Ryder maliciously stomps his way to an unsuspecting Lucan causing my concern for Lucan's wellbeing to grow. Over the years I've seen the guys get into fights with one another, but the glint in Ryder's eyes screams this was not one of those time. This is something deeper. Something darker.
I pick up my pace hoping I will be able to catch him before he reaches his destination, but I was too slow to register what his intent was and he reaches Lucan. Then again Ryder was moving like a train and stopping on of them on a dime is next to impossible.
Ryder reaches his unaware target and I'm still a few paces behind him. Lucan turns to Ryder with a smile and raises his beer in greeting. Ryder is not so friendly. Instead he shoved Lucan by the shoulders causing him to stumble backwards and spill his beer.
"What the fuck is your problem," Lucan yells wiping the spilled beer from his arms.
Ryder clenches his hands at his side for a moment collecting his thoughts and then says one word. "You."
Lucan takes a step back in shock because to him this was coming out of left field. "Me? I've barely spoken to you all day. What could I have possibly done for you to react like this?" By now everyone's attention is riveted to scene taking place between Ryder and Lucan.
"Ryder," I say softly hoping my voice will pull him from this red haze he is in. I even lay my hand on his arm, which to my displeasure he shakes off.
"Not now Aubree," he seethes causing me to curl into myself. "This is between me and Lucan."
Lucan glances around Ryder to look at me. "Can you please tell me what the fuck has happened to set him off?" I really feel bad for Lucan having all of Ryder's fury directed to him when he has done nothing wrong. The conversation that had taken place with Lucan about my past had happened so long ago all of this was uncalled for. If Ryder would stop and listen to me all of this could easily be cleared.
Ryder positions himself so he is blocking me from Lucan with his body. "Don't fucking look at her let alone talk to her." His tone changes to one of betrayal with his next words. "I trusted you! I fucking trusted you." Lucan's head falls forward as though he is replaying the last few hours and trying to decipher what could be having Ryder up in arms like this.
"Ryder you need to chill man," Dimitri interjects trying to defuse the situation, but when Skylar attempts to move to my side he grabs her arm and shakes his head. Ryder shifts his attention to Dimitri so he continues, "whatever you think Lucan did or didn't do I'm sure is all just a misunderstanding. We are family and none of us would ever intentionally do something to hurt a member of this family."
I watch while Mason and Tray take up a position around us. Tray lends his reasoning to the soon to be fight. "Dimitri is right. More than likely you are making a mountain out of a mole hill." Ryder narrows his eyes in Tray's direction not at all agreeing his his observation. I try to pled with my eyes for Tray to shut up for once. We already are dealing with Ryder wanting to beat the shit out of Lucan don't need him also wanting to beat the shit out of Tray.
Tray takes a step back behind Skylar using her for cover. Skylar playful glares at him and whispers chicken. Tray shrugs his shoulders and makes no move to come out from behind her. At least he stopped talking.
Now that Tray was out of his line of sight Ryder's glare returns to Lucan. He shakes his finger in Lucan's face while he talks. "You know exactly how I feel about Aubree. The night after the fight you sat there and listened to me go on and on about how much in love with her I am."
At his disclosure my eyes frantically roam the room seeking to learn how the rest of the band is reacting to his confession. To my astonishment not a single one of them appear outraged or perplexed. Had we not been as discreate as I had thought we were being. I know Skylar knew and by default Dimitri. Also Tray had caught us together and seems Ryder opened up about his feelings to Lucan. So Mason was the only one and if this was the first time he was learning of Ryder's and my relationship his expression was giving nothing away.
Lucan drops his voice by an octave. "I do" He shakes his head, "but I have no idea what you are getting at. We all know that the two of you are in love with each other," he pauses for a moment. "What we can't figure out is what is preventing the two of you from figuring your shit out. This needs to stop. We are going on part two of the tour soon with another band and we need the both of you to have your heads on straight."
"My head is just fine," Ryder snaps. I tense over Lucan's statement because if Ryder had his way we would already be together. I was the one holding us back. Maybe I was being misguided in my thought process. Ryder is nothing like Adam and every day he continues to show me just how different he is from him.
Lucan stares him down with a raised brow waiting for Ryder to continue. "If you know how I feel about her then why the fuck is she going to you."
"To me for what? The only thing Aubree really comes to me for is anything pertaining to the band." Lucan explain.
Ryder lets out a dark laugh. At this point I decide to try jumping into the conversation taking a fistful of the back of his shirt. "Ryder I promise you Lucan is far from my confidant. Other then you the only other person I really talk to is Skylar." This seems to satisfy him because his muscle become less tense and he no longer appears as thought he is going to annihilate Lucan.
He turns his neck to stare at me. "Then why when I mentioned you needing to find someone to talk to your eyes drifted to Lucan."
I start down at my hands for a moment and shift uncomfortable from one foot to the other. When I speak my words come out a mumbles mess. "Because at one point I was talking to Lucan about my past." Hesitantly I raise my eyes to meet his. "But that was a long time ago. Right when I first came to work with the band."
I catch Lucan's eyes for a moment and I watch as they slowly light when he remembers what I was referring to. He nods his head in memory, but then his forehead furrows when he addresses me. "Wait a second after all these years you still haven't told him."
"Timing never seemed right," I grimaced. Hearing my words for the copout they were. The door of my past has been sealed shut and I wanted nothing to do with reopening it. I wasn't trying to hide what was behind it from Ryder. I glace off to the side my eyes welling with tears.
Ryder sensing my discomfort and putting his own animosity to the side gathers me in his arms and holds me tight against his chest. I bury my face into his chest hoping the dark t-shirt will help to hide the few tears who managed to leak from my eyes. He runs his hands soothingly up and down my back murmuring words of comfort into my ear. I wrap my arms around him and cling to him. He responds to my sudden display of public affection by resting his cheek on top of my head.
I'm sure my actions surprise him because they surprise me. Whenever he would try to take me in his arms in public I would shy away. The only other time we did anything remotely relationship like in public was when Skylar was in the hospital and we held hands. Thinking of that causes my mind to wander to when Skylar was in the hospital.
The smell of hospitals always bothered me and the gloomy atmosphere that always seemed to lurk in the building. We had been in Skylar's room for about a hour now watching her sleep. How I wish she would wake up. The doctor told us she would be okay, but we all needed to physically see her up and about to actually believe his words.
From my place on the couch my eyes soften when they land on Dimitri. He was sitting in a chair next to her bed holding her hand where he has been since we entered her room. The light in his eyes was completely gone and all the was left was a shell of a broken man. There were no words I could think to tell him to make him feel any better.
Tray was pacing the room like that of a caged lion. He was taking all of this as hard as Dimitri was. Skylar was like a sister to him and it pained him to see her like this. Tray was also with Dimitri when they had originally found her. Neither one of them seemed inclined to discuss what they had come across. They told their stories to the police, but that was it.
Lucan had taken his place next to the door standing with his arms crossed and reminding me of a bouncer at a club. He was not going to let anyone in who didn't belong there. A few nurses have tried to sneak in to get a peek at the guys and to take pictures. Hence for Lucan's position. I had contacted the president of the hospital and she had assured me they would be dealt with. She also informed me she would send hospital security to stand guard, but that wasn't enough for Lucan.
Mason was seated in the other chair lost in thought. This entire situation has not been easy for him. Being in a hospital always brought up a darker time for him and add in someone he cares about being hurt not a good mix at all. I'll have to remind the guys they are going to need to keep a close eye on him to make sure he doesn't end up falling down the rabbit whole again.
Ever since we realized Skylar was missing he hasn't said much, other then to get into Dimitri's face. The second we got to the hospital he too became a shell. Only perking up when we first saw Skylar. My heart went out to him.
Ryder was sitting next to me also lost in his own thoughts similar to Mason. He had an arm draped casually along the back of the couch and every now and again I would feel his fingers graze the back of my neck. What I really wanted to do was curl myself into his arms, but there were too many people around. I wasn't really for the guys to know something was going on between Ryder and myself.
My phone would continuously buzz indicating an incoming text. I was trying to get ahead of the story and only release what we wanted the public to know. So far I have been able to do just that with all my connections. Eventually I would need to do some kind of press release, but I was trying to wait for Skylar to wake up first.
Ryder starts to bounce his leg, something he would do when he was upset, and I reach out a hand to rest on his knee hoping he would stop. When I make contact he instantly freezes and I can feel his eyes on me. The energy in the room was starting to get to me and I needed some air.
"I'm going to go get coffee," I say figuring by this point we are all beyond tired and could use some. "Does any one want any?" The guys mutter their request. All except Dimitri who's entire focus was on the woman laying in the bed before him. I don't even know if he heard me. Instead of asking him again I decide I'll just bring him back something. If he drinks it he drinks it and if he doesn't then that's what sinks are for.
As I stand Ryder stands next to me. "I'll joint you to help carry it all." Then softer he says, "plus I need to get out of here before I punch Tray for his obsessive pacing."
Suppressing a laugh over his comment I make my way to the door with Ryder resting his hand against my lower back. Lucan steps to the side allowing us to pass him and into the brightly lit hallway. Once in the hallway Ryder nods to the two guards standing next to the door in acknowledgement.
Thankfully it was later in the evening and there was less staff mulling around. We had no problems riding the elevator to the lower level, in fact we didn't run into anyone. The hospital coffee shop came into view and we slipped inside.
The welcoming smell of coffee tickled my nose. If need be I could easily give up anything in my diet, but not coffee. Coffee was the one thing I would never be able to do without. I would rather be ten feet under then never being able to drink coffee. Drastic I know, but coffee was that important to me.
The older lady behind the register didn't recognize Ryder or if she did she made no indication of such. Maybe she figured since we were here we weren't in the mood to be bombarded. Whatever the reason was I was grateful. I was not in the right mindset to be dealing with anything more this evening.
We place our orders and stand off to the side to wait for her to make them. My eyes shift out the front window and see a small growing crowd of photographers. Seems they are already starting to conjugate in front. Do these people not have anything better to do with their time? Apparently not. Thankfully the binds were preventing them from noticing us.
Ryder bumps his shoulder against mine, "you okay?"
I tilt my head to the side and study him for a second. "Shouldn't I be the one asking you if you are okay?"
He shrugs his shoulders. "Aubree you're allowed to be upset over this. I get you trying to be strong in front of the other and especially Dimitri, but I'm the only one here. You're allowed to fall apart if you need to. My shoulder is more the sturdy enough to help hold you up."
Before I allow myself to over think my actions I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him down for a kiss. At first he only stood there in shock over my action, but he quickly recovers and moves his lips against mine. His finger tips dig into my hips as though he is afraid to touch me more than that thinking I would run away. Right now I don't feel like running. I want the comfort only he can offer me.
A clearing of a throat bring an end to our kiss and we turn to discover the older lady beaming at us.
"I remember when my Albert and I were young and in love. We too couldn't keep our hands off of one another. "
Ryder and I smile at each other both enjoying the quite moment we were able to find. Ryder breaks the silence. "If only I could convince her to be with me." His words make me want to hit him, but I refrain myself because we weren't alone. Instead I tell him with my eyes he is in so much trouble.
The lady addresses me with her words of wisdom. "Hunny when you find someone who looks at you the way he does you hold on with both hands and never let go. You will only find a love like that once in your life time and on top of that only a lucky few ever do."
Ryder smiles at me as though he is saying told you so. Her words may be true, but my fear is also real. I wish being with Ryder was as easy as she was making it seem. There was so much behind the curtain preventing me to follow my heart.
She returns to cleaning and Ryder grabs the coffee. "Shall we?"
"Can we sit for a moment. I'm not ready to head back up." Ryder nods his head and leads me to a table.
He hands me my coffee and a take a deep whiff of the amazing brew in my hand before taking a tentative drink. The coffee floods my taste buds with its wonderful flavor forcing me to close my eyes.
Ryder removes me from my happy place with his words. "It never ceases to amaze me how turned on you get from a cup of coffee."
I narrow my eyes at him. "There is nothing wrong with enjoying a cup of coffee."
His eyes sparkle with amusement that had been lacking since we realized Skylar was missing. "You're right there is nothing wrong with enjoying a cup off coffee, but Bree you take it to a whole new level."
I stick my tongue out at him causing him to have a belly aching laugh. I catch the lady behind the counter send us a smile.
Glancing down at my coffee I say, "do you really think she will be okay?"
Ryder leans back in his chair appearing to be relaxed. "I do because she has to be she has no other option."
I nod my head in agreement. Skylar might be new to our little family, but she is already an integral member. If she was to never wake up not only would we lose Dimitri, but I also think Tray wouldn't be far to follow.
"Are you okay? I'm sure being here had to be bringing up unwanted memories."
His mouth tightens giving the only indication he was upset. Ryder glances off to the side for a moment making me fear he won't respond to my question. He lets out a soft sigh before speaking. "The memories might be knocking at the door, but unlike Mason I'm able to keep them at bay. He's the one you need to be worried about not me."
I reach my hand across the table and take his. "She may not have been your blood sister, but she was still your sister too." He takes my hand in a death grip and offers me a tight smile.
"Ready to head back," he asks putting an end to our conversation. I nod my head in answer.
When I go to remove my hand from his he tightens his hold and shakes his head no. I glance at him and can see him pleading me with his eyes to not let him go. I've already kissed him in public which is something I've never really done before and the guys will probably be more focused on Skylar to pay attention to us so I decide to keep my hand in his.
My memories clear from my head and the comfort of Ryder's embrace brings me back to the present. Being wrapped in his arms is one of my favorite places in the word and I've been to a lot of places.
After a few minutes more he whispers in my ear, "want to get out of here." I tense for a moment in his arms and he quickly adds, "we don't have to talk or anything. Unless you want to." I could detect the hopefulness in his voice. Maybe it was time for me to clear the air about a few things. Then maybe we could move on from here.
I pull back slightly in his embrace to start into his deep brown eyes. "Yes please," I tell him.
Ryder wastes no time getting me out the door. We say our hurried goodbyes and Skylar makes me promise to call her tomorrow. Once again we offer our congratulations and then are out the door heading to his rental car.