Every night that summer just to seal my fate (oh)And I screamed for whatever it's worth"I love you, " ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?He looks up grinning like a devil
- Taylor Swift, Cruel Summers
^ Shanelle Elizabeth Bernucci ^
SUMMERS
I bit my lips to prompt myself from crying. I had no one to blame but myself. I did not have the right to cry or to console myself by saying I did not mean any of that to happen because it was not true. When I walked into that room, my mission was to do exactly what Tyler had said: have sex with Phraser. I had been so angry that I wanted to hurt him by doing it with Phraser.
One was supposed to be enough. If I had self-control and if it was purely my revenge against Ty, one sex should be enough to prove a point yet I had kept both of us busy until four in the morning.
Phraser was right. It had not been an accident. As much as I hated to admit it, I had used him to make myself feel better even if it was just for a few hours. He had the right to feel used, he had the right to feel hurt. I had been horrible to him. Not only that I had used him, but I also had harshly told him that all of that meant nothing.
Had it really meant nothing? I had no idea. I had no time to process how I felt about it or how I felt about Phraser. Just like a coward, I had thrown my words carelessly, trying to justify my own action, and in the process, I had hurt him.
Stupid. Stupid!
Deciding that I would need a drink to calm my nerves before I faced Phraser again and apologized for what I had said, I went to the hotel's bar. I ordered one glass of Merlot and told the waiter to put it on Phraser's room tab since I had stupidly forgotten to carry my wallet when I left the room.
The wine did the trick and after finishing two glasses without getting tipsy, I managed to find my courage.
I was so ready to go when I heard Luke asking him, "So is that why you broke up with Autumn?" I put my ass down and tried to duck my head as they walked past my booth and settled on the one right behind me.
"How's Elle?" asked Tyler instead of answering the question.
Luke let out a deep sigh. "She's dead drunk. How can you let her drink that much? I thought since I was not around, you would be the one to take care of her."
"Well, if you remember, I have been in NYC until today. Plus, she's not exactly five. She won't listen even if I tell her." A waitress came over to their table and they gave her their orders. It was another moment of silence as the waitress walked with their order. "So, I have never asked you this but I am asking you now." I heard a rustle which was probably Tyler shifting in his seat. "What happened between you and Elle?" Even though he made it sound like it was a normal 'how are you' question, there was no mistaking the warning in his tone.
Even Luke seemed to notice that. "Oh, damn, you are playing the big brother now. Maybe it is better to tell you after you had a couple more drinks."
"Luke."
"Alright, fine. I am sure you will know sooner or later anyway. Well, don't punch me for this but I," Luke cleared his throat twice before continuing, "had sex with your sister last summer." It seemed that Tyler did not make any alarming gesture because Luke continued with the story, "It was amazing, probably the best I've ever had and that said a lot if you know what I mean, but it was also her first."
I bit my lips to prevent myself from gasping or making any noises. I knew Shanelle was young and inexperienced, I meant, she was the principal's daughter and no one wanted to get on his bad side, but I felt bad about how the boys in school had been treating her. I was not sure Luke was the right guy for her, considering the reason he had approached her first was to help Tyler get his revenge on his father, but if he could make her happy, I did not see any reason Shanelle could not get her happy ending.
"Are you going to punch me?" asked Luke out of the blue.
Tyler was quiet for a moment before answering, "No."
"Then why are you raising your fist?" Luke muttered something inaudible before I heard him again, "Well, that fist is definitely not encouraging but let's get on with the story so we can get into yours." I saw the waitress come to their table with the drinks and the boys thanked her. She walked away with a smile on her face and I could understand why. Not all handsome guys were polite but when you found one who was both polite and handsome, it felt amazing. Almost as if you could believe in a miracle again.
"So why are you avoiding each other?" asked Tyler followed by a soft thud of his glass hitting the table.
"Yeah, so I don't remember my first but I do know that I have never been with a virgin so I kinda made a big deal about it and she didn't like it. I told her that she should've told me and I would've acted differently, I don't know, maybe make it more special and all." Luke sighed deeply then took a drink. I could hear him gulping down the liquor. "She said it's no big deal and she also said that she regretted doing it with me because I made a big deal out of it. That got me angry so I said maybe she should have thought about it before she started kissing me and got her hand down my pants. Then she called me a dick." Luke seemed to jump to his feet and the next thing I heard was, "Okay, now I know you definitely want to punch me."
Tyler grunted. "Try to be in my shoes, man. If she's your sister, what would you do after hearing all of this?"
"Well, it would be inappropriate of me to think of my sister the way I think of Shanelle," Luke started mumbling. "I am pretty sure I'd be in jail if I have an incestuous relationship with my sister."
"Luke," warned Ty again.
"But yeah, I get why you're mad. I'm sorry." I heard him settling down in his seat again. "So, what about you and Autumn? Are you seriously going to let this Italian mafia ruin your relationship with her?"
I straightened my back and then leaned back in my seat, trying my best to pay double attention to what they were going to talk about. I knew it was wrong to overhear people's conversation but what Luke had said intrigued the hell out of me. My breakup with Tyler was not easy but it was not clear either. He had simply left without so much explanation. If by overhearing their conversation, I got to figure out the real reason he had left, then so be it.
Tyler sighed. "I have no other choice."
"Yes, you do," argued Luke. "Didn't you tell me it works out for that Mario guy and your ex?"
"That's because Faith is stubborn to the point of absurdity."
Luke chuckled. "And you don't think Autumn is stubborn too? Hell, she went through a lesbian psychopath in high school and nearly died because of detergent and still dated you back then although breaking up with you could save her some trouble. If you ask me, I would say she is a fighter and stubborn as hell."
"The situation is different, Luke." I heard Ty sigh frustratedly then slammed his glass on the table so hard I wondered if it broke. "Even Mario did not want Faith to know any of this. It was an accident, she overheard it and there was no way she would leave us alone unless we spill all the beans."
"Then why didn't you and Mario talk when she was around or within earshot?" Luke seemed to be as frustrated but for a different reason. He did not seem to think what Tyler had done was right and I agreed with him. Not telling me what the hell was going on and keeping me in the dark was never a good solution. "Or even better, just tell her the truth and work things out with her. Let her make a choice whether to stay or leave."
If I was sitting next to him and not behind him, I would have hugged Luke and thanked him for saying all of this.
"Have you been listening to me this whole time?" Tyler's voice was rising. "I am trying to protect her. She is better without all of this."
"Oh, and are you sure that is your choice?" Luke took another drink and when he finally finished it off, he added, "damn, Ty, I have never thought of you as a 'noblid'."
The curiosity won as Ty muttered, "What the fuck is 'noblid'?"
Luke clicked his tongue. "Noble but stupid. Don't you remember what I told you ages ago at that party when you stupidly stuck your tongue down some weird girl's throat?"
I could not hear Ty's response but I bet it was a set of curse words towards his buddy.
"Well, let me remind you, bud." Luke shifted in his seat. "There are many fishes in the ocean but only one is more special than others and when you are lucky enough to find the one, never let her go."
Tyler groaned. "Are you seriously lecturing me now after what you did to Shanelle?"
"Well, yes. Because at least I ain't stupid enough to let her go, in fact, I am trying my best to get her back. It is something that you should be doing if your brain were not so far up your ass."
© All Rights Reserved 2018 Rosen
a/n: HAPPY LUNAR YEAR!! For those who celebrated ♥ I have accidentally used scissors and wore a black shirt (which can be considered as a bad omen) but I hope this year will full of opportunities and blessings ♥ how are you, my angels? I feel that the more we are heading towards the end of the book, the more I want to make it longer (I hate finishing a book, you see hahahaha) XD
also, I know not everyone likes the last chapter. Well, hate the character, not the book lol none of the characters in this book is perfect, everyone has their own flaws, makes stupid decisions and all that. I know I cannot please everyone, when I mapped out this book like four months ago, I know some will hate the ending and some will like it. At this point, I will not change how the ending of this book will be. I will simply write according to the original plan and can only hope you'll (respect this and) enjoy the book nonetheless. Thank you! Agi x
p.s. SUMMERS is published in my less crowded account austenative
you can check it out if you want (: