I Am Not Nothing

By SpadeisWriting

121K 2.6K 2K

Raven is the daughter of Professor Snape. Being raised on the view of being the youngest, brightest, most pow... More

Prologue: Who Is Raven?
Chapter Two
Chapter three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen (Fourteen part 2)
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
A/N

Chapter One

11.8K 208 307
By SpadeisWriting

I rolled out of bed as the sun was peaking through the crack between my black curtains. Mumbling curses under my breath, I walked over to the window, covering my eyes, preparing for when I tore open the curtains to light up my room.

It was a nice autumn day, that I was fearing to see. I slowly opened my eyes, and I instantly regretted it as I was quickly blinded by the bright sun.

I walked over to my closet, looking through my array of black and green shirts and skirts. I chose a knee-length black skirt and a dark green tank top. I quickly got changed as I began to smell breakfast being made. I threw on some black socks and walked over to my vanity. I brushed my hair and watched as it quickly turned into a puff of frizzy mess.

"Zimsy!" I called.

In my mirror, I saw a house-elf appear at my door and walk over to me. She worked on my hair until it was in normal ringlets again. She put my hair into a high ponytail, securing it with my favourite dark green elastic, with a snake decor on it.

"Anything else, Miss Snape?" Zimsy asked me.

"That will be all," I told her.

She nodded, then snapped her fingers and disapparated. I grabbed the silver snake bracelet from my vanity and secured it onto my wrist. I never went anywhere without the bracelet. It was a family heirloom and if I didn't have it, I would panic. I fixed the necklace around my neck. My father gave it to me for my tenth birthday. The charm was an eagle. My father said this was the "Ravenclaw symbol". At this time, I had no idea what a "Ravenclaw" was. I walked out of my room, closing the dark oak door behind me and I made my way toward the stairs. I walked down, counting the steps as I went. The number never changed, it was always nine steps, but I always had to count them. If I missed a step, I would go back up to the top and count again. When I made it to the bottom of the stairs, I walked into the living room.

"Good morning, Father. What is in the Daily Prophet today?" I asked him, sitting in the large armchair beside him.

I took the mug of tea next to me, already placed by the house-elves. I took a sip, then placed it back on the table between my father and me.

"Nothing interesting to you." My father told me, looking over the paper to look at me.

I sighed, disappointed. I was just waiting for the day that the paper would say that my Auntie Trix was released from Azkaban.

"Bellatrix won't be released until the Dark Lord has risen again." My father told me.

I nodded, looking at my feet. He tapped on the table to grab my attention again.

"Until that day comes, I would suggest you forget about her. It does you no good to expect her to be out any time soon." He said, no expression written on his face.

I quickly got upset about him telling me to forget about her. How could I forget about her? She was one of my favourite people! But I held my tongue, knowing that I would be punished for such behaviour. Instead, I nodded.

"Alright, Father," I said to him, showing just as little emotion as he did.

"Now, Lily, you should eat something. We're going to the Malfoy's soon." My father said, looking back at his paper.

With that, I got up and walked to the dining room. I sat on my side of the table.

"Haltak!" I called to the elf in the kitchen.

The small elf came walking into the dining room with a plate levitating behind him.

"Breakfast is served, Miss Snape." The elf said, letting the plate land silently before me.

"Thank you, Haltak," I said to him, beginning to eat the toast, bacon and eggs.

As I was eating, my father walked into the dining room and sat across the table from me.

"How is your food? Did the elf make it well enough?" My father asked, coldly.

He didn't particularly like Haltak, but I did, which was why he was still with us.

"Haltak did well, father. You're not going to get rid of him." I said to him, not bothering with my manners.

"Watch your tongue, Lily. I will not hesitate to leave you out with the werewolves tonight." He threatened.

I let my eyes widen, my heart thudding in my chest. He's left me outside overnight before, but I quickly remembered that tonight was a full moon. Werewolves were the only things I feared in this world. Not even the Dark Lord scared me. But werewolves did it.

"I apologize, father. I like Haltak very much. He is a great cook." I told him.

"A cook with an attitude that I do not appreciate." He said disgustedly.

I took a bite of my toast, shrugging at my father's words.

"I came in here for a reason." He told me.

This caught my attention quickly. I snapped my head up to look at him.

"You have been given the opportunity to go to Hogwarts with me a year early. There will be nothing to do at the Malfoy's while I'm at school this year because Draco will be starting school this year." He informed me, placing my acceptance letter in front of me.

I let the information sink in. No one has ever been able to go to Hogwarts early. I, of course, was an exception because I was my father's daughter.

"But," my father added, tearing me from my thoughts, "although you are the youngest student at the school, you will be treated like every other student. No favouring. No getting away with anything. You are smarter than a lot of kids there, so you should know what you should and should not do. Meaning the dumb façade will not work on any of the teachers." He explained to me strictly, making sure I understood.

Of course, I did; I wasn't stupid. I was probably smarter than a high majority of the kids there. And I was ten.

"I understand, when are we leaving?" I asked him.

"The train leaves today at eleven sharp." He said to me.

"Shall I go pack then?" I asked him.

"That won't be necessary. Your elf has done it for you already." My father said to me.

I nodded. I finished eating and pushed the plate to the side for Haltak to retrieve.

"We need to leave for the Manor now." My father said to me standing and walking out of the dining room.

I quickly followed him to the foyer. I put on my black flats with a strap that crossed over the foot. Zimsy was there waiting for me to finish with my shoes, holding up the black cloak that matched my father's.

"Are you ready, Lily?" My father asked.

I nodded. My father held his arm out to me. We took our bags and when I took my father's arm, we apparated out of our home and appeared at the front door of the Malfoy Manor. I knocked on the door five times and waited for someone to answer. When the door opened, I looked down to see Dobby standing before us.

"Glad to see you again Dobby," I said to the house-elf.

"It is a pleasure to be in your presence. It has been too long. Too long, Raven Snape, too long." He said to me.

I giggled at his words, more like how he said them. Still holding my father's arm we walked in and hung our cloaks on the rack.

"What a nice surprise, Severus. I wish I knew you were coming." Lucius said to my father as he walked into the large foyer.

His eyes landed on me and he stopped.

"Oh, as well as your daughter. It is a pleasure to see you again, my dear." He said coldly.

"You as well, Mr Malfoy," I said back to him, feeling just as unimpressed to see him as he was to see me.

"Watch your tone, Raven." He warned.

He and my father glared down at me. I knew my father wanted me to apologize, but Lucius deserved the tone. If he could use it on me, then I could use it on him. Instead, I left my bag with my father and allowed myself to walk into the kitchen where Narcissa was.

"Cissy!" I exclaimed, running to her.

"Oh good morning, RL!" She exclaimed to me, picking me up and hugging me.

I wrapped my arms around her neck. This woman was like a mother to me. She spoiled me while I was at the Manor.

"Cookies?" She asked me, setting me onto the counter.

"I can't have all that junk, remember?" I reminded her as she got down a jar of cookies from the cupboard.

"Your father doesn't have to know." She whispered.

I shook my head and reached to the fruit bowl instead, taking an apple.

"Mother, why is Professor Snape here?" A boys voice asked.

As I saw the blond boy enter the kitchen, I jumped off the counter and ran to him, leaving my apple on the counter.

"Rave, you're here!" He exclaimed, crashing into me.

His arms wrapped around my waist as mine wrapped around his neck. I heard Narcissa laugh behind us.

"I didn't know you were coming!" Draco exclaimed.

"I just found out this morning," I told him.

We walked over to the counter and jumped up, sitting on either side of the cookie jar. Draco started to chow down on the cookies, while I stuck with my apple.

"How's Haltak and Zimsy?" Draco asked.

I giggled, "They're good. Father is about to get rid of Haltak. The only thing keeping him around is his cooking. If I didn't like his cooking, he'd be gone." I explained to the boy.

"Who else would you have? You can't replace Haltak!" Draco exclaimed.

I agreed with him, taking another bite of my apple. Narcissa went to join my father and Lucius. Draco and I were alone in the kitchen, eating our cookies and apples.

"Have you packed for Hogwarts yet?" I asked Draco.

"Yeah. Dobby's bringing it down so it's ready for when we leave." He told me.

I was excited to tell Draco about me going to Hogwarts. But I also wanted to wait till we got on the train for him to figure it out on his own. I wanted to see him confused as to why I was going to get on the train with him.

"Draco, RL, we're getting ready to leave for the Alley," Narcissa told us, walking back into the kitchen.

Diagon Alley. Where we would be getting all of our supplies. Maybe here he would find out that I was going to Hogwarts. Or maybe he would be oblivious to all of it. Draco and I hopped off the counter. I grabbed another apple, leaving the last apple's core on the counter for the elves. Draco grabbed another cookie. We walked out of the kitchen, joining the adults. I put on my cloak and walked over to my father. My father held his arm out to me. I linked my arm with his, holding my apple in my linked arm's hand and grabbed my bag with the other. Draco took his mother's arm, while his father took Draco's trunk.

"See you at the Alley, Daco," I said to him.

"I bet we'll be there first." He laughed.

I laughed at him and we apparated out of the Manor. My father and I appeared in front of a shop called 'Ollivanders'. I looked up at my father, confused.

"You need a wand." My father said to me and started toward the shop.

I threw my apple away and followed my father into the shop. I was quickly engulfed in darkness. It was a dark shop, which I enjoyed. There were shelves upon shelves filled with small boxes.

"Severus Snape, to what do I have the pleasure today?" A man behind the shop's desk called.

"We need a wand for my daughter." My father said to him.

I looked up at the man. His eyes widened.

"Raven Snape," I said, holding out my hand to him.

He shook my hand introducing himself as Mr Ollivander.

"I never thought this day would come. I am honoured to be giving you your first wand, Miss Raven." Mr Ollivander said to me.

He walked towards the shelves of boxes. He carefully looked through them. He came across a light brown box. He took it and brought it over to the counter.

"I'm not sure, but consider this, a simple mahogany wand. The length is just a bit over ten and one-half inches long. The core consists of a strand of unicorn hair." He told me.

He opened the box, and sure enough, there was a dark wand with a red-ish hue to it. I did find it a nice colour, but I knew this wasn't how to choose a wand. Technically, you don't even choose the wand. The wand chooses you. Mr Ollivander took out the wand and carefully handed it to me. I took it, letting my grip hold the end firmly.

"Give it a flick." Mr Ollivander told me.

I did as he said and flicked the wand. Books flew from their spot, crashing onto the floor. I jumped at the loud crash, quickly giving the wand back.

"That one will not do." He said, putting the wand back.

He put the wand onto the shelves. He walked away from where he was before, checking another shelf. He said a maybe to himself, taking down a darker box than before. He brought it over, setting it in front of me. He handed me the wand.

"This is a detailed pine wand. In length, it is just a bit over eleven and three-quarters inches long. It has a phoenix feather core." He explained to me.

I took the wand and gave it a flick. This time a vase smashed to pieces.

"I truly apologise, Mr Ollivander!" I exclaimed to him, placing the wand back in its box.

"That is quite alright. I've had many things destroyed here. I should be getting something for the kids to aim at that can't get destroyed." He said to me.

He took the box and put it back, now going to another shelf closer to the back of the store. He came back with a black box. This box intrigued me greatly.

"I don't think this one will be it, but there's no harm trying it. This is an oddly-formed rosewood wand. It's twelve and three-quarter inches long. Its core is dragon heartstring." Mr Ollivander said, handing me a curved wand, shaped much like my Auntie Trix's.

It was a burgundy wand, beautiful despite its odd shape. The fact that it had a dragon heartstring core made me hopeful that this wand would choose me because of what I've read about wand cores in my Mastering Wands book.

"Lily, are you going to test it?" My father asked me.

I looked up at his dark eyes that matched my own. I looked at the wand and took it. The moment my fingers touched the wand, orbs of light in the shape of butterflies flew around the shop. A gust of wind, coming from nowhere flew around us. I laughed at the sight. Nothing bad was happening. Quite the opposite.

"You have been united with your wand. This wand chooses you." Mr Ollivander said to me.

"Foolish to say that I am in love with a wand, but I love this wand. It's perfect." I told him.

My father paid for the wand and we walked out of the shop.

"Look who it is! Hiya, Rave!" I heard a boy's voice call.

I looked over to see the Malfoy's walking up to us.

"Daco, I found my wand! Rosewood with a dragon heartstring core, twelve and three-quarter inches!" I exclaimed.

"We're going to get mine now." He said.

To my surprise, he didn't question as to why I was getting my wand a year early. The Malfoys went into the shop we had just left.

"Let's go, Lily, we need to get your supplies." My father said to me, beginning to walk away.

I quickly followed behind him, dragging my trunk behind me. We went to another shop called 'Flourish and Blotts'. My father found the right books for my first-year classes. We left and then we needed to go to Madam Malkins Robes for All Occasions to get my school robes. We were quickly in and out with everything I needed.

"Rave, do you have everything? It's almost eleven." I heard Draco call.

"Lily, I need to go get a few more things before we leave. Stay with the Malfoys for a while. Leave without me if you need to." My father told me blankly.

I knew not to question what he was doing, so I just nodded. I dragged my trunk, filled with new things as well as my old, over to join the Malfoys. I waved to my father as he walked away.

"Come on, we have to go get my robes!" Draco exclaimed.

He began to walk away from Madam Malkins. I looked at Narcissa, confused.

"The robes shop is right here. Where is Daco going?" I asked Narcissa.

"We don't go to Madam Malkins. We go to Twilfitt and Tatting's." Narcissa said to me, taking my hand.

We followed close behind Draco. We soon came to a more posh looking clothing store. We walked in and walked straight to the robes. I waited for Draco to find his robes, taking a surprisingly long time for a boy. Once we got out, it was nearly time to get to the station and my father was nowhere to be seen. With the Malfoys, we apparated to King's Cross Station.

"Where's the platform?" Draco asked.

"Platform nine and three-quarters is this way. Just follow us and do what we say." Narcissa told her son.

Draco and I followed his parent to platforms nine and ten. But there were no platform nine and three-quarters.

"Run through the wall between platforms nine and ten," Narcissa ordered.

Not disobeying his mother, Draco grabbed his belongings and ran toward the wall. He didn't run into it, however. He ran straight through.

"Your turn, RL," Narcissa said to me.

I nodded, grabbing my things and ran toward the wall, knowing that the same thing would happen to me as it did with Draco. I was soon through the wall, on the other side. This platform was filled with people. Wizards and witches of all ages were crowded onto this platform.

"Come along, children," Narcissa said to Draco and me.

We followed Narcissa through the crowd of people. We reached a group of kids all giving the train crew their luggage. We waited for our turn to hand the people our luggage. When we did we walked away from that part of the train, making our way toward where we would be getting on. We stood in a clear enough location. We stood in our small group looking at the other families. Some kids were already saying goodbye to their parents and getting on the train.

"Look, there are the Weasels. Kissing their pathetic child goodbye. Those blood traitors dare to call themselves wizards." Lucius spat.

As much as I hated Lucius, I couldn't help but agree. Muggles were nothing great. They were anything but great. We were superior beings. They could only wish to be as great as us. And as long as they believed that magic was just a fairytale, they would go unharmed. They're nothing but filthy muggles. That was all they would ever be.

"Hey Rave, I just remembered, you're ten! What are you doing preparing to go to Hogwarts?" Draco asked, turning to me.

I giggled, "I was given an opportunity to go a year early with my father and you." I said to him.

"Okay, when you get onto the train, you need to find Gregory Goyle and Vincent Crabbe, got it?" Lucius said to us sternly.

We both nodded, understanding completely. Suddenly Narcissa reached into her cloak pocket and pulled out a black velvet box.

"This Draco," She said, handing the blond boy the box, "in a special gift. If you ever feel homesick, or alone, though that will be difficult with RL always at your side, you just remember this. I want you to wear it every day. That way, your family will always be with you." She explained to him.

Draco opened the box. Inside was a bracelet. It was a replica of my own.

"Is it a death eater heirloom?" I asked Narcissa.

She looked over at me, smiling instead of being a bit irritated like I thought she would be.

"Your family and my family were very close. We made a promise to keep it that way. You two have matching bracelets. Your father's only child, and our only child, have the same bracelets. It isn't just some cute matching thing, RL. This is like a forever promise to stay together and protect each other no matter what happens. Do you understand what I'm saying?" She asked me.

I nodded and looked over at Draco, who was putting his bracelet on his wrist. The train whistle blew and we saw kids start to rush onto the train.

"Go be great. Don't let any Mudbloods forget who you are as a superior pureblood." Lucius said to Draco.

Draco hugged his mother and began to walk to the train. Lucius turned to me. When Draco was out of hearing range, he spoke to me.

"You make me proud, Raven. As much as I don't like to show it. I am proud. A half-blood like you, acting with as much as your magic blood has to offer and doesn't take any muggle in you as an excuse. You act like a pureblood does and believes the same as us. With that, I am sincerely proud to call you my son's friend." He said to me.

I smiled at him. This was the first time he has ever said something remotely nice to me. It made me the happiest I've ever been. To make Lucius proud of me was an accomplishment that has never happened before. And for that, I was grateful.

"Thank you, Mr Malfoy. I will continue to make you proud. I promise." I told him.

"Don't make promises you can't keep. Now, go or you will miss the train." He said to me.

I nodded and ran toward the train. I hopped onto it. I walked through the train looking into the compartments that lined the hall. Soon, I found Draco, two other boys and a girl. I walked into the compartment and sat next to Draco who sat next to a taller boy with very little hair.

"Daco, who are these people?" I asked my best friend.

Draco smiled down at me before looking back at the others.

"Guys, this is my best friend, Raven Snape. Rave, this is Pansy Parkinson, Crabbe and Goyle." He introduced.

The two across from us were Pansy and Crabbe. The boy next to Draco was Goyle.

"So you already have a best friend?" Parkinson asked me, pouting.

"Daco's my best friend. And he will always be my best friend." I told her, blankly.

She slumped into her seat and looked at the floor.

"You're Snape's kid?" Goyle asked me, looking past Draco.

"Raven Lily Celestia Snape. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance." I said to him.

"Polite, but cold. I like her." Parkinson said to Draco.

He nodded and smiled, "I know who to hang around. Rave is one of those people." He told the girl.

Parkinson nodded and turned back to me.

"You know, you don't look a lot like a Snape other than you having your dad's hair colour and eyes. You know, I could straighten your hair for you and see how you feel about it?" She suggested.

I glared at her for a moment.

"My father tells me I look a lot like my mother and to never try to change how I look. So, I'm sorry, I will be declining that offer." I said to her, coldly.

I looked away from the overly enthusiastic girl. I heard her tell Draco, 'I like her,' again and I knew there was no getting away from her. I already found her annoying and I knew she was too close to Draco than I appreciated. No one but his parents could be as close to him as I was. She had to back off. He was my best friend. Not hers.

"Sorry to bother you five, but have you seen a toad anywhere? Some kid called Neville lost one." A girl with bushy hair asked, barging in without even knocking.

"Excuse me, that was rude, don't you think?" I asked her, "You should have at least knocked before opening the door." I snapped.

The girl glared at me and flipped her hair over her shoulder before leaving. I looked at the others, completely disgusted.

"She reeked of muggle," I told them, coldly.

"She certainly is her father's child," Crabbe said.

I mocked a laugh before shutting my mouth and glaring at him. I was quiet for the rest of the train ride. There wasn't anything to do except watch the sweets cart go by every twenty minutes or so. Each time, the others would get something to munch on, except me. What I would give to eat an apple right about now.

"Have you heard? Harry Potter is on this train! The boy-who-lived is attending Hogwarts in the year below us, isn't that exciting?" I heard a girl say to her friend as they walked by.

My eyes almost popped out of my sockets when I heard what I heard. I whipped my head over to look at Draco.

"Daco, Harry Potter is attending Hogwarts this year too!" I told him.

He looked over to me.

"What are you talking about? That can't be true! Surely, if they were smart, they would try to hide him. Wouldn't they?" Draco asked me.

"I would assume so, but seeing as they call this the safest place on Earth, where else would he be safer?" I asked him.

We all knew about Harry Potter. The boy-who-lived. I instantly hated the boy. We all knew, if the Dark Lord was to rise again, he would come straight to Hogwarts, because that's where he is 'safest'. Of course, along with hating Harry Potter, Draco loved the sound of gaining popularity through Potter. I enjoyed the idea of being popular too, but I didn't need Potter for that! Who needed Potter? Popular Potter in all of his pathetic glory. Poor Potter better watch his back, because no one is more loyal than me when it comes to the Dark Lord, dead or alive.

A/n

Word count: 4456

I hope you enjoyed this very long first chapter. I very much enjoyed writing it and I look forward to writing the rest of this book!

KK! See you later! 

Luvz, Spade

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