay..."
He let my jumper go and I stood back.
"Great...can I go now?" I wondered and then he practically lunged forward making me jump and fall backwards onto the bed.
"You'd kiss me right?" He asked as he pressed me against the bed. "I mean, you don't hate me do you? Am I ugly to you?"
"What? Hey that's a loaded question I can't exactly say no can I?" I complained and he huffed.
"So you don't like me..."
"Bitch, I didn't say that, sure I'm attracted to you but this is a very bad idea." I panicked and he frowned.
"Is anything like this ever a good idea?" He smirked, attitude back and I gave him a look.
"Get off of me hoe."
He smiled before leaning down near my face and I gulped.
"You're not scared of me are you?" He said quietly.
"No..."
"And you like me?"
"...Yes."
"Then..." He leaned down and kissed the side of my neck. "What's the problem..." He muttered before trailing down my neck slightly and I took in a sharp breath.
"Umm..."
He lifted a hand underneath my jumper and trailed it up my stomach, and I closed my eyes as my cheeks burned red.
He licked and bit at my skin making me huff and lose my breath.
He raised his head and stared into my eyes, before tracing his other hand over my cheek.
He then gently nipped at my lip, and I sighed breathlessly before moving my own lips over his and sucking on it.
"Hmm." He smiled against me before running his tongue along my lip and I lifted my head to get closer.
I angled my head slightly before moving my lips in time with his, and letting his tongue into my mouth.
Hot damn...
His hand started moving down, and I gripped the sheets when he slipped it under my breifs.
Unfortunately this made my bag fall off of the bed with a loud thud, and I jumped up in shock making our heads clash.
"Ah, ow." He laughed while holding his head and cringing.
"What are you two doing up there!?" Luca's voice called making my eyes widen and my face go even hotter.
"I just dropped a bag, damn!!" Nate called as he stood up and I let out a breath.
Thin walls...
I tried to defluster myself and pulled my jumper down as he opened the door and then climbed down the ladder without looking at me.
Shit...
Why did I do that.
I took a few moments to catch my breath, and then sighed and climbed down the ladder.
Aaron seemed to be still avoiding me when I entered the kitchen curiously. He just visibly tensed and pretended to be interested in some carrots.
What is wrong with this man this evening?
"Something's bothering you." I stated bluntly, and placed my hand on the counter next to him sternly.
He stayed silent, taking in a breath before looking at me. His gaze flicked between my eyes seriously for a few moments.
"I'm sorry, I don't want to lie or anything. But I don't really want to talk about it..." He sighed.
"But it's effecting the way you react to me and it's making me feel bad." I forced myself to be honest and he cringed.
"Ah, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I'm just frustrated over something, it's not really something that's your fault." He explained, and took another deep breath before smiling. "I'll be fine."
I pursed my lips and narrowed my eyes at him.
"Oops, wrong word, I mean I'll be okay." He chuckled, and I decided to let it go.
"Are you okay?" He changed the subject and I sighed.
"Yes, I guess..."
"You spoke to Luca?"
"Yeah..."
"And?"
"We're okay... kinda"
"Kinda?"
"We're fine."
"Oh, I see. Fine." He smirked and I smiled.
I suspected that, despite the fact he was trying to make me make up with Luca, implying I hadn't really would make him feel better, so I left it at that.
I noticed that he was kind of facing away from me, and moved his hand away from mine on the counter.
He's avoiding being near me...
Do I look diseased or something?
Between a few hours ago and now something's happened.
Maybe he really hates sand.
Yep, that's it.
I smirked to myself before deciding to leave him alone and went into the living room.
Ever since Luca came Aaron's been hiding out in the kitchen. I think there's something going on here, they either hate each other or have a reason they're not getting on at the moment.
Which means Aaron must have been really uncomfortably stressed to have called him.
I kind of feel like the older brothers put too much pressure on him, asking him to take us all to an unknown part of an unknown country and 'look after' us, despite us acting like a bunch of boisterous fools and getting ourselves in danger. I can't imagine how awful he would have felt if something happened to one of us.
He's probably unbelievably tense, and I'm almost certain Luca is not helping his own feelings, but at least we're probably safer and that was surely his reasoning for calling Luca down here in the first place.
"Where are you staying tonight?" I asked Luca as I sat down on the couch, trying not to look at Nate playing on Alex's DS.
It's certainly too late for him to drive all the way back to London. And he shouldn't take country roads in the dark anyway so I hope he's not going to a hotel.
"The couch probably." He smiled.
"You seem happier Luca." Nate commented and I avoided looking up.
"Do I? I'm still just as tired, I haven't slept in a while."
"That's a thing a doctor should get used to tbh." Nate stated and Luca rolled his eyes.
"Right."
"So you two are in the room together then." Luca sighed, and Nate and I shared a look.
"What? At least it's not me and Hunter. Then you'd have a murder case on your hands." Nate huffed and I shook my head at him.
"Are we going out for dinner?" Alex asked as he wondered in. "Hey, get off of my DS!"
"I'm bored though!"
"Not that I know of, ask Aaron." Luca huffed.
"Please Luuuuca I wanna go somewhere you know Aaron never goes anywhere he's so boringggggg." Alex complained and collapsed onto the floor dramatically.
"I heard that! We're eating here today!" Aaron's voice called through the small house.
"Whyyyy would you eat in while on holiday?!"
"I prefer it here." I said and Alex just rolled his eyes at me.
"Says the other boring person!"
"Bitch."
"Sloth!"
"You've either gone back to the Victorian times or made a really strange and irrelevant insult." Luca commented and I sniggered.
"Just because I have class." He puffed and I snorted.
"Right, that's what that is."
"Have you been eating recently?" Luca suddenly asked me and I sighed.
"Yes-" "-No."
I gave Alex a look when he answered over me.
"Yeah I have."
"Not a lot."
"How do you know?"
"Because you never come out with us! And I haven't seen you eating."
"That's because I haven't been around you all the time. I eat."
Luca sighed. "It's probably time for you to take another one of those tablets, and I've also got some sedatives if you want them tonight." He said and Nate scoffed.
"At least he's honest about it." He sniggered to himself.
"About what?" Luca questioned in confusion.
"Sedatives."
"...that's what they are."
"Right, and probably not very herbal either."
"Of course not, they actually work."
"Shots fired at Aaron's whole existence." Nate laughed and I rolled my eyes.
"I'm not really sure I want to be taking some mystery pill... besides, the herbal ones did work fine." I worried, remembering Aaron's complaint about them this morning.
"I can show you the ingredients if you want?" He frowned.
"Um, I don't think that will do much good."
"Not unless he has a degree in chemistry." Alex added with a fake sad nod.
"Fine, you can have just the tablet you took this morning." He gave in but I made another unsure face. "What now?" He gave me a look.
"Does it even do anything..." I wondered.
"Yes, trust me." He said before walking out of the room to get it.
I sighed, staring at the dark window for a few moments as the room descended into awkward silence.
"Are you back in your own rooms tonight?" Alex asked while drumming his fingers along the coffee table. Meanwhile I was trying to listen to the tense voices from the kitchen, and frowned briefly at the interruption.
"Yes, I think I've proven I can handle a ladder now. Plus I'm pretty sure Aaron's a little fed up of me at the moment, if not that I'm sure he doesn't want to sleep on the floor again..."
"He slept on the floor?" Nate questioned with an amused grin, while the background noise in the kitchen got a bit louder. They're arguing again...
"Yeah, why?"
He suddenly gave a drawn out sigh. "Nothing, that's good I guess..." He trailed off, finally looking away from the DS with a frown as the heated discussion in the kitchen got a little loud.
"Give them back you little- ugh!"
"Not a chance!" Aaron's voice was deep with anger, and we all just shared a few looks as we listened in.
"You're naïve if you think anything other than this is going to work!"
"It's unhealthy, and unnatural!"
"The childish doodles on your body are unnatural, this is science and facts."
Yikes.
"No way! You seriously can't have forgotten how Alex was when he was on these." He growled. "And you're stupid if you still think personal insults are going to work on me."
"Mental health isn't all herbs, love and tlc Aaron, it's a physical affliction!"
I flattened my expression in irritation as Alex bit his lip awkwardly.
There was a clanging sound but other than that Aaron didn't verbally reply.
"Ugh god you're so pathetic, grow some balls! And realize your opinion isn't important here! You're not their dammed Mother, it's not your job to make decisions about them!" Luca seemed seriously irritated, his voice unusually tense.
Even Nate seemed uncomfortable now, and I tensed, wondering if I should intervene.
I've seen plenty of brotherly fights before, and I knew they could get very aggressive and heated, so I wasn't surprised about that.
Besides, these two have had a damaged relationship since before I came into the picture, if I understand correctly.
"Well it has certainly seemed that way for at least the passed eleven years, maybe if you'd pitched in a little instead of acting just as needy and childish as they are then we wouldn't need to have this discussion in the first place!"
"You're nearly the same age as them, no one asked you to parent them all the time!"
Wow these guys are really getting everything out in the open right now...
"No one else stepped forward to do it! Maybe if you had then you wouldn't be as inexperienced and bad at trying to help Riley!"
Welp my name has been brought into it. Great.
"I think we should just let them... work it out." Nate said when I opened my mouth to ask if I should stop them.
"Stop trying to act all mature and responsible, when you're even more vulnerable and weak than any of them are!"
Ouch...
How has this argument not gotten physical yet... I guess they're both 'supposedly' pacifist... but, at this rate..
"Again with the personal insults, I get enough of them as it is. Stop deviating from the subject of this childish argument in the first place!"
"You are the one blocking me from my own possessions like a five year old!"
"You're the one that has consistently overstepped his boundaries when it comes to a certain someone's privacy and personal space. So you really can't say anything about my behaviour!"
"Oh look at you, the very embodiment of self control! And how's that working out for you, huh? Feeling a bit frustrated?"
I don't like where this conversation is going, the blood is rushing to their heads a little too much I think...
"You haven't half got some damn nerve!- stop, stop drying my patience, I have limits, and they're very pushed right now!" Aaron warned him, his voice sounding threatened and almost a little shaky.
"You're both idiots if you think we can't hear you!" I shouted over Luca's reply when I couldn't take it anymore, and a silence fell so heavily that it made my ears ring.
That is, until the death tone of Mario on the DS chimed, and Alex let out a little snigger.
Nate made an awkward face before sitting on the thing and biting his lip.
"Sorry." Luca's voice sighed and the silence lasted a few more moments.
I stood up, planning on getting them to go their separate ways somehow.
I don't know what silent antagonizing they must have been doing in there, but not a moment later tensions snapped and there was a loud crash.
We all rushed into the kitchen, finding Luca and a few pans he'd been knocked into on the floor.
Ohhh shiiitt, unexpected outcome.
"Guys what the actual fuck is wrong with you!" Nate called as Hunter came stomping down the stairs and Caleb tentatively joined the scene as well.
Aaron was red faced, fixating on Luca angrily, and I stood in front of him as I got the feeling this wasn't over.
"Calm down." I ordered and he spared me a small glance and turned upset.
"Careful, Riley." Luca commented as he stood up, making Aaron immediately glare at him again and step forward.
"Now come on guys, you know this isn't worth it." I reasoned as they glowered at eachother.
Aaron was shaking, he'd obviously been pushed to his absolute limit.
With everything stressing both of them out, and then Aaron's pressure of looking after us, it's maybe not that surprising that things reached breaking point.
Nate and I both shared a bewildered look as we worked out how to diffuse the situation.
I gulped, thinking of all the possible ways I contributed to this stress on both of them.
And Nate and Hunter fighting earlier, was that my fault as well?
They seemed to be antagonizing eachother with looks and expressions again, and Luca glared at him sharply when he retreated behind me slightly.
"Give me the tablets Aaron." He growled, and Aaron gave a sharp huff before bringing the packet out of his pocket.
He gave Luca a passionate glare before suddenly ripping the packet in half and throwing them in the open bin.
Oh, shit!
"You fu-!" Luca lunged for him, but I refused to let this stupid fight carry on and pushed them apart.
I seemed to have underestimated how much of a blind rage he was in however, as the next moment I was whimpering after a strong blow to the gut.
I folded over for a few moments, my breath clean knocked out of me, before gasping.
I stared at Luca in shock as I stood up properly, and he still seemed to be processing what had happened.
"Right!" I lunged for him and returned the favour by kicking him right in the stomach. He didn't really react, and crashed into the pan rack yet again making loud clanging noises.
I sucked in a breath in confusion when something was stopping me from moving forward. It took me a few moments, but I realised Aaron's arms were gripping round my waist tightly as he held me back against him.
His chest was moving rapidly against my back, his breathing irregular, and I began to feel light headed as I thought about what I just did.
I'm just as bad as they are, I think this house is cursed.
The other brothers seemed to be experienced enough to stand back, and were standing in an almost organised line observing the events.
"I really wish Chance was here..." Caleb whispered, looking really uncomfortable.
He's got a point, there is no one with authority or strength enough to slap sense into these two around.
"I'm sorry, I'm fine." I said while trying to push away from Aaron, then stood, slightly more cautiously this time, in-between them.
"You two obviously have too much on your shoulders right now." I stated, daring to try and control the situation.
"You need a break Aaron, and Luca, you really need some sleep. How about we all sort ourselves out this evening, I promise we can do it. And you two just go calm down. I'm sure Caleb and Alex don't mind you using their room Luca." I said and looked between them determinedly.
"Are you okay?" Aaron asked me quietly, and I nodded.
"I can sort myself out, just go." I ordered and he stared at me for a second before just sighing and turning to go up the stairs obediently.
I looked at Luca, who was staring at the floor with guilt covering his features.
"I am so sorry Riley, I didn't mean to hurt you."
"Yeah well it's nothing new." I commented and he physically recoiled before turning and leaving the room.
"Holy shit." Nate eventually said after a minute of silence.
"That was epic." Alex commented.
"That was the first time Aaron's hit someone like that, I wish I saw it." Hunter sighed and I gave them all a look.
"Seemed like self defense to me." Nate pondered. "I think Luca went for him, damn, I can't believe we missed it."
"Welcome to our family Riley, fights like these used to happen all the time, Luca and Aaron have never been the perpetrators though, and over a difference in opinion? Too weird, super dodgy." Alex explained in amusement, and I sighed, my abdomen aching dully.
"I can't believe Luca hit you." Caleb scowled, obviously very upset.
"It was an accident." I excused, wincing and lifting my top to see a giant red mark.
"He's super unstable..."
"We're all unstable, this place is too small."
"Don't ignore what that was about, not even a mansion could stop that fight that was brewing." Hunter commented, staring at me coldly.
"What?"
"Don't be a fool, you know what I'm talking about."
"Let's not get into that." Alex coughed awkwardly before bouncing over to the counters. "I say ice-cream sandwiches for dinner!"
"Gross, I'm making pasta." Caleb tried to add to the distraction and approached the counter a little more calmly.
I glared at the floor, trying to release all my frustrations on it, before pushing passed them and sitting in the living room.
I rubbed at my forming bruise with my hand while staring at the carpet.
Fucking damnit.
I can't keep track of people, humans are too unpredictable. I mean, I've spent most of my life alone, and then I'm expected to know what to do when I'm thrown into a world of squabbling brothers and, well, horny idiots.
This is only going to get worse, and I don't want to anger any of them further.
"How hard did he hit you?" Nate suddenly asked as he sat next to me.
"Uh, I'm fine, it wasn't that powerful..."
"Luca and Aaron are usually the only ones able to break up the fights, so I'm actually surprised it's ended already to be honest. They were really angry..."
I sighed and bit my lip.
"I think they both hate each other for liking you." He commented and I made a face.
"Can we not mention that."
"It's taboo is it?" He smirked and I gave him a look. "Well I can't blame them, shame there isn't more of you to go around." He teased and I scowled at him.
"You really can't read the room." I sighed and he smiled mischievously.
"What do we do now?" Alex sighed as he walked in with Hunter.
Hunter gave Nate a sharp glare before settling on the armchair and browsing his phone.
"I don't know..." I sighed and Alex made a face before walking over to the shelves.
"Hey, look at this." He brought out a dusty stack of Uno cards.
"Are you serious..." Nate gave him a look.
"Do you have any other suggestions?" He pulled his tongue out at him before sitting on the floor.
"You in?" Alex looked at me hopefully and I sighed before smiling.
"Fine. I'll endure it." I teased and he smiled happily.
"Ugh, fine." Nate huffed before sitting on the floor next to him.
"Um, I'm not that familiar with this game." I excused as I sat down as well.
"It's fine, I'll go over the rules again."
"Well, okay then."
-
Luca eventually surfaced just after 11 pm, probably because he had to give Alex and Caleb their room back.
Aaron however didn't come out at all.
Caleb had made pasta and pesto for dinner which was super cute, and really reminded me of back when I used be looked after by my nannies.
Alex eventually got his way and made ice-cream sandwiches, and I had to convince him I didn't want any at least six times.
The Uno game, well, the ten Uno games we played were relatively peaceful, apart from the occasional spiteful comments Hunter and Nate shared.
Hunter stayed sitting on the armchair while Luca set up his bed, probably avoiding seeing Aaron.
Luca didn't really look at me, well, at least not when I was looking, but I did notice a few glances out of the corner of my eyes sometimes.
I sighed as I tapped my fingers on the carpet, I was still sitting on the floor, probably stalling from going to bed.
"Are you two going to go to bed any time soon?" Luca asked, while folding a sheet and purposefully not looking up.
"Ugh, but it's going to be so awkward." Hunter sighed, looking away from his phone.
"I'm sure it'll be fine, he's probably asleep." I reassured.
"That or doing something else." Luca smirked to himself and quirked an eyebrow.
Hunter frowned and opened his mouth, then closed it again, and narrowed his eyes.
"Uh, maybe you two should have a controlled discussion in the morning, you know, straighten things out." He suggested and Luca sighed.
"I think we got our issues with eachother across pretty straightforwardly, well, not exactly straight, per say." He remarked and I frowned at his weird mood.
"Okaaayyy, well, I'm going to bed." Hunter stood up and walked out of the room.
"Why are you still here?" Luca asked after a few seconds and I made a face while standing up.
"Well excuse me, damn." I commented and he looked at me.
"No I didn't mean it like that. I mean, are you afraid of going to bed?"
"Well, night isn't exactly the most pleasant experience for me."
"Are you sure you don't want those sleeping pills? I know you struggle taking them, but they'll help."
"No it's okay, I don't want to add fuel to the fire anyway."
Luca stopped what he was doing and stood in silence.
"Are you okay? Can I see your bruise?" He asked, and I tensed.
"No, I'm fine. Don't worry about it. I understand it was an accident." I reassured him. "And I'm sorry for kicking you."
"Well, I deserved it..."
"Now we're even, so don't worry."
I really didn't want him getting stressed about his relationship with me all over again, so I tried my best to prove I wasn't angry with him.
I definitely didn't want to get hit again by him though, that man seriously packs a punch.
"I'm sorry I got you involved in our fight..."
"I don't know why you two hate eachother so much..." I commented, then immediately regretted it as he gave me a look.
"You sure about that?" He said and I chuckled awkwardly.
"Apart from that."
"Well, he resents me a little bit for not supporting him and the others. And I hate that he couldn't see that I had bigger aspirations than looking after my little brothers. I mean, it's hard enough to get into medical school as it is, without the stress of family to add to it."
"So you studied while he looked after everyone?"
"Yes, I guess. And so did Chance and Chester. Us older ones had bigger ambitions. It's a shame, that Aaron got caught in the middle. Zac too, but he refused to take on the responsibility of looking after his brothers. In fact, he caused a lot of the problems sometimes." He sighed.
"Why was there no other help?"
"Our father, well, isn't a father. And hired help couldn't really cope with 4 boisterous rich brats and their teenage older brothers."
"Aaron likes children though."
"I guess, I feel like his dreams would have been bigger if he didn't look after them though, maybe he would have gotten into a better college."
"You don't seem to hate him in the way you talk."
"Well, I wouldn't say that to his face." He smirked. "But no, I wouldn't hold that kind of grudge against family."
He frowned. "Aaron and I used to get on really well, actually."
"I know, he told me." I smiled. "He said you pushed him away though."
"I recall it the other way around." He stated, and I sighed.
"Hmm."
"You should try go to bed, Riley." He said before settling on the couch and I took the hint.
"Right, goodnight."
--
"Do you think dead family members look down at you from like heaven or something?" Nate's voice made me open my eyes and I blinked.
"That's a really strange thing to suddenly say to someone at like 1 AM." I stated, and he chuckled.
"I could tell you were awake though."
"Why are you awake?" I asked, sitting up and looking at him in the darkness.
"Can't sleep." He sighed. "Well?"
"Um, I don't tend to ponder that as I don't know many dead relatives ."
"You had grandparents and cousin's right?"
"Died before I was born, and my father's relatives live in Poland I guess."
"What? Your dad is polish?"
"No, his father was polish, he never talked about it. But I got the idea that even if we had relatives they weren't anywhere near us."
"Oh."
There was silence for a bit.
"I don't believe in heaven, so I don't think there's anyone watching us, that's a bit creepy." I eventually answered the question.
"Right?" He chuckled. "I just always used to worry about that when I was younger, I felt like they were disappointed in me for doing bad things. Well, at least I felt like they were bad at the time."
"Bad things?"
"Oh you know, wanking to gay porn and that." He commented casually and I choked on my own breath.
"Oh, right." I laughed and shook my head at him, before putting my hand on my mouth. "I really hope these walls aren't as thin as I worry they are..."
"Hm, me too." He sniggered as he shuffled a bit on his bed.
"You don't feel like that's a bad thing now?" I asked with a brow raised in amusement.
"Of course not, sexuality is just a part of life."
"And you don't think your dead granny is watching you anymore?"
"Well it's too late now even if they are. Guess I'll have to cross that bridge when I come to it." He chuckled.
"Right."
"Speaking of bad things. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier. I didn't think you were shy or anything from what we've talked about before." He said and I frowned.
"No I'm not... uncomfortable. What do you mean before?"
"You know, when you were talking about cheating on your ex." He said too casually and I cringed.
Ah, that. I really shouldn't have told him that, it probably gave the wrong impression. Especially because his ex cheated on him. In fact, I'm surprised he doesn't hate me...
"Right... sorry about that."
"Sorry? Why?"
"Well it's probably a sore subject."
"No, it's fine with me. Sometimes it's like that." He said seeming a little distracted.
I was trying my best to try and convince myself he wasn't doing what I thought he was doing, but it was pretty hard to ignore.
"Nathan!" I whisper-shouted and threw a pillow at him, and he chuckled.
"What? Got a problem?"
"That's like, public indecency." I complained, my cheeks going red.
"Public? It's technically my room." He excused and I gave him a look he probably couldn't even see in the dark.
"You're gross."
"And you're gross for calling me Nathan."
"Wow yeah those two things are really on par with eachother." I huffed. "Stop it!" I threw another object.
"You don't really want me to stop." He muttered and I shook my head and closed my eyes.
"Don't I? How do you know that?"
"Because. Do you want to have sex?" He asked bluntly and I started laughing.
"There's something real strange about you."
"Just say no if you really don't want to. But, I am pretty sure you'd be up for it."
"Huh, should I be offended?"
"Are you?"
"Not really... I'm used to people talking like that."
"Oh..."
"I don't want to make things complicated." I stated.
"How would you? Like you said, sex doesn't mean anything to you."
"But I recall you implying it meant something to you?"
"In a relationship maybe. But you're not in one right? I'm pretty sure things would be different if one of my brother's had reached that point." He commented and I snickered.
"Right, maybe it would be."
"You had sex with Chester at least once, and things didn't get complicated with him." He said making my eyes widen.
"How do you kn- why do you think that?" I asked, clearing my throat awkwardly.
"I'm observant."
"Well, I guess we just silently agreed nothing would come of it." At least, I like to think that, otherwise that's another future issue added to the list.
"Okay, so can we non-silently agree that nothing will come of it?" He asked, sitting up on the bed.
"Uh...." I paused, swallowing hard. "Okay..?"
"So that's a yes?" The pitch of his voice heightened.
"...Yes...?"
How the fuck is this situation happening. How do you just ask someone that. Why am I agreeing??
"Oh, fuck, okay." He stood up and reached into his bag.
"You seem surprised, but you asked like you were sure."
"Well, confidence is like, 80% faking it until you make it." He smirked as he stood up with a few items in his hand. "Are you going to move from that spot or?"
"Why do I have to move?"
"Because the roof above your bed is super low and slanted, duh."
"And it's just gonna stay this dark?"
"Actually, I do want to see one thing." He said, turning the bedside lamp on and I tensed. "Dude, get up." He prompted and I stood.
He hissed as he looked at my stomach and I sighed. "Yeah it's a bit black isn't it."
"You saying black is bad?" He teased.
"Very funny."
"Sit for a second." He demanded and I gave him a look before sitting on his bed. He practically glared down at the bruise and I hissed when he touched it.
"He seriously got you man. That's like, an art piece or something." He chuckled and I narrowed my eyes.
"Jee, thanks for your sympathy."
"Has Luca seen that? He'd like, self combust."
"No, he doesn't need to know. It's just a bruise anyway."
"Whatever you say...hey, you've done it with Luca as well haven't you?" He smirked and I glared at him.
"That's private."
"Oh right, sorry, because privacy is really an essential part of our relationship at this moment in time." He chuckled.
"Good point I guess..."
He then turned off the light, making me blink as my eyes adjusted.
"What are you doing?" I asked quietly, gulping when he moved in closer.
He brushed our lips together before kissing me rather tentatively, and I gripped the bed sheets with my fingers.
"Wait, these walls are too thin.." I worried as he moved his hands down my waist.
"Don't worry, I'll make sure you don't get too loud." He smirked and I scoffed.
Excuse me??
"Still talking bigger than your mouth huh?" I teased and gasped when he just put his hands straight down into my briefs.
"Stop stalling, unless you really are shy?" He whispered while gripping me kind of aggressively. I didn't say anything, just had my mouth open like an idiot with burning cheeks.
He leaned his head down and trailed his lips down my neck as he pulled my briefs down more.
I closed my eyes and bit my lip when I realised I was making little noises and sighs.
"Fuck, did you want to have sex or bloody mutual masterbation or something?" I complained as he continued to just mess around and he snorted.
"Well, didn't want to go too fast for you."
"Is degradation your kink or something?" I commented sarcastically and he chuckled.
"Hmm, maybe, I'm definitely not turned off at the moment anyway." He teased as he fiddled with a lube bottle.
I guess it's a tiny bit late to wonder if a causal hook up like this would make our relationship awkward.
"I'm going to regret asking this but you were on the bottom right when having sex with them?" He asked and I gave him an incredulous look.
"Why would you ask that??"
"I wanted to know if you had used lube before." He smirked and I scowled.
"Plenty times more than you, bra-shit! Dude, calm down." I complained when he practically shoved his whole hand up there and he sniggered.
"You're too cute, lie back." He pushed my torso down onto the bed while he remained standing.
I was too busy wincing and huffing to complain about the weird position.
He really doesn't mess around, fucking hell.
"Are you ready?" He asked while grabbing a condom and I scoffed.
"My brain hasn't even caught up with me yet hang the fuck on."
"Do you usually get this fiesty?" He leaned down over me and I rolled my eyes.
I moved my head to the side and closed my eyes with a sigh when he began sucking and kissing my neck again.
He trailed his hand up my chest and leaned over me more, making me aware of his erection pressing against my lower abdomen.
"Shit..." I sighed to myself, trying to stop myself overthinking about this bad idea too much.
"Isn't it supposed to be you that's the one that want's to hurry the fuck up?" Nate questioned after at least a few minutes of stalling foreplay and I smirked.
"Why the rush? Are you anxious?" I teased and he huffed with a crooked smile.
"You do intimidate me a little." He commented as he stood up straight.
"Are you serious? Why?"
"Can I tell you after?" He said while opening the packet and I gave him a look.
"Meaning it's something that will offend me."
"...Yeah probably."
I huffed before tilting my head back and staring at the cieling.
This doesn't mean anything, it's just having fun. It won't have any complications afterwards. Nope.
"Hey, I don't want to take you by surprise." Nate said to get my attention and I looked back to him.
"Ow, you're not lifting my legs like that I'm not a fucking gymnast." I complained and he burst out laughing for a second before stopping himself and giving me an oh shit expression.
"Don't make me laugh. And it'll be easier for me if I do." He said after a few moments of silence waiting to see if we'd woken anyone.
"I don't give a fuck, you're not the one that has to be in pain."
He lowered my legs to his waist while giving me a flat look.
I'm being so bad right now, I feel guilty already. I can't believe I'm letting this happen.
I sighed anxiously as he adjusted himself.
"It'll be fine, we're not doing anything illegal at least." He seemed to catch onto my mood.
"Isn't the bed a bit low for you to just stand like that?"
"You'll appreciate the downward angle." He smirked.
Oh fucking really, how the hell do you know.
He hesitated for a small, unsure moment before suddenly pushing in and I sucked in through my teeth.
He moved out then in again, making an almost pained face and sighing.
I leaned my head back against the bed and huffed.
I bit my lip to stop the stupid noises I was making when he started going harder, torn between asking him to slow down and wanting the feeling to stay.
The pain subsided within a minute, and I began to desire more intensity.
"Ah,-shit..." I sighed and placed my arm over my eyes, feeling almost dizzy.
Nate was huffing almost as much as I was, and his anxiety was showing through his unsure and unsteady movements.
I thought about reassuring him, but speech was an ability just beyond my grasp at the moment.
Probably a good thing, because we really needed to just shut the fuck up.
He gripped my thighs almost painfully hard before adjusting his pace, and I grit my teeth in frustration.
Just keep quiet you idiot. If you get caught you mindswell just go into the sea and never come back.
Fuck, I can't even imagine.
I listened to my own breathing for a while, desperate to not show any signs of what I was feeling on the outside.
"Fuck..." He rasped pausing for a second before changing his angle again. "You're really..."
"Don't you fucking say it." I warned despite my lack of breath.
"But you are..." He chuckled breathlessly and I closed my eyes tighter and gripped my hair.
"You're an idiot." I huffed and he made an amused sighing noise.
"Now who has the degradation kink." He quipped, seemingly trying to thrust harder, but he lost balance and pulled completely out as he practically fell ontop of me.
"Ow!" I complained when his hand stomped down onto my stomach as he tried to steady himself and he cursed.
"Sorry." He apologised quietly and I chuckled.
"Quick tip, don't make yourself pull out completely, it's not a good feeling."
He huffed. "It was an accident."
"I could tell."
He muttered something before readjusting, his coordination wasn't the best but I eventually sighed as he pushed back in.
He lifted my waist up a little more and pushed further with his hips.
"Fuck." I gripped the sheets and bit down on my lip, feeling the hot tingling sensation travel up my abdomen.
He gave out a strained sigh, obviously trying to keep the same angle as he pulled out and thrust in again.
I tilted my head back and breathed through my mouth, really trying not to look like I was having too much of a good feeling.
"Hmm." He seemed to give some kind of amused noise before picking up the pace and I closed my eyes tighter and gripped the sheets.
I felt embarrassed as I listened to the obvious noises of the room, my anxiety about the smallness of this house stopping me from letting go.
"Nate.." I warned when I felt like I couldn't stop the noises I was making and arched my back.
"Shit, don't do that." He moved unsteadily and I accidentally started laughing breathlessly.
He made a wide eyed expression and gripped my side.
"Don't move like that either." He visibly grit his teeth and took in a deep breath.
What, laughing?
Oh...
I smiled at him and he sighed.
"Damn..." He closed his eyes and started moving again, seemingly not in the mood to stop and chat.
He was obviously having trouble getting comfortable, which was amusing actually, as he adjusted himself yet again before settling in a rhythm.
I felt a flush of heat and pleasure travel through my body, and lightly sighed.
This feeling people crave, maybe if it wasn't so sought after and addictive my life would be much different.
My breathing got heavier as the feeling pulsed and became stronger, making my muscles tense.
"Hh, fuck." I became frustrated at the amount of fucking noise I was making, but I couldn't control it for a few moments and reached my hand down to try and stop myself making a mess.
Shit I should have worn a condom as well.
I accidentally arched my back again, wincing and huffing. Nate made a groan of complaint before stopping and gasping.
I exhaled as all tension left, and we panted in silence for a good minute and a half.
"Shit." The silence was broken by Nate's laugh. "That almost hurt it felt so strong."
"I need a tissue." I stated and he snorted before getting up off of me.
"I forgot about that." He commented casually and I sighed and gulped as I adjusted to the different feelings I was now experiencing.
He dumped a whole pack of tissues on my chest making me jump.
"Thanks, bitch."
"Rude, after I had so generously shared my intimate talents with you."
"I hope you're making fun of yourself there." I smirked as I cleaned myself up then sat up.
"Hm, maybe a little." He smiled and then huffed, sitting down next to me.
"A bit tired are we?" I asked and he just nodded.
"Okay." I said as I stood up, and he gripped my wrist.
"No wait, I like this part too." He said as he lazily lay back on his bed and tried to drag me with him.
"I thought this didn't mean anything." I said in concern.
"Oh shut up, this doesn't have to mean anything either, we're all just pleasure seeking after all." He said and I frowned in confusion before just leaning down to get my briefs and put them back on.
"Come onn." He huffed and complained, reaching out and grabbing my arm again with his eyes closed and pulling me over to him.
I sighed before giving in and laying next to him. I stared at his face for a while until he opened his eyes and looked back.
"I wish I had blue eyes." He commented with a sigh.
"Why?"
"It's just... prettier."
"I think you automatically think eye colours other than your own are attractive, I like brown eyes." I smiled and he smirked.
"Sure." He said, before moving his hand up and brushing his fingers down my arm.
I stayed silent, staring at him as he looked down at where his hand was trailing.
He started moving his fingers in a circle on my waist, and I flinched when it began to feel ticklish.
He chuckled when he realised why I was reacting like that and brought his hand to his side.
He smiled at me before leaning forwards and brushing against my lips. I lifted my hand to bring his face closer then gave him a strong and long kiss.
He blinked at me when I let go. "Is that you saying you want to go for round two?" He asked and I snorted.
"No, fuck off." I said before turning around, and he laughed quietly.
There was a few moments of still, before he moved forwards and put his arms round my waist, and his head rested against my back.
I closed my eyes and tried not to worry about the future, just appreciated the company.
---
👀
Hands up who thinks there's no such thing as no consequences in this situation, oof
What do we think about Luca and Aaron's fight?
Crap this chapter is 10,000 words lmao