What, in an ordinary person's opinion, would be the worst part of their day? Our daily schedules vary according to each day of the week, but there's one thing that's constant; a routine we cannot afford to change.
Getting out of bed.
Perhaps, one of the most difficult and heart breaking tasks of my day is leaving the comfort of my bed, the warmth of my blanket and the soft, fluffy surface of the mattress to get ready and tackle a day like any other. I'd remain wrapped in a warm blanket while the spine chilling weather outside my window would destroy whatever little part of me wanted to get out of bed and get ready for school. I'd regret reading the time when my excruciatingly bright phone screen would scream into my eyes, 7:00 am.
'Two minutes more', my subconscious would plead.
That was what it felt like, sitting against the wall and being held by Xiumin in silence. I didn't even realize when my hands raised up to his shoulders, clutching his shirt into fists. The thunder was long gone, the pattering of rain against the window was slowly dissipating, but none of us wanted to move away. It was surprising how nobody had even come to call us for dinner yet.
I had learned something new about Xiumin; he was persuasive. He knew exactly what strings to pull in order to make things go his way. It sort of reminded me of Jun. He was good at manipulating, convincing and to an extent confusing people too.
We heard a soft knock on the door, breaking my chain of thoughts. Xiumin jumped a little, then turned to look in the direction of the closed door.
"Oppa?" Another wave of guilt washed over me as I heard her voice, carefully calling out to him, worried that she might be intruding. "Can I come inside?" Yojeung asked. I was having an internal debate on whether I should move away or just stay like this. It would be unfair on her part and low on my part if I mistook his act of kindness in a wrong way.
"Do you want to go?" Xiumin asked as he slightly pulled away to look at me. "I can tell her we'll be late."
Two minutes more, I wanted to say, but I shook my head and loosened my hold on him. It was still dark and I couldn't see his face, but I could tell he was disappointed. There was something about his body language. The way his hands dropped to the sides, the way his fingers untangled themselves from my hair or the way he shifted an inch away. He clearly didn't want to, but it was an undeniable fact that this guy listened to the voice in his head, more than the one in his heart.
I heard him inhale deeply as if he was composing himself. "The door is stuck. Can you push it from the outside?" He asked, his voice back to its normal tone.
"Get away from the door." Yojeung warned before we heard a loud thud from the old wooden door. It took her a couple of attempts, but she finally managed to push it open. "You should've called us earlier if you were stuck inside." She said as she pointed the flashlight in our direction. I used my hand to block the painfully bright light from my vision.
"You couldn't hear me when I called and the reception in this place is pretty bad, so we couldn't give you a phone call either." I explained.
We headed downstairs with Yojeung guiding us through the dim passage. The Hellions were already in the living room, talking and being their usual fun selves as they ate the dinner Maeji and gang prepared for all of them. Everyone went quiet when we arrived, all eyes turned in our direction, looking at us like we were their prey. Like, they were a bunch of Hyenas and we were an injured, defenseless lion.
"Why are you looking at us like that?" Xiumin asked as Yojeung made her way towards the empty seat beside Suho. There were only four chairs around the dining table, so the rest of them had resorted to sitting on the couch and floor with Sehun and Gwen sitting on the chair across Yojeung and Suho.
"Are we?" Kai asked, his lips curved into a smile. They all just went back to eating, but it was quieter now. I knew the type of impatient, intruders the lot of them were. Sehun looked like he was holding back from saying something until we comfortably sat down to eat dinner with them.
"Come here and tell me if you want more." Baekhyun said as he served the weird looking food that I assumed was fried rice with some sort of side dish with it. It didn't look or smell good, but I still smiled at him, hoping to mask the hint of disgust on my face. "Don't give me that fake smile, this tastes better than what it looks. We made this without Chanyeol's help." He said in defense.
"Yeah, I worked really hard on it. You better appreciate it." Kai added.
"Putting a pinch of salt into the container doesn't count as hard work." Haru commented and I noticed how Xiumin didn't look up even once as he dug in. Either the weird looking side dish was just that tasty or perhaps, he was trying not to look at someone in particular.
I put a spoonful of it into my mouth and chewed carefully. It was a little burnt and they forgot to wash the vegetables before cooking them, but "I like the flavour." I smiled at them.
"Look at her give us fake responses." Chen snorted.
"Yeah, it actually tastes like shit. You guys forgot to wash the vegetables you used so we're probably eating dirt right now, but I'm trying to be nice because you keep on talking about making this without Chanyeol's help." I said, stuffing another spoonful into my mouth. He asked for it. "But on a second thought, isn't Kyungsoo the master chef here?" I asked.
"Kyungsoo likes to cook by himself or with people that are good at cooking." Maeji supplied. "He gave up on teaching them when we were still in highschool."
"He once called me a dipshit and kicked me outside the kitchen because I put water in a container of boiling oil. How was I supposed to know?" I widened my eyes at Baekhyun when he said that. How haven't they burned themselves yet?
"So, are you guys official now?" Sehun asked out of nowhere, but he didn't mention a name so I didn't dare look up.
"That's not how you should put it." Chen whined.
All eyes were darted on me because I was the only one engaged in the conversation. It's really unfair how I'm the only one facing this uncomfortable interrogation right now. Ask Xiumin too. He's involved as well.
I slowly looked up to them. "Are you guys talking to me?" I asked.
"Don't play innocent. You're really bad at acting." Kai gave me bored look. "Did you confess? Or did he?" He asked.
"We already told you what happened. Don't make it weird by asking unnecessary questions." I replied and avoided eye contact before stuffing more food into my mouth so I wouldn't have to talk. I looked at Yojeung who just shrugged at them. How isn't she reacting to it? Wasn't she dating Xiumin? Or did I misunderstand their relationship? Is she okay with them teasing us like this because as a girlfriend, I wouldn't be okay with it.
"It's fine, let's forget it. I'm bored. Do you guys want to play something?" Luhan asked.
"How about 'Truth or Dare'?" Sehun suggested, receiving looks of disapproval from most of them.
"How about you don't give us suggestions?" Chen retorted and got a whole spoon thrown at him by Sehun, but he successfully dodged it.
"I can narrate a ghost story." Inha chirped. "So, back in our town there was a graveyard that had headless statues of-" We heard a loud protest from the couch where Lay and Maeji were seated.
"If you're talking about scary things, then I'm going to sleep." Tao yelled.
"But the story is really good. Those statues had real blood on-" Inha continued, smiling secretly as he closed his ears.
"Do you guys want to play Beer Pong?" Baekhyun asked.
The room went silent, since everyone were just exchanging skeptic looks. They were all probably wondering whether they should play or not. I had never heard of the game, so I remained quiet.
"No." We heard a sharp response from one corner of the room. "Sarang is underage, so we're not going to involve alcohol into this." Xiumin said, his tone firm, leaving no room for argument.
"Come on." Baekhyun whined, then shifted his gaze in my direction. "I bet you want to try a little bit." He eyed me suggestively.
"No Baekhyun, we can't be bad influence." Suho spoke up. "It's not up to you or her. Which one of you brought alcohol in the first place?" He added.
Why were they making a big deal out of this? I had already tried alcohol once and it wasn't something I wanted to put in my mouth again. I liked warm and sweet stuff. Things that melted in my mouth or things that comfortably slid down my throat. Alcohol was bitter and had a strong, unpleasant smell to it.
"We need to wake up early tomorrow for training, so let's just go to sleep." Gwen suggested, only to receive whines and protests from some of them.
"We can always play tomorrow evening after our training." Tao said and they just slumped their shoulders and began cleaning up. We put all the paper plates and cups in a plastic bag and set it aside. We can take all this trash back with us so that it can be disposed off properly.
Everyone were just going back to their rooms when I noticed Xiumin talking to Gwen from my peripheral vision. She widened her eyes at what he said and then nodded in response. Xiumin raked his fingers through his dark hair as he ended their conversation and turned to leave for his room, without sparing me a glance. Should I thank him? I don't know how many times he has helped me and taken care of me and I haven't shown the slightest gesture of gratitude. Should I call out to him? Will it make things awkward? What if I draw the attention of the other Hellions around us?
"Why are you standing in the middle of the room like an idiot?" I heard Maeji's voice behind me.
"You're the idiot." I replied. I hate how we've gotten so close that she's already talking informally to me. Plus, she has come terms to my level of language. "I was just looking at-"
She didn't let me finish. "Xiumin?"
"Xiumin." I parroted. "No- Not Xiumin, the window. It's open and it's raining outside. We should close it." I headed towards the window, expecting her to give up talking to me like she always does, but instead, she followed me.
"Whom are you trying to avoid?" She asked.
"You." I replied.
"Why? Do I make you uncomfortable?" Maeji raised her eyebrows suggestively, a playful grin on her face. Why is she like this? She can blend in with any situation, take the shape of any container. She probably doesn't even know the spelling of uncomfortable.
"Hyung, these girls are talking about weird things." We heard Sehun yell from one end of the living room. Every individual among them is a different kind of pain. If Maeji is the mother of all headaches, Sehun is diarrhea.
"I'm going to sleep." I said and turned around to walk away, but she immediately blocked my way. "What do you want?" I asked in defeat.
"Today morning, when we came to pick you up, I wanted to pack your bags so that you wouldn't face any inconvenience later." She started. Fear slowly crept up, like an exam hour nearing by every second. You aren't prepared to write the answers, but there's nothing you can do about it. "I know you're going to think of this as an invasion of privacy, but I saw something in your drawer. I thought there were essentials in that drawer, so I opened it, but I found a bunch of..." She hesitated. "Knives."
"So?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at her. Heck, this really was like an exam. I had to play it cool and pretend like I knew the answers or I'd fail. "How does that concern you? I'd appreciate it if you mind your own business." It was rude, I know, but Maeji is the type of person that doesn't know when to stop. If I don't stop this here, then she'll dive into my deepest secrets even before I can blink my eyes.
"It doesn't concern me." Her voice became firm, somewhat similar to Xiumin's when he gets serious. "But it concerns Mr. Shin. Choose. Do you want to tell it to him or to me?" Her soft and comforting tone was gone, replaced by a demanding one. I knew she wouldn't let it go easily.
"It's a hobby. I like to collect sharp objects." I lied. Please buy it and leave this topic alone.
She narrowed her eyes at me suspiciously. "They looked like a bunch of local knives, Sarang. Who are you trying to trick here?" Maeji asked in disbelief.
"What if I don't want to tell you? What if I don't trust you enough? Do you think it's right for you to force me like this?" I asked, hoping that would hurt her feelings and she would ask me to fuck off before leaving for her room, but Maeji is really smart and shameless.
The corner of her lip lifted into a smirk. "I trust myself, so I'll make you say it. If not me, it's going to be some adult that can talk to you. Choose, Mr. Shin, Mr. Kang or your class teacher. I won't even think before taking this to your school authorities. They'll have counsellors that can-" Maeji's unnecessary babble was getting to me. The curses and insults were slowly filling up my throat. A balloon that was bloating and if the flow of air into it wasn't stopped, it would burst. That's what happened to me.
"I'm not retarded, you wench!" I yelled at her, interrupting her mid sentence. "It's not wrong to want to be safe. That drawer filled with knives is meant to protect me if I ever need it. It's meant to stab people when they cross the line they're not supposed to. I have one in my pocket too. Do you want to see it? Do you know how glad you should be that I didn't stab you or Kai today morning because I had one below my bed too. I brought it along. I always have one in my bag, so don't fucking mess with my head." I let it out, yelled at her indignantly not regretting one bit of it. She started it, by messing with the chords I had never let anyone touch. Not even Young Mi or Jun.
My throat was clogging up, but I wouldn't cry in front of her. I took a deep breath, composed my ragged breathing and swallowed the lump in my throat. "I don't hate you." I said, in a calmer tone this time. "I've developed a liking to you and the other Hellions. It might sound like nothing to you, but breaking the shell around me to let you in isn't an easy thing. It took me lot of internal debates and lot of confusion, but I'm getting there. Don't end up making me hate you."
And then I went back to to my room, only to find Gwen placing a really thick blanket on the bed we were supposed to share. I gave her a questioning look, since that blanket wasn't there in afternoon, so why did she bring it? It wasn't that cold outside.
"You can use this blanket to cover yourself if the thunderstorm returns. It'll help you feel safer." Gwen suggested. "And keep your headphones beside the bed, so that you don't have to go around looking for it, just in case." She smiled. So, that's what he was telling her.
I obliged and went back to sleep thinking of Xiumin.
It was one hell of a day.
Surprise, I'm alive!
My exams are still going on and I hate the council for this, but I'll probably update more regularly in April maybe?
Do you guys hate Sarang for the way she behaved with Maeji in this chapter?
Btw, the above picture of Maeji is just, too beautiful. <3
Leave your opinions in the comments.