.
{Making Headway}
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Word Count; 5,775
Costa thought it was odd that Aizawa had cancelled training lessons two days in a row, only to ask her to meet him in his classroom before school on Thursday-- which was only a week and one day away from the NWHC.
The competition loomed over Costa and she felt as if she were dragging her weight, forcing herself to pick back up her discarded regimen. There'd been some improvement within the past few days she'd been back to her running routine, which she'd requested to do on her own until she felt fit enough to have Katsuki beside her.
But one thing hadn't changed. The new thing inside of her wouldn't fucking change.
She'd woken at six in the morning and was already stepping into the classroom within an hour, waltzing in sluggishly and throwing her bag down on a random seat. Aizawa snapped out of his nap. He rubbed his eyes, sitting up from where he was hunched over his desk. She stood in front of him with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Why did you ask me here so early?" She rose an eyebrow at him and he took a few moments to stretch and yawn, waking himself back up. Then, he cleared his throat, switching back into teacher mode. His answers were as short as they always were. "To discuss a few things."
"Such as?" Costa kicked back a chair so that she could slump into it, crossing one leg over the other. She'd done her hair back into two, tight cascading dutch braids that connected into one curly ponytail down her neck.
Aizawa ran a hand through his hair, grabbing the mouse of his computer to pull something up on his screen. It was silent between them for several long moments, the only sound being the click of his mouse. Costa let out a yawn, resting an elbow on the desk to prop her face in the center of her palm.
She yawned again, getting comfortable.
Aizawa's voice startled her out of her brief dozing. "I've come up with a few options for you, given your training isn't going so well." She scoffed at him, lifting her head up to narrow her eyes. "You said it would take ti-"
"But if you can't control it, there's no use having it. It's only making your body weaker." Aizawa interrupted her, sending her a knowing look. She let out a frustrated sigh, shaking her head in disbelief.
"What are you saying? You want to turn me into the government now?" She bit back, angrily curling her fingers into the fabric of her jacket. He let out a long, impatient sigh as if she were simply misunderstanding him. She watched as he placed his fingers on the desk and stood. Then his narrowed eyes focused on her.
"I am saying that I want you to have options should things go awry." Aizawa explained and her knee began to bob. He pinched the bridge of his nose, pressing his fingertips into the corners of his eyes. Aizawa groaned, "The day has not even begun and your attitude is already giving me a headache, problem child."
Costa pursed her lips and crossed her arms over her chest, the epitome of sass and reluctance. It made him shake his head. In that second, he wondered why he'd chosen to invite such a troublesome teenager into his class, as well as how much easier his life would've been without her. But despite any of that, she'd proven time and time again that she was worth whatever trouble she brought to his table.
"I want you to know that if you change your mind- if you don't want this quirk at all- there are ways in which we can attempt to remove it." He explained carefully. His tongue rolled each word out like flattening a piece of paper across a countertop, where the words were printed smack right in front of her eyes. She shut her mouth, her features pulling into a look of confusion. "What? What do you mean?"
"You've never met Eri, have you?" He asked, crossing his arms, his eyebrows furrowed.
Costa blinked at the familiar name. Eri? Eri. Oh, Eri.
Eri was the child Midoriya and Kirishima had once been sent on a mission to rescue. Costa had seen pictures of her at their Christmas party the year before. She had a little horn on the front of her forehead, and she was ridiculously adorable.
"No, not personally. I've only really been here for a few months." Costa shrugged her shoulders, remembering there were some things she was wasn't a part of here. Sometimes it was easy to forget her entire class experienced a completely different first year than her. She knew of things from the stories they loved to tell her. She listened to each one and laughed when they laughed, cringed when they cringed, smiled when they smiled. But it wasn't the same, given she hadn't even been there to witness any of it.
She didn't like to admit it, but sometimes it made her sad.
"Well, if you didn't know already- Eri has the ability to rewind the state of one's body. That means she could rewind yours a bit, back to just before you were implemented with that quirk." Aizawa tried to explain and Costa's eyes widened as she nearly fell out of her seat.
Her words were quick, stunned, questioning. "But would it work? Would that mean the quirk would just- poof- disappear right out of my body?"
"I can't guarantee it'll work. I have a few other ideas as well, but maybe this will allow us to get the parasite out before it fully takes root inside your body." Aizawa came around the desk so that he could lean against the front of it. Costa squirmed where she sat, now alert and engaged in the conversation considering the possibility of the topic at hand.
"It's not set in stone, but it's something to think about." Aizawa said, pressing his lips together. "I don't want you to have to be treated like a weapon, by anyone, not today or any day. If you decide to let it be, then fine, you have my full support, protection, and guidance. It just might be a little easier on you, given everything that's happened, if you didn't have to suffer the weight of it all the time."
"Do I seem like someone who's ever chosen the easy way out?" Costa scoffed, smirking. But Aizawa only stared back at her knowingly, not believing any bullshit half-ass response that'd come out of her mouth. Her smirk slowly faded and her expression turned less cocky, and more worried.
It was something, like he said, and yet a part of her felt as if he were asking her to surrender, to lay down her weapons and stop fighting. Perhaps she'd just grown accustomed to fighting, her life had always consisted of constant uphill climbs. Maybe it wasn't that she didn't want to stop, but because she simply couldn't.
"You aren't weak for choosing the easy way out." Aizawa said so plainly, as if it were a simple decision, a simple crack in the concrete. Costa swallowed hard, swallowing her pride as Aizawa gave her that look. I know you hate this thing, I know the reason you can't use it is because you don't want to.
She let out a huff of a laugh, "Am I that predictable?"
"I think you just need to catch a break." Aizawa said, no accusation in his tone, his shoulders bobbing in a nonchalant shrug, "No shame in that."
"But you don't seem to understand the level of expectation I set for myself." Costa leant forward, resting her elbows on the desk arrogantly. "Refusing another quirk I could potentially control? That's an opportunity right there."
"And yet you cringe every time you even try to use it." Aizawa answered for her, slapping her in the face with the cherry on top of the mother-fucking truth ice cream sundae. She squeezed the lip of the desk, her irritation beginning to itch under her skin. She needed to get out of this room, out of this conversation.
"I'm not saying quit. Just- you don't have to make it an obstacle for yourself in the first place."
"I know, but that doesn't make it sound any less like quitting." Costa's eyes narrowed into slits. "Perhaps this is only you using reverse-psychology to make me cooperate."
"You're too smart for that." Aizawa said, sending her the same narrowed look that made her crack a half-smile. He did a poor job of suppressing a chuckle when she nodded dramatically and replied, "Damn right I am."
"Is this you saying no then?" Aizawa pushed himself off the desk, glancing down at his wrist watch. Costa saw his eyes widen before they quickly flitted toward the door, expecting students to begin filing through. Costa took this as her cue to mosy on over to her own desk, plopping down into the seat obnoxiously.
"No." She answered, sighing as she sat back in the comfort of her own chair. "I'll have to think on it."
"Okay." He said slowly, "But while you think on it, I've got an idea for training this afternoon."
Costa walked out onto the PE grounds after the bell had rung, signaling the ending of a school day. She'd just changed out of her costume for Hero Training Class and Costa was wearing a matching black runner's set and supportive sneakers. She reached up and tightened her pony tail.
Aizawa having mentioned that he had an "idea" for this afternoon caused several discerning scenarios to filter into Costa's mind, including: threats of expulsion, possible near-death situations, and lots of red-eye glaring. She'd made sure to physically and mentally prepare herself for all of it.
She held her hand over her eyes, squinting as she whipped around, searching for Aizawa or any sign of his "idea", but there was nothing. So, she decided to warm up and do some stretches. She stretched for ten minutes, incorporating different yoga-style poses into the warm up to get a more well-rounded stretch going. But once ten minutes had turned into fifteen, Costa started to think she got the location of their training all wrong.
She'd just gotten back to her feet, going to follow her steps back through the school when she spotted the three figures exiting the building Costa halted, covering her hands over her eyes once again to spot them. Costa's eyes lit in recognition and she let out a nervous laugh as they neared. "Hey..."
Todoroki and Tokoyami stood on either side of Aizawa, appearing just as confused as she felt. They all stood in front of her with their hands in their pockets and it was silent for three whole beats until Costa finally asked the obvious, "What are you guys doing here?"
They shared puzzled glances as Aizawa clasped his hands together, drawing their attention. "I've realized every training session you and I have had has been isolated, since it technically has to be. But learning about your own abilities is as much about collaboration as anything else, so I thought you could use some... peer feedback."
Costa's lips parted as she realized who was standing in front of her. Tokoyami, who also has a darkness quirk, and Todoroki, who has mastered not one but two opposing quirks. She turned to Aizawa with a raised brow. He thought she needed help, advice, a push. That small part of her that was stubborn and proud wanted to roll her eyes, but she inhaled sharply and nodded anyway. "Okay..."
"I've filled them in on how far you've gotten, as well as how far you have not gotten." Aizawa stated, earning a glare from Costa.
"But what about our... confidentiality agreement?" Costa suddenly remembered the conversation they'd had in Nezu's office just the other week. "Aren't we not supposed to involve other students?"
Aizawa huffed out a hint of a laugh, shaking his head at her, "I can assure you that your classmates catch on to more than you think, this would only confirm assumptions. Plus, I'm here to overlook your session. If something goes wrong, I'll can simply cancel your quirk. No one gets hurt."
"You and I have similar abilities then." Tokoyami spoke up, his voice a deep rumble in comparison to the high-pitch whistle of the wind. Costa pushed the front pieces of her hair out of her face, sticking them behind her ears. "Now we do. Yes, I guess... I just don't know how to even begin to use it."
"A darkness's quirk?" Todoroki asked, curiosity and mild bewilderment prevalent in his pretty-boy features. "But how-?"
"That's irrelevant." Aizawa cut him off, saving her the trouble of explaining. She didn't bother to send Aizawa a grateful look, only turning to Todoroki and hesitantly replying, "It's a long story."
"I understand." Todoroki nodded once, catching the hint that she wasn't allowed to say. Then his eyes wandered to her hair and the corner of his lips twitched with a smile, his eyes glinting in wonder. "It suits you. The hair."
"Thanks, I guess we're twinning now, aren't we?" She touched that piece of her hair and chuckled awkwardly. He only smiled, features softening the longer he looked at her. The tension in the air thickened as he wouldn't tear his eyes away. "Sure."
Aizawa rolled his eyes, drawing the attention back to himself. "The purpose of today is to make some progress understanding this quirk a little better. At the beginning of learning how to use your quirk, what was the first thing you learned?"
The question was for all three of them but Todoroki and Tokoyami only looked up expectantly at Costa, for her to answer the question. She licked her lips, shrugging a shoulder, "Learn how it feels when it's triggered."
"Right, does it feel fast or slow, warm or cold, soothing or startling?" Aizawa said, the three of them now forming a semi-circle around him as he spoke. He had this furrowing look in his eyes and Costa caught on that he knew exactly what he was talking about. The three of them listened attentively. "Knowing how to summon your quirk is like muscle memory now that you've evolved, so it's easy to forgot the difficulties of first figuring it out. Let's start there then."
"So this is like preschool quirk training 101?" Costa deadpanned. Aizawa nodded, already walking in the opposite direction and waving at them to follow. Todoroki, Tokoyami, and Costa fell into step behind Aizawa, like little ducklings following their mother in a line as he continued his lecture, "Think about what your own quirk feels like. Try to envision how the opposite of it feels. Todoroki- how does your fire feel compared to your ice?"
"Wild, a bit flowing- like a growing sensation inside, and I feel warm in the chest." Todoroki says, pressing a hand against his sternum. "But my ice is sharp, and cold of course. It feels like balling up my fists or clenching my jaw. There's more tension and strain."
"And Tokoyami?" Aizawa raised a brow, looking back over his shoulder at the three of them briefly. "What does Dark Shadow feel like?"
Costa turned toward him, suddenly very curious to the answer of this question. Tokoyami cleared his throat, adjusting the collar of his shirt. "It's another being that exists within me. He's wild and unpredictable and yet he can be gentle and loving sometimes. He's a being that only wishes to be a part of me."
Costa tensed up as a vision of It popped inside her head, distorted and angry and suffering. She shivered just thinking about It, who she hasn't seen in days now that she's sleeping again.
"He fluctuates with my mood as well. He's a reflection of me, clothed in shadow." Tokoyami explained and Costa held her breath, leaning forward with each word, each incredibly similar description. "But it feels more like calling on a friend than anything else."
Calling on a friend. That wasn't helpful, given It was not a friend.
"What does yours feel like, Miriara?" He suddenly turned to her, which caused Todoroki to look back at her too. She opened and then closed her mouth, unsure how to respond. How do you soften the answer: It feels like I'm being suffocated by my own hands, sinking into the depths of my own mind?
"Intense. Perhaps, um... unsettling." She settled with, clearing her throat and looking away. The whole thing was already uncomfortable and Aizawa hadn't even managed to explain what they were doing quite yet. That was until Aizawa led them behind the very back of the school, in a woody area, where a rickety old trailer sat.
They stopped in front of it and Costa crossed her arms over her chest, blowing out a long breath. Aizawa placed his hands on his hips and turned around to face them. "Well we're going to try to trigger it, using your classmates guidance and the element that most associates with it."
He opened the white wooden door, causing a creaky noise to fill the air, and Costa looked into complete and utter darkness of the trailer. She swallowed, glancing up at Aizawa as his lips parted into a creepy smile. "You're not scared of the dark, are you?"
"Please, it'll take more than that to knock me down." Costa scoffed, walking past him and into the trailer as he held the door open. Tokoyami followed after her, unfazed by the dark as Dark Shadow shook with excitement. Thankfully, Tokoyami had managed to get a better handle on his quirk within the past year, and Aizawa trusted him to keep his quirk in control throughout this whole session. If worst came to worse, he'd use his quirk on all of them.
When Todoroki went to follow them, Aizawa put a hand up, drawing the boy's gaze to his, "We observe for now. If we need light, you'll be our flame, okay?" He said and Todoroki nodded once in understanding.
The two of them shuffled into the trailer and leaned against the wall as Costa blindly walked further into the trailer on cautious feet. She blew out a shaky breath, the all consuming darkness giving her flashbacks to when It took over. A crawling feeling suddenly skittered down her spine, causing her to whip her head around, hands flying up to hold her arms.
"You okay?" Tokoyami asked, his voice drawing her attention back to the people in the room. She nodded, then realized they couldn't see her, and cleared her throat. "Yeah, I'm fine."
"First, I want you to take yourself back to the moment you first used it." Aizawa spoke out into the abyss of the room, causing Costa to inhale sharply, even nervously. She forced her eyes to close, as she loosened her shoulders.
The place she was being asked to slip into beckoned her, whispered her name inside her ears and she scrunched her nose, grimacing at the sickening sensation. Then, Aizawa asked, "Tokoyami, in what way do you call to Dark Shadow? What way did you, originally?"
Tokoyami pondered over the question before stating, "At first, Dark Shadow was a foreign creature I had to coax into form. Now, he is a friend I simply have to call upon."
His voice turned to her. "Miriara, do you think you can coax your parasite into a form?"
"No, not in the same way," Costa shook her head, the temperature in the room suddenly dropping into an icy atmosphere. "It's wild, flowing, inconsolable."
"Well we're gonna change that, you have no choice but to make it consolable."
"Right, make it consolable... so easy..." She responded sarcastically.
It was silent as Costa inhaled and exhaled, trying to dig deep, down down down into herself. Memories flashed through her mind; Katsuki's face when she was bleeding out, her father pressed up against the wall as she attacked him, It with its hands wrapped around her throat, the cool inky blackness of falling endlessly into the abyss.
"Don't fear it. Fear will pull you out, it will allow it to have power over you. Just... call on it." Aizawa's voice moved around the room, as if he were circling her and Tokoyami as they stood there, across from one another. Tokoyami stayed silent, with Dark Shadow at his side, ready to shield him should it come to that.
But Costa only breathed, pulling her consciousness back into the abyss, back into the cold and dark that slithered around inside of her. She let her head lean back as her eyes began moving under their lids.
"Can you feel it, Miriara?" Aizawa asked after a long pause of quiet.
She pursed her lips, trying to bring herself back to that moment. Trying to envision it as a place she only needed to get to. Not a state of mind. Not a feeling. She needed to put those feelings aside, to not let them consume her like they did last time.
Control. She was the one in control.
The voice that responded to her thought caught her way off guard.
"Oh, so you want to be in control of me now? What happened to your disgust? Your disapproval?"
Costa's eyes snapped open and suddenly, she was somewhere else entirely.
In the abyss. At the edge of a cliff. Nothing but darkness blinked back at her. She inhaled and the air was moist, hard to breathe in. The drip of falling water echoed inside her ears. She turned her head, glancing around the place in bewilderment.
"Where am I?" Costa asked, just as a dark figure fazed into view right in front of her.
It looked just as distorted and possessed as she remembered it, with its hollowed out eyes and scratchy mouth- a petrified expression permanently glued onto its face. She forced herself to stare back at it, unfazed. She knew what it looked like, the pain and misery that crawled out of its dark eye sockets. It eerily tilted its head to one side, analyzing her reaction to its presence..
"We're inside of you, of us." It said as it stalked around her, water rising to its ankles. Costa finally looked down and realized she was ankle-deep in the black, murky water too. It spooked her for a second, to see herself in the reflection of the ripple. It laughed, a cruel and scratchy noise, "Does your own reflection scare you? How pathetic..."
"You're not the nicest parasite, are you?" Costa narrowed her eyes at It, huffing out a laugh. "-can't even go one second without mocking me."
She must've said something wrong, given it abruptly whipped its head all the way around to glare at her before its spindly limbs quickly crawled toward her, until they were nose to nose. Costa's eyes widened with fear as It yelled in her face, "I am not a parasite!"
"Sorry-" Costa stumbled back a step before steadying herself and breathing deeply, reminding herself to maintain control. Although, It continued to glare at her in anger, unhappy with her reaction as well as her choice of words. She forced her eyes to meet Its, to hold contact. "I'm sorry, you're right. I shouldn't have said that. You're.... you're me, right? The parts of me I've tried to suppress in the past..."
It blinked at her in response and Costa could see her reflection in it's big black eyes. She looked sickly in its gaze, as if it only saw her the way she saw It. Her expression softened as she looked longer at the reflection.
It'd taken a while for her to understand why it seemed so angry with her, so eager to hurt her. She asked herself why every training session, every night before dreamless sleep, every time she saw those two black streaks in her hair when looking in the mirror. One time she even swore she saw a glimpse of It's face in the mirror behind her and she screamed in fear and rage, "WHY?!" at it. But it never responded. It never responds when she wants it to.
"Don't pretend to be friendly-" It hissed at her, switching it's flip, anger prevalent in its features. "Do not act like you wouldn't get rid of me the first chance you could."
"Really? Then why haven't I?" Costa asked, biting back at it boldly. She even took a few steps toward it, leaning in close, just as it had done to her before. They competed in a stare down as Costa's expression hardened. She found and grasped that courage deep inside of her for dear life, pulling it to the surface. "Why haven't I found a way to get rid of you then?"
"You only want the power I can give you. You still don't want me here, you drug yourself to keep from seeing me in your sleep..." It met her with every step, refusing to back down. Costa swallowed, realizing this would be harder than she originally thought. "You're not the only one who wasn't given a choice."
Costa's eyebrows rose before softening out as she realized what It was saying. It didn't have a choice- a choice to be put into Costa's body. To be rehabilitated. But... did it really have its own feelings? Did she really offend it with her original reaction to its presence? Was that why she couldn't use it? It felt...unwanted?
"You and I both. But we don't have much of a choice now, do we?" She said, trying to reason with it. It stayed silent, allowing her room to continue. "Would you meet me halfway? A truce, at least for now? Until we have a better understanding of one another?"
It seemed to ponder over the offer, it's eyes blinking in thought. Costa watched in awe as conflict seemed to dance across its beady gaze, like a human making a tough decision. She pursed her lips observing it's jerky movements, it's spastic gestures as it's lips suddenly pulled back into a scowl. "No."
"No? Oh so you're stubborn now too?" Costa asked and it seemed to turn away, ignoring her. She clenched her fists at her sides as it began wandering off and she had to follow after it.
Aizawa's voice stabilized her, reminded her that she was standing in reality, as he said, "Coax it, be patient with it..."
"I'm trying." She couldn't tell if she said it out loud or not, given she was still inside her own mind, chasing after a non responsive quirk. It stopped paying attention to her, which she found odd, given its existence was solely dependent on her. She let out a huff, "What can I do to make you cooperate with me?"
It stopped right in it's tracks, staying still for several moments, until it slowly turned over one shoulder to look at her. In that moment, she saw the anger fade into despair, perhaps loneliness. Then it's croaky voice whispered, like a whistle on the wind. "Understand."
They shared one long look.
Costa gasped as she was sucked back into the room she was in, as if she were being pulled through a layer of ice water to snap back into reality. Costa blinked as she took in her surroundings: old furniture covered in crumpled leaves strewn about the place. How could she see? Who turned on the lights?
Her gaze lifted to the ring of fire hovering above their heads, lighting up the trailer.
But what truly drew her attention were the three figures staring back at her with expectant expressions. Aizawa rose an eyebrow, nodding at her, "Well you made no progress in creating shadow, but did you figure anything else out?"
"Maybe, perhaps." Costa bit her lip, eyes drawing away from them as she pondered over the recent interaction. She remembered the way it looked at her in that last moment, as if it resented her, as if it felt hated by her and was rebelling.
She unpacked every detail of the meeting with it. She even tried to explain how the only way she could even communicate with it is by sinking herself into a dark state of being. They all listened attentively as she explained the words they'd exchanged, the odd conflicting emotions she saw dancing across It's face when she encouraged a truce.
"It doesn't seem to like you very much." Todoroki stated bluntly. Costa playfully scowled at him, "Really?"
"Well, that could definitely be why you can't seem to use the quirk, it needs to give you permission and it doesn't seem inclined to do so as of now." Tokoyami scratched his beak, smoothing back his feathers. Then he cleared his throat, giving Costa a serious look. "It took time to build a relationship with Dark Shadow. It will take lots of time and lots of patience to slowly break the ice between you and your quirk. But it's very possible."
"So my homework is... team building with the parasite that lives inside of me?" Costa squinted at them, snarkiness laced through her tone. Aizawa rolled his eyes at her, pushing the trailer door open. They filed out as he held it open, shutting it closed behind him.
"First, you need to stop referring to it as so. This has as much to do with your feelings toward It as Its feelings toward you. It's apart of you, it can feel what you feel, see what you see." Tokoyami fell into step beside her and she attentively listened to every word he spoke, for he obviously knew what he was talking about.
Maybe Aizawa was right about bringing them in. Costa already felt like she was forming a better understanding of what she should do next.
"So not only do I have to convince it to like me, I have to convince myself to like it too?" Costa grimaced. Todorki glanced back at her, huffing out a quaint breath of a laugh. Costa's gaze flicked up to meet his, just as he answered.
"You have to accept that it's apart of you. Learn to understand it, just like it wants." Todoroki shrugged one shoulder and Tokoyami nodded in agreement to what he was saying. "Change your frame of mind. You're stuck with it after all, right?"
Aizawa and Costa made brief eye contact before she cleared her throat, dodging the question. "Should I stop taking my sleep meds then?"
They all looked conflicted until Aizawa piped up to answer the question, being the wisest and oldest one of the group. "Only go without the meds if you don't mind being a bit restless the next day. Maybe naps will help, given sleep triggers your interactions- gives you time to rest and bond with your new quirk without staying alert at night."
She snorted, shaking her head in disbelief. "Bond? This is ridiculous."
Tokoyami let out a long sigh, "It may appear that way, but this will be the most crucial part of mastering your quirk. If you cannot form a relationship with it, it just won't work."
Costa shut her mouth, letting the atmosphere around them fall silent. They made their way back to the PE grounds, indicating that training was officially over. She inhaled the leafy air with closed eyelids, trying to exhale all of this overwhelming energy that's built up over the past two weeks out, out, out of her system.
The three of them parted from Aizawa and walked back to the dormitory together, swapping quirk stories, tips and tricks. Tokoyami had much to say about Dark Shadow and she wasn't sure if it reassured her or scared her. For, Dark Shadow and Tokoyami were one and the same. They worked so well together that he'd managed to make a quite powerful quirk out of him.
She just wondered if she could do the same thing with It one day. Maybe her first step would be to stop calling it an it. It needed a name, something a bit more... humane. For, she was beginning to understand that it was actually more human than she originally thought it to be.
That night, she sat at her desk, drinking some zesty orange black tea with her laptop open. Her hair was messily thrown up into a floppy bun and she'd recently thrown on her plaid pajamas. Katsuki was sitting on her bed, doing his homework, all the while, Costa spent half an hour spinning around in her desk chair in between google searches: Names and their meanings. Names meaning darkness. Names meaning inner-self. Names meaning soul.
It wasn't until she'd drained her mug and closed ten tabs of wikipedia pages that she finally leaned back in her chair and nodded to herself, "Tesha. I think Tesha is good."
"What?" Katsuki blinked in confusion at her from where he laid on his stomach, spread across her comforter as if he were in his own damn room. Costa spun around in her chair, halting when she faced him and smiled, "I'm naming it."
"It?"
"My quirk. I think it should have a name instead of just saying it all the time. It's inhumane." She explained, wiggling her bare toes as she pressed her knees up against her chest. Katsuki only rose an eyebrow in response, growing even more puzzled than he'd been before. "And why are you naming it as if it is a human?"
"Tokoyami said step number one is bonding with it, getting it to trust me with the exchange of acceptance. I think naming it would be a good first step. So, Tesha it is. That's how we'll refer to her." She nodded again, liking the way the name rolled off the tip of her tongue and wafted in the air in front of her. It felt right.
Katsuki held out an arm and nodded back toward the bed, causing Costa to snicker as she slipped out of the chair and made her way over to him.
She sighed as she sunk onto the bed, just as he propped himself up on an elbow, snaking an arm around her waist and pulling her closer so that he could plant a kiss on her temple. "Okay but... are you sure you want that?" She wrapped her own arms around his neck, nuzzling closer until she was basically sitting in his lap. "I want to at least try. I'd feel like a quitter if I didn't."
"Hm." He nodded, eyes flashing with understanding. He'd feel the exact same way if he were in her position. Then one of his eyebrows quirked, the obvious question finally popping into his head. "Wait, what does Tesha even mean anyway? Why that name?"
She smiled at him for a moment and there was a knowing glint in her honey eyes. He knocked his shoulder into hers. "C'mon, what does it mean?"
She leaned her head against his, kissing his nose lightly, before pulling back and sighing. She stared at some spot on her wall and her voice was quiet when she uttered the meaning of the name she'd picked out.
"Survivor." She swallowed. "It means survivor."