Lance is gentle.
Keith leaned into the kiss, tugging on his hair to bring him closer. Lance's hands supported his back as his fingers tugged the dress zipper down.
He always knows what to do.
Lance's breath licked his neck as it travelled down his collarbone. His teeth latched onto the bra strap and tugged. His eyes flashed with a sexy ocean blue.
Whenever I'm depressed, he's always there. Even when we're states away, he'll show up and rock me to sleep.
Keith let out a small whimper and covered his mouth with the back of his hand.
Lance's concerned eyes shot up, "Are you okay?"
Keith's left leg was draped over Lance's shoulder. In the dim light of their new bedroom, they lied together tangled in crisp mountain breeze sheets. Lance peeled back the band of Keith's boxers and stared up at him, "Do you want me to stop?"
Keith's eyes teared up a little.
Very soon, I will die. My body will be lowered into the ground as he watches helplessly from above. I'll leave behind a broken man that jumps in whole-heartedly and loves so deeply.
Keith shook his head and uncovered his mouth, "Please don't stop."
Lance gave him a nod slid his boxers off his legs.
Anything could happen. Maybe he moves on and has kids. Maybe he'll die alone or throw himself off a bridge. But I can't do anything about it because I will be dead.
Keith threw his head back and cried out. Lance supported him with kisses across his collarbone and shoulder. Each thrust brought another firework of sparks and unexplored sensations. Keith never knew something so intimate could feel so liberating. That being so open with someone could be a major strength rather than a greatest weakness. He never knew that sex didn't take anything from him, it gave a bountiful harvest of gifts-a connection, a lifeline, a home.
Lance stopped and rushed to cup his cheeks, "Hey. Hey. What's wrong?"
Keith gasped for breath and gave him a confused look. "What?"
Lance scrunched his eyebrows and wiped Keith's cheek with his thumbs. "You're crying." Keith reached up to rub his eyes as Lance let out a nervous chuckle, "Am I that bad? Does it hurt?"
Keith stared at the tear on his finger for moment. His voice was quiet and shaky, "No, it's really good." His throat tightened again. "It's really good."
"Okay uh," he held back a laugh, "Then what's wrong?"
I'm gonna die. Lance will live and move on with his life however he sees fit. At any time, I could drop dead right in front of him. I gave up. I gave up on trying. On fighting. I decided it was better to die than fight to stay alive. How pathetic.
Keith's eyes locked onto Lance's. "I don't wanna die."
Lance's jaw dropped, "What?"
Keith hesitantly shook his head, "I don't wanna die." He cupped Lance's cheeks and pulled their foreheads together. "I don't wanna die. Don't let me die."
"Keith," Lance stroked his cheeks, "What are you saying?"
Keith's chest bounced with a laugh, "I'll leave Hospice. I'll start chemo and do whatever the doctors say." He wrapped his arms around Lance's neck and gave him a quick kiss. "Start moving."
Lance's eyes shimmered. He nodded and picked up his thrusting again.
"Ah!" Keith dug his nails into Lance's shoulder. "I don't want to leave you."
Lance kissed his neck, leaving marks wherever he could. "I don't wanna leave you either."
Keith's hands desperately clung to Lance's body. This was it. Everything they lived through-cancer, car accidents, comas-they all led up to this moment.
I'm not ready to give up. I don't want to die-I never did. All I wanted was someone to be there, to support me, to love me. It was always Lance. From the very beginning. He was always there.
Keith woke up slowly, eyes fighting against the sunlight. He stretched his lungs and arms with a big yawn. When he went to move his right hand, he stopped and smiled down at it. Lance lied behind him in deep sleep. His arm was draped over Keith's shoulders, intertwining their fingers and holding him close.
Keith turned his head back and kissed his nose. Lance left his lips parted when he slept. His eyelids were gently closed and his jaw was relaxed. His bedhead was Keith's favorite thing about it. Lance's macchiato hair had a mind of its own. It curled in various directions; some stuck to his head while others reached out to the world. Keith stifled his laugh and turned back around to cuddle back into his arms. "I love you, you dork."
A little longer won't hurt.