"Anyone got any One Piece fanfic recs 😃 i feel like i read every Buggy x Reader to exist—"
—Author-kun
"Sorta been thinking about getting a new fic cover— current kinda cringe"
—Author-san
Mid-key filler
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"I'M TELLING YOU!" Inosuke yelled, making dramatic arm movements. "THERE'S A DEMON AT MY PLACE!"
"OUR PLACE" I bonked his head.
"DON'T HIT ME!"
We were currently on the roof of a building, discussing how our jobs as super secret spies are going. Since it was midday, the streets were pretty empty.
Hence, Inosuke can yell. To an extent.
I ignored him though. "I think the demon's a woman. When i attacked her, there were parts of Obi stuck onto my vines. I wonder if she's hot..."
"What did you do with it?" Tanjiro asked, ignoring my last sentence.
"I disposed it, i guess. You never know, she might be able to track that shit."
"That's a smart move." Uzui said.
"Since when were you there?!" Insouke pointed at him, pausing in impersonation of what the demon 'felt' like. "FRUIT NINJA OF FESTIVITIES!"
"WHERE DID 'FRUIT' COME FROM?"
"Did you just praise me?" I asked(though it fell to deaf ears), then I turned to Tanjiro. "He's in love with me for real, for real."
"Aaaaand, i will never praise you ever again."
I punched a wall.
"Well, uh, you received my letter, right?" I said, while tanjiro began to scold me for damaging other's property.
"You mean THIS???" Uzui held out a piece of paper for the country to see.
for the illiterate ppl 🙄 i wrote it down again
"Wassup Skittle Circus
'Tis the alpha writing
I presume that boar man and i have received(recieved?) some info on ya galway gorl.
No one in this house knows why she isn't leaving her room.
Shocker, am i right
Also, please send Inosuke to "wearing clothes" therapy. It would benefit society very much.
U never know, wifi might b invented cause ppl dont otta worry abt public nudity.
FYI: ever since you claimed the title of "hottest bitch" i have been digging your grave.
From: the hottest bitch"
(Writing is rushed at the end due to Insouke's neediness for action)
I read through the contents, twice.
"Yes??? Its an amazing letter?????"
Tanjiro sweatdropped. "W-well, maybe you could've written a bit more on the information, like, if she's receiving food and—"
"OBVIOUSLY I'M THE HOTTEST BITCH?!" Tengen yelled, slapping the 'FYI' repeatedly
"THATS WHAT YOU'RE UPSET ABOUT?" Tanjiro cried.
"ACTUALLY, I CLAIMED THE TITLE FIRST"
"YEAH IN THE FUTURE, THEREFORE I AM THE O.G."
"IM GOING TO JUMP TO THE PAST AGAIN TO HAVE YOU ABORTED"
"PUSSY MOVE"
"BITCH—"
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"Zenitsu still hasn't come." I said, looking around.
"No shit sherlock." Uzui picked his nose.
I prepared myself to make some high-stain green hair dye.
"Uzui-san," Tanjiro faced him, which stopped me from continuing my plan. "What did I say about respect?"
"Fine, fine." He rolled his eyes, but the playfulness what momentary.
"I believe that Zenitsu might've been caught by the demon."
"What."
"YOU SHOULD'VE SAID THAT FIRST???"
Uzui stood up, ignoring my words. "I wanted to help my wives, but got you four into trouble as well."
"Are you saying we should leave?" Tanjiro asked, though he looked completely opposed to the idea.
"Yes. If there's an upper rank demon here, you definitely cannot handle it. From now on, i'll operate on my own. You three must leave hanamachi immediately— don't squander this chance!"
"Wait!" Tanjiro yelled, but Uzui already vanished into thin air.
I faced Inosuke. "I got a plan. We don't listen to what he says."
"I was planning to do that anyway!"
Tanjiro sighed. "Well, I think he just doesn't trust us cause we're in the lowest rank."
"No, we went up?" Insouke gave him a look, and clenched his fist. A "kanoe" kanji appeared on the back of his hand in a purplish hue.
Tanjiro turned to stone, and I deadpanned. "How did you know that, and I didn't?!"
"I'm just insanely cracked my g"
Tanjiro snapped out of his confusion.
"When—?" He looked at his hand, doing the same.
"The tickled your hand on that shitty mountain, didn't they?" Insouke questioned.
"They did?" I scrunched my brows, "Well, i guess i don't even remember what i ate this morning, so—"
"I remember what I ate! It was chicken!" Inosuke interrupted.
"It was cooked, right?" Tanjiro asked, constantly suspicious of Inosuke's eating habits.
Inosuke only beamed.
Tanjiro's suspicions are valid, honestly.
"IT WAS COOKED, RIGHT?"
"This isn't the time to discover our inner Gordon Ramsey ya'll!" I exclaimed, pushing the two apart.
"Cauldron Ram— the hell is that?!"
"Point is, we need a plan!" I hissed. "I hate Uzui, but i know that Upper moons are strong as hell— remember Mt. Natagumo?! That was a lower moon and it's disciples!"
"Holy shit she's being serious for once." Tanjiro whispered to Inosuke.
"I'M ALWAYS SERIOUS! NOW GET STARTED THINKING OF A PLAN!"
"Why can't we just run at my— our place?" Inosuke grumbled. "Attack the demon and get it over with."
"We don't know which building they're in!" Tanjiro said. "There must be some sort of pathways..."
"Then we can burn the district down!"
"Woah, good idea!" I said.
"We can't do that! There's innocent people and there would be casualties!"
"But i'm hungry." Inosuke yawned.
"And I wanna kill myself." I said, breakdancing.
"NO"
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In the end, we decided to meet at House Ogimoto, since Tanjiro hasn't finished investigating his house. We(not Inosuke) also deciphered that the demon must be disguised as a worker.
"I think..." Tanjiro said, "that Zenitsu and Uzui's wives are still alive. So, i want to rescue them. And i definitely don't want you two to die! So be careful, okay?"
I 'awww'-ed.
"Come here Wantannnn," I cried, giving him a bone-crushing hug, which he returned(with less violence).
"I was planning to say the same thing!" Inosuke grinned. "You better not did either!"
I looked at him like he was prey, then pounced. "COME HERE YOUUU— I should just kidnap you both at this point—"
Inosuke wrestled me throughout our hug.
I then stood up. "Operation: Don't Die, commence!"
I grabbed Inosuke by the collar and waved to Tanjiro. "Bye! See ya tonight!"
"Goodbye, (Y/N), Inosuke!"
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I love him
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Currently, I have beaten Inosuke 12 times in go fish, 42 times in rock paper scissors, 8 times in poker and 2 times in "Daruma-san ga Koronda".
Inosuke has won 7 times in go fish, 42 tomes in rock paper scissors, once in poker a d 5 times in Daruma-san ga Koronda.
We eventually got bored of the games and ended up lazying around in our room.
"Tanjiro isn't here yet..." I whined, rolling around the floor like a log. "And its already past nightfall—"
Inosuke sat up, and blew a fuse.
"That's it! I'm heading out!"
He leapt into the roof.
Into the roof.
"Oi! Mice! Get me my swords!" He yelled in the roof.
"Mine too," I yawned, raising my hand from the floor.
He hopped down with our stuff, which the muscle mice graciously brought.
"Wake up already!" He slapped my hand, "We're gonna go fight!"
I snored.
"dON'T FALL ASLEEP—!" He ripped his clothes off out of frustration.
I snapped out of my sleep. "BITCH DONT FIGHT ME NAKED—"
"THE LORD OF THE MOUNTAINS DOES WHATEVER HE WA—"
I threw his demon slayer clothes at him.
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Ig we heading to the third 'horribly-written-by-me' war in this fic! 😃
I hope ya'll dont hold high hopes for my writing skills🤞
LOOK HOW CUTE THEY AREEEE 😭