updated early, cause i love you
SONG CHOICE FOR THE BOOK IS: River - Bishop Briggs
I stormed into the safety of my room, wrapping my arms around my waist as that rogue's scent lingered on my clothes, my wolf arguing with me as I ignored her. Someplace deep inside of me I felt I was at wrong for not accepting my mate, but my anger was consuming me and my morals and principles were gravely important than what my wolf wants. The pack's safety was being threatened, if this wolf does not give us what we need, then I had to prepare, as future Alpha, for a war. I grit my teeth as my mind flashes back to him, how in the low light, his taut muscles were seen and how his eyes were scaring me from the inside and out. My insides churned and my skin tingled, I threw a disgusted look and immediately, I found myself in the bathroom.
I peeled my clothes off that was drenched with his scent, throwing it into the hamper and jumped into the shower. The cold water was relaxing against my skin, the anger inside my subsiding as my allowed the water to consume me whole, letting its droplets roll down my body as I grabbed my scrub and liquid soap. My wolf protested against it as I started to scrub his scent off my body and replaced it with the flowery scent of my body soap. I gave a small smile as I rid of the musky scent of my pores.
Instantly, I felt myself calm down, I felt much cleaner and refreshed once I had stepped out of the shower. Although it was cold, I felt warmer and better. I smirked victoriously as I quickly changed into sweats and a black tee. I inhaled the flowery scent and walked out of my room with my head held high, only to find a furious River on the bed, eyes hooded with anger and posture tense. I rolled my eyes, he was such a firm believer inmates. After hearing our parents love story, he promised himself he would never treat his mate the way our father had done with our mother when they first met. As a kid, all he wanted to do was find his mate and love them forever, I really did not give a second thought to my mate. But, now, I guess I had to face the music.
"Oh, hello River," I drawled as I used the towel to dry my short hair. His jaw clenched and eyed me up and down before standing up slowly. His entire 6'1 height towering over my 5'7 body and glowered.
"What the hell was that?" he spat, each word coming out with an equal amount of anger as his feelings leaked into the air that it almost choked me. I shook my head, rolled my eyes and shrugged before shoving myself past him.
"I was being an Alpha," I told him sternly, asserting my position in the pack as I sat on the bed, my arms supported me as I leaned back, one eyebrow up as a challenge him to continue. He noticed this and took it, he bit his lip and he shook his head in disappointment towards me.
"You were being a jerk, I know what he means to you and I refuse to stand by watching you treat him like dirt. Didn't momma's story teach you anything? Dad even told the both of us we should never treat our mate the way he treated momma. And here you are, treating him like he's nothing," he scowled, pacing back and forth as he pointed his finger at me. My eyebrows furrowed, my wolf not liking at how he was calling us out, telling us we were doing something wrong.
"He does not mean anything, other than he is rogue that helped the death of a pack member, not only that, but he threatened the safety of our pack and he is one of them, the rogues who might start a war with us," I spat, lying to him about what that rogue meant to me. I cannot let my feelings get in the way of an upcoming attack, he is one of them, he is in direct contact with the people who hurt my pack. If I showed that rogue any remorse, his friends may use that as an advantage to kill my pack. Getting close to him wasn't an option. River gave a low growl, his eyes turning dark as his wolf peeked out from under his irises. His hormones leaked in the air, suffocating the air around me as the room went oddly quiet, the tension thick with his anger as I remained cooled and composed.
"He will one day mean everything to you Armelle, mates are meant to help each other, how could you starve your own mate? He may have threatened the safety of the pack, but he can change for you. You are only stronger with your mate, without him, you're a weak Alpha," he argued back, his hands turning into white fists. His last few words stabbed something inside of me, he knew I hated being called weak. It was a low-blow, but it impacted me more than I thought. I looked away from him, the anger resurfacing inside of me as I bit the inside of my cheek.
"You know nothing River if I get close to him, he might use that against our pack. He could wedge his way into our lives and find out how to destroy us. If I let him free, he is a threat. I cannot have that. An Alpha must sacrifice themselves for the good of the pack. That rogue is nothing more than a threat and a rogue. Until the threat is over, he will stay there, he hasn't marked me. He won't. I am strong River, if I can deny this pull, I am strong," I growled, standing up and walked over to him, my steps heavy and filled with power. My wolf surfacing behind my eyes, not liking the disrespect I was getting from my beta. River made no attempt to move, his eyes glazing with anger as my chest touched his, asserting my dominance over him. He did not shy away though, he held my menacing gaze, his fangs elongating and eyes dark.
"Denying the pull doesn't make you strong, it makes you weaker. Your wolf knows who her mate is, she recognizes who her mate is, being apart for too long without baring his mark is dangerous. It sucks your soul out of you. Your wolf's sole purpose is to care for a mate if you're away from him too long, your wolf dies. Don't you recall Uncle James when his first mate died? He almost died himself if it wasn't for Aunt Opal. You can't let yourself die because your stubbornness gets in the way of realizing what you have in front of you. Just because dad was blind, doesn't mean you have to be too," he responded back.
-
River's words left an imprint on my mind, it kept replaying in my thoughts like a broken record player, haunting my dreams and changing the way I acted around people for the next three days. I avoided the prison like the plague and tried to focus on the task ahead, preparing for any attacks. The Warriors have been training relentlessly, some regular pack members had stepped up to the task of a warrior in order to protect their loved ones. I thought of them as brave and worthy of the task and trained them as equals to the warriors. They proved to be fast learners and thanks to Uncle Jacob, helped them become greater than what they were before.
However, the rogue had also been on my mind for the past three days. Emerald had been whining about how we were treating out mate, she did not like the idea of starving him, nor did she approve of us practically rejecting him. I only shrugged and tried to move those pressing thoughts of him out of my mind. I knew that I would have to face him soon, but I rather face him later than now.
River was another problem, he avoided me just like how I avoided the prison. He spoke no words to me unless they were completely necessary, my parents were completely oblivious to the entire thing as every dinner we ate together and I could feel the tension between my brother and I. I hate to admit it, but River was right, my wolf needed that rogue, even if I didn't approve, Citrine could go weak, meaning I would too. I just haven't thought of a way to see that rogue. It frustrated me, my morals and principles went against my nature and it was tearing my mind apart. I had a pack to protect, I was the future Alpha, I could not let my pack members down. But, then there's the other side, it wanted to be closer to him and accept him. But, I couldn't. I won't.
Being a female Alpha has always been tough, the biggest problem of them all was once I found my mate, there's a big chance that the Werewolf Council will make my mate the Alpha. Females were meant to be submissive, not dominant. It was not up to me to decide whether or not I remained Alpha, it was the council and I'd be damned to allow that rogue to become Alpha. Other female Alphas had to prove themselves worthy to remain the Alpha, their mates, were either the Luna or was Alpha by the side of their mate. I was born an Alpha and I deserved to be the Alpha. This sexist hierarchy had always annoyed me, females can be strong, much stronger than men at times. Some of my female warriors had proved that.
I shook my head at the thoughts, no one was going to take my position away from me. I have Alpha blood running through my veins, the Goddess chose me to lead the pack. The Donovan family had reigned over the exact pack for hundreds of years, since the very beginning and I will not allow the blood of someone else to take over.
-
Four more days had passed and Emerald was now becoming annoying, she placed images of our mate in my mind, whining about how she missed him and she desperately craved his touch. My heart was doing the same thing, constantly aching to see him again as my mind settled on avoiding contact with him. Uncle Jacob had seemingly noticed my internal battle with myself and had actually pulled me aside to ask me what was going on. I simply brushed him off and continued to train.
It was a Friday and it was time to take a little visit to our newest prisoner. My body tingled with disgust as I entered the prison well into the night, one hour till midnight when most wolves were asleep beside the warriors. I had decided to come at this time, knowing that I'd like this conversation to be private, it was much easier to deal with wolves this way. It was better to have a one-on-one time with a prisoner, they'd easily confide if no one was going to listen. Then, only one person would have most the information, and they wouldn't have to be humiliated in front of other people.
My heart was thumping wildly as I walked up the stairs, the horrible stench of rogues filled my nostrils, but the familiar scent of caramel, apples, and cinnamon wafted into my nostrils and my stomach twisted in pleasure. My skin tingled and my body was alight with every step, my fingers trembled slightly and my wolf was howling to the moon, wanting to be closer to her mate. Images of the rogue flashed into my mind, his defined chest and supple lips invaded my mind, my stomach squeezed and my heart stammered, breath ragged and I gulped.
Stay strong Armelle, you're an Alpha, stay strong
I unlocked the door with the rusty keys, I breathed in and pushed the door open to be s./met with the delicious scent. I heard a small gasp in the room as I almost stumbled at how strong it was. It made my entire body feel like it was floating on air and my heart thumps wildly. Emerald was barking happily as I stood straight and told myself repeatedly that he had no effect on me.
Stay focused, don't let the bond get to you
I took another deep breath in and shut the door behind me, I regained my posture and focused on the power that surged through my blood. I shut Emerald off, knowing that if I did so, the bond wouldn't feel so strong.
Remember who he is, a rogue
The mantra played in my head, my nerves eased slightly and I turned my emotions off the best I could, focusing on my anger I held for him. My eyes turned cold and my anger surged through me, and my eyes snapped to him. My heart stuttered at the look of him, the warriors had done a number on him. Blotches of purple were painted on him skin, fresh bleeding cuts ran deep across his arms and torso and blood oozed out of his wrists where the silver came in contact with him. It looked almost painful as his regeneration abilities had begun to form a skin over the silver. He looked weak and fragile, I knew the more my warriors injured him, the more his hunger levels and thirst for water would grow stronger. Three weeks without food or water would kill him at this rate. My wolf called out of him sorrowfully, a wash of guilt ran through me, but I quickly covered it up with anger.
I had to be cruel, sacrifices must be made for the safety of my pack, he may be my mate, but the pack always come first.
It felt wrong to keep him there, my heart was calling out to him and the more I stared at his battered body, the more I felt the pull making me want to clean him up. I fought the urge to even approach him. I kept my posture stiff and my body alert. Even though my heart was telling me to go to him, my mind knew what he was and what he could be for my pack. I grit my teeth, fists turning white as I tried to fight my emotions.
"Are you going to talk yet?" I said, my voice unwavering and filled with emotions. I opened my eyes and looked into his chocolate brown eyes which held flames, sorrow, and tiredness. He leaned against the wall, his breathing slightly uneven as his lips twitched. His jaw was clenched as he stared at me with a scrutinizing gaze, it made me feel nervous. He looked as if he was staring directly into my soul, his gaze sent tingles down my spine and my heart alight, but I managed to not show his effect on me.
"Look rogue, you're not going to survive for long, you might as well speak now and survive, rather than die," I spat out, my anger surging forward as he continued to stay silent. It bubbled my anger more and replaced all the flurry of emotions inside of me.
"So that's how it's going to be huh? Rot away in here, no food or water? If you talk, you'll get food and water, come on rogue. I know you have a voice, don't take me as a fool rogue, there are other ways to make you talk," I growled out, taking two bold steps towards him.
Silence
I growled, extending my claws and fangs to assert my dominance over him. Something flashes behind his eyes as I neared him, trying to look menacingly as I lolled my head to the side, flashing a look of innocence and danger. A scary, yet perfect combination. I flashed him an innocent smile, knowing a new tactic to try on this rogue. If scaring and threatening him didn't work, then maybe using the bond wasn't such a bad tactic.
He tensed as I kneel in front him, a sly smile forming on my face as he continued to stare, a questioning look arose across his features as I leaned forward, only mere inches from his face like I did several days before. His eyes changed from hard to a look of uncertainty. His breath hitched slightly, mouth agape as I stared into his eyes, I faked lust through them as our proximity grew closer. Emerald was yipping happily, our closeness with our mate having an effect on my body that I had to work hard to push it back.
"Come on rogue, tell me your name," I cooed softly, my breath hitting his lips and he shuddered. His hands twitching, as if he wanted to touch me. He said nothing though, I hid my annoyance as I raised my eyebrow.
I learned a little closer, my heart skipping beats as we were barely touching. My chest skimming his and he looked almost like he was going to burst as I brushed my lips against his, sending sparks down my spine. I looked down at his lips and then up at him, my body alighting as I felt his hand almost touch my waist. The bond was pulsing between us, and I was fighting hard to reel everything back. My hands were twitching to touch him, my heart reaching out to him and lips aching to kiss him. I knew this was a bad idea, but if it got something out of him, then it'd be a victory. I knew I couldn't fight this urge for so long, but so couldn't he. I could control my emotion better than him.
I took the next step, my hand shooting up and brushed against his cheek. His body shuddered and I watched his cheeks flush, his eyes never leaving mine as I smelt his hormones in the air. He wanted me as my wolf wanted him. I smirked in victory and did something bold, my brushed past his face and my head dipped close to his ear, my lips skimming his earlobe.
"Tell me your name, baby," my voice dipped lower in seduction, I smirked as I felt him shudder, a small growl escaping his lips at the pet name, sending my nerves on fire. I felt light-headed, my lips aching to touch his skin and my hands wanting to reach out and grasp his face. I bit my lip as his breathing went uneven. I was playing with both our emotions, I was playing with fire.
I almost beamed with happiness as he uttered his name.
"Arsen Black," it was a low whisper, I didn't almost catch it, but I grinned victoriously and immediately reeled back.
He looked almost lost as I stood up and began to walk away, my eyes never leaving his and I showed him my victorious smirk. A flash of betrayal went through him, his mouth, which was agape before, turned into a vicious snarl as he realized that I had played him all this time. I shrugged innocently as his entire body went rigid and he tried to come towards me, but the chains held him back. Fury came over him as a low growl escaped his lips.
I chuckled and opened the door, watching him try to get me in a fit of anger.
"Thank you for that information, Arsen Black, next time," I said, giving him a wave before shutting the door behind me. Immediately, my body sagged against the prison door. The adrenaline wore off, leaving me with my heart stammering in my chest, cheeks red and skin crawling with flames. My breath was ragged and my wolf called out to him, all my body wanted to do was march back in there and press my body against his. I shook my head, trying to rid myself of those thoughts, but seeing him bruised up, yet flustered made my heart go in a frenzy.
My mind was telling me I should have never done that as it meant the bond would grow stronger. I could feel regret seep through me as I pushed my emotions away. But, the more I tried to do so. The more I remembered his name against my tongue, it felt so natural and pleasurable releasing his name from my mouth as I whispered it to no one.
"Arsen Black,"
A.N. I don't know what to say, really
QUESTION: what do you think will happen next?