MY FOREVER

Rosy Pov - Chapter 22

I called out his name at the top of my lungs but he didn't turn back instead he just kept walking. We were building a strong friendship, i can't let it crumble. He reached his car  and my heart shattered.

"Sam please stop" i pleaded my tears threatening to spill again. He stopped but didn't turn to face me instead he just faced the other way with his head hanging low. I felt like i owed him an explanation.

"Jack is my close friend." I say  standing behind him in my pink wanzi.

"I'm sure he is." He said i could sense the sadness in his voice. His voice sounded defeated like when we were in high school.  The anger hidden in a way that you knew he was doing his best to hold himself back.

"Is it me?"he asks while turning to face me .

"Excuse me?" I ask feeling afraid now that im face to face with him. I now could see the raging storm im his eyes. A storm i last saw in high school.  The storm was back and that sent a shivers down my spine. I started breathing heavily and my hands were shaking mercilessly.

"What does he have that i don't have?" Sam asks calmly. The calm before the mighty storm.

"I give you my attention, patience and love. Rosy i give you my all and in return. In return all i get is rejection. Why do yoy hate me Rosy! Tell me, tell me why you hate me please explain what im lacking?" He shouts with so much pain in his voice. His eyes reddening and his own tears threatening to spill.

"I don't hate you Sam I I............"

"If you don't hate me then why don't you love me? Why Rosy please tell me. Tell me what it will take for you to reciprocate my love please i beg you." He say and takes both my hands into his. Now i realise his hands are also bruised. His eyes brimmed with tears.

"Please  don't  start  this topic again. I don't know how many times i have to tell you this but i don't have feelings for you. I can't force myself to like you in that way Sam." I answer hoping he would understand.  Please let him understand.

"And i can't  force myself to stop loving you " he says

"I was the foolish guy who loved you from a distance . When we were paired in science class i knew we needed to be together. We are perfect for each other Rosy."

"Sam stop it! Just move on, there are so many girls who want you please!" I say angrily. There is no need to track back into the past.  Why was he doing this?

"Don't you think i have tried? Do you think i enjoy the fact that you haunt my dreams every night yet in reality i can't have you. So many girls i have  been with to try and wipe yoy from my memory  i just can't Rosy !"

"Sam please "

"No let me finish............ I never knew love growing up. I hated this world and everything in it. My own mom used to tell me everyday that she hates me, every single day i was reminded how my father abandoned me. I was told nobody would ever love me. Well life went on and i got used to it. Its not my fault i got in the wrong side of the law i had to survive." He says a tear escaping one of his eyes which he quickly wiped off.
"People hated me after i can out of Juvenile. I gave up on love, life and everything else." He stays silent for a minute before continuing
" The best decision i have ever made, well so i thought was returning to school to prove that im not a loser. That's where i met you, my sweetness in the midst of a bitter life. Although i couldn't properly express it, i had strong feelings for you .Now i regret meeting you." He says while opening the door to his car.

"My first love." He says while turning and facing me again. "Rosy you are my first and only love."

"Stop it! I have had it up to here Sam shut up! What's wrong with you? I have been repeating myself for years. Can we just move on and........." i say losing it. How many times should i repeat myself before he understands that i don't love him.