Desire

Trauma

TWENTY-THREE | Wooyoung's P.O.V

The tears slipping down my cheeks as if they were salt water, eventually found itself slowly entering my mouth. My head was no longer at ease, and neither was my heart. All I could think about was him: his face, his smile, his urge to comb his fingers with his hair, his hands, his body, the way he treated me, and amazing nights and mornings we spent together. Why am I so stupid! Snapping into realization about the fact that San is no longer in my life which made me cry even harder. My heart felt like it was shattering into a million of pieces and my breathing slowly became unstable. Grasping the soft fabric of my shirt, I could feel my chest tighten up and the non-existing air in my throat trying to find its way to me but failing tragically. Not being able to breathe I closed my eyes and tried to find an escape out of my sad thoughts, but there was no antidote to my pain. 

"Wooyoung? How about you go take a breather outside." I was too zoned out to comprehend anything around me. All I could do is give into the agonizing pain that I felt. Feeling myself slip away I felt a hands on my arms helping me out my seat I grasped onto the arms of the person until I was rushed into another classroom. 

"Jung?" I heard a familiar angelic spoke in a hush tone. 

Looking up my insides turned into liquid, and I could feel myself get captured in mesmerizing gaze of him. Those dark brown eyes I missed so much were staring right back at me, and all I wanted to do was savor every moment of it. Suddenly the non-existing air appeared and filled my lungs. The tears that rained from my eyes had suddenly came to slowed pace, and my heartbeat was now uncontrollable almost to the point where my heart could beat out my chest. 

"Sa-Sannie?" I uttered, tears slowly walking down my cheeks again. 

"Please call me Mr. Choi...thank you." He ordered while walking towards the door and closing it. "Now can you tell me why Mr. Lee ran into the room and had me come get you because you weren't moving, you just sat there crying and shaking? What's going on?" 

"I can't do this...I can't be without you San. Every time I think about you I start to cry and I start to feel like I'm going to die. I'm really sorry okay. I swear I'll never do it again okay just please...please Sannie, take me back." I cried harder while looking into his eyes that showed no remorse and not a hint of care in the world for me. 

As he started to walk back to his seat, I quickly got up and wrapped my arms around his waist for dear life. "Please." I cried out.

"Did I tell you to sleep with him?! Huh!" He yelled as tears streamed down his face uncontrollably.

Grabbing my wrist and yanked my arms off him, and wiped his tears away. "Look at you...begging me to take you back when we didn't even have to be in this predicament if it wasn't for you. I stayed up for a week straight, wondering what the fuck I did wrong! What about me made you cheat? What does he have that I don't have? Because you know about my past, you know how hurt I was and you sat there and cheated on me with someone who constantly cheated on you. I'm really starting to think that maybe I'm just not enough for anyone. Maybe I'm not meant to be loved by someone because every time I let someone this close they cheat on me. Was I not enough for you? What did I do wrong?" His eyes were now filled with tears and all you could see is a tinted red glossing over his eyes due to house much he was crying.

"You were more than enough Sannie. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me. I-I don't know why I did it. I feel so stupid." I ineffectively reassured.

"Just get out. My last class is about to come in." He wiped his tears away and, walked back to his seat and sat down while getting out a lot of packets.