Kinda projected in this chapter... my bad 💀
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I woke up the next morning with dry tears still streaked down my face. I sighed dramatically and made my way into the bathroom. I quickly changed before anybody else could come in, but I likely knew they wouldn't as I always woke up before anybody else. I washed my face, freeing myself of the memories of last night. I swiftly styled my hair and left the Common Room. I made my way to the Great Hall and smiled peacefully when I noticed it was only me, Hagrid, Minerva, Lupin and Dumbledore. They all greeted me, and Minerva motioned for me to come to her. I sat my stuff down at the end of the Slytherin table where I normally sat, and walked over toward her.
She leaned in close to my ear so nobody else could hear. "Y/N, dear.. I heard of what happened last night." I quickly widened my eyes and backed up. He told her?! She stared at me confusingly. "You got detention, right?" I released a puff of air when I realized she wasn't referring to what had happened IN detention. I nodded and she looked at me sympathetically. It really was my fault for getting detention though, I mean, I was in the restricted section. I wouldn't tell her that, though. I smiled back and heard a door open to the left of us. I looked over and immediately lost my breath as I saw Severus walk in. He was slumped over himself and looked as horrible as he did just days ago. He hadn't slept, his hair was messy and he was falling over.
Was he drunk?!
I accidentally opened my mind when I said that, causing him to look in my direction. I quickly turned away and looked back at Minerva. "Um... I'll go sit now, Minerva." She nodded, smiling kindly at me. "Enjoy your breakfast, dear." I smiled back and left the table, walking back over to my seat. I heard a voice in my head and knew who it was almost instantly.
I'm sorry.
I huffed angrily and threw my book onto the table loudly. He knew I was mad. I sat down and shortly after the other teachers and students began to arrive. I could hear Severus and Dumbledore arguing from the back of the room and I'm sure everybody else could as well. I looked at Minerva curiously and she shrugged back at me. She then looked over and yelled at the two of them to be quiet. They shut up immediately and I giggled. She always knew how to calm anybody down. Albus stood up, not moving from his seat. "Let the feast... begin!" He snapped and the tables suddenly filled with food. Everybody began eating and I picked at my breakfast, wondering where Draco was. I got an inkling and looked over, noticing I was correct. He was sitting with Amelia and Luna.
I smiled sadly but didn't bring anymore attention to it. I didn't want to seem possessive of the friendship but I couldn't help but blame myself anyway. I had been keeping my distance from my friends recently, and I was beginning to feel the consequences for it.
I took a bite out of some ham and then sat the rest back on the plate. I really didn't have much of an appetite today. I then thought back to what I heard earlier and decided to call him out on it.
How dare you say you're sorry?
I watched him as he looked over at me with his eyebrows raised. I continued,
You hurt me, over and over again. Several days in a row and all you have to say is that you're sorry? Your apology doesn't mean shit to me.
I glared at him as he looked back at me sadly. He definitely was drunk.
Are you drunk right now? I cannot even believe you. You're only apologizing because you feel the effects of the alcohol. You aren't really sorry.
I was on a roll, I might as well get everything out while he was drunk and probably wouldn't remember it. He was now staring at me intensely and I could feel a few more eyes on me but I didn't care. Even if somebody saw they would just assume we were having an angry stare down.
You allow me to care for you when you're sick, you give me your clothes to wear and even cooked me meals to eat. Then what? You turn around and basically tell me I mean nothing to you just because of your dead girlfriend.
His face slowly changed to hurt and a tint of anger. I wasn't going to let him stop me.
You have a lot of nerve to tell me you're sorry after you purposefully called this off. Don't you ever apologize for something you aren't truly upset over doing.
I finally finished and watched him, waiting for him to reply, but he never did. Eventually he looked back over at Dumbledore who was now handing him a water. He must really be drunk..
He drank it quietly as I stayed watching him. Suddenly I felt something hit me in the head and I glared at the person who threw it. Draco. He smirked at me and pointed toward Snape, raising his eyebrows in victory. I grimaced at him and raised my fist as if threatening to beat him up. He laughed and turned back to his table. I really did miss my friends.
After breakfast was over I was walking back to my dorm to get my stuff for my first class. I had potions first today, but I'm sure Dumbledore wouldn't allow Severus to teach in his condition.
Turns out I was right. When I entered the classroom I noticed Snape was sitting at his desk while Dumbledore stood in front of him. He still looked drunk, but not as much as before he drank the water. Must be helping.
"Good morning, students. I will be filling in for your potions class today, as your professor isn't..." he turned around and glanced at Severus before turning back to us. "...feeling the best." Many students giggled, knowing he was drunk. Snape glared at the students and they immediately shut up. Dumbledore began the lesson as I fiddled with my notebook, listening to him speak about a potion we had already learned last year. Nobody had it in them to correct him, so we just let it go.
Next I had transfiguration with Minerva. The class went pretty well. We ended up turning our books into cups of Butterbeer, and Ron turned his into a bowl of water. Everybody giggled at him and he looked at Minerva nervously. She raised her eyebrow at him, dismissing his broken wand. "Ron, perhaps you might invest in a new wand. This one seems to be a bit... damaged." I held in my laughter as the boy nodded, turning bright red from embarrassment.
We had lunch after. This time Draco, Amelia, Luna, Harry, Ron and I all sat together. Hermione didn't show up to lunch for some reason, not that I cared.
My third class of the day was Muggle Studies. The class went by pretty fast. It was one of my favorite classes, as muggles particularly interested me. Everything from the stuff they eat, to the stuff they listen to for music. Sometimes I like to indulge in Muggle music. I specifically like the piano and classical tunes.
Lastly, I had D.A.T.D.A. with Professor Lupin. He was always very kind to me. I didn't mind him, but I disliked the class. It wasn't really my speed as I was more of a laid-back type of learner. I didn't enjoy speaking about Werewolves and Death Eaters that roamed the wizarding world and threatened our very existence.
I was making my way to dinner from class, when I was stopped by Luna. She seemed very frantic and asked me to follow her quickly. I furrowed my eyebrows as I jogged off after her. She was a fast runner. I could barely keep up. We made it to the dungeons before I realized where she was taking me. I immediately knew there was something wrong with Severus. I'm not sure why she would bring me, and not the nurse or Dumbledore, but I ran after her anyway.
We finally made it to his classroom door and she stopped right in front of it. She bent over to catch her breath before speaking quietly to me. "Phew.. I was told to send you in here, somebody said there's something wrong and he asked for you directly. I found it weird.. but it's not my business. Anyways, you better get in there!" I nodded and she ran off in the other direction.
I mentally prepared myself before I entered. I stopped with my hand on the handle to catch my breath. I sighed and finally opened the door. Hoping it wasn't anything too serious. I noticed Minerva was inside and Severus was nowhere to be found. I furrowed my eyebrows and looked at her curiously. She gave me a pitiful smile back and began speaking slowly. "Hello, dear. I'm afraid I don't have the best news. He has caught a bad health day... again. I wouldn't have bothered you, but I figured you'd want to know." I nodded slowly, taking everything in.
"Oh, he is in his chambers. If you don't know where that is, I'd be glad to show you." I smiled, "I know where it is, thank you, Minerva." She grinned back at me and held her hand out to stop me from moving just yet. "Also, please take good care of him. I know you are not on the best terms right now... but you must care for him." I raised my eyebrows, not knowing how she came to the conclusion we weren't on good terms. I hadn't told her anything, and I'm sure Snape wouldn't have either. I brushed it off for now and thanked her. I left the room and walked at a fast pace down the hallway. I looked toward the Slytherin Common Room, making sure nobody was watching. They must all be at dinner already.
I turned the knob and let myself in. If he was truly as sick as he was last time, I wasn't going to make him get up. I closed the door behind me and walked further into the room. I didn't notice him at first, until I heard a deep groan come from the bedroom. I looked over to my right and noticed him hanging half off the bed, laying on his stomach. He looked incredibly pale, more than usual, and had his hair hanging over his face. I smiled sadly and walked over to him. He didn't notice me standing there.
I wondered if he had actually asked for me, or if Minerva had just had Luna get me herself.
"Severus..?" He slowly turned his head to look at me, he looked horribly sick.. I almost forgave him. Almost.
He smiled at me and tried to roll over, failing to do so and flopping right back onto his stomach. I sat my stuff down on the end of the bed and walked closer to him. I hesitated, not wanting to touch him incase he was still uncomfortable with it. But I did it anyways, noting that he was too sick to argue. I rested my hand on his back and kneeled down in front of him. "Sev... what happened? You were doing so well.." He looked at me with a look of pain and smiled as softly as he could. One part of me felt bad for him.
I looked him over, he was wearing a light grey t-shirt, and black and white plaid pajama pants. I smiled softly at how cute he looked, but shook it off quickly. I am still upset with him, despite what he's going through. I took my hand off his back and he huffed gently. I put one hand on his chest and the other on his arm, helping him to sit up. He grunted as he leaned back against his headboard. He closed his eyes tightly and I looked at him sadly.
"I t-thin-" I cut him off, stopping him from using his sore throat to speak. "Don't, it's fine." He nodded cautiously and kept his eyes closed. I walked over to his potions closet and looked around for anything that could at least calm the issues down for now. I found a pepper-up potion and brought it over to him. He drank it slowly as he looked at me.
A few minutes later he began to feel the symptoms subside as I sat next to him on his bed. I was sitting stiffly with my arms crossed, not wanting to be as awkward as possible, but failing miserably.
He finally got the strength to sit up next to me. He put his hands in his lap and I saw something on his arm. I furrowed my eyebrows just as he hid it between his legs. He stared at me with no emotion and I sighed, figuring we were back to how it was yesterday. That was, until he placed his arm onto my lower thigh. I froze and looked straight ahead with my eyes closed. I knew he couldn't speak. So he did the best thing he could.
I truly am sorry. I did have intentions of hurting you and I can only admit that they were selfish intentions.. however.. I really am undoubtedly sorry for my actions.
I ignored him and stood up, causing his hand to fall onto the bed below me.