Draco stared glassy-eyed at the taps in the shower as he tried to muster up energy to turn them on. He was so tired. He had never in his life been as tired as he was right now. Night and day he worked on his project. He barely ate and he sure as hell didn't sleep. His mind started to blur his day together and he didn't stop working until he was so tired that the world no longer made sense. He felt like he was drunk without the added benefit of being relaxed.
He wanted to go to sleep, but at the same time he wanted to shower. It had been almost a week. His skin and hair were so oily that his eyes burned from it. He didn't know how Snape could stand this feeling day in and day out. He felt nauseated being this dirty. It made it so he couldn't even sleep well because he ended up obsessing over how gross he was.
He was just about to give up on his notion of being cleansed when the taps turned on. The shock of the water woke Draco out of his zombie-like state and he looked around the shower to see who it was that had aided him.
"Hello, Myrtle," Draco smiled after a few moments.
The young ghost sheepishly emerged from the ceiling above him. Draco offered her a small smile through the cascading water them before he started washing the days away. He was aware that Myrtle was watching him. While before he may have been offended or disgusted, now he no longer cared.
Myrtle was odd and annoying, but she was also sad. She was the youngest ghost in Hogwarts. Not only had she died much too young, but she had died here in a place where the others like her were mature and from centuries before her. She had no one to relate to, no one that she could talk to day in and day out. She was at a standstill watching children her age socialize, learn, experience all life had to offer and then leave. It had to be lonely. And now that Draco realized he may share the same fate, that Graces may share it he couldn't find it in himself to be anything but friendly towards her. It's what he would want if it was Graces.
"You're not going to tell me to leave?" Myrtle asked hesitantly.
"Would you have actually left?" Draco asked skeptically, taking some soap and lathering it across his chest and neck. He let Myrtle's silence answer the question. "Exactly. I figured I would just save myself the breath."
There was a long silence and Draco wondered if Myrtle had maybe left. He took advantage of the quiet though to wash his hair. The water hadn't been adjusted to be warm, but he didn't care. The cold water seemed to be the only thing keeping him up and he didn't want to waste any energy on adjusting it to be comfortable.
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
No," Draco laughed tiredly. "No girlfriend. I don't exactly have the time these days to be courting anyone." Draco peeked up at the ghost for a brief second before smiling at his toes. Myrtle seemed quite pleased with his answer. "What about you, Myrtle? Any men in your afterlife?"
"Don't tease me."
"I'm not teasing. I'm bantering," Draco corrected, turning around to get his back.
"Bantering," Myrtle repeated confused.
"Flirting," Draco clarified, looking up and winking. Draco had to hold his breath from laughing at Myrtle's expression. He had no idea ghosts could blush.
"You're not flirting with me," Myrtle grumbled, apparently seeing his smile.
"Myrtle, I am naked in the shower and talking to you," Draco pointed out patiently as he turned the taps off. "At this point everything I say to you that isn't telling you to get out is flirting."
"Why would you flirt with me?" Myrtle asked coyly, moving with Draco as he left the stall.
"I'm a bit of a tease," Draco admitted, taking a towel and covering his bottom half. "I like attention."
"A tease?"
"I like to tantalize girls."
"Oh," Myrtle breathed deflated.
"Only girls worth tantalizing," Draco added, not wanting to make Myrtle feel bad. It seemed to work, judging by the way Myrtle swirled down from the ceiling and sat on a bench while Draco finished drying off.
"You look tired," Myrtle commented, her translucent eyes staring at Draco's quicksilver.
"Tired doesn't even begin to describe it."
"Tomorrow's Saturday," Myrtle offered, indicating that he could sleep in.
"Today is Saturday," Draco yawned, now more tired as he realized it was almost four in the morning. "I have a lot to do. I can't sleep in. A few hours and I should be good."
"That's not healthy, sleep is for the living. You need it."
"If I don't do what needs to be done I won't be living," Draco whispered, grabbing his trousers and beginning to dress.
"Well, if that happens you could share my toilet with me."
"You don't think it's a bit too soon?" Draco grinned. "I mean moving in is a big step."
"You're teasing me again," Myrtle murmured, trying hard not to smile at Draco's humor.
"I am," Draco smiled.
"I don't mind when you tease me," Myrtle admitted coyly after a few moments of thinking. "You're not malicious."
"You don't know me," Draco chuckled.
"I know you well enough."
Draco decided not to correct Myrtle. He knew he could be an ass, but he decided not to be one tonight. Myrtle, though dead, still seemed to have a tremendous amount of feelings and these days he understood exactly what loneliness was like.
"Good night, Myrtle. I enjoyed our little chat."
"I enjoyed the show."
Draco looked back for a moment and raised an eyebrow at Myrtle's smug comment, before laughing himself and leaving. By the time he reached his dorm room he was ready to just lay in the doorway and sleep. He dragged his tired feet across the floor and flopped down on his bed. Only, to his surprise, he had flopped down on something hard. He sat up and realized someone was under his sheets already sleeping soundly.
Graces, he thought tiredly, knowing she was the only person that wouldn't wake if something heavy came crashing down on her legs. He lifted the sheets and realized she had disillusioned herself so she wouldn't be seen. Probably so she wouldn't be seen by Nott, Draco concluded bitterly. He looked over to Nott's bed and felt a shiver go through him when he realized the other boy wasn't there. Draco wondered what it was Nott was doing for their Lord and how close he was becoming to him.
He quietly made his sister visible and closed the curtains around his bed snuggling close to her. He wished she did this more often and yet he knew he couldn't ask her to. He didn't want her in this room with Nott around and he didn't want her to know how little he slept. If she came to sleep with him more she would know he didn't really sleep and the last thing he needed was Graces fussing over him.
No sooner had Draco closed his eyes was his alarm going off for him to return to his task. Two hours. He had only received two hours of sleep, it felt like two seconds. He reached over to silence the blasted golden clock, when Graces beat him to it. The blonde reached out a lazy hand and firmly held the clock until it was silenced, not even bothering to open her eyes.
"Go back to sleep, Draco," Graces murmured groggily from his pillow, her hair puffing out as from her face as she spoke.
"No, it's fine," Draco whispered. "I need to—"
"You need to sleep," Graces interrupted, throwing a leg over him to pin him down. "I know you only got back a few hours ago. As if I didn't notice you belly flopping on my legs. Honestly, Draco."
Draco flushed and started to remind his sister what was at stake should he not finish on time, but Graces just groaned and put her hand on his mouth silencing him.
"No more talking," Graces yawned. "Don't worry about the task. I have everything taken care of."
"You have everything taken care of," Draco repeated in disbelief.
"I do," Graces yawned again, already seeming to be falling back to sleep.
"Do you care to explain?"
"I have a back up plan."
Draco, losing his patience with his very vague sister, jostled the blonde awake impatiently. Graces groaned and wrinkled her nose at him, but after a second good shove opened her eyes.
"You're so mean."
"And you're so annoying."
"See, you get crabby when you don't sleep enough," Graces pouted.
"Graces," Draco hissed. "Stop being a child and explain."
Graces stared at him for a few moments and Draco held his breath as her eyes turned more somber. She slowly sat up from the bed and told Draco to put a silencing charm around them. Draco frowned, but did as instructed.
"I have a safe house for us," Graces whispered, looking around the curtains as though she were scared to say all this out loud. "If you fail we are going to go. You, me, mum, Thomas, Octavian and Alethea. We are all going to go."
Draco tensed at his sister's words and just stared at her. She looked so sure. So insanely sure that this was a good plan that this would work.
"A safe house," Draco echoed skeptically.
"Yes," Graces nodded tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "A safe house. Untraceable to any of us. No one would know we were there. There is no trail."
"How?"
Graces bit her lip hesitantly before muttering that it was best he didn't know.
"I'm just supposed to trust that this plan is sound?" Draco asked in disbelief. "Without any idea of what you have planned?"
"Isn't that what you've asked from me?" Graces glowered. "I have no idea what you are doing and you won't tell me a thing or allow me to help. I've taken your word, Draco. You need to take mine. This is sound. We will be safe. We could be safe tonight!" Graces continued, an edge of desperation coming to her voice. "We could all leave tonight and be safe for this whole war."
"What about—"
"I know. I know what about father," Graces cut in. "It's the only reason I haven't asked to go now."
She had a point. Draco pursed his lips and tried hard not to tell Graces that what he asked was different than what she was asking now.
"You will live, Draco," Graces whispered, her hands coming into his and gripping them tight. "We will be together. Never apart. This plan will save the both of us."
"How though?" Draco whispered tightly, unable to believe without proof. "How did you acquire this house?"
"It doesn't matter," Graces pleaded. "I have it."
"It does matter," Draco argued, taking his hands away. "Graces, it does matter. How did you get a house?"
Graces looked away from him and Draco for a brief moment felt as though there was something sinister afoot before she looked back at him despondently and answered.
"I told you I was saving. Putting money away from tutoring so we would have an escape plan."
"So you bought it?" Draco clarified.
"It's not under my name," Graces informed quickly. "I swear on my life, Draco, it's not traceable to us."
Draco opened his mouth to argue, but stopped as Graces hands went to his shoulder.
"I love you more than anything in this world," she rasped, tears coming to her eyes. "I would die for you. And I love mum, Thomas and Octavian as well. Do you think I would risk any of your lives? This is a fool proof plan, Draco. I swear."
Draco closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. She was asking him to trust her the same way she had trusted him. Without question. With complete faith. For some reason it was more difficult than he imagined it would be. He tried to remember a time when faith was easy and trust was natural. Another slow boil of anger came to him about his father. His whole life his faith had been wrapped up in an untrue god and now he was shaken to the core.
"Draco?"
"I trust you," he lied, not wanting to hurt his sister with his doubt. This was more now than just about her feeling safe, it had turned into a test of sorts of his confidence in her. "I'm just tired."
"Then lay down," Graces urged, slowly pulling him down onto the pillow with her.
Draco nodded and laid looking up at the ceiling.
"Why did you come here last night?" he asked after the quiet began to feel unsettling.
"I had a bad dream," Graces murmured, her breath tickling the hair near his ears. "I came here hoping to see you, but you weren't here."
"I'm sorry," Draco offered lamely. "What did you dream?"
"Don't worry about it. It was just a dream," Graces whispered, turning over and facing the other way. "Let's just go back to bed."
"No, I won't be able to sleep unless you tell me."
"Draco, it's just a silly dream and I don't want to relive it," Graces rasped, pulling the covers up over her shoulders to close herself off. Draco felt his heart sink at how small Graces sounded and moved closer to her, awkwardly wrapping his arms around her from behind and resting his head near hers.
"I have bad dreams too," he admitted quietly, in a way thankful that he couldn't see Graces' face. "I dream about... about that night. The night when the muggle healer was here... I dream about when your heart stopped."
Draco wondered if Graces was holding her breath she became so still. After a moment she turned around so she was facing him, her face haunted by the memory of her death that she didn't have.
"I'm fine, Draco," she promised, her hand moving to his cheek. "It was all alright."
"You weren't there," Draco choked, turning his chin down. "You didn't see the worst of it. You didn't see the muggle's eyes when your heart stopped... when you stopped breathing. He didn't think he was going to be able to bring you back. He didn't say that, but I could tell by the look on his face and the way he kept talking to you, urging you to come back, urging you to fight."
"I'm sorry you had to see that," Graces whispered, her silver eyes searching out his. "I never wanted you to experience anything like that."
Draco gritted his teeth. Nothing could be done about it now. He had seen it and he had felt what it was like to lose her. He had died that night as well, and was only brought back to life when she woke up the next morning and started fighting the breathing tube. He let the memory of her brief death fuel him. When he was growing too tired to work, he thought of it. When he was becoming increasingly scared he thought of it.
"I don't want you thinking about that night," Graces urged, breaking Draco away from the memories.
"It's not like I like thinking about it," Draco huffed. "It's intrusive."
Graces was silent for a few moments and Draco internally fumed that telling her had been a stupid idea and then...
"I have similar dreams," she whispered meekly. "Only about you... if you fail."
"Well, you took care of that didn't you?" Draco whispered, a ghost of a smile touching his lips. "If I fail we are going to go away and we will all be safe."
Draco didn't believe it. He was still convinced that he had to succeed in order for them all to live, but he could pretend he believed it. He could pretend to believe it so his sister wouldn't live her days riddled with worry and so there was a possibility she would sleep easier at night. To convince her of his sincere faith in her plan, he made himself more comfortable in the bed, stole a good chunk of blankets and went to sleep.
sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
"He's so cute," Pansy cooed, leaning down from behind the sofa and peering at the tiny little one nestled on Graces' stomach.
"Isn't he though?" Graces smiled, making another silly face and lifting the child high in the air before bringing him back down. "I think he's going to be a seeker," she giggled, watching as Octavian smiled and reached his hand out to her face. "Yes you are! An amazing seeker!"
"H-he's g-going t-to s-spit up on y-you," Thomas warned, frowning over a million papers.
"No he won't," Graces scoffed, bringing Octavian down on her lips for a kiss before laying him back down on her stomach.
"He's such a happy baby," Pansy noted excitedly, ticking the child's feet and causing him to giggle. "When I have a baby I want one just as happy as Octavian. And just as pudgy too."
Thomas looked up from the paper he was writing and glanced at Octavian squirming around on Graces' torso. Graces sighed internally as she realized that Octavian hadn't grown a strong attachment for Thomas yet. He was attached to her. The moment Octavian caught sight of her coming down to the common room he smiled and cooed for her attention, but he had yet to have the same reaction for Thomas. It was still early and she was aware that after everything that had happened she had barely allowed Octavian out of her sight, but she still worried. Was only weekends enough?
"Thomas, I think you should take a break," Graces announced, sitting up from the sofa.
"I c-can't. Th-there's s-so m-much."
"Take a break, Thomas," Graces repeated, walking over to where the boy was. "Take a break, feed Octavian, play with him a little and then give him back to me when you feel a bit more refreshed."
"I d-don't s-see wh-why I ev-ven h-have to do th-this," Thomas groaned, taking Octavian. "I'm excused f-from th-this w-work."
"We already went over this," Graces tisked, giving him a look that dared him to argue with her. "You will do the work. It will help you in the long run and what helps you, helps Octavian." Thomas pursed his lips but nodded begrudgingly. "Also, don't think for one second about calling a house elf to feed him. He likes it when you do it."
"I know," Thomas muttered irritatedly. "He doesn't like magic with his nappies either."
"The squib doesn't use magic," Graces shrugged. "It's not surprising."
"He needs to be around m-magic m-more," Thomas whispered. "W-weekends aren't en-nough."
Graces didn't say anything to Thomas' statement, she watched as he continued to look down at Octavian deep in thought about what to do.
"M-mayb-be h-he sh-should s-spend m-more t-time w-with his g-grandp-parents."
"That would be nice," Graces said carefully. "But I think you should offer to have them at your place and only with your aunt present. I don't want them telling the courts that they are the child care provider. Offer it as an olive branch, like you are doing them a favor."
Thomas nodded and proceeded to take Octavian up the stairs to his room to feed him. Graces felt a little of her worry diminish as Thomas smudged up his face and tickled the little one's torso in an effort to make Octavian laugh, but she still felt that more could be done.
"I don't think you should ask him to do all this work," Pansy informed, looking at the piles and piles of paper. "It isn't right. He's suffered through a lot and-"
"It's a distraction," Graces quipped, placing the parchment down and looking at the next. "It's a distraction and it will only do him good. He won't be behind in class, he will look strong and it will teach him about responsibility."
"Octavian is teaching him about responsibility."
"Only two days a week when he gets him on the weekends," Graces pointed out. "I love Thomas. And while I would love to coddle him endlessly, I can't. Octavian will grow fast and Thomas needs to be a man long before he graduates Hogwarts."
"I just think—"
"Your opinion has been noted, Pansy," Graces dismissed, taking a quill and fixing a few errors in one of Thomas' essays.
Pansy seemed as though she wanted to argue, but the girl remained silent. Graces was silently glad that Pansy had never been raised to be confrontational. The other girl instead stood where the sofa was and picked at invisible lint, which was funny because the sofa was leather.
"Do you want to do something today?" Pansy asked after a while. "Like, something fun... We could even play Quidditch if you wanted."
Never in their friendship had Pansy offered to play Quidditch with her. Graces stared dumbfounded at her friend, unsure of even how to approach this.
Why are you so surprised? Pansy is a good friend. Don't forget who did your makeup when you broke your arm, who is the first to mention your birthday coming up and who helped you use the loo just weeks ago when you couldn't get up and go yourself. She even cleaned you up. I think you're starting to look at her for how she treats Neville rather than how she treats you and it isn't right.
"I, uh, that's so nice, Pans, but my arm still needs to heal from that injury in October," Graces said awkwardly. Pansy nodded, and became quiet again. "But maybe we could take Octavian to the courtyard and you and I could grab some magazines and start placing our wardrobe order for the spring?" Graces offered, realizing she shouldn't be so short with someone who has cared so much for her.
"That sounds like a plan," Pansy smiled. "I'll get Millie. We can shop for Draco and Octavian too."
"Shop for Draco?" Graces laughed. "Really?"
"I love him in suits. We should order him more."
Graces twisted her mouth, trying not to smile, before giving in and agreeing.
"Thomas could do some of this work out there too," Graces pointed out. "We can just bring some blankets for Octavian, set up warming charms, and bundle up."
"We can buy Thomas his spring wardrobe as well," Pansy squealed with joy.
"Y-You w-will d-d-do no such th-thing," Thomas broke in standing on the stairs wide eyed, clutching Octavian close to him.
"Oh, my Thomas darling, I just love how you think you have a choice in the matter," Graces grinned.